# I, the Teacher, Has Spoken **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [September 20, 2013, 8:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-the-teacher-has-spoken/669291 "2013-09-20T08:04:03Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![TokyoBayer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tokyobayer/32/13989_2.png) [@TokyoBayer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TokyoBayer)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2013, 7:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-the-teacher-has-spoken/669291/21 "2013-09-20T19:56:39Z")
> [@Heart\_of\_Dorkness](#): > > Full points for the story, but for the record, it’s [“I the Lord have spoken…”](http://www.kingjamesbibleonline.org/1611_Ezekiel-24-14/). You’re probably thinking of “thou hast” or “he/she hath”. Or possibly just “The lord has spoken,” which is sometimes said in church after reading of scriptures. When I wrote the OP, I couldn’t actually remember which was correct. Part of the problem is that I grew up as a Mormon. Both the Book of Mormon and other Mormon scriptures were written in pseudo Jacobean English and don’t follow the correct rules. I had googled it, and got hits for both phrases. Looking again, it seems that I was wrong. Oh well. ---
**Author:** ![TokyoBayer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tokyobayer/32/13989_2.png) [@TokyoBayer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TokyoBayer)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2013, 8:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-the-teacher-has-spoken/669291/22 "2013-09-20T20:00:54Z")
> [@want2befree](#): > > OP said she teaches teenagers, which leads me to believe she is a “standard” schoolteacher, and not an ESL teacher. > > Oh, and another questionable usage issue I found in OP’s post: > …they can’t interfere with the learning of other kids. > > learning? How about education? For the record, I’m a “he” and not a “she” and am a rather inexperienced ESL teacher. Although I’m a native English speaker, having lived abroad for 25 years, mostly in Japan and mostly speaking Japanese during that time, my English can get really bad at times. ---
**Author:** ![want2befree](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/3e96dc/32.png) [@want2befree](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/want2befree)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2013, 8:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-the-teacher-has-spoken/669291/23 "2013-09-20T20:03:36Z")
> [@TokyoBayer](#): > > For the record, I am a rather inexperienced ESL teacher. Oh, OK. My bad for ass-uming. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Dogzilla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e480ec/32.png) [@Dogzilla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dogzilla)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2013, 8:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-the-teacher-has-spoken/669291/24 "2013-09-20T20:15:15Z")
> [@Simmerdown](#): > > Should it be lightening, or lightning? [Lightening](http://ahdictionary.com/word/search.html?q=lightening) would be the process of making something lighter. “She just finished lightening her hair.” [Lightning](http://ahdictionary.com/word/search.html?q=lightning) is the stuff that comes out of the sky and scares the crap out of a room full of bored teenagers. “Thunderbolts and lightning, very, very frightening…” And it should be “I _have_ spoken.” ---
**Author:** ![Dogzilla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e480ec/32.png) [@Dogzilla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dogzilla)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2013, 8:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-the-teacher-has-spoken/669291/25 "2013-09-20T20:16:43Z")
> [@TokyoBayer](#): > > When I wrote the OP, I couldn’t actually remember which was correct. Part of the problem is that I grew up as a Mormon. Both the Book of Mormon and other Mormon scriptures were written in pseudo Jacobean English and don’t follow the correct rules. > > I had googled it, and got hits for both phrases. Looking again, it seems that I was wrong. Oh well. :smack: :: sigh :: Old Joe and his peepstones in his hat strike again! I still think this is why they use “recommend” as a noun. ---
**Author:** ![Dendarii\_Dame](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bbce88/32.png) [@Dendarii\_Dame](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dendarii_Dame)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2013, 8:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-the-teacher-has-spoken/669291/26 "2013-09-20T20:20:28Z")
> [@TokyoBayer](#): > > “In this classroom, these rules must be followed.” suddenly the lightening which had been in the distance, struck really close. The windows lit up and shook from the thunder. The class jumped. Something like this coincidence happened to me once. I spoke to a woman at work whom I didn’t know well and called her by the wrong name. I wished the ground would open up. Three seconds later, the earthquake hit… ---
**Author:** ![BigT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bigt/32/12044_2.png) [@BigT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BigT)\ **Post date:** [September 21, 2013, 3:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-the-teacher-has-spoken/669291/27 "2013-09-21T03:45:01Z")
You mean, you don’t just have a crummy name like Ignatio that you prefer to abbreviate? ---
**Author:** ![Ranger\_Jeff](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ranger_jeff/32/2065_2.png) [@Ranger\_Jeff](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ranger_Jeff)\ **Post date:** [September 21, 2013, 6:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-the-teacher-has-spoken/669291/28 "2013-09-21T06:52:59Z")
> [@Dendarii\_Dame](#): > > Something like this coincidence happened to me once. I spoke to a woman at work whom I didn’t know well and called her by the wrong name. I wished the ground would open up. > > Three seconds later, the earthquake hit… I hope you always use this power for good. Unless you want to sign up for a position in my Legion Of Evil; The Father Rapers\*. [\*](http://www.dramabutton.com/) ---
**Author:** ![JustinC](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/justinc/32/8083_2.png) [@JustinC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JustinC)\ **Post date:** [September 21, 2013, 2:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-the-teacher-has-spoken/669291/29 "2013-09-21T14:01:01Z")
> [@TokyoBayer](#): > > For the record, I’m a “he” and not a “she” and am a rather inexperienced ESL teacher. > > Although I’m a native English speaker, having lived abroad for 25 years, mostly in Japan and mostly speaking Japanese during that time, my English can get really bad at times. Easy to fix; watch English movies, read English books, listen to English radio. It’ll come back to you. Use it or lose it;) ---
