# I try to become Gay for Science. (Warning, long, Gay) **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [December 4, 2005, 4:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-try-to-become-gay-for-science-warning-long-gay/333988 "2005-12-04T04:10:06Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![swampbear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampbear/32/467_2.png) [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2005, 12:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-try-to-become-gay-for-science-warning-long-gay/333988/21 "2005-12-05T12:39:12Z")
> [@Siddhartha Vicious](#): > > Relieved that I could still maintain my messy, chubby lifestyle and still be gay, I then began the arduous task of becoming attracted to men. Don’t give up yet. I’m gettin’ a blip on my gaydar. Messy…chubby… How _YOU_ doin’? ---
**Author:** ![Quartz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quartz/32/267_2.png) [@Quartz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quartz)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2005, 12:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-try-to-become-gay-for-science-warning-long-gay/333988/22 "2005-12-05T12:39:17Z")
Brilliant! ---
**Author:** ![Dangerosa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/22d042/32.png) [@Dangerosa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dangerosa)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2005, 2:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-try-to-become-gay-for-science-warning-long-gay/333988/23 "2005-12-05T14:47:23Z")
> [@](#): > > This experiment ended quite poorly. I found myself routinely unaroused by any images I found. Naked men themselves seemed to be inadvertently hilarious to me. As a straight woman, naked men are inadverently hilarious to me. I know it isn’t the case for all straight women, some do admire the nude male form. But God, if there is one, really had a sense of humor when it came to the male form. ---
**Author:** ![Spatial\_Rift\_47](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a8b319/32.png) [@Spatial\_Rift\_47](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spatial_Rift_47)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2005, 3:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-try-to-become-gay-for-science-warning-long-gay/333988/24 "2005-12-05T15:50:21Z")
I was all set to complain about how this comes nowhere near to proving that sexual preference is innate, but then I thought, this is just too well written, and too pricelessly hilarious to deserve something like that. **Siddhartha Vicious** , congratulations. If there were a Spirit of the Straight Dope award for threads, this would win it. ---
**Author:** ![Beware\_of\_Doug](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/278dde/32.png) [@Beware\_of\_Doug](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beware_of_Doug)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2005, 3:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-try-to-become-gay-for-science-warning-long-gay/333988/25 "2005-12-05T15:52:01Z")
You can convince just about everybody and still be heterosexual as hell. Here’s how. 1. Adopt a small dog who’s no good for hunting or home protection. 2. Drink something other than beer every now and then. Mixed drinks are good. 3. Stationery with just your name, no addresses or phones or emails or anything, made of good paper. 4. Just generally pay greater attention to you appearance and the impression you make. You don’t have to be dressy or formal. Just look good to yourself, speak well, make occasional eye contact. Be yourself, with a coat of polish. 5. Have some old stuff in your life. Anything that is not a gun or sporting good. It could be a cocktail shaker, an electric clock, a watch, some 30s to 50s movies or music you like. Have it around for people to see or hear. 6. Appreciate women on a deeper level. Expand your definition of _sexy_ to include her clothes, the look in her eyes, the way she stirs her coffee…Use your imagination. ---
**Author:** ![Beware\_of\_Doug](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/278dde/32.png) [@Beware\_of\_Doug](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beware_of_Doug)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2005, 3:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-try-to-become-gay-for-science-warning-long-gay/333988/26 "2005-12-05T15:53:39Z")
Items 7 thru 10 to follow…later. ---
**Author:** ![Homebrew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/c89c15/32.png) [@Homebrew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Homebrew)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2005, 4:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-try-to-become-gay-for-science-warning-long-gay/333988/27 "2005-12-05T16:42:04Z")
#7, learn to count to 10. ---
**Author:** ![Ethilrist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ethilrist/32/4604_2.png) [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2005, 4:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-try-to-become-gay-for-science-warning-long-gay/333988/28 "2005-12-05T16:46:41Z")
Bravo! An excellent follow-up to the great response I heard to the statement that homosexuality is a choice: “Okay. Show me.” ---
**Author:** ![Ethilrist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ethilrist/32/4604_2.png) [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2005, 4:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-try-to-become-gay-for-science-warning-long-gay/333988/29 "2005-12-05T16:47:46Z")
1. It’s the new 10. Faaaaabulous! ---
**Author:** ![pravnik](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/8edcca/32.png) [@pravnik](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pravnik)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2005, 6:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-try-to-become-gay-for-science-warning-long-gay/333988/30 "2005-12-05T18:49:09Z")
I commend your sacrifices in the name of science, as well as your willingness to “take one for the team.” ---
