# I wish to declare war on a foreign country. **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [June 6, 2011, 1:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-wish-to-declare-war-on-a-foreign-country/584464 "2011-06-06T01:15:52Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Revtim](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/revtim/32/1042_2.png) [@Revtim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Revtim)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2011, 1:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-wish-to-declare-war-on-a-foreign-country/584464/41 "2011-06-06T13:25:20Z")
> [@RickJay](#): > > It helps if you provide links to posts by the people you seem to think you’re so much smarter than. I second the request for a link, please ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2011, 1:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-wish-to-declare-war-on-a-foreign-country/584464/42 "2011-06-06T13:26:57Z")
It’s not the head of lettuce you have to worry about. It’s the fist of melon. ---
**Author:** ![Azeotrope](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/0ea827/32.png) [@Azeotrope](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Azeotrope)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2011, 1:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-wish-to-declare-war-on-a-foreign-country/584464/43 "2011-06-06T13:27:41Z")
> [@MichaelEmouse](#): > > Does anyone remember the woman, who, in a thread about college education, kept insisting others were inferior to her because they didn’t have a degree from a school as good as hers? She also was against a woman asking her man to marry. I can’t remember her name, she was banned so quickly. That’d be [Trubie](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=597333). I also remember her shitting up a thread about parenting by insisting that one could catch hepatitis from a dirty diaper. ---
**Author:** ![Try2B\_Comprehensive](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/try2b_comprehensive/32/65_2.png) [@Try2B\_Comprehensive](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Try2B_Comprehensive)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2011, 1:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-wish-to-declare-war-on-a-foreign-country/584464/44 "2011-06-06T13:29:51Z")
The previous Head of Lettuce got sacked after the last e-coli scare. The new Head, I’m told, is far more clever. ---
**Author:** ![Sailboat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sailboat/32/461_2.png) [@Sailboat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sailboat)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2011, 1:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-wish-to-declare-war-on-a-foreign-country/584464/45 "2011-06-06T13:35:03Z")
I was hoping to find out what this was about instead of joining in a pile-on. Unfortunately, I can’t tell from reading the OP. Links might help, but a cogent explanation would help more. If you’re expecting me to call up everyone’s post histories and do a lot of research just to try and grasp what this is about, you’ll find my interest waning rapidly. ---
**Author:** ![Death\_of\_Rats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a6a055/32.png) [@Death\_of\_Rats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Death_of_Rats)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2011, 1:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-wish-to-declare-war-on-a-foreign-country/584464/46 "2011-06-06T13:38:19Z")
> [@Attack\_from\_the\_3rd\_dimension](#): > > He’s sending dopers to destroy aircraft carriers with lettuce? A plan so crazy, so audacious, _it just might WORK!_ but probably not. > [@Revtim](#): > > I second the request for a link, please Somehow, I doubt that would really help clarify his position. ---
**Author:** ![Azeotrope](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/0ea827/32.png) [@Azeotrope](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Azeotrope)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2011, 1:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-wish-to-declare-war-on-a-foreign-country/584464/47 "2011-06-06T13:46:16Z")
> [@surrounded\_by\_literalists](#): > > This lettuce…are we talking genuine military grade lettuce, or imported lettuce from various South American countries? Do we have to test it for E. coli first? I mean, doesn’t the USA frown on biological warfare, except in the case of deliberate small pox exposure of the Native Americans in the 18th century? Do we have to provide dressing with that? God, this could be the next political nightmare! Well, the Russians are insisting on Russian dressing on iceberg wedges, but the French denounced it as vile orange swill, pfui! They are insisting on mesclun greens with white wine vinaigrette and chevre, and mocking the clueless Americans for daring to associate that other vile orange swill dressing with France. In the meantime, the Italians are at each others’ throats over the croutons vs. no croutons deliberations, the Swiss are pondering why everyone is assuming this has to be some lettuce-based concoction when the definition of “salad” includes so much more, and thanks to deficit spending the Americans are having to resort to ripping dandelions out of their yards as part of “Operation Salad Daze.” ---
**Author:** ![Try2B\_Comprehensive](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/try2b_comprehensive/32/65_2.png) [@Try2B\_Comprehensive](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Try2B_Comprehensive)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2011, 1:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-wish-to-declare-war-on-a-foreign-country/584464/48 "2011-06-06T13:55:42Z")
It is more serious than you think. See [here](http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/europe/italy/6575603/Silvio-Berlusconi-uses-food-summit-as-excuse-to-miss-trial.html): > [@](#): > > Silvio Berlusconi will use the start of a global food security summit in Rome on Monday as a pretext for not turning up at the resumption of a trial in which he is accused of corruption. Also, while **Airman Doors** may be disagreed with, I’ve never seen any reason whatever to disrespect him. You really should apologize, Jac. ---
**Author:** ![Merijeek](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f05b48/32.png) [@Merijeek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Merijeek)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2011, 2:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-wish-to-declare-war-on-a-foreign-country/584464/49 "2011-06-06T14:04:49Z")
> [@Attack\_from\_the\_3rd\_dimension](#): > > He’s sending dopers to destroy aircraft carriers with lettuce? RAIL GUN! RAIL GUN! RAIL GUNNNNNNN! -Joe, they can see my erection from space! ---
