# I washed my hands dammit! It's not fair! **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [March 18, 2006, 1:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-washed-my-hands-dammit-its-not-fair/348855 "2006-03-18T01:32:28Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 7\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![astro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9dc877/32.png) [@astro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astro)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2006, 1:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-washed-my-hands-dammit-its-not-fair/348855/1 "2006-03-18T01:32:28Z")
I made a power meal tonight of a big 8 oz package of cheap tuna fish, some spicy V8, 2 big WASA crackers, and some sliced dill pickle. I also crushed some dried habaneros in a paper towel and mixed them with some cracked black pepper and sprinkled some of it on the tuna. Yummy! Remembering the pepper experts on the SDMB’s admonition to wash you hands after handling I ran some water over them and wiped them on a towel. After eating I had the urge to move some fluid and now I have this distinct burning sensation in my delicate manly parts that is growing more and more intense. Fuck it! I washed my hands with water. It’s not fair! Thank God I didn’t rub my eyes! I just put my fingers in my mouth to see if there’s any pepper residue (and I’ve washed my hands _twice_ at this point) and it’s like I’ve got liquid fire on them. Jesus! This pepper oil is amzingly tenacious. I’m on fire! ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2006, 1:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-washed-my-hands-dammit-its-not-fair/348855/2 "2006-03-18T01:33:57Z")
Did you use soap? Water alone won’t cut it-you need soap. Or milk, or alcohol. My horticulture teacher in high school couldn’t wear his contact lenses for three days once because he did something like that. ---
**Author:** ![astro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9dc877/32.png) [@astro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astro)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2006, 1:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-washed-my-hands-dammit-its-not-fair/348855/3 "2006-03-18T01:36:05Z")
Cold water - These ads are killing me! ---
**Author:** ![ivylass](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/9de053/32.png) [@ivylass](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ivylass)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2006, 1:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-washed-my-hands-dammit-its-not-fair/348855/4 "2006-03-18T01:36:03Z")
Water won’t do shit, my friend. The liquid pepper is oil, and water won’t cut it. Try some soap. Dinner sounded good, though. ---
**Author:** ![ouryL](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ouryl/32/6067_2.png) [@ouryL](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ouryL)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2006, 3:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-washed-my-hands-dammit-its-not-fair/348855/5 "2006-03-18T03:21:31Z")
> [@astro](#): > > I made a power meal tonight of a big 8 oz package of cheap tuna fish, some spicy V8, 2 big WASA crackers, and some sliced dill pickle. I also crushed some dried habaneros in a paper towel and mixed them with some cracked black pepper and sprinkled some of it on the tuna. Yummy! Remembering the pepper experts on the SDMB’s admonition to wash you hands after handling I ran some water over them and wiped them on a towel. > > After eating I had the urge to move some fluid and now I have this distinct burning sensation in my delicate manly parts that is growing more and more intense. Fuck it! I washed my hands with water. It’s not fair! Thank God I didn’t rub my eyes! I just put my fingers in my mouth to see if there’s any pepper residue (and I’ve washed my hands _twice_ at this point) and it’s like I’ve got liquid fire on them. > > Jesus! This pepper oil is amzingly tenacious. I’m on fire! So you discovered Mexican Viagra! ---
**Author:** ![twickster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@twickster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twickster)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2006, 3:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-washed-my-hands-dammit-its-not-fair/348855/6 "2006-03-18T03:30:23Z")
> [@ouryL](#): > > So you discovered Mexican Viagra! If only that had happened a little earlier… 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Scissorjack](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c67d28/32.png) [@Scissorjack](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scissorjack)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2006, 5:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-washed-my-hands-dammit-its-not-fair/348855/7 "2006-03-18T05:48:48Z")
Rub your goolies with olive brine. It won’t do shit for the pain, but they’ll make great _hors d’oeuvres_.