# I saw Mommy punching Santa Claus . . . A Xmas story **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [December 19, 2006, 8:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-saw-mommy-punching-santa-claus-a-xmas-story/384828 "2006-12-19T20:36:34Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Eve](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Eve](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eve)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2006, 8:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-saw-mommy-punching-santa-claus-a-xmas-story/384828/1 "2006-12-19T20:36:34Z")
From one of my coworkers, who got it straight from his girlfriend, who saw this happen last night (take that as a FOAF cite, if you will). He adds, “You probably won’t read about it, as it’s being hush-hushed so as to protect the holy commerce of the season.” Story begins with two young-teen girls (about 13 and 14) sitting down in Santa’s lap . . . > [@](#): > > He wrapped his arms around them and mentioned in a heavy New Jersey accent that “these are gonna be some nice pictures.” They leapt from his lap screaming that he said “they were gonna be some nice bitches!” Momma ran over and punched Santa in the face. He jumped up and started hurling obscenities at them while horrified parents covered kids’ ears. The police were summoned. The mother punched a policeman in the face. After ma was subdued they found that she had numerous warrants against her, so they schlepped her away. Santa was removed from his post and replaced with another kinder, gentler fat man. The father of the fine young girls showed up to the mall hours later and without question started belting the new and bewildered Santa. Police showed, took down daddy, and, lo and behold, he too had warrants. Happy holidays! ---
**Author:** ![Eve](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Eve](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eve)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2006, 8:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-saw-mommy-punching-santa-claus-a-xmas-story/384828/2 "2006-12-19T20:40:04Z")
If anyone can expose this as an Urban Legend I will be both grateful and disappointed . . . I hope some elf had a camera, if it _is_ true. ---
**Author:** ![Tinkertoy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/f19dbf/32.png) [@Tinkertoy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tinkertoy)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2006, 9:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-saw-mommy-punching-santa-claus-a-xmas-story/384828/3 "2006-12-19T21:05:50Z")
Now see if they would feature events like this instead of WWF I’d rent alot more pay-per-veiws. ---
**Author:** ![zoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zoid/32/336_2.png) [@zoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/zoid)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2006, 9:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-saw-mommy-punching-santa-claus-a-xmas-story/384828/4 "2006-12-19T21:06:15Z")
Holy Christmas **Eve**! I think you’ve got the makings of a screenplay there! ---
**Author:** ![Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e480ec/32.png) [@Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Least_Original_User_Name_Ever)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2006, 9:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-saw-mommy-punching-santa-claus-a-xmas-story/384828/5 "2006-12-19T21:08:22Z")
Wow. That’s some…wild stuff there. ---
**Author:** ![Harmonious\_Discord](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/74df32/32.png) [@Harmonious\_Discord](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Harmonious_Discord)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2006, 9:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-saw-mommy-punching-santa-claus-a-xmas-story/384828/6 "2006-12-19T21:25:40Z")
The only way this would not be in the paper, is if nobody was in the mall to witness this. Two occurences of punching the mall Santa doesn’t miss the papers. ---
**Author:** ![Eve](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Eve](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eve)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2006, 9:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-saw-mommy-punching-santa-claus-a-xmas-story/384828/7 "2006-12-19T21:27:27Z")
I Snopes’d it and it didn’t turn up . . . I am rather looking forward to throwing it back in my coworker’s face . . . ---
**Author:** ![Kalhoun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/3bc359/32.png) [@Kalhoun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kalhoun)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2006, 9:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-saw-mommy-punching-santa-claus-a-xmas-story/384828/8 "2006-12-19T21:39:30Z")
Please gawd…let it be true. Let it be\* true!\* ---
**Author:** ![teela\_brown](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/d9b06d/32.png) [@teela\_brown](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/teela_brown)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2006, 9:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-saw-mommy-punching-santa-claus-a-xmas-story/384828/9 "2006-12-19T21:41:21Z")
Sounds like a scene from _Bad Santa_. ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2006, 10:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-saw-mommy-punching-santa-claus-a-xmas-story/384828/10 "2006-12-19T22:37:42Z")
I’m posting so if somebody **does** find a link, I’ll hear of it. ---
**Author:** ![Rick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/9f8e36/32.png) [@Rick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rick)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2006, 11:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-saw-mommy-punching-santa-claus-a-xmas-story/384828/11 "2006-12-19T23:10:02Z")
::: Prays::: Pleaseletitbetrue, Pleaseletitbetrue, Pleaseletitbetrue, Pleaseletitbetrue, Pleaseletitbetrue, Pleaseletitbetrue, Pleaseletitbetrue. ---
**Author:** ![Otto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/bbe5ce/32.png) [@Otto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Otto)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2006, 11:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-saw-mommy-punching-santa-claus-a-xmas-story/384828/12 "2006-12-19T23:45:38Z")
Couldn’t find the New Jersey story but I did find this one about a phony mall Santa [unwrapping his package](http://www.local6.com/news/5482200/detail.html). ---
