Ya know, Kayaker never said if HE was wearing anything. In fact he said his ears were nekkid (no hearing aid).
I would not want to use a chainsaw naked.
Something like this happened to me once. I heard some kids out by the barn so I grabbed my chainsaw and put on my mask made from human skin…
Oh God! Kayaker, between you and the other posters in this thread I have tears of laughter rolling down my face. I needed a good laugh today-THANKS!
So you busted a gut laughing?
Is this anything like “hiking the Appalachian trail”?
mrAru slaughtered a couple sheep, I did not watch as I was busy elsewhere that saturday.
A few weeks later, a friend was visiting and came running back to the house, there was a noose in the woods, over a filled in pit and there was blood on the ground :eek:
He used the noose to hang the sheep by a bar through the hind legs tendons, over an open pit to hold the guts we didn’t want to use [mmmm heart =)] and then backfilled the pit of odds and ends and blood after wrapping up the body and hides.
This seems to be one of those “place the comma in a certain location to change the sentence” sentences.
So, I wonder where the young couple might’ve heard the comma?
The gut-pile really sells the effect, but a mask of some kind would have put it over the top. 
My terrify-random-strangers story does not involve chainsaws or gut-piles, but it does have a mask, and the random strangers were teenage girls and really excellent screamers.
I was playing the role of a stop-motion dinosaur guarding a shrine to Ray Harryhausen we had set up in a park. My job was to remain hidden until teams playing the game approached the shrine and began examining it–a task facilitated by the camouflaging effect of the green dino costume I was wearing (complete with a very toothy mask). That, combined with a measure of natural sneakiness, enabled me to pull “clever girl” moments on every team (and even on the gamemasters who knew I was supposed to be there).
This was, however, a public park. Mundanes passed by occasionally, including an elderly Asian gentlemen with his twin grandchildren, who really made me wish I had a camera as they bracketed the shrine. Most never saw me, because I was concealed in the foliage on a little side-trail and keeping very still…until two girls happened to approach along that trail from behind me. I was quite motionless, listening for my team, and paying no attention to them…until their approach startled a squirrel that was foraging right in front of my feet, and he climbed me to jump into a tree. I turned to look in their direction just as they tracked on the squirrel’s movement.
Cue piercing shrieks (and a belated, “Oh, hi.” from me that was lost on the wind of their passage), and they were gone, pelting toward the parking lot. I don’t know what–if anything–they told people up there, but no cops, mobs with pitchforks, or zoo personnel came looking for me.
Balance, that sounds like the world’s most perfect job.
NPCs like to have fun, too. 
these are great stories, wish I could just be normal and not scare, especially small children and dogs. but to really scare adults, that is truly great, they need it once in a while so that they might remember what happiness and joy are all about. Very good and really a good laugh too. gutpile
Picture if you will, a farm set back in some pleasant rolling countryside that then backs up to a forest.
This farm resides in a location that has a reputation among local teens as a marijuana growing area. This is based on some busts 20-odd years before. It’s now more of an urban myth.
Imagine now, four hunters sitting quietly and well concealed in cover in an area that they know feral pigs frequent.
See now, a group of six teenagers ‘exploring’ the area, who unwittingly stop a dozen yards from the hunting party and start discussing where they might find some of the MJ plants they had heard grew locally.
Our intrepid explorers received a significant surprise when four armed men* appear out of the undergrowth like a group of middle-aged Predators and quite politely informed the kids that they were in the wrong location and they probably should stop trespassing on private property
- None of use were in camouflage gear, just wearing drab colours and well hidden. We also came out of cover with our rifles slung and in no way were aggressive. Just amused at the look on the kids faces.
I like how you said the hunters came out of the woods “Predator style”
We once got a call from the Ontario Provincial Police that they were requesting permission to investigate a “possible grave site” on my dad’s woodlot (I assume that had it not been forthcomming, they would get a warrant). Of course my dad said yes.
Then he rushed up north to find out what was going on.
What it turned out to be … a couple of months before, my dad had given permission for the Boy Scouts to camp on his land. They had dug a latrine … a pit about six feet long … and some hikers (trespassing) had discovered it and called the cops.
When my dad got there, the cops had just discoverd for themselves what the pit contained.