**Author:** ![Becky2844](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/91b2a8/32.png) [@Becky2844](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Becky2844)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2013, 6:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-the-teacher-has-spoken/669291/30 "2013-09-22T06:37:53Z")
Aren’t those moments great? Something sort of similar happened for me. We were hosting one of our son’s strays, a guy who was supposed to be here just for a couple days. A couple weeks later, after he was using personal toiletries, not looking for a job or a more permanent place to stay, and was becoming almost demanding, we knew he had to go. I was elected to do the dirty deed. I took him out on the front porch to talk to him in private and as he realized I was throwing him out he became defensive and argumentative. Trying to retain control of the situation I told him I had already talked to the police (which I hadn’t)—and just then a cruiser came slowly down the street, something that rarely happens in this neighborhood. He went inside, got his stuff, and left. _whew_ ---
**Author:** ![Senegoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/senegoid/32/6606_2.png) [@Senegoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Senegoid)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2013, 6:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-the-teacher-has-spoken/669291/31 "2013-09-22T18:50:29Z")
> [@Dogzilla](#): > > [Lightening](http://ahdictionary.com/word/search.html?q=lightening) would be the process of making something lighter. “She just finished lightening her hair.” Well, it sounded like a rather tense situation a-brewing in the OP’s ESL class, but they all laughed at the end. So I’d say some lightening happened. And, according to Al Capp at least, it would be “has” after all. > [@Mammy Yokum](#): > > AH has spoken! ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2013, 9:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-the-teacher-has-spoken/669291/32 "2013-09-22T21:16:34Z")
I love these serendipity stories. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2013, 5:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-the-teacher-has-spoken/669291/33 "2013-09-23T05:55:19Z")
Thing is, KJV or not, and given the lousy grammar sometimes displayed by ESL “native teachers” (who, as **MrSquishy** points out, are considered qualified by dint of having a passport from an English-speaking country), the joke works for those of us who have had to explain English grammar to the ESL teacher. ---
**Author:** ![Clark\_Cello](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/58f4c7/32.png) [@Clark\_Cello](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Clark_Cello)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2013, 1:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-the-teacher-has-spoken/669291/34 "2013-09-23T13:51:03Z")
> [@want2befree](#): > > No, seriously, why does the title have incorrect grammar?? Because the subject of the sentence is “I”. The base sentence is “I have sopken”. “I has spoken” would be ungrammatical. “The Teacher” is simply a modifer of “I”, and does not impact the verb at all. ---
**Author:** ![BrianJ](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/54ee81/32.png) [@BrianJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrianJ)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2013, 4:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-the-teacher-has-spoken/669291/35 "2013-09-23T16:21:21Z")
> [@TokyoBayer](#): > > The cross one must bear to make jokes. I figured the title was meant to be funny/ironic and moved on 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Senegoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/senegoid/32/6606_2.png) [@Senegoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Senegoid)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2013, 8:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-the-teacher-has-spoken/669291/36 "2013-09-23T20:38:06Z")
> [@Clark\_Cello](#): > > Because the subject of the sentence is “I”. The base sentence is “I have sopken”. “I has spoken” would be ungrammatical. “The Teacher” is simply a modifer of “I”, and does not impact the verb at all. English verb conjugration can be diffacult and conplicated indeede. We have, for exampel, I have sopken / You (singular) han spokeo / He, she, it har spoker We ham sponkesd / You (plural) hans sopenks / They hul skoprend ---
**Author:** ![want2befree](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/3e96dc/32.png) [@want2befree](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/want2befree)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2013, 8:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-the-teacher-has-spoken/669291/37 "2013-09-23T20:50:37Z")
> [@Clark\_Cello](#): > > Because the subject of the sentence is “I”. The base sentence is “I have sopken”. “I has spoken” would be ungrammatical. “The Teacher” is simply a modifer of “I”, and does not impact the verb at all. I meant why did the teacher use incorrect grammar, but he/she has answered that. ---
**Author:** ![Clark\_Cello](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/58f4c7/32.png) [@Clark\_Cello](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Clark_Cello)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2013, 9:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-the-teacher-has-spoken/669291/38 "2013-09-23T21:40:46Z")
> [@want2befree](#): > > I meant why did the teacher use incorrect grammar, but he/she has answered that. Oh, :smack:. Sorry about that. ---
**Author:** ![purplehorseshoe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/purplehorseshoe/32/2996_2.png) [@purplehorseshoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/purplehorseshoe)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2013, 11:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-the-teacher-has-spoken/669291/39 "2013-09-23T23:02:16Z")
> [@Senegoid](#): > > English verb conjugration can be diffacult and conplicated indeede. We have, for exampel, > > I have sopken / You (singular) han spokeo / He, she, it har spoker > > We ham sponkesd / You (plural) hans sopenks / They hul skoprend Either I’m being whooshed, or you seriously need to adjust your keyboard settings. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2013, 1:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-the-teacher-has-spoken/669291/40 "2013-09-24T01:00:21Z")
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