# I think I may have just accidentally ticked off a telemarketer... **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [March 9, 2005, 12:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-think-i-may-have-just-accidentally-ticked-off-a-telemarketer/293597 "2005-03-09T00:14:14Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 12\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![betenoir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/258eb7/32.png) [@betenoir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/betenoir)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2005, 4:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-think-i-may-have-just-accidentally-ticked-off-a-telemarketer/293597/21 "2005-03-09T16:29:24Z")
> [@racinchikki](#): > > I recently got a call from a guy saying he was with something (the Dove foundation, maybe?) that was helping “parents and grandparents who want to clean up the language and sexual content in today’s media.” I started giggling and said “Dude, I fuckin’ _love_ sexual content. I am totally hanging up on you now.” No, no, no. You should have agreed with them. “It’s about fucking time! The goddamn motherfuckers promoting this shit should be strung up by their balls! Sign me the fuck up!” ---
**Author:** ![Kythereia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e8c25b/32.png) [@Kythereia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kythereia)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2005, 4:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-think-i-may-have-just-accidentally-ticked-off-a-telemarketer/293597/22 "2005-03-09T16:53:12Z")
How could you, **Tengu**? How _could_ you? The horrors! The humanity! I’m so ashamed! _sniff_ ☹ 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2005, 5:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-think-i-may-have-just-accidentally-ticked-off-a-telemarketer/293597/23 "2005-03-09T17:08:29Z")
I had when, when I was about 11, call our house and get me. This is the conversation: “May I speak to your daddy?” “No, he’s in the shower.” “Well, why don’t you go and join him?” Said in the most lewd tone ever. It gave me the creeps. People are weird. ---
**Author:** ![Hypno-Toad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b2d939/32.png) [@Hypno-Toad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hypno-Toad)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2005, 5:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-think-i-may-have-just-accidentally-ticked-off-a-telemarketer/293597/24 "2005-03-09T17:19:29Z")
> [@Anaamika](#): > > I had when, when I was about 11, call our house and get me. This is the conversation: > > “May I speak to your daddy?” > “No, he’s in the shower.” > “Well, why don’t you go and join him?” Said in the most lewd tone ever. It gave me the creeps. > > People are weird. You should have said, “Because today is my brothers turn.” ---
**Author:** ![Regallag\_The\_Axe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/regallag_the_axe/32/445_2.png) [@Regallag\_The\_Axe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Regallag_The_Axe)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2005, 5:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-think-i-may-have-just-accidentally-ticked-off-a-telemarketer/293597/25 "2005-03-09T17:58:24Z")
> [@Gorsnak](#): > > They use autodialer thingies that wait until you say hello before they connect a telemarketer to the line. Makes it real easy to hang up on them before they have a chance to say anything. Yeah. That’s why I answer my phone by saying: “Kaiiiiiii?” Fuks up the auto-dailers, AND throws the telemarketers off (if they don’t use auto-dialers). ---
**Author:** ![Scott\_Plaid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/258eb7/32.png) [@Scott\_Plaid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scott_Plaid)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2005, 6:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-think-i-may-have-just-accidentally-ticked-off-a-telemarketer/293597/26 "2005-03-09T18:01:20Z")
> [@Regallag\_The\_Axe](#): > > I answer my phone by saying: “Kaiiiiiii?” ::Taking notes:: How you you pronounce that? and why that word? ---
**Author:** ![Tastes\_of\_Chocolate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tastes_of_chocolate/32/3232_2.png) [@Tastes\_of\_Chocolate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tastes_of_Chocolate)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2005, 6:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-think-i-may-have-just-accidentally-ticked-off-a-telemarketer/293597/27 "2005-03-09T18:15:47Z")
> [@Sgt.Pepper](#): > > Lately, I’ve been just picking up the phone and putting it back down when it rings. Especially the “Private Name/Number” ones. I figure if they want their privacy that bad, then I’ll take it a step further and not even allow the person to reveal who they are to me. They can remain a mystery. New message time. “We know that your privacy is important to you. In support of your wishes, we will not allow you to compromise your anonymity and we will now terminate this call.” \ ---
**Author:** ![Balle\_M](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/13edae/32.png) [@Balle\_M](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Balle_M)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2005, 6:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-think-i-may-have-just-accidentally-ticked-off-a-telemarketer/293597/28 "2005-03-09T18:28:40Z")
My favorite tactic came from our own **F\_U\_Shakespeare** … Listen to the whole spiel with obvious enthusiasm and when it comes time to yeah-or-nay the deal ask in your most excited voice, “HAVE YOU FOUND JESUS???” No matter what the answer, start witnessing. ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2005, 6:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-think-i-may-have-just-accidentally-ticked-off-a-telemarketer/293597/29 "2005-03-09T18:57:32Z")
> [@Hypno-Toad](#): > > You should have said, “Because today is my brothers turn.” OH, I wish you were around back then. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Larry\_Mudd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f14d63/32.png) [@Larry\_Mudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Mudd)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2005, 7:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-think-i-may-have-just-accidentally-ticked-off-a-telemarketer/293597/30 "2005-03-09T19:12:21Z")
My favourite technique for tormenting telemarketers used to be to feign interest in their pitch and then subtly give the impression that I was masturbating. Never anything unequivocal, which would let them off the hook – just enough to be disconcerting and make them want to end the call, in spite of the apparent interest. I wish I had recorded those. ---
**Author:** ![wasson](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/4da419/32.png) [@wasson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wasson)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2005, 7:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-think-i-may-have-just-accidentally-ticked-off-a-telemarketer/293597/31 "2005-03-09T19:30:51Z")
I was at my friends house when she received a telemarketing call. I answered, claiming I was the “she” the telemarketer was trying to reach. She seemed confused at first, but went with it. She was giving away some vacation or something, and at one point mentioned that I could take my girlfriend. I said “Girlfriend? You assume all the women you talk to are lesbians?” She seemed embarrassed and quickly apologized and hung up. ---
**Author:** ![TheEye\_sEar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ce7236/32.png) [@TheEye\_sEar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TheEye_sEar)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2005, 8:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-think-i-may-have-just-accidentally-ticked-off-a-telemarketer/293597/32 "2005-03-09T20:01:31Z")
My husband and I were housesitting for his mother while she was on a mission to Ecuador. The funniest call from a telemarketer I got came after I had been married for about 4 months. TM: Hello, this is [name] from the Illinois FOP. Is this Mrs. [MIL’s and my last name]? Me: No, she’s in Ecuador. TM: Well, may I speak with your daddy? Me: No, he’s in Kansas. TM: Are you sure? Me: Of course. TM: Riiiight… I’ll try back later. I was 19 at the time, and feeling old. I’m also 6’1" and built like a Valkyrie, so no little girl voice thing going on. I was torn between incredulity and total amusement. It was also gratifying to realize I pissed off the TM without lying or doing anything gross at all. He was the victim of his own ridiculous assumptions. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-think-i-may-have-just-accidentally-ticked-off-a-telemarketer/293597.md?page=1)