# I Walked Out On My Job Today **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [July 22, 2009, 11:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-walked-out-on-my-job-today/503928 "2009-07-22T23:07:40Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![DrDeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b487fb/32.png) [@DrDeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrDeth)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2009, 5:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-walked-out-on-my-job-today/503928/61 "2009-07-24T05:40:36Z")
> [@Alice\_The\_Goon](#): > > Nah, no worries there. Their policy is never to say anything about an employee except to confirm the dates of hire and termination. Besides, I do good work, and I know that they can’t even lie about that. We all know I’m good at what I do. They can say you walked off with no notice. Employers do not like that. ---
**Author:** ![Risha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/5fc32e/32.png) [@Risha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Risha)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2009, 6:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-walked-out-on-my-job-today/503928/62 "2009-07-24T06:14:58Z")
> [@DrDeth](#): > > They can say you walked off with no notice. Employers do not like that. I really, really doubt that they’ll do even that. All the sources I’ve seen are in agreement that these days, many (most?) employers will not say one negative word about any ex-employee, and even say that straight out as a stated policy. I guess they’ve been sued into submission? ---
**Author:** ![EvilTOJ](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ee59a6/32.png) [@EvilTOJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EvilTOJ)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2009, 9:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-walked-out-on-my-job-today/503928/63 "2009-07-24T09:17:02Z")
I envy you **Alice.** While I don’t have dramabombs to worry about, I despise everything about my job except the pay, and canNOT wait to finally leave this shithole. ---
**Author:** ![Kalhoun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/3bc359/32.png) [@Kalhoun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kalhoun)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2009, 1:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-walked-out-on-my-job-today/503928/64 "2009-07-24T13:22:18Z")
> [@Alice\_The\_Goon](#): > > Thanks, everyone! I really, really appreciate the support and comments. My husband’s boss called him for a week after the dramatic exit, and he wouldn’t even take their calls. It was beautiful. No discussion, no nothing. They offered to overlook the “quit” and he asked me if I wanted him to go back. The way I see it, if you’re that unhappy that you walk out, going back would last about half a day before you remember why you left in the first place, so why bother? We are both more than happy with the decision. ---
**Author:** ![DrDeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b487fb/32.png) [@DrDeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrDeth)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2009, 4:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-walked-out-on-my-job-today/503928/65 "2009-07-24T16:47:32Z")
> [@Risha](#): > > I really, really doubt that they’ll do even that. All the sources I’ve seen are in agreement that these days, many (most?) employers will not say one negative word about any ex-employee, and even say that straight out as a stated policy. I guess they’ve been sued into submission? Officially, you’re right. All they will say is the method of termination (which in this case is “resigned without notice” which doesn;t sound good). But there’s a network of people in any profession, and someone will call a colleague there and get the dirt “off the record”. ---
**Author:** ![FoieGrasIsEvil](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/foiegrasisevil/32/16638_2.png) [@FoieGrasIsEvil](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FoieGrasIsEvil)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2009, 12:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-walked-out-on-my-job-today/503928/66 "2009-07-25T00:13:32Z")
> [@Risha](#): > > I really, really doubt that they’ll do even that. All the sources I’ve seen are in agreement that these days, many (most?) employers will not say one negative word about any ex-employee, and even say that straight out as a stated policy. I guess they’ve been sued into submission? I think you are still able to answer the question “Would you rehire this person?”. ---
**Author:** ![Alice\_The\_Goon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ed8c4c/32.png) [@Alice\_The\_Goon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alice_The_Goon)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2009, 12:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-walked-out-on-my-job-today/503928/67 "2009-07-25T00:24:24Z")
> [@FoieGrasIsEvil](#): > > I think you are still able to answer the question “Would you rehire this person?”. I’ve had this discussion with my direct supervisor at least a couple of times, just while chatting. She has said that they say no about everyone, because they never rehire anyone, ever. I even once jokingly suggested that they could say, “You’ll be lucky to get him to work for you” and leave it up to the inquirer to interpret that, but no, they won’t ever say anything bad about a former employee- they’re very lawsuit-aware when it comes to that. ---
