# I should be getting hazard pay! **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [August 17, 2001, 3:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-should-be-getting-hazard-pay/76683 "2001-08-17T03:37:56Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Geobabe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/geobabe/32/3908_2.png) [@Geobabe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Geobabe)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2001, 3:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-should-be-getting-hazard-pay/76683/1 "2001-08-17T03:37:56Z")
I was attacked by a wild animal tonight. OK, it was just a chipmunk, but the damn thing BIT ME! As some of you know, I am a ranger at Wolf Trap, the national park for the performing arts. Earlier tonight, an usher came into the ranger station and said there was a chipmunk by the bathrooms that was acting strange, so another ranger and I went down to take a look at it. It was sitting there not moving, so I poked it to see if it was alive. It was, so I put on my rubber gloves to pick it up and relocate it to the woods to live out the rest of its likely short life. As soon as I tried to pick it up, it got plenty lively and scooted away from me. I tried again and as soon as I got a grip on it, it turned around and bit me on the finger. I threw it down on the ground in an attempt to reclaim my finger, and it just lay there. I went and washed my finger and scrubbed it with alcohol wipes while the others captured the beast. Animal Control came and got it and looked at my finger and determined that it was indeed a bite and not a scratch. The officer said it’s almost 100% likely that the rabies test will come back negative, so that’s a relief, though I won’t know for sure until Monday, since the critter won’t get tested until tomorrow (and yes, sad to say, testing for rabies will require the expiration of the poor thing, but I don’t think it was feeling too well anyway). I’m gonna check my shot records to see if my tetanus vacination is current and if not, I’m going to get a booster, which hopefully, workmen’s comp will pay for. Never knew my job was gonna be so dangerous. ---
**Author:** ![Montfort](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d6d6ee/32.png) [@Montfort](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Montfort)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2001, 3:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-should-be-getting-hazard-pay/76683/2 "2001-08-17T03:55:28Z")
Well, it’s better than getting bitten by a concert goer. Right? ---
**Author:** ![Rossarian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/3e96dc/32.png) [@Rossarian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rossarian)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2001, 4:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-should-be-getting-hazard-pay/76683/3 "2001-08-17T04:01:21Z")
I had always heard squirrels and other certain small furry things didn’t get rabies, but I’m not really sure where I heard that or whether it was true. Anyone know? ---
**Author:** ![Geek\_Mecha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/ecae2f/32.png) [@Geek\_Mecha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Geek_Mecha)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2001, 5:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-should-be-getting-hazard-pay/76683/4 "2001-08-17T05:04:56Z")
Well, if bats are considered small furry things, then it’s not true. (Admittedly, only a small percentage of bats carry rabies.) A speedy recovery to you and your finger, **Geobabe**. A chipmunk at a concert, huh? Heh. There’s an obvious joke there, but I won’t say it. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Geobabe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/geobabe/32/3908_2.png) [@Geobabe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Geobabe)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2001, 5:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-should-be-getting-hazard-pay/76683/5 "2001-08-17T05:13:49Z")
In the research I’ve done so far, I’ve only found reference to one documented case of a chipmunk carrying rabies, so small furry things can get it, but it’s extremely rare. And we did have the Monkees here just a few weeks ago, and the Crickets last night, but no Chipmunks thus far. Except for my friend, of course. But he wasn’t singin’ nuthin’. ---
**Author:** ![Larry\_Griffin-Kentzel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/larry_griffin-kentzel/32/14787_2.png) [@Larry\_Griffin-Kentzel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Griffin-Kentzel)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2001, 7:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-should-be-getting-hazard-pay/76683/6 "2001-08-17T07:00:32Z")
Awww, **Geobabe**. . . hope you don’t go mad! ---
**Author:** ![Dave\_Stewart](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e274bd/32.png) [@Dave\_Stewart](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dave_Stewart)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2001, 7:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-should-be-getting-hazard-pay/76683/7 "2001-08-17T07:58:25Z")
> [@](#): > > sad to say, testing for rabies will require the expiration of the poor thing, but I don’t think it was feeling too well anyway Alas, poor chipmunk. ---
