# I was a longtime fan of The Onion **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [September 4, 2020, 7:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-was-a-longtime-fan-of-the-onion/919838 "2020-09-04T19:19:21Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![2\_More\_Bits](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/2_more_bits/32/4148_2.png) [@2\_More\_Bits](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/2_More_Bits)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2020, 7:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-was-a-longtime-fan-of-the-onion/919838/1 "2020-09-04T19:19:21Z")
…until so much of the “real” news became “Oniony.” Do you still read it? [In case you know not what I refer to, here’s today’s [“paper.”](https://www.theonion.com/)] ---
**Author:** ![pullin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c57346/32.png) [@pullin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pullin)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2020, 7:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-was-a-longtime-fan-of-the-onion/919838/2 "2020-09-04T19:25:48Z")
Sometimes, but I swear the Onion and sometimes Babylon Bee are more accurate than the news. ---
**Author:** ![Tripler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripler/32/21807_2.png) [@Tripler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tripler)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2020, 7:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-was-a-longtime-fan-of-the-onion/919838/3 "2020-09-04T19:28:34Z")
I remember reading The Onion back in college, and still refer to some of their older articles; for example, I tell colleagues that I was part of the “[Very Special Forces](https://politics.theonion.com/clinton-deploys-very-special-forces-to-iraq-1819565019)” before coming onboard, and I deployed “on the short C-130.” Admittedly, I haven’t read the paper in awhile since the world went to hell in a handbasket. Tripler Pizza parties on Friday are the best. ---
**Author:** ![2\_More\_Bits](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/2_more_bits/32/4148_2.png) [@2\_More\_Bits](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/2_More_Bits)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2020, 8:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-was-a-longtime-fan-of-the-onion/919838/4 "2020-09-04T20:27:52Z")
This should be in Cafe Society. Whoops! ---
**Author:** ![Freddy\_the\_Pig](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/a587f6/32.png) [@Freddy\_the\_Pig](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freddy_the_Pig)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2020, 9:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-was-a-longtime-fan-of-the-onion/919838/5 "2020-09-04T21:28:22Z")
I still read The Onion, but I do feel like something was lost when they gave in to modern attention spans and stopped running anything longer than a paragraph. I miss the long articles and opinion pieces that had time to work variations on a theme. Now it’s all just hit-and-run and smash-and-grab. ---
**Author:** ![Iggy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/iggy/32/3364_2.png) [@Iggy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Iggy)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2020, 11:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-was-a-longtime-fan-of-the-onion/919838/6 "2020-09-04T23:23:09Z")
I was a major fan back in my college days. The Onion started out of Madison, WI a year before I started university there. I remember classic headlines such as " Emperor of Saturn to Enslave Us All" or the post 9/11 headline “Holy Fucking Shit - Attack on America” which brought a touch of humor to a trying time. I haven’t regularly read it in years but find the humor often a overshadowed by reality which has grown even stranger than anything The Onion’s writers could dream up. ---
**Author:** ![Wesley\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wesley_clark/32/20581_2.png) [@Wesley\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wesley_Clark)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2020, 12:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-was-a-longtime-fan-of-the-onion/919838/7 "2020-09-05T00:12:21Z")
Shit, I didn’t even notice they did that. I read the onion somewhat and noticed there aren’t long articles but I didn’t know they got rid of them totally. That sucks. ---
**Author:** ![HMS\_Irruncible](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hms_irruncible/32/7394_2.png) [@HMS\_Irruncible](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HMS_Irruncible)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2020, 12:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-was-a-longtime-fan-of-the-onion/919838/8 "2020-09-05T00:14:34Z")
lol I wish I’d heard this one when I was in the Army ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2020, 1:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-was-a-longtime-fan-of-the-onion/919838/9 "2020-09-05T13:01:01Z")
> [@2\_More\_Bits](#): > > This should be in Cafe Society. Whoops! Reported for ~~forum~~ category change. FYI, you can do that yourself in Discourse. At the lower right of your OP next to the reply button is a 3-dots icon. Click that then click the flag icon that appears. Select the bottom-most option and tell the nice mod what you want done. ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2020, 1:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-was-a-longtime-fan-of-the-onion/919838/10 "2020-09-05T13:04:51Z")
I was never a regular Onion reader but always enjoyed their humor. But yeah, nowadays the real world is crazier than the Onion world of a few years ago. Which makes reading over-the-top satire just too scary. ---
**Author:** ![What\_Exit](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/what_exit/32/10652_2.png) [@What\_Exit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/What_Exit)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2020, 1:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-was-a-longtime-fan-of-the-onion/919838/11 "2020-09-05T13:05:03Z")
Moved as requested. ---
**Author:** ![Mahaloth](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mahaloth/32/1079_2.png) [@Mahaloth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mahaloth)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2020, 2:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-was-a-longtime-fan-of-the-onion/919838/12 "2020-09-05T14:05:26Z")
I still check in all the time. I find the scathing headlines to be hilarious. ---