**Author:** ![Alice\_The\_Goon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ed8c4c/32.png) [@Alice\_The\_Goon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alice_The_Goon)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2009, 12:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-walked-out-on-my-job-today/503928/68 "2009-07-25T00:28:41Z")
I got the paperwork for UI today. Apparently you have a good shot of getting it even if you quit, if your doctor makes a statement that it would have been harmful to your nervous health or something like that for you to continue there. I have seen my doctor for anxiety several times in the last few months, and I did mention my workplace as a major stressor for me. I’ll pay him a visit next week and see what he thinks. ---
**Author:** ![FoieGrasIsEvil](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/foiegrasisevil/32/16638_2.png) [@FoieGrasIsEvil](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FoieGrasIsEvil)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2009, 1:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-walked-out-on-my-job-today/503928/69 "2009-07-25T01:01:28Z")
> [@Alice\_The\_Goon](#): > > I got the paperwork for UI today. Apparently you have a good shot of getting it even if you quit, if your doctor makes a statement that it would have been harmful to your nervous health or something like that for you to continue there. I have seen my doctor for anxiety several times in the last few months, and I did mention my workplace as a major stressor for me. I’ll pay him a visit next week and see what he thinks. **Alice** , did you work in a cancer treatment clinic? If so (even if it’s a mundane skin-cancer/plastic surgery joint) I find the level of unprofessionalism in your OP appalling. Cancer patients are PEOPLE, and deserve the care they are paying for, and behind the scenes quibbles over favoritism just aren’t kosher. ---
**Author:** ![Alice\_The\_Goon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ed8c4c/32.png) [@Alice\_The\_Goon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alice_The_Goon)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2009, 1:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-walked-out-on-my-job-today/503928/70 "2009-07-25T01:38:45Z")
> [@FoieGrasIsEvil](#): > > **Alice** , did you work in a cancer treatment clinic? If so (even if it’s a mundane skin-cancer/plastic surgery joint) I find the level of unprofessionalism in your OP appalling. Cancer patients are PEOPLE, and deserve the care they are paying for, and behind the scenes quibbles over favoritism just aren’t kosher. Dermatologists. I, too, found the unprofessionalism appalling. I remarked on it many times over the time I was there, foolishly. I wasn’t the only one who noticed, but I was the only one who ever complained about it- the rest knew it wouldn’t do any good. Not only my complaints about the behavior never do any good, but they branded me a troublemaker by management for complaining. My feelings about the favoritism and weirdness was well-known. But now it seems that my documentation (meetings with management) of the stress I was feeling there will come in very handy. I’ve worked at a few offices, though, and this type of environment is pretty common. With me, it usually seems to go like this: I start at a new place, where there is a lead MA that’s long established, and then her right-hand woman, her number 2, her lady-in-waiting. The lead MA is usually very secure in her own position- she doesn’t feel like I’m a threat to her- but the second and I never get along. I possess an intelligence and leadership ability that is not very common in my field, which is a job that could basically be performed by a trained monkey, and some other women I work with really don’t like that. Thus begins a campaign of inappropriateness until one of us has had enough, usually me, for as tough and strong as I appear to be, I’m actually very sensitive and can only take so much. This time, I’m going to look for a lead MA position- it’s time for me to take that step in my career, anyway. ---
**Author:** ![Nutty\_Bunny](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/d07c76/32.png) [@Nutty\_Bunny](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nutty_Bunny)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2009, 1:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-walked-out-on-my-job-today/503928/71 "2009-07-25T01:39:35Z")
> [@DrDeth](#): > > Officially, you’re right. All they will say is the method of termination (which in this case is “resigned without notice” which doesn;t sound good). But there’s a network of people in any profession, and someone will call a colleague there and get the dirt “off the record”. I work in the HVAC industry and was up against this very thing. As the acting HR/Office Manager/Bookkeeper I wasn’t allowed to answer anything but dates of employment, but they potential employer was a company that did subcontractor work for us and vice versa, so even though he didn’t get the info from me, he ended up calling one of the owners. I would think it would be hard to prove that you didn’t get a job because a former employer bad-mouthed you. The former employee in question was stealing copper from us. It would have created some bad blood between the companies if he ended up stealing from the other company too. And UI would be very difficult to get (unless the doctor angle works for you). Granted, labor boards usually rule in favor of the employee, but walking off a job probably doesn’t bode well for your outcome. With that said, GOOD FOR YOU!!! I did something similar when I was working a measly retail job and despite feeling panicked at not having a job, it was time to go. And I learned a valuable lesson that day at the tender age of 21. Upper management will always side with the middle manager (or his buddies or his mistress or his “pets”, etc), no matter who is in the right. Fuck em! You’re better off. ---