**Author:** ![Chas.E](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e99b99/32.png) [@Chas.E](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chas.E)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2001, 8:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-should-be-getting-hazard-pay/76683/8 "2001-08-17T08:58:52Z")
I am at war with two chipmunks in my back yard, they always tear up my garden and eat my tomatoes. I used to keep them at bay with my kitty but she died last year and now the little critters are running rampant. I don’t want to kill them since they’re so darn cute, but I do want to shoo them away. I noticed our neighbor’s cats have been running around my backyard, and since then, no signs of chipmunks. Better they get eaten, that’s the natural order of things. But they’re probably just in hiding until my tomatoes ripen, and then they’ll be back. Damn clever little beasts. BTW, there is a national shortage of Tetanus vaccines, one of the two manufacturers stopped making it and supply is down 50%. I hear they’re rationing it at the moment, trying to keep it in stock for critical cases. I think you’d be eligible. ---
**Author:** ![slortar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/6bbea6/32.png) [@slortar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/slortar)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2001, 12:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-should-be-getting-hazard-pay/76683/9 "2001-08-17T12:55:36Z")
…and it had big…NASTY…TEETH!!! GET THE HOLY HANDGRENADE!!! ---
**Author:** ![SuaSponte](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/67e7ee/32.png) [@SuaSponte](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SuaSponte)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2001, 2:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-should-be-getting-hazard-pay/76683/10 "2001-08-17T14:56:01Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Cajun Man \* > \*\*Awww, **Geobabe**. . . hope you don’t go mad! \*\* And we would be able to tell the difference how? ::running like hell:: ---
**Author:** ![Opengrave](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/919ad9/32.png) [@Opengrave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Opengrave)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2001, 3:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-should-be-getting-hazard-pay/76683/11 "2001-08-17T15:22:21Z")
I got bitten twice by squirrels when I was a kid. Once while feeding them and once while killing them (now I have a rusted spot on my shotgun barrel from the iron in the blood oxidizing the bluing) I _learned_ you need to poke them a bit before trying to pack them in your game vest. The really sad thing is I never went to the doctor. I turned out OK though. [sub]now where did I bury those acorns?[/sub] NP: **Children of Bodom** - _Hatebreeder_ ---
**Author:** ![Finagle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/b19c9b/32.png) [@Finagle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Finagle)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2001, 3:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-should-be-getting-hazard-pay/76683/12 "2001-08-17T15:27:05Z")
I think I’ve watched enough horror movies to know that over the next few weeks, Geobabe is going to start having nightmares and waking up nekkid in trees with no memory of how she got there. People all over the park are going to be terrorized by a gigantic chipmunk that nibbles through their tents and eats all their gorp. Inevitably the army will be called out. Scully and Mulder might even make an appearance. Eventually, Warren Zevon will write a song, “Chipmunks of London”. ---
**Author:** ![Geobabe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/geobabe/32/3908_2.png) [@Geobabe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Geobabe)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2001, 3:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-should-be-getting-hazard-pay/76683/13 "2001-08-17T15:35:27Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by SuaSponte \* > \*\* > > > [@](#): > > > > \*Originally posted by Cajun Man \* > > \*\*Awww, **Geobabe**. . . hope you don’t go mad! \*\* > > And we would be able to tell the difference how? > > ::running like hell:: \*\* Well, **Sua** , I was already dating you before this happened, so I guess I see your point. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Geobabe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/geobabe/32/3908_2.png) [@Geobabe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Geobabe)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2001, 4:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-should-be-getting-hazard-pay/76683/14 "2001-08-17T16:49:07Z")
**Finagle** , you’ve inspired me. Many of these references will mean nothing to most of you, but the DC residents will probably enjoy this. _Chipmunks of Wolf Trap_ (with apologies to Warren Zevon) I saw a chipmunk with a Chinese menu in his hand Walking through the streets of Tyson’s Corner in the rain He was looking for the place called Lee Ho Fork’s For to get a big dish of beef chow mein Refrain: Ah-wooo, Chipmunks of Wolf Trap Ah-wooo (x2) You hear him howling around your ranger station Better not let him in Big donor got mutilated late last night Chipmunks of Wolf Trap again (Refrain) Hunh! He’s the hairy-handed fella Who ran amok in Vienna Lately he’s been overheard in Reston You better stay away from him He’ll rip your lungs out, Jim Hunh, I’d like to meet his tailor (Refrain) I saw Lon Chaney walking with the Secretary of the Interior Doin’ the Chipmunks of Wolf Trap I saw Lon Chaney Jr. walking with the Secretary of the Interior Doin’ the Chipmunks of Wolf Trap I saw a Chipmunk drinkin’ a pina colada at Mister Smith’s His hair was perfect Ah-wooo Chipmunks of Wolf Trap Ah-wooo Chipmunks of Wolf Trap ---
**Author:** ![screech-owl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/82dd89/32.png) [@screech-owl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/screech-owl)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2001, 5:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-should-be-getting-hazard-pay/76683/15 "2001-08-17T17:00:08Z")
Cool song. I was bitten by a screech-owl, and one of my former co-workers was bitten by a cardinal (it was trapped in her son’s outdoor toybox and when she reached in to get it out, it bit her). Ah, the joys of trying to help. ---
