# I want you to hit me as hard as you can!!! **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [May 8, 2001, 9:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-want-you-to-hit-me-as-hard-as-you-can/64743 "2001-05-08T09:35:49Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 8\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Daemon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/c6cbf5/32.png) [@Daemon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Daemon)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2001, 9:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-want-you-to-hit-me-as-hard-as-you-can/64743/1 "2001-05-08T09:35:49Z")
Better if a mod/admin does it, but any doper will do… ---
**Author:** ![Eutychus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/a3d4f5/32.png) [@Eutychus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eutychus)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2001, 9:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-want-you-to-hit-me-as-hard-as-you-can/64743/2 "2001-05-08T09:45:10Z")
Like it’s worth my time. ---
**Author:** ![Snooooopy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ee7513/32.png) [@Snooooopy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snooooopy)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2001, 9:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-want-you-to-hit-me-as-hard-as-you-can/64743/3 "2001-05-08T09:48:33Z")
**WHAAAAAAAM!!!** ---
**Author:** ![Montfort](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d6d6ee/32.png) [@Montfort](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Montfort)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2001, 1:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-want-you-to-hit-me-as-hard-as-you-can/64743/4 "2001-05-08T13:33:38Z")
The first rule of the SDMB is don’t be a jerk. The second rule of the SDMB is don’t be a jerk. The third rule of the SDMB is if it’s your first time here, you must post. The fourth rule of the SDMB is no shirts, no shoes, and no underwear. (Anyone wanna help me finish this?) ---
**Author:** ![Skelji](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b38774/32.png) [@Skelji](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skelji)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2001, 1:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-want-you-to-hit-me-as-hard-as-you-can/64743/5 "2001-05-08T13:42:14Z")
Fwap! 5 of clubs. That gives you 18. Would you like another card? ---
**Author:** ![Dragwyr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dragwyr/32/2855_2.png) [@Dragwyr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dragwyr)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2001, 2:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-want-you-to-hit-me-as-hard-as-you-can/64743/6 "2001-05-08T14:15:11Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Montfort \* > \*\*The first rule of the SDMB is don’t be a jerk. > > The second rule of the SDMB is don’t be a jerk. > > The third rule of the SDMB is if it’s your first time here, you must post. > > The fourth rule of the SDMB is no shirts, no shoes, and no underwear. > > (Anyone wanna help me finish this?) \*\* The fifth rule of the SDMB is that groveling won’t get you anywhere with the mods (but it doesn’t hurt to try). ---
**Author:** ![mrblue92](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/5daacb/32.png) [@mrblue92](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mrblue92)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2001, 3:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-want-you-to-hit-me-as-hard-as-you-can/64743/7 "2001-05-08T15:01:39Z")
Wait a second–your third rule should be the eighth rule… This needs organization. It should look something like this: The first rule of the SDMB is don’t be a jerk. The second rule of the SDMB is don’t be a jerk. The third rule of the SDMB is no shirts, no shoes, and no underwear. The fourth rule of the SDMB is that groveling won’t get you anywhere with the mods (but it doesn’t hurt to try). The fifth rule: if the original poster taps out or goes limp, the thread is over. The sixth rule: you can only post something to a thread once. Seventh rule: only one thread at a time, fellas (no cross-posting). And the eight rule of the SDMB is if it’s your first time here… you have to post. ---
**Author:** ![Ethilrist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ethilrist/32/4604_2.png) [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2001, 3:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-want-you-to-hit-me-as-hard-as-you-can/64743/8 "2001-05-08T15:06:52Z")
No, no, no! The third rule is Hi, Opal! Not that I’m complaining or anything, but (wham!) why are we doing this?