# I think I got the strangest "pick-up" line EVER this weekend ... **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [October 20, 2009, 3:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-think-i-got-the-strangest-pick-up-line-ever-this-weekend/514482 "2009-10-20T15:09:25Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Avarie537](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/48db29/32.png) [@Avarie537](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Avarie537)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2009, 3:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-think-i-got-the-strangest-pick-up-line-ever-this-weekend/514482/1 "2009-10-20T15:09:25Z")
really. Big tall Scottish guy at a party, wearing a kilt and all that. “You know, I’m really a 567-year-old druid whose purpose in life is to worship women. When was the last time you were properly worshipped?” :eek: Second best is one my best friend got when we were in high school. “I’m a sexual energy vampire. If I don’t have sex every [X number of] days, I’ll die!” ---
**Author:** ![Translucent\_Daydream](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/translucent_daydream/32/16170_2.png) [@Translucent\_Daydream](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Translucent_Daydream)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2009, 3:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-think-i-got-the-strangest-pick-up-line-ever-this-weekend/514482/2 "2009-10-20T15:30:02Z")
The best one I heard was “I wanna knock the stuffin’ out of your dirty muffin” ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Fight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/90ced4/32.png) [@Cat\_Fight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Fight)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2009, 3:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-think-i-got-the-strangest-pick-up-line-ever-this-weekend/514482/3 "2009-10-20T15:35:58Z")
If only all men were so creative. Not that I’d take them up on those offers, but they’d certainly get a laugh rather than a snub. I might even find a nerdier friend and introduce them. ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2009, 3:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-think-i-got-the-strangest-pick-up-line-ever-this-weekend/514482/4 "2009-10-20T15:46:39Z")
A friend used this one: He was in some sort of department store and he asked a cute clerk about some luggage. “Actually, I’m 50% interested in the luggage and 80% interested in you.” ---
**Author:** ![Ferret\_Herder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e47774/32.png) [@Ferret\_Herder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ferret_Herder)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2009, 3:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-think-i-got-the-strangest-pick-up-line-ever-this-weekend/514482/5 "2009-10-20T15:53:09Z")
> [@Avarie537](#): > > really. Big tall Scottish guy at a party, wearing a kilt and all that. “You know, I’m really a 567-year-old druid whose purpose in life is to worship women. When was the last time you were properly worshipped?” That one is pretty damned cool. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![jayjay](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jayjay/32/6765_2.png) [@jayjay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jayjay)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2009, 4:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-think-i-got-the-strangest-pick-up-line-ever-this-weekend/514482/6 "2009-10-20T16:20:10Z")
> [@tdn](#): > > A friend used this one: > > He was in some sort of department store and he asked a cute clerk about some luggage. “Actually, I’m 50% interested in the luggage and 80% interested in you.” I think I’d direct him to the Early Learning aisle at that point. There have to be some really simple math books over there he can study… ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2009, 4:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-think-i-got-the-strangest-pick-up-line-ever-this-weekend/514482/7 "2009-10-20T16:32:22Z")
> [@jayjay](#): > > I think I’d direct him to the Early Learning aisle at that point. There have to be some really simple math books over there he can study… Apparently she did give him a lesson in numbers – as in which ones to dial. ---
**Author:** ![Robot\_Arm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/robot_arm/32/18280_2.png) [@Robot\_Arm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Robot_Arm)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2009, 4:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-think-i-got-the-strangest-pick-up-line-ever-this-weekend/514482/8 "2009-10-20T16:32:28Z")
> [@Cat\_Fight](#): > > If only all men were so creative. Not that I’d take them up on those offers, but they’d certainly get a laugh rather than a snub. I might even find a nerdier friend and introduce them. Hey, baby, ever had someone play the theme from _Star Wars_ on a fifteen-foot-long alpenhorn resting on your thighs?[sup]\*[/sup] Based on an actual incident. ---
**Author:** ![jayjay](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jayjay/32/6765_2.png) [@jayjay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jayjay)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2009, 4:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-think-i-got-the-strangest-pick-up-line-ever-this-weekend/514482/9 "2009-10-20T16:45:57Z")
> [@tdn](#): > > Apparently she did give him a lesson in numbers – as in which ones to dial. _shakes head_ Some girls’ standards… ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2009, 4:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-think-i-got-the-strangest-pick-up-line-ever-this-weekend/514482/10 "2009-10-20T16:48:34Z")
> [@jayjay](#): > > _shakes head_ > > Some girls’ standards… You’d have to know the guy. He’s not some slobbering moron that doesn’t understand basic math. He comes off as quite intelligent. I think that she got that he was making a joke. ---