**Author:** ![The\_Weird\_One](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/7bcc69/32.png) [@The\_Weird\_One](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Weird_One)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2005, 8:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-try-to-become-gay-for-science-warning-long-gay/333988/31 "2005-12-05T20:28:16Z")
Hilarious! But, man, I can’t help thinking that your wife missed out on a great opportunity. Had I been in her place, the conversation would’ve gone something like this: **Sid** : Honey, is it okay if I sleep with men? **WeirdO** : Only if you let me watch. _leers_ ---
**Author:** ![Hypno-Toad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b2d939/32.png) [@Hypno-Toad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hypno-Toad)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2006, 8:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-try-to-become-gay-for-science-warning-long-gay/333988/32 "2006-01-18T20:30:11Z")
> [@pravnik](#): > > I commend your sacrifices in the name of science, as well as your willingness to “take one for the team.” Shouldn’t that be: “Take one FROM the team?” ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2006, 8:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-try-to-become-gay-for-science-warning-long-gay/333988/33 "2006-01-18T20:38:26Z")
Very funny, Siddartha! Excellent post. > [@Dangerosa](#): > > As a straight woman, naked men are inadverently hilarious to me. I know it isn’t the case for all straight women, some do admire the nude male form. But God, if there is one, really had a sense of humor when it came to the male form. Yeah, I’m with you, too. And you know, men \*are \* sexy, there’s no doubt about it, and erect, not so bad, but limp? It’s giggle time. **Weird One** , me too. Or “can I join in, too? It’s all for science, right?” ---
**Author:** ![Asimovian](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/asimovian/32/172_2.png) [@Asimovian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Asimovian)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2006, 8:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-try-to-become-gay-for-science-warning-long-gay/333988/34 "2006-01-18T20:52:41Z")
> [@Anaamika](#): > > **Weird One** , me too. Or “can I join in, too? It’s all for science, right?” As many times as I’ve offered Jakeline the opportunity to sleep with another woman so long as I had the opportunity to watch and/or film the event, I don’t think she has that same interest in return. In fact, she’s prone to giving me odd and disturbed looks whenever I comment that I imagine one of our friend’s beards would feel “hawt” on my skin. Maybe I’m just approaching her with this the wrong way, though… One more vote for this being a superb post, by the way! ---
**Author:** ![Draelin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ce73a5/32.png) [@Draelin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Draelin)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2006, 8:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-try-to-become-gay-for-science-warning-long-gay/333988/35 "2006-01-18T20:57:12Z")
**Siddartha** , I applaud your efforts in the name of science, but I have one more experiment for you to consider … get drunk. As a heterosexual female, I can appreciate the beauty of other women and even find them sexy. But give me a few shots of tequila, and _hoo_ boy. I suggest you go get plastered at a gay leather bar and then report back. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![jjimm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba8739/32.png) [@jjimm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jjimm)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2006, 9:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-try-to-become-gay-for-science-warning-long-gay/333988/36 "2006-01-18T21:08:15Z")
Best post for a very long time. ---
**Author:** ![Excalibre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/898d66/32.png) [@Excalibre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Excalibre)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2006, 10:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-try-to-become-gay-for-science-warning-long-gay/333988/37 "2006-01-18T22:54:18Z")
Brilliant work, **Siddhartha**. ---
**Author:** ![some\_white\_dude](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b487fb/32.png) [@some\_white\_dude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/some_white_dude)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2006, 11:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-try-to-become-gay-for-science-warning-long-gay/333988/38 "2006-01-18T23:08:47Z")
> [@Hypno-Toad](#): > > Shouldn’t that be: “Take one FROM the team?” Did it take you a month and a half to think of that one? 😃 Seriously, though, thanks for bumping this one. I dunno how I missed it before. Great post, **Siddhartha**. ---
**Author:** ![mojave66](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/5f9b8f/32.png) [@mojave66](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mojave66)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2006, 3:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-try-to-become-gay-for-science-warning-long-gay/333988/39 "2006-01-19T03:02:42Z")
Brilliant. Just incredibly brilliant. ---
**Author:** ![Amazon\_Floozy\_Goddess](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/779978/32.png) [@Amazon\_Floozy\_Goddess](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Amazon_Floozy_Goddess)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2006, 3:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-try-to-become-gay-for-science-warning-long-gay/333988/40 "2006-01-19T03:40:17Z")
That was awesome. I laughed so hard I have a headache now. But the pain was worth the funny! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-try-to-become-gay-for-science-warning-long-gay/333988.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-try-to-become-gay-for-science-warning-long-gay/333988.md?page=3)