**Author:** ![FoieGrasIsEvil](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/foiegrasisevil/32/16638_2.png) [@FoieGrasIsEvil](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FoieGrasIsEvil)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2009, 2:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-walked-out-on-my-job-today/503928/72 "2009-07-25T02:56:57Z")
> [@Alice\_The\_Goon](#): > > Dermatologists. I, too, found the unprofessionalism appalling. I remarked on it many times over the time I was there, foolishly. I wasn’t the only one who noticed, but I was the only one who ever complained about it- the rest knew it wouldn’t do any good. Not only my complaints about the behavior never do any good, but they branded me a troublemaker by management for complaining. My feelings about the favoritism and weirdness was well-known. But now it seems that my documentation (meetings with management) of the stress I was feeling there will come in very handy. > > I’ve worked at a few offices, though, and this type of environment is pretty common. With me, it usually seems to go like this: I start at a new place, where there is a lead MA that’s long established, and then her right-hand woman, her number 2, her lady-in-waiting. The lead MA is usually very secure in her own position- she doesn’t feel like I’m a threat to her- but the second and I never get along. I possess an intelligence and leadership ability that is not very common in my field, which is a job that could basically be performed by a trained monkey, and some other women I work with really don’t like that. Thus begins a campaign of inappropriateness until one of us has had enough, usually me, for as tough and strong as I appear to be, I’m actually very sensitive and can only take so much. This time, I’m going to look for a lead MA position- it’s time for me to take that step in my career, anyway. It sounds like the “second fiddle” role isn’t going to suit you anymore, and if that’s the case, may you latch on within your experience and find your own niche in the dermatology demense and prove your worth to a doctor. Good luck to you. To me, these kinds of “behind the scenes” shenanigans seem so petty and unprofessional in an arena of care that should in fact pride itself on professionalism. Land on your feet! ---
**Author:** ![kittenblue](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ba8739/32.png) [@kittenblue](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kittenblue)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2009, 2:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-walked-out-on-my-job-today/503928/73 "2009-07-25T02:57:11Z")
While I’m glad you feel good about your decision, I’m wondering two things…do they really know that you’ve quit? You say you just said Bye and walked out…maybe they think you just decided to go off sick for the day. Did you turn in your passcards and badges and keys and clean out your locker? Did you say…I quit? And you mention that this has been a pattern in previous jobs. As much as I enjoy your posts here, I wonder if you have examined your own behavior and patterns in an attempt to make your next work experience better? While your description of the Princess’s behavior is obviously inappropriate for the workplace, you also need to see how your behavior (not your work ethic, I’m not questioning that) contributes to the problem. If it happens everytime…YOU are the constant. I’ve only worked a few jobs in my life, but after getting fired from my last job, I did a lot of soul-searching and looking at my OWN attitudes and behaviors to see how I could improve future situations. I hope you find a new and better job real soon… ---
**Author:** ![Alice\_The\_Goon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ed8c4c/32.png) [@Alice\_The\_Goon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alice_The_Goon)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2009, 3:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-walked-out-on-my-job-today/503928/74 "2009-07-25T03:11:49Z")
I have definitely thought long and hard about this problem that seems to be a pattern- and while I do have a somewhat strong personality that not everyone is amenable to, I really think that most of it is that I’m smart. I’m not a genius or anything, but I think a lot of Dopers can safely say that they’re smarter than the average bear. And in a lot of workplaces, it’s not easy being an intelligent, strong woman- especially in my field, which tends to employ a lot of former stay-at-home moms with a little training, not necessarily the best and the brightest. I do have a tendency to blow in and prove myself quickly- I’m not an insecure person’s best friend. Hence my plan to go in as a lead already, if I can find the right position. Either that or a one-doctor office where it’s just me, the doctor, and a little old lady at the front desk that never says anything. Ha! Wish me luck! No, I did not say I quit. I figured it was assumed. ---