**Author:** ![echoreply](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/echoreply/32/3641_2.png) [@echoreply](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/echoreply)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2020, 12:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-was-a-longtime-fan-of-the-onion/919838/13 "2020-09-06T00:48:01Z")
> [@Iggy](#): > > the post 9/11 headline “Holy Fucking Shit - Attack on America” which brought a touch of humor to a trying time I still believe The Onions 9/11 coverage was better than any of the major news organizations. [Not Knowing What Else To Do, Woman Bakes American-Flag Cake](https://local.theonion.com/not-knowing-what-else-to-do-woman-bakes-american-flag-1819566173) captured the feeling in the days after better than I think anything else. > Mixing the cake and placing it in the oven shortly after 3 p.m., Pearson sat at the kitchen table and stared at the oven door until the timer rang 50 minutes later. I used to grab a paper copy of The Onion when out with friends, and we’d read through it over lunch or drinks. If there was something interesting in the AV Club, maybe it would even come home, instead of going back on the stack on the way out. Then it went online only, and bringing up an article on your phone to share over lunch just isn’t quite the same. Now, maybe I’ll read something if a link to an article comes through one of the social media or forums that I read, but otherwise, I don’t seek it out. I am pleased to see they’re still using the same photos for the America’s Voices section. ---
**Author:** ![Paul\_was\_in\_Saudi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/b77776/32.png) [@Paul\_was\_in\_Saudi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Paul_was_in_Saudi)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2020, 12:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-was-a-longtime-fan-of-the-onion/919838/14 "2020-09-06T00:54:31Z")
Are you famliar with the [Duffel Blag blog?](https://www.duffelblog.com). It is the Onion for military news. ---
**Author:** ![Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mean_mr.mustard/32/3865_2.png) [@Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mean_Mr.Mustard)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2020, 11:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-was-a-longtime-fan-of-the-onion/919838/15 "2020-09-06T11:44:09Z")
I still look at it every 3-4 days or so, it still makes me laugh; often, just the headlines. But I still mourn the old Onion. It switched formats a few years back - didn’t it completely update once a week then rather than today’s dribs and drabs of updates? And, as mentioned, it now seems geared toward those who can’t be bothered to read anything that contains paragraphs. mmm ---
**Author:** ![Pantastic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/3bc359/32.png) [@Pantastic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pantastic)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2020, 3:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-was-a-longtime-fan-of-the-onion/919838/16 "2020-09-06T15:55:36Z")
I’m the same way, I liked their longer news stories and ‘full issue’ format, now that they’ve changed to only short stories and sporadic updates they’re not bad, but I don’t seek them out specifically like I used to. Also while they’ve stayed about the same, the world has gotten absurd enough that their articles seem less absurd, like when they ran "I got toilet bowl cleaner, carpet cleaner, Swiffer WetJet refills — you name it — just so me and my family will be ready if the president announces one of these things can treat Chinese virus. You never know what might work in a pinch!” about a month before Trump recommended injecting bleach. I think their 9/11 related articles were absolutely amazing, they really captured the mood at the time. The woman baking an American flag cake wasn’t someone we were laughing at for being absurd, everyone not quite sure exactly what to do but feeling like they should do something sympathized with her. It is too bad that a title they’ve mentioned in interviews didn’t actually get used since they thought it was too much, “America Stronger Than Ever Says Quadragon Officials.” ---
**Author:** ![DPRK](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/4491bb/32.png) [@DPRK](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DPRK)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2020, 4:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-was-a-longtime-fan-of-the-onion/919838/17 "2020-09-06T16:43:02Z")
Passersby were amazed by the unusually large amounts of blood. Passersby were amazed by the unusually large amounts of blood. Passersby were amazed by the unusually large amounts of blood. Passersby were amazed by the unusually large amounts of blood. Passersby were amazed by the unusually large amounts of blood. Passersby were amazed by the unusually large amounts of blood. Passersby were amazed by the unusually large amounts of blood. Passersby were amazed by the unusually large amounts of blood. ---
**Author:** ![Hatchie](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hatchie/32/3983_2.png) [@Hatchie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hatchie)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2020, 4:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-was-a-longtime-fan-of-the-onion/919838/18 "2020-09-06T16:51:14Z")
> [@What\_Exit](#): > > Moved as requested. Oh boy, New Moderator on the case. Is this your first? ---
**Author:** ![What\_Exit](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/what_exit/32/10652_2.png) [@What\_Exit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/What_Exit)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2020, 4:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-was-a-longtime-fan-of-the-onion/919838/19 "2020-09-06T16:55:07Z")
Maybe, not sure. ---
**Author:** ![Asuka](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/dec6dc/32.png) [@Asuka](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Asuka)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2020, 10:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-was-a-longtime-fan-of-the-onion/919838/20 "2020-09-06T22:12:07Z")
People have been claiming the Onion “hasn’t been as funny now that real news is better satire” since the mid-00s. Trump hadn’t ruined the Onion as the Onion had already been ruined far before him. And anyone who blames the current reality for making “satire obsolete” almost always had terrible taste in satire, much like when every single political website from Huffington Post to Slate had their own shitty “Satire News” sections that were almost always painful to read since they were so obvious. Duffelblog is the only real witty and funny non-Onion satire site out there. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-was-a-longtime-fan-of-the-onion/919838.md?page=2)