**Author:** ![jayjay](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jayjay/32/6765_2.png) [@jayjay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jayjay)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2009, 4:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-think-i-got-the-strangest-pick-up-line-ever-this-weekend/514482/11 "2009-10-20T16:53:04Z")
> [@tdn](#): > > You’d have to know the guy. He’s not some slobbering moron that doesn’t understand basic math. He comes off as quite intelligent. > > I think that she got that he was making a joke. I forgot MY smiley on that one. Sorry! I wasn’t entirely serious. I did get that he was joking about the percentages. ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2009, 5:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-think-i-got-the-strangest-pick-up-line-ever-this-weekend/514482/12 "2009-10-20T17:02:34Z")
> [@jayjay](#): > > I forgot MY smiley on that one. Sorry! I wasn’t entirely serious. I did get that he was joking about the percentages. Ah. I’m 50% interested in this thread and 97% interested in where the “I can tell em’ but I can’t detect em’” remedial class is. ---
**Author:** ![MeanOldLady](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/meanoldlady/32/10737_2.png) [@MeanOldLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MeanOldLady)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2009, 5:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-think-i-got-the-strangest-pick-up-line-ever-this-weekend/514482/13 "2009-10-20T17:03:52Z")
When I wear glasses, I frequently get “I’ll bet you’re very pretty without your glasses.” That is not a compliment, morons! Please stop telling me this when you’re attempting to pick up on me. ---
**Author:** ![Robot\_Arm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/robot_arm/32/18280_2.png) [@Robot\_Arm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Robot_Arm)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2009, 5:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-think-i-got-the-strangest-pick-up-line-ever-this-weekend/514482/14 "2009-10-20T17:08:48Z")
> [@MeanOldLady](#): > > When I wear glasses, I frequently get “I’ll bet you’re very pretty without your glasses.” That is not a compliment, morons! Please stop telling me this when you’re attempting to pick up on me. If you’re pretty without your glasses, you’d be a knockout with them. ---
**Author:** ![pbbth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f9ae1b/32.png) [@pbbth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pbbth)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2009, 5:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-think-i-got-the-strangest-pick-up-line-ever-this-weekend/514482/15 "2009-10-20T17:18:35Z")
I think the weirdest pick up line I ever got was, “Damn girl, I could carry your ass around in a bucket!” 😕 Needless to say my ass and I stayed bucket free and well away from that weirdo. ---
**Author:** ![MeanOldLady](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/meanoldlady/32/10737_2.png) [@MeanOldLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MeanOldLady)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2009, 5:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-think-i-got-the-strangest-pick-up-line-ever-this-weekend/514482/16 "2009-10-20T17:22:05Z")
> [@Robot\_Arm](#): > > If you’re pretty without your glasses, you’d be a knockout with them. Hmm, I’ve never received the “I’ll bet you’re very pretty _with_ glasses” line. I can assure you, with or without glasses, I look pretty much exactly the same. Whether or not that is “pretty” is highly subjective. > [@pbbth](#): > > I think the weirdest pick up line I ever got was, “Damn girl, I could carry your ass around in a bucket!” > > 😕 > > Needless to say my ass and I stayed bucket free and well away from that weirdo. My all time favorite is “Damn girl, you look like you got a job.” Wtf? ---
**Author:** ![Mosier](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ea924/32.png) [@Mosier](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mosier)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2009, 5:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-think-i-got-the-strangest-pick-up-line-ever-this-weekend/514482/17 "2009-10-20T17:26:49Z")
> [@pbbth](#): > > I think the weirdest pick up line I ever got was, “Damn girl, I could carry your ass around in a bucket!” > > 😕 > > Needless to say my ass and I stayed bucket free and well away from that weirdo. Maybe he was trying to say he wanted to have your ass close to him at all times? I haven’t ever used a pickup line, but my wife gets a few when I’m not with her. I think the best one she ever told me about was a long, drawn out “Damn!” as she was walking by. I guess it wasn’t the most creative thing ever, but it got the point across. ---
**Author:** ![Ichbin\_Dubist](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/51bf81/32.png) [@Ichbin\_Dubist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ichbin_Dubist)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2009, 5:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-think-i-got-the-strangest-pick-up-line-ever-this-weekend/514482/18 "2009-10-20T17:59:00Z")
> [@MeanOldLady](#): > > My all time favorite is “Damn girl, you look like you got a job.” Wtf? Did he check your pulse right before he said it? ---
**Author:** ![jayjay](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jayjay/32/6765_2.png) [@jayjay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jayjay)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2009, 6:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-think-i-got-the-strangest-pick-up-line-ever-this-weekend/514482/19 "2009-10-20T18:07:38Z")
> [@MeanOldLady](#): > > When I wear glasses, I frequently get “I’ll bet you’re very pretty without your glasses.” That is not a compliment, morons! Please stop telling me this when you’re attempting to pick up on me. The best response to this is “I’ll bet YOU’RE good-looking without my glasses.” ---
**Author:** ![Eonwe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eonwe/32/240_2.png) [@Eonwe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eonwe)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2009, 6:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-think-i-got-the-strangest-pick-up-line-ever-this-weekend/514482/20 "2009-10-20T18:08:20Z")
> [@Translucent\_Daydream](#): > > The best one I heard was “I wanna knock the stuffin’ out of your dirty muffin” That sounds like it should be a Frank Zappa lyric. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-think-i-got-the-strangest-pick-up-line-ever-this-weekend/514482.md?page=2)