# "I won't leave Aruba without her" **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [June 7, 2005, 5:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-wont-leave-aruba-without-her/307261 "2005-06-07T05:20:16Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2005, 5:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-wont-leave-aruba-without-her/307261/1 "2005-06-07T05:20:16Z")
(if I knew how to link, it would be here) Mom says of daughther, gone missing on the island. $10 says she does. Secondary point: Why the hell does a high-school class need to trip to freakin’ Aruba? Disney World closed down that week? 😕 ---
**Author:** ![Batsinma\_Belfry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ea5d25/32.png) [@Batsinma\_Belfry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Batsinma_Belfry)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2005, 5:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-wont-leave-aruba-without-her/307261/2 "2005-06-07T05:36:20Z")
> [@gatopescado](#): > > Secondary point: Why the hell does a high-school class need to trip to freakin’ Aruba? Disney World closed down that week? 😕 And why the hell were they hanging out at a bar? ---
**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2005, 5:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-wont-leave-aruba-without-her/307261/3 "2005-06-07T05:45:54Z")
> [@hillbilly queen](#): > > And why the hell were they hanging out at a bar? Is that a joke? 😉 ---
**Author:** ![guizot](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guizot/32/3636_2.png) [@guizot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/guizot)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2005, 5:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-wont-leave-aruba-without-her/307261/4 "2005-06-07T05:48:09Z")
> [@gatopescado](#): > > (if I knew how to link, it would be here) > > Mom says of daughther, gone missing on the island. > > $10 says she does. > > Secondary point: Why the hell does a high-school class need to trip to freakin’ Aruba? Disney World closed down that week? 😕 It’s all just a ploy for the mother to retire on the beaches of Aruba. ---
**Author:** ![Flutterby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/6f9a4e/32.png) [@Flutterby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Flutterby)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2005, 5:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-wont-leave-aruba-without-her/307261/5 "2005-06-07T05:48:39Z")
> [@hillbilly queen](#): > > And why the hell were they hanging out at a bar? Well, they probably snuck out. And according to [this](http://www.cnn.com/2005/WORLD/americas/06/05/missing.teen/) article she was 18 which is Aruba’s drinking age. ---
**Author:** ![Cunctator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/43a26b/32.png) [@Cunctator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cunctator)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2005, 6:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-wont-leave-aruba-without-her/307261/6 "2005-06-07T06:09:28Z")
So you don’t think this woman is entitled to be concerned about her daughter’s disappearance? 😕 ---
**Author:** ![Waterman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/b2d939/32.png) [@Waterman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Waterman)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2005, 7:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-wont-leave-aruba-without-her/307261/7 "2005-06-07T07:09:16Z")
According to what I have read, she, along with several classmates, had gone to a concert then to this restaurant/club for dinner and dancing. What happened to this point doesn’t strike me as unusual or bad. The trouble started when she left the restaurant/club. First of all, where were the chaperone’s and secondly, supposedly several of her “friends” saw her get in the car with the three other boys (the “persons of interest” not the one’s arrested) and why did they not say something to her or at least report it immediately to the chaperone’s? It also strikes me, based on what has been reported, that this girl probably had no business being on her own at 1:00 AM in the morning as even her relatives describe her as being “innocent” and “naive”. ---
**Author:** ![Batsinma\_Belfry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ea5d25/32.png) [@Batsinma\_Belfry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Batsinma_Belfry)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2005, 7:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-wont-leave-aruba-without-her/307261/8 "2005-06-07T07:36:35Z")
> [@hillbilly queen](#): > > And why the hell were they hanging out at a bar? Let me rephrase that… Why the hell were they hanging out at a bar, during a class trip? Were they going to go to a strip club the next day? ---
**Author:** ![Harborwolf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/c89c15/32.png) [@Harborwolf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Harborwolf)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2005, 7:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-wont-leave-aruba-without-her/307261/9 "2005-06-07T07:59:29Z")
> [@Cunctator](#): > > So you don’t think this woman is entitled to be concerned about her daughter’s disappearance? 😕 I took it as more of a pessimistic ☹ kind of statement. YMMV ---
**Author:** ![belladonna](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/9fc29f/32.png) [@belladonna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/belladonna)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2005, 10:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-wont-leave-aruba-without-her/307261/10 "2005-06-07T10:46:13Z")
FTR, this was not a “class trip” in the sense that it was sponsored by the school. It was a group of students who’d gone together, and the location was chosen by the group. The adults were not really chaperones from what I’ve read, more like traveling companions. So the level of supervision was not high, but everyone knew that going into it. That said, it’s terrible that this girl is missing and likely dead, and I hope her family can find comfort in any way they can. ---
**Author:** ![Shirley\_Ujest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2005, 11:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-wont-leave-aruba-without-her/307261/11 "2005-06-07T11:45:31Z")
:dubious: My only thoughts on this, besides ‘how awful and what a nightmare’, are, 'Don’t Af-am, hispanic or asian peoples go a-missing ?" or is it always pretty white things that disappear? It’s all so mysterious. :dubious: ---
**Author:** ![archmichael](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/bb73d2/32.png) [@archmichael](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/archmichael)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2005, 12:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-wont-leave-aruba-without-her/307261/12 "2005-06-07T12:46:37Z")
> [@Shirley Ujest](#): > > :dubious: My only thoughts on this, besides ‘how awful and what a nightmare’, are, 'Don’t Af-am, hispanic or asian peoples go a-missing ?" or is it always pretty white things that disappear? > It’s all so mysterious. :dubious: Not sure about all the rules, but they seem to be: - If your a guy and you disappear, you are fucked. Unless you are a Kennedy, or one of the many franchised affiliates. - If you are a female person of color (non-white), you better be damn good looking. Gabrielle Union level if you are a black woman, Kelly Hu level if you are an Asian woman or JLo level if you are a Latina. AND it has to be a slow news day. - If you are a young white woman, you only have to be mildly attractive. Bonus if the Media can get a hold of an old photo of you in a cheerleader outfit, or a vacation photo of you in a bikini. ---
**Author:** ![Casey1505](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/dc4da7/32.png) [@Casey1505](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Casey1505)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2005, 12:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-wont-leave-aruba-without-her/307261/13 "2005-06-07T12:50:30Z")
Don’t forget about living comfortably in the upper middle class, at least. Little Jenny from the Trailer Park probably can’t afford Senior Week trips to Aruba. ---
**Author:** ![archmichael](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/bb73d2/32.png) [@archmichael](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/archmichael)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2005, 1:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-wont-leave-aruba-without-her/307261/14 "2005-06-07T13:03:24Z")
> [@Casey1505](#): > > Don’t forget about living comfortably in the upper middle class, at least. Little Jenny from the Trailer Park probably can’t afford Senior Week trips to Aruba. “Jennifer XXXXXX, known as ‘Little Jenny’ to her friends, worked an after school job her entire senior year. She was saving every bit of money to go on a Senior trip with her friends. A dream trip, but a dream trip that has ended in… tragedy” trumps them all. ---
**Author:** ![Fionn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/a587f6/32.png) [@Fionn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fionn)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2005, 1:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-wont-leave-aruba-without-her/307261/15 "2005-06-07T13:11:08Z")
> [@archmichael](#): > > “Jennifer XXXXXX, known as ‘Little Jenny’ to her friