# I was "fired" last week
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-was-fired-last-week/591353
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
**Created:** [August 3, 2011, 7:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-was-fired-last-week/591353 "2011-08-03T19:13:50Z")
**Posts on this page:** 5
**Page:** 3
### Author:  [@control-z](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/control-z)
#### Post date: [August 4, 2011, 7:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-was-fired-last-week/591353/41 "2011-08-04T19:47:35Z")
> [@Shodan](#):
>
> I was hoping **PoorYorick** would say that he drove home, and his key didn’t work in the front door, and when he rang the doorbell and his wife answered, she would say “Do I know you?”
>
> And it was all an incredibly involved conspiracy, but the only thing They forgot was to de-activate his SDMB account.
>
> Harrison Ford should star in the movie.
So he goes to an Internet cafe and begins conferring with the only people in the world who acknowledge knowing him, and with their help he begins unraveling a vast conspiracy that leads all the way to the paperboy who he owes $12.83 to. That’ll teach you to rip off the middle Williams kid.
---
### Author:  [@Fear\_Itself](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fear_Itself)
#### Post date: [August 6, 2011, 12:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-was-fired-last-week/591353/42 "2011-08-06T12:28:27Z")
> [@PoorYorick](#):
>
> My collegues in Brazil are getting panicky…
> [@beowulff](#):
>
> Is your real name “Buttle” IRL?
> [@PoorYorick](#):
>
> Sorry, I don’t get it.
> [@Ferret\_Herder](#):
>
> It’s a plot point from the excellent film [Brazil](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Brazil_%28film%29)…
Ah HA!!!
---
### Author:  [@AWB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AWB)
#### Post date: [August 6, 2011, 12:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-was-fired-last-week/591353/43 "2011-08-06T12:34:21Z")
> [@PoorYorick](#):
>
> When it happened to me, I knew it was a screw up that would eventually be made right. I can’t imagine those other people, though. With the embarrassment and stress that they probably felt, I can’t imagine they’re happy employees.
>
> There’s a moral here, but damned if I can see it.
To err is human. To really screw things up, you need a computer.
---
### Author:  [@chromaticity](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chromaticity)
#### Post date: [August 7, 2011, 2:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-was-fired-last-week/591353/44 "2011-08-07T14:06:35Z")
> [@AWB](#):
>
> To err is human. To really screw things up, you need a computer.
I would rephrase that as - To really screw up things, you need an idiot with delusions of grandeur (AKA HR) behind a computer.
---
### Author:  [@lel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lel)
#### Post date: [August 7, 2011, 5:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-was-fired-last-week/591353/45 "2011-08-07T17:16:15Z")
> [@gotpasswords](#):
>
> [bolding mine]
> Slacker! 😛
>
> For some of our systems, we have a 15-minute SLA to disable terminated users. Pretty much anyone who had financial access (tellers, cash vault operators, wires clerks, etc) get run through the emergency termination protocol. Every bit of their access is to be e-termed - mainframe, LAN, building access, remote access, and so on. Ideally, it’s all gone while the former employee is still in their manager’s office, being told that their services are no longer required.
I am in awe at your company’s efficiency in terminating employees.
[Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-was-fired-last-week/591353.md?page=2)