# I was addicted to escorts - ask me anything **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [March 27, 2018, 8:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-was-addicted-to-escorts-ask-me-anything/811295 "2018-03-27T20:37:38Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 13
**Author:** ![Davidngrk](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e47c2d/32.png) [@Davidngrk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Davidngrk)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2018, 10:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-was-addicted-to-escorts-ask-me-anything/811295/241 "2018-04-03T22:10:53Z")
> [@Ambivalid](#): > > BTW, what field of work are you in? > > ETA: Sorry if you’ve already mentioned this. I missed it if so. I am an accountant ---
**Author:** ![Ambivalid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a5b964/32.png) [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2018, 10:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-was-addicted-to-escorts-ask-me-anything/811295/242 "2018-04-03T22:19:00Z")
> [@Davidngrk](#): > > I am an accountant $400,000/yr as an accountant? That’s pretty impressive. ---
**Author:** ![Davidngrk](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e47c2d/32.png) [@Davidngrk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Davidngrk)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2018, 10:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-was-addicted-to-escorts-ask-me-anything/811295/243 "2018-04-03T22:20:33Z")
> [@Ambivalid](#): > > $400,000/yr as an accountant? That’s pretty impressive. I own my own firm. I have others do all the work, gives me time to get in trouble on the internet. ---
**Author:** ![Ambivalid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a5b964/32.png) [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2018, 10:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-was-addicted-to-escorts-ask-me-anything/811295/244 "2018-04-03T22:22:26Z")
> [@Davidngrk](#): > > I own my own firm. I have others do all the work, gives me time to get in trouble on the internet. _That_ makes more sense. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2018, 10:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-was-addicted-to-escorts-ask-me-anything/811295/245 "2018-04-03T22:34:14Z")
How are gonna refrain in the future? I mean playing Angry birds during a slow day at work ain’t gonna cut it. ---
**Author:** ![Ambivalid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a5b964/32.png) [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2018, 11:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-was-addicted-to-escorts-ask-me-anything/811295/246 "2018-04-03T23:51:26Z")
> [@Cartooniverse](#): > > Just in case anyone missed the\*\* bemusing\*\* sarcasm in that post, [that’s a myth soundly dispelled by Snopes.](https://www.snopes.com/fact-check/are-you-a-cop/) (my bold) I’m bemused by your bemusement. ---
**Author:** ![Ambivalid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a5b964/32.png) [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2018, 12:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-was-addicted-to-escorts-ask-me-anything/811295/247 "2018-04-04T00:00:55Z")
> [@Crazy\_Canuck](#): > > The most obvious way was the reaction when I told them no, either because I was sold out or that they didn’t have cash and I wouldn’t front them. The users reacted normally, but the addicts universally and completely lost their shit, with the most extreme cases resulting in me being threatened with a weapon or a dirty needle over it. This seems like a cartoonish characterization of addiction on your part. Especially considering your stance throughout this thread as one of dispelling stereotype and misconception, this stands out as telling to me. It also contrasts with your previous comments that many/most addicts are unremarkable people who, other than their regular use of heroin, are by and large indistinguishable from the average person. ---
**Author:** ![DooWahDiddy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e9bcb4/32.png) [@DooWahDiddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DooWahDiddy)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2018, 3:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-was-addicted-to-escorts-ask-me-anything/811295/248 "2018-04-04T03:56:25Z")
> [@Grrr](#): > > Sex happens. > > Convo happens while you recharge. > > Sex happens again. This reminds me of something I’ve always passively wondered. Is the fee for one “time”, or is it for a certain _amount_ of time? Like, is it once you’re done you’re done, or is it a thing where, if you could make it happen, you can do it several times in a half hour and still only pay once? (And if you can do that then good for you, kiddo.) ---
**Author:** ![Ambivalid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a5b964/32.png) [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2018, 4:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-was-addicted-to-escorts-ask-me-anything/811295/249 "2018-04-04T04:54:37Z")
> [@DooWahDiddy](#): > > This reminds me of something I’ve always passively wondered. Is the fee for one “time”, or is it for a certain _amount_ of time? Like, is it once you’re done you’re done, or is it a thing where, if you could make it happen, you can do it several times in a half hour and still only pay once? (And if you can do that then good for you, kiddo.) It depends on the individual provider. If they advertise “multiple pops”, that’s a sure sign that you can orgasm more than once in your alloted appointment time, assuming you are capable of more than a single orgasm. Even if it’s not specifically advertised, a provider haa the discretion to allow/disallow it on an individual basis. ---
**Author:** ![DooWahDiddy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e9bcb4/32.png) [@DooWahDiddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DooWahDiddy)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2018, 3:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-was-addicted-to-escorts-ask-me-anything/811295/250 "2018-04-04T15:54:19Z")
> [@Ambivalid](#): > > It depends on the individual provider. If they advertise “multiple pops”, that’s a sure sign that you can orgasm more than once in your alloted appointment time, assuming you are capable of more than a single orgasm. Even if it’s not specifically advertised, a provider haa the discretion to allow/disallow it on an individual basis. You seem pretty knowledgeable about it for someone who’s so condescending toward the OP. ---