**Author:** ![swampbear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampbear/32/467_2.png) [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2006, 11:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-saw-mommy-punching-santa-claus-a-xmas-story/384828/13 "2006-12-19T23:56:09Z")
**Eve** if you can script this, I foresee next Christmas’s blockbuster Lifetime Movie. You even have the perfect title! ---
**Author:** ![bbs2k](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e495f1/32.png) [@bbs2k](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bbs2k)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2006, 11:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-saw-mommy-punching-santa-claus-a-xmas-story/384828/14 "2006-12-20T11:25:33Z")
[QUOTE=Bosda Di’Chi of Tricor] I’m posting so if somebody **does** find a link, I’ll hear of it. [/QUOTE] Ditto. A quick search of headlines reveals nothing so far. ---
**Author:** ![Zsofia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/7bcc69/32.png) [@Zsofia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zsofia)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2006, 7:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-saw-mommy-punching-santa-claus-a-xmas-story/384828/15 "2006-12-20T19:15:03Z")
Here in town we had a guy in a Santa suit with a motorcycle take a little girl on a ride without her parents’ permission, and there was a _chase_ that went like 80 miles an hour with the frantic dad trying to run down Santa, and got his kid back, and when they went to the bar to arrest him Santa left his hat and a half a glass of whiskey on the bar and was hiding in the utility room. No kidding! And he apologized for taking their daughter with “I was in a Santa mood”. ---
**Author:** ![Billdo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/billdo/32/315_2.png) [@Billdo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Billdo)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2006, 7:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-saw-mommy-punching-santa-claus-a-xmas-story/384828/16 "2006-12-20T19:57:21Z")
Last weekend there was some sort of event where dozens of guys in Santa suits were running around the City. I saw a whole flock of them by Lincoln Center in the afternoon, dashing into Barnes & Noble to use the bathrooms. Later, in the early evening there were several of the Santas stumbling around 14th Street, obviously well into the Christmas cheer. The most amusing was this drunken Santa was arguing with this girl in striped elf hose about whether or not she was going to go home with him, she adamantly insisting that he had promised that he would, and he contending that even if he had said he would earlier, he was under no obligation to do so now. After seeing several rounds of this as we were picking up flowers in the deli they were battling outside, we left before the final resolution, picking our way about the weaving red suits. ---
**Author:** ![tomndebb](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b9e5f3/32.png) [@tomndebb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tomndebb)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2006, 4:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-saw-mommy-punching-santa-claus-a-xmas-story/384828/17 "2006-12-21T04:27:14Z")
I hate to ruin a good story, but what was the purported witness doing that she saw the first assault, heard from the cops that the assailant had outstanding warrants, was still there some undetermined period of time later, witnessed the second assault, was still around when the cops showed up, and was then privy to the info that the second assailant had outstanding warrants? (What with gossipy police dispatchers, drinking buddy cops, and people monitoring the police band on the radio, I would never claim that the information _could_ not be out there (although it makes not seeing it in the news a bit odd), but the story appears to hang on the testimony of a nearly omniscient bystander.) ---
**Author:** ![bdgr](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/a87d85/32.png) [@bdgr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bdgr)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2006, 7:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-saw-mommy-punching-santa-claus-a-xmas-story/384828/18 "2006-12-22T19:36:23Z")
[QUOTE=tomndebb] I hate to ruin a good story, but what was the purported witness doing that she saw the first assault, heard from the cops that the assailant had outstanding warrants, was still there some undetermined period of time later, witnessed the second assault, was still around when the cops showed up, and was then privy to the info that the second assailant had outstanding warrants? (What with gossipy police dispatchers, drinking buddy cops, and people monitoring the police band on the radio, I would never claim that the information _could_ not be out there (although it makes not seeing it in the news a bit odd), but the story appears to hang on the testimony of a nearly omniscient bystander.) [/QUOTE] now now, it could have come from mall security, or a mall employee who was stuck in a booth near the event. ---
**Author:** ![Pixiesnix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/898d66/32.png) [@Pixiesnix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pixiesnix)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2006, 6:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-saw-mommy-punching-santa-claus-a-xmas-story/384828/19 "2006-12-23T06:08:09Z")
What were two young-teen girls doing sitting on Santa’s lap in the first place? Isn’t that age a bit too old? ---
**Author:** ![Otto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/bbe5ce/32.png) [@Otto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Otto)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2006, 6:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-saw-mommy-punching-santa-claus-a-xmas-story/384828/20 "2006-12-23T06:11:19Z")
My last trip to Santa’s lap was in my late 20s, with my best friend. Never too old for a campy picture on Santa’s lap. Santa didn’t call us bitches, though. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-saw-mommy-punching-santa-claus-a-xmas-story/384828.md?page=2)