# I swiftly herewith consign to the pit, the ignorant clowns who misconstrue "its" **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [July 11, 2012, 5:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-swiftly-herewith-consign-to-the-pit-the-ignorant-clowns-who-misconstrue-its/627871 "2012-07-11T05:44:38Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 14
**Author:** ![Kenm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/bc79bd/32.png) [@Kenm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kenm)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2012, 6:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-swiftly-herewith-consign-to-the-pit-the-ignorant-clowns-who-misconstrue-its/627871/261 "2012-07-14T18:56:39Z")
> [@gamerunknown](#): > > Those who can are condemned by one who chooses not to as pedants? Soitenly. Folksy. A back-slapping man of the people with three PhDs. ---
**Author:** ![Knorf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/58956e/32.png) [@Knorf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knorf)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2012, 7:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-swiftly-herewith-consign-to-the-pit-the-ignorant-clowns-who-misconstrue-its/627871/262 "2012-07-14T19:31:31Z")
> [@california\_jobcase](#): > > Close on the cousins thing- it should be\* two cousins’\*, right? There are two of them, and the shop is theirs. No, no, no. The owner’s name is Two Cousin. Some people just name their children after numbers. It happens. \>.\> ---
**Author:** ![Alessan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alessan/32/465_2.png) [@Alessan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alessan)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2012, 10:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-swiftly-herewith-consign-to-the-pit-the-ignorant-clowns-who-misconstrue-its/627871/263 "2012-07-14T22:45:46Z")
> [@california\_jobcase](#): > > Close on the cousins thing- it should be\* two cousins’\*, right? There are two of them, and the shop is theirs. “Two Cousins” - no apostrophe - would also be OK. The way you said it, it’s a store owned by a couple of cousins. My way, it’s a store by the name of Two Cousins, possibly owned by the Two Cousins Corporation LLC. What it can’t be is “Two Cousin’s”, as written, because there are no circumstances where these two words make grammatical sense together. ---
**Author:** ![Bosstone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/22d042/32.png) [@Bosstone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosstone)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2012, 1:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-swiftly-herewith-consign-to-the-pit-the-ignorant-clowns-who-misconstrue-its/627871/264 "2012-07-15T01:34:35Z")
> [@Alessan](#): > > “Two Cousins” - no apostrophe - would also be OK. > > The way you said it, it’s a store owned by a couple of cousins. My way, it’s a store by the name of Two Cousins, possibly owned by the Two Cousins Corporation LLC. What it can’t be is “Two Cousin’s”, as written, because there are no circumstances where these two words make grammatical sense together. Unless it’s owned by someone named Two Cousin, as mentioned above. Unlikely as hell, but possible. ---
**Author:** ![Darth\_Panda](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ee7513/32.png) [@Darth\_Panda](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darth_Panda)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2012, 1:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-swiftly-herewith-consign-to-the-pit-the-ignorant-clowns-who-misconstrue-its/627871/265 "2012-07-15T01:47:03Z")
I knew a girl named Thu (pronounced two/to/too). She was hot. ---
**Author:** ![Kenm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/bc79bd/32.png) [@Kenm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kenm)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2012, 1:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-swiftly-herewith-consign-to-the-pit-the-ignorant-clowns-who-misconstrue-its/627871/266 "2012-07-15T01:58:08Z")
I drove past a school a couple of hours ago. The sign says “Have a nice summer. Drive safe.” ---
**Author:** ![Knorf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/58956e/32.png) [@Knorf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knorf)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2012, 2:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-swiftly-herewith-consign-to-the-pit-the-ignorant-clowns-who-misconstrue-its/627871/267 "2012-07-15T02:53:01Z")
> [@Kenm](#): > > I drove past a school a couple of hours ago. The sign says “Have a nice summer. Drive safe.” Nothing wrong with this at all. [Cite.](http://www.merriam-webster.com/video/0030-flatadverbs.htm) ---
**Author:** ![Kenm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/bc79bd/32.png) [@Kenm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kenm)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2012, 3:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-swiftly-herewith-consign-to-the-pit-the-ignorant-clowns-who-misconstrue-its/627871/268 "2012-07-15T15:31:41Z")
> [@Knorf](#): > > Nothing wrong with this at all. > > [Cite.](http://www.merriam-webster.com/video/0030-flatadverbs.htm) The English-speaking world is sinking into barbarism. ---