**Author:** ![Davidngrk](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e47c2d/32.png) [@Davidngrk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Davidngrk)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2018, 4:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-was-addicted-to-escorts-ask-me-anything/811295/251 "2018-04-04T16:32:29Z")
> [@DooWahDiddy](#): > > This reminds me of something I’ve always passively wondered. Is the fee for one “time”, or is it for a certain _amount_ of time? Like, is it once you’re done you’re done, or is it a thing where, if you could make it happen, you can do it several times in a half hour and still only pay once? (And if you can do that then good for you, kiddo.) Ambivalid is correct. I could never get more than 1 pop at my age unless I did an overnight but overnights are incredibly expensive. Some girls would allow for multiple pops based on time you paid for and others probably just assumed once a guy came, the session was complete. ---
**Author:** ![Crazy\_Canuck](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/crazy_canuck/32/5282_2.png) [@Crazy\_Canuck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crazy_Canuck)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2018, 4:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-was-addicted-to-escorts-ask-me-anything/811295/252 "2018-04-04T16:41:26Z")
> [@Ambivalid](#): > > It also contrasts with your previous comments that many/most addicts are unremarkable people who, other than their regular use of heroin, are by and large indistinguishable from the average person. No, it doesn’t. The fact that many heroin users are not junkies does not mean that I am claiming that junkies do not exist. They do. To put it in perspective, when I got into the business and started selling weed and shrooms, I was scared of the cops. When I started selling cocaine, I realized that I should be more scared of my competition than the cops. When I started selling heroin, I realized that I should be more scared of my clients than my competition and the cops put together. Some of the shit that went down while I was selling H gave me nightmares that lasted for a long time after the shit in question, and I’m a jaded ex-con who is not easily shaken. I had one of those horrific nightmares again last night, so to protect my mental health I’m now bowing out of this thread. Believe whatever you want. ---
**Author:** ![Ambivalid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a5b964/32.png) [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2018, 7:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-was-addicted-to-escorts-ask-me-anything/811295/253 "2018-04-04T19:38:30Z")
> [@DooWahDiddy](#): > > You seem pretty knowledgeable about it for someone who’s so condescending toward the OP. My knowledge of the sex trade is what forms my attitude towards the OP. I would not describe it as condescending, not at all. Critical, not condescending. ---
**Author:** ![Ambivalid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a5b964/32.png) [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2018, 7:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-was-addicted-to-escorts-ask-me-anything/811295/254 "2018-04-04T19:40:28Z")
> [@Crazy\_Canuck](#): > > No, it doesn’t. The fact that many heroin users are not junkies does not mean that I am claiming that junkies do not exist. They do. > > To put it in perspective, when I got into the business and started selling weed and shrooms, I was scared of the cops. When I started selling cocaine, I realized that I should be more scared of my competition than the cops. When I started selling heroin, I realized that I should be more scared of my clients than my competition and the cops put together. Some of the shit that went down while I was selling H gave me nightmares that lasted for a long time after the shit in question, and I’m a jaded ex-con who is not easily shaken. I had one of those horrific nightmares again last night, so to protect my mental health I’m now bowing out of this thread. Believe whatever you want. Ok thanks. ---
**Author:** ![StusBlues](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/dc4da7/32.png) [@StusBlues](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/StusBlues)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2018, 7:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-was-addicted-to-escorts-ask-me-anything/811295/255 "2018-04-09T19:21:45Z")
Given that most of the sex work sites have shut down this week, I imagine that the OP’s fears of relapsing have been greatly assuaged. Or has he saved a few phone numbers…just in case? ---
**Author:** ![Blindsided2](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/c89c15/32.png) [@Blindsided2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Blindsided2)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2018, 7:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-was-addicted-to-escorts-ask-me-anything/811295/256 "2018-04-14T19:04:01Z")
David, I am curious what you were thinking about your wife during all this acting out? Did it change the way you viewed her when you’d have sex with these 20 yr old hot bodies and then go home to her who probably wrecked her hot body to give you a family? I am not trying to sound judgmental but can’t see how you wouldn’t compare the women. Do men compare or is this part of the compartmentalization that men do? ---