**Author:** ![Paul\_The\_Younger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/d9b06d/32.png) [@Paul\_The\_Younger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Paul_The_Younger)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2001, 5:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-should-be-getting-hazard-pay/76683/16 "2001-08-17T17:36:23Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by screech-owl \* > \*\*Cool song. > > I was bitten by a screech-owl, and one of my former co-workers was bitten by a cardinal (it was trapped in her son’s outdoor toybox and when she reached in to get it out, it bit her). > > Ah, the joys of trying to help. \*\* Does this mean she’ll have to change her user name to **chipmunk**? Great song, **Geo**! I lived in Arlington for four years – I don’t remember Lee Ho Forks :), but have you been to Little Vietnamese Garden in Arlington? That was one of our favorite spots (and of course Whiteys for the chicken.) ---
**Author:** ![QuickSilver](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quicksilver/32/7832_2.png) [@QuickSilver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/QuickSilver)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2001, 5:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-should-be-getting-hazard-pay/76683/17 "2001-08-17T17:36:47Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Geobabe \* > Earlier tonight, an usher came into the ranger station and said there was a chipmunk by the bathrooms that was acting strange…\ I don’t know why but the imagery of that statement just makes me chuckle. What did he mean by strange? Was the chipmunk peeking at people under stall doors? > [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Geobabe \* > It was sitting there not moving… Perhaps it was just resting. “Beautiful plumage!” > [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Geobabe \* > …and yes, sad to say, testing for rabies will require the expiration of the poor thing, but I don’t think it was feeling too well anyway… …well of course not. Not after you… > [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Geobabe \* > … threw it down on the ground in an attempt to reclaim my finger… You bully. Oh, and just out of curiousity, how many park rangers does it take to apprehend a chipmunk? 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Geobabe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/geobabe/32/3908_2.png) [@Geobabe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Geobabe)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2001, 5:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-should-be-getting-hazard-pay/76683/18 "2001-08-17T17:46:37Z")
> [@](#): > > Oh, and just out of curiousity, how many park rangers does it take to apprehend a chipmunk? Well, we thought two would be sufficient, but this one was particularly fierce. The “strange behavior” was that it was sitting on the sidewalk and didn’t move even when the usher tried to shoo it away. I thought that since it was acting so docile, I’d be able to pick it up without too much trouble, but obviously I was wrong. And yes, I know throwing it on the ground wasn’t very nice, but the damn thing had latched onto my finger and I wanted it off _tout de suite_. ---
**Author:** ![QuickSilver](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quicksilver/32/7832_2.png) [@QuickSilver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/QuickSilver)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2001, 8:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-should-be-getting-hazard-pay/76683/19 "2001-08-17T20:32:18Z")
LOL! I laugh because I did the same thing when I was about 12. Cornered a chipmunk near our camp tent and scooped him up in my hands. The little bugger clamped down on the skin between my thumb and finger and I stood there for a few moments with the thing hanging off my hand by it’s teeth. I shook my hand and it fell into the grass and scurried off. Innocent chipmunks my ass. Vicious damn critters is more like it. ---
**Author:** ![FallenAngel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/5daacb/32.png) [@FallenAngel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FallenAngel)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2001, 8:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-should-be-getting-hazard-pay/76683/20 "2001-08-17T20:32:19Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Chas.E \* > **I am at war with two chipmunks in my back yard, they always tear up my garden and eat my tomatoes. I used to keep them at bay with my kitty but she died last year and now the little critters are running rampant. I don’t want to kill them since they’re so darn cute, but I do want to shoo them away. I noticed our neighbor’s cats have been running around my backyard, and since then, no signs of chipmunks. Better they get eaten, that’s the natural order of things. But they’re probably just in hiding until my tomatoes ripen, and then they’ll be back. Damn clever little beasts.** Are you sure your name’s not Elmer? [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-should-be-getting-hazard-pay/76683.md?page=2)