**Author:** ![Inner\_Stickler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inner_stickler/32/318_2.png) [@Inner\_Stickler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inner_Stickler)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2012, 3:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-swiftly-herewith-consign-to-the-pit-the-ignorant-clowns-who-misconstrue-its/627871/269 "2012-07-15T15:58:06Z")
Yes, as everyone knows, societal concepts of etiquette and charm are inextricably linked to parts of speech. Quick, diagram a sentence and save us from the horror of going dutch on a date! ---
**Author:** ![Knorf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/58956e/32.png) [@Knorf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knorf)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2012, 3:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-swiftly-herewith-consign-to-the-pit-the-ignorant-clowns-who-misconstrue-its/627871/270 "2012-07-15T15:59:19Z")
> [@Kenm](#): > > The English-speaking world is sinking into barbarism. The use of the flat adverb in English goes back many centuries. Rolling eyes at it is the new-fangled idea. Just to be clear. ---
**Author:** ![Inner\_Stickler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inner_stickler/32/318_2.png) [@Inner\_Stickler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inner_Stickler)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2012, 4:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-swiftly-herewith-consign-to-the-pit-the-ignorant-clowns-who-misconstrue-its/627871/271 "2012-07-15T16:09:02Z")
I think prescriptivists understand on a subconscious level, even if it’s too much for them to grasp outright that the idea of language now is worse than language then logically leads to the conclusion that the best way of speaking is the first way of speaking and language has been sliding downhill ever since. (It must have started from way high up to have been degrading all this time and still be absolutely gobsmacking in its artistry.) Rather, the position of the prescriptivists seems to be that a previous era in human’s history was the golden age of literature where the written word achieved its apex and if we could only return to that period, oh, what a joy that would be! So the fact that any given construction has a long and storied history means very little to the prescriptivist because they’re focused on that golden age 75-100 years ago. ---
**Author:** ![billfish678](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7bcc69/32.png) [@billfish678](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/billfish678)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2012, 4:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-swiftly-herewith-consign-to-the-pit-the-ignorant-clowns-who-misconstrue-its/627871/272 "2012-07-15T16:52:51Z")
> [@Inner\_Stickler](#): > > (It must have started from way high up to have been degrading all this time and still be absolutely gobsmacking in its artistry.) Yep. The ancient Romans could tell someone to “get off their lawn” in a way that makes Shakespear look like illiterate wanker. ---
**Author:** ![Kenm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/bc79bd/32.png) [@Kenm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kenm)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2012, 5:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-swiftly-herewith-consign-to-the-pit-the-ignorant-clowns-who-misconstrue-its/627871/273 "2012-07-15T17:06:11Z")
> [@Knorf](#): > > The use of the flat adverb in English goes back many centuries. Rolling eyes at it is the new-fangled idea. Just to be clear. I think anyone posting in this thread would know that. Just to be clear. ---
**Author:** ![DrDeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b487fb/32.png) [@DrDeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrDeth)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2012, 6:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-swiftly-herewith-consign-to-the-pit-the-ignorant-clowns-who-misconstrue-its/627871/274 "2012-07-15T18:05:42Z")
> [@Kenm](#): > > I think anyone posting in this thread would know that. > > Just to be clear. Not the Op. ---
**Author:** ![guizot](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guizot/32/3636_2.png) [@guizot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/guizot)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2012, 6:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-swiftly-herewith-consign-to-the-pit-the-ignorant-clowns-who-misconstrue-its/627871/275 "2012-07-15T18:27:33Z")
> [@Knorf](#): > > The use of the flat adverb in English goes back many centuries. In German (the mother of English), they just flattened all the adverbs outright long ago. I guess they’re too efficient to waste time getting indignant about such things. ---
**Author:** ![Knorf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/58956e/32.png) [@Knorf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knorf)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2012, 6:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-swiftly-herewith-consign-to-the-pit-the-ignorant-clowns-who-misconstrue-its/627871/276 "2012-07-15T18:48:38Z")
> [@guizot](#): > > In German (the mother of English), they just flattened all the adverbs outright long ago. I guess they’re too efficient to waste time getting indignant about such things. More time to get good at brewing beer? ---
**Author:** ![guizot](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guizot/32/3636_2.png) [@guizot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/guizot)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2012, 7:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-swiftly-herewith-consign-to-the-pit-the-ignorant-clowns-who-misconstrue-its/627871/277 "2012-07-15T19:00:58Z")
> [@Knorf](#): > > More time to get good at brewing beer? Exactly. Think of all the good beer we could’ve brewed over the course of this thread. ---