**Author:** ![Hector\_St\_Clare](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b5ac83/32.png) [@Hector\_St\_Clare](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hector_St_Clare)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2018, 3:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-was-addicted-to-escorts-ask-me-anything/811295/257 "2018-04-15T03:41:17Z")
> [@ruadh](#): > > The middle ground of women who don’t absolutely love doing sex work but prefer it to the other options available to them, whether that’s cleaning or flipping burgers or doing retail or office work, is much larger than the extremes of women who do absolutely love it or women who don’t have other options. That’s as true for the US as it is where I’m sitting. I think this is fairly accurate, based on studies I’ve seen from Australia, Switzerland, England and other societies where it’s legal. I was actually surprised to read how many sex workers actually do ‘like’ what they do (which isn’t the same as ‘absolutely love it’, of course). This is from a review by Ronald Weitzer: “Similarly, a study of indoor prostitutes (most of whom work in bars) in a Midwestern city in the United States found that three-quarters of them felt that their life had improved after entering prostitution (the remainder reported no change; none said it was worse than before); more than half said that they generally enjoy their work. In The Netherlands, three-quarters of indoor workers report that they enjoy their work. Research on 95 call girls in Sydney, Australia found that they were generally emotionally healthy. All of the escorts studied by Foltz took “pride in their profession” and viewed themselves as “morally superior” to others: “they consider women who are not ‘in the life’ to be throwing away woman’s major source of power and control [sexual capital], while they as prostitutes are using it to their own advantage as well as for the benefit of society.” And an Australian study found that half of call girls and brothel workers felt that their work as a “major source of satisfaction” in their lives, while 7 out of 10 said they would “definitely choose” this work if they had it to do over again. Other studies of indoor work report that the workers felt the job had at least some positive effect on their lives or believed that they were providing a valuable service.” and this is from a recent survey of sex workers in England, commented on by Elizabeth Nolan Brown here: "The “happy hooker” trope has taken a lot of flak. But job satisfaction was exceedingly high among sex workers surveyed here. Nearly half—48 percent—said they’re satisfied with their working conditions and 34 percent were “very satisfied.” Slightly over half said they’re “enthusiastic” about their work most of the time, and another 21 percent said they were enthusiastic some of the time. Nearly 82 percent either strongly agreed or tended to agree that they were well-paid for the work they did. And around 50 percent said their work was “socially useful” some or most of the time, with 22 percent saying it’s socially useful all of the time." > **[The Internet Makes Life Better and Safer for Sex Workers. Obviously.](https://reason.com/2018/01/25/the-internet-makes-life-for-sex-workers/)** > > A large new study out of the U.K. proves it. ---
**Author:** ![Hector\_St\_Clare](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b5ac83/32.png) [@Hector\_St\_Clare](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hector_St_Clare)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2018, 3:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-was-addicted-to-escorts-ask-me-anything/811295/258 "2018-04-15T03:57:50Z")
> [@DooWahDiddy](#): > > I’m surprised a board that leans toward being sexually open (I recall many threads about swinging, kinky games, nudist colonies, etc) is being so condescending and snarky toward the OP. Yes, he cheated on his wife, and maybe that’s what’s triggering everybody, but the conversation is about apples and you’re trying to shoehorn oranges into the bag, too. > > Obviously things like sex trafficking, underage prostitution, etc. are horrible and should be prosecuted, but anyone else over 18 can do whatever they want, so what the fuck do you care? Agreed. ---
**Author:** ![Hector\_St\_Clare](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b5ac83/32.png) [@Hector\_St\_Clare](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hector_St_Clare)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2018, 4:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-was-addicted-to-escorts-ask-me-anything/811295/259 "2018-04-15T04:03:46Z")
> [@Beckdawrek](#): > > By that token, you’re saying everything you do for money is prostitution. I can’t believe that is true. Pretty young girls can have good jobs. It’s possible to work hard and get a degree and have a fulfilling career. Prostitution is in no way fulfilling. There is no short cuts. And no free lunches. Quite a lot of people do find it fulfilling- I can furnish you other cites besides the two above, to that effect, from several different countries. I can also give you anecdotal accounts for whatever that’s worth, which is not much. ---
**Author:** ![ruadh](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/d2c977/32.png) [@ruadh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ruadh)\ **Post date:** [April 16, 2018, 6:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-was-addicted-to-escorts-ask-me-anything/811295/260 "2018-04-16T06:46:30Z")
> [@Hector\_St\_Clare](#): > > I was actually surprised to read how many sex workers actually do ‘like’ what they do (which isn’t the same as ‘absolutely love it’, of course). Literally, so much about the sex industry is counter-intuitive. Even as someone who would have been sort of knee-jerk anti-criminalisation since I first gave it any thought, when I actually began reading the research and talking to sex workers about it, I was surprised at how many of my assumptions were wrong. This is why it’s so important for policy-makers to engage with current sex workers before passing legislation that’s supposed to “help” them. They need to hear what sex workers actually need to protect themselves, stay safe, leave the industry if they want to. Legislating based on their own assumptions and prejudices and pressure from people who won’t even be affected by the laws is what leads to horrorshows like FOSTA and SESTA, which are already causing \*enormous \*harm. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-was-addicted-to-escorts-ask-me-anything/811295.md?page=12)