**Author:** ![Living\_Well\_Is\_Best\_Revenge](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/6bbea6/32.png) [@Living\_Well\_Is\_Best\_Revenge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Living_Well_Is_Best_Revenge)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2011, 2:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-wish-to-declare-war-on-a-foreign-country/584464/50 "2011-06-06T14:10:43Z")
I wish a mod would explain why this dumbass hasn’t been banned yet. It seems others have been banned for lesser violations. But of course I could be wrong. ---
**Author:** ![John\_Mace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_mace/32/185_2.png) [@John\_Mace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Mace)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2011, 2:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-wish-to-declare-war-on-a-foreign-country/584464/51 "2011-06-06T14:49:04Z")
> [@Ravenman](#): > > Mods, can we just ban this troll already? I’m usually not one to call for a banning, but **Le Trollelope** is overdue. It’s pretty clear that his only purpose in posting is to hurl insults. ---
**Author:** ![surrounded\_by\_literalists](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/8baadc/32.png) [@surrounded\_by\_literalists](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/surrounded_by_literalists)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2011, 3:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-wish-to-declare-war-on-a-foreign-country/584464/52 "2011-06-06T15:11:54Z")
> [@John\_Mace](#): > > I’m usually not one to call for a banning, but **Le Trollelope** is overdue. It’s pretty clear that his only purpose in posting is to hurl insults. Yeah…but we have hurl appropriate, multinational, lettuce; possibly contaminated with E.coli, but we’re not sure, and some guy has an erection that can be seen from space. I think we can take him. ---
**Author:** ![Sitnam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Sitnam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sitnam)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2011, 4:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-wish-to-declare-war-on-a-foreign-country/584464/53 "2011-06-06T16:10:47Z")
> [@John\_Mace](#): > > I’m usually not one to call for a banning, but **Le Trollelope** is overdue. It’s pretty clear that his only purpose in posting is to hurl insults. If only his insults had wit I might be a supporter. Sometimes these threads are fun just to watch a troll gets his rhetorical arms ripped off and beaten to death with them, but the fool must play his part too and give us material. This tween’s silly keyboard banging isn’t cutting it. ---
**Author:** ![Who\_me\_1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/958977/32.png) [@Who\_me\_1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Who_me_1)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2011, 4:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-wish-to-declare-war-on-a-foreign-country/584464/54 "2011-06-06T16:16:24Z")
> [@Le\_Jacquelope](#): > > Wee-wee. Another big word (by your standards) you know precious little about. Don’t worry, though, when you’re through training, in about 15 or so years, you’ll get told what a wee-wee actually is. Not that you’ll understand. Hint:\*\* it’s that pubic hair you piss from.\*\* Bolding Mine Now, to correct your misinformation… That may be what it seems to you, but if you’re a male, most of us have wee-wees a might bit larger than that. But that could explain your behavior… ---
**Author:** ![PlainJain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/5daacb/32.png) [@PlainJain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PlainJain)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2011, 4:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-wish-to-declare-war-on-a-foreign-country/584464/55 "2011-06-06T16:59:42Z")
> [@Sitnam](#): > > This tween’s silly keyboard banging isn’t cutting it. It appears he is a 40 year old black man. ---
**Author:** ![Oakminster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/77aa72/32.png) [@Oakminster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oakminster)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2011, 5:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-wish-to-declare-war-on-a-foreign-country/584464/56 "2011-06-06T17:25:53Z")
This board is sometimes annoyingly slow to ban obvious trolls, such as this one. I’d have shown him the door a long time ago. ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2011, 5:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-wish-to-declare-war-on-a-foreign-country/584464/57 "2011-06-06T17:58:34Z")
> [@Revtim](#): > > I second the request for a link, please You are going to regret it, both of you. ---
**Author:** ![Revtim](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/revtim/32/1042_2.png) [@Revtim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Revtim)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2011, 6:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-wish-to-declare-war-on-a-foreign-country/584464/58 "2011-06-06T18:01:39Z")
Nah, worst case is I lose interest. ---
**Author:** ![Sitnam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Sitnam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sitnam)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2011, 7:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-wish-to-declare-war-on-a-foreign-country/584464/59 "2011-06-06T19:05:47Z")
> [@PlainJain](#): > > It appears he is a 40 year old black man. He may as well have said he was Santa Claus. No adult writes like him. ---
**Author:** ![Yeticus\_Rex](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/a698b9/32.png) [@Yeticus\_Rex](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yeticus_Rex)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2011, 7:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-wish-to-declare-war-on-a-foreign-country/584464/60 "2011-06-06T19:39:49Z")
I wish to declare war on a narcissistic troll. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-wish-to-declare-war-on-a-foreign-country/584464.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-wish-to-declare-war-on-a-foreign-country/584464.md?page=4)