**Author:** ![greenslime1951](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/e9bcb4/32.png) [@greenslime1951](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/greenslime1951)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2012, 7:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-swiftly-herewith-consign-to-the-pit-the-ignorant-clowns-who-misconstrue-its/627871/278 "2012-07-15T19:08:48Z")
One of the ways to cover up one’s feelings of inadequacy is to assert that whatever skills one lacks are unimportant or irrelevant. You internet kiddies don’t sound very convincing when you say that English skills are unimportant. Back in high school, you got your papers back full of marks in red ink and a big “C-” encircled also in red. You then told yourself and anyone else who would listen that your teacher was an asshole and that he was just being a nitpicking jerk. You then went off to smoke some dope. All this helped you mask your feelings of inferiority. Then, perhaps, you sought out a smart kid and beat him up. This also made you feel better. Today, nothing has changed for you. You all still assert that what you lack competence in isn’t important anyway, and then proceed to verbally beat up the person or persons who say that English language skills are, in fact, important. (It’s _such_ an internet kiddie trick to point out a _supposed_ error in one of my posts to say in effect, look, he doesn’t practice what he preaches, neener neener neener.) And by the way, kiddies: if you can’t see the long-term damage that is done to society when people can’t (or won’t) communicate clearly and effectively with one another, then you’re part of the problem. Proper English _is_ important. Following rules _is_ important. Furthermore—yes, indeed, poor English skills are signs of both ignorance and stupidity. What is far more ignorant and stupid, however, is to assert that acquiring such skills is unnecessary and/or unimportant. I do, in fact, care about this topic, but it’s important whether or not I care about it or not. Ad hominem attacks are what internet kiddies do. ---
**Author:** ![Indistinguishable](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/90ced4/32.png) [@Indistinguishable](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Indistinguishable)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2012, 7:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-swiftly-herewith-consign-to-the-pit-the-ignorant-clowns-who-misconstrue-its/627871/279 "2012-07-15T19:14:21Z")
> [@greenslime1951](#): > > You internet kiddies don’t sound very convincing when you say that English skills are unimportant. Back in high school, you got your papers back full of marks in red ink and a big “C-” encircled also in red. You then told yourself and anyone else who would listen that your teacher was an asshole and that he was just being a nitpicking jerk. You then went off to smoke some dope. All this helped you mask your feelings of inferiority. Then, perhaps, you sought out a smart kid and beat him up. This also made you feel better. This is untrue of me. It is unlikely to be true of the others here as well. > [@](#): > > I do, in fact, care about this topic, but it’s important whether or not I care about it or not. Ad hominem attacks are what internet kiddies do. The above was an ad hominem attack… > [@](#): > > And by the way, kiddies: if you can’t see the long-term damage that is done to society when people can’t (or won’t) communicate clearly and effectively with one another, then you’re part of the problem. The argument is that many of the alleged errors complained about have nothing genuinely to do with clarity and effectiveness of communication. ---
**Author:** ![billfish678](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7bcc69/32.png) [@billfish678](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/billfish678)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2012, 7:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-swiftly-herewith-consign-to-the-pit-the-ignorant-clowns-who-misconstrue-its/627871/280 "2012-07-15T19:16:16Z")
> [@greenslime1951](#): > > You internet kiddies don’t sound very convincing when you say that English skills are unimportant. Back in high school, you got your papers back full of marks in red ink and a big “C-” encircled also in red. You then told yourself and anyone else who would listen that your teacher was an asshole and that he was just being a nitpicking jerk. You then went off to smoke some dope. All this helped you mask your feelings of inferiority. Then, perhaps, you sought out a smart kid and beat him up. This also made you feel better. > . Somebody is butthurt. BTW academically back in the day (before computers and way before the net) I was a top one percenter when it came to spelling and grammar. And pretty much most other academic stuff as well. I had to know it, remember it, and use it all with my own little solitary brain with nothing but some crappy books to back me up in my times of dire need. Of course I have mostly matured since then and realized there are times when these things are important and time when…well…not so much. So, if you think its just a bunch of slackers that don’t give much of a shit about its and it’s when it comes to informal communication you are quite mistaken. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-swiftly-herewith-consign-to-the-pit-the-ignorant-clowns-who-misconstrue-its/627871.md?page=13) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-swiftly-herewith-consign-to-the-pit-the-ignorant-clowns-who-misconstrue-its/627871.md?page=15)