**Author:** ![Heffalump\_and\_Roo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/heffalump_and_roo/32/7691_2.png) [@Heffalump\_and\_Roo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Heffalump_and_Roo)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2009, 5:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-walked-out-on-my-job-today/503928/75 "2009-07-25T05:44:00Z")
> [@Alice\_The\_Goon](#): > > Just in case. I’m pretty confident I’ll find a job quick, but you never know. What if I have bad breath and don’t know it? What if my car breaks down next week and I have to take the bus to interviews and so I get there all hot and sweaty and make a bad impression? What if I take a nasty fall down the stairs tomorrow and am unable to job search for a month? You never know- it’s good to have something on the back burner anyway, right? Hopefully, none of those things will happen and you’ll get a better job soon. Good luck! ---
**Author:** ![MsRobyn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/90ced4/32.png) [@MsRobyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MsRobyn)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2009, 10:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-walked-out-on-my-job-today/503928/76 "2009-07-25T10:00:07Z")
Have you thought about further training, maybe in nursing? It sounds like you’re a lot smarter than your job calls for. IME (and I’m not saying this is _your_ experience), when I’ve worked in those kinds of jobs, I end up getting bored and start finding fault to the point where I quit because I’m bored and frustrated and pissed off. Just sayin’. ---
**Author:** ![Bites\_When\_Provoked](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bites_when_provoked/32/18073_2.png) [@Bites\_When\_Provoked](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bites_When_Provoked)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2009, 12:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-walked-out-on-my-job-today/503928/77 "2009-07-25T12:55:59Z")
Best of luck, Alice! I second/third/twentyfifth the folks in this thread who have been there, done that, and never regretted walking. Life’s just too short to work in a toxic environment! ---
**Author:** ![Alice\_The\_Goon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ed8c4c/32.png) [@Alice\_The\_Goon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alice_The_Goon)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2009, 6:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-walked-out-on-my-job-today/503928/78 "2009-07-25T18:45:52Z")
Well, I have spent a lot of time the past few days thinking about the situation and processing it and asking myself a lot of questions and figuring things out. I’m very shocked at myself for walking out like that, after over 5 years at this place, and with all the emotional bonds and ties I have there. It’s not like me to do that, just up and leave somewhere. I hate change, and quite frankly, often have to be _dragged_ out of familiarity kicking and screaming. I have been feeling a lot of guilt over it and shame for being voluntarily unemployed at a time when so many would cut off their pinky finger for a good, stable job like I had. But, I just figured out why I walked out and why I couldn’t go back. It wasn’t really the Princess that pushed me over the edge, or the general atmosphere of the place with all the bullshit and the this and the that. It was the moment when the fucking secretary came up to me and wiped away 5 years that I have spent building up a dignified, responsible reputation. She came up to me, in front of other people, and scrunched up her face and fists, and I felt, verbally assaulted me. A secretary! That threw some kind of switch of me that said, “Oh, no she di’nt”, and I just felt so humiliated. When I think about that scene now, I start crying. I feel like my basic human dignity has been violated. I guess I’m being a drama queen. I’m going to talk to my doctor next week. ---
**Author:** ![Alice\_The\_Goon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ed8c4c/32.png) [@Alice\_The\_Goon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alice_The_Goon)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2009, 1:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-walked-out-on-my-job-today/503928/79 "2009-08-04T01:57:37Z")
Update: Well, it’s been more than a week, almost 2 weeks. I spent a lot of time (more than I’d planned) resting (wallowing in self-pity for not having a job) and didn’t really hit the pavement real hard. But I did fax my resume last week to a healthcare staffing place, interviewed with them last week, and they are sending me tomorrow to an interview at a derm office. I think this one is a lot more frou-frou than my old place, focusing much more on the cosmetic side of derm. I looked at their website, and they even have one of those concierge services, where if you pay them $10,000 then for one year you’re entitled to special treatment and discounts. They should be able to pay me well, then. Wish me luck! And BTW, the staffing agency chick told me that my old office had _nothing_ but good things to say about me, and my work. Whew! ---
**Author:** ![Shot\_From\_Guns](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ccd318/32.png) [@Shot\_From\_Guns](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shot_From_Guns)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2009, 3:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-walked-out-on-my-job-today/503928/80 "2009-08-04T15:46:53Z")
Best of luck! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-walked-out-on-my-job-today/503928.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-walked-out-on-my-job-today/503928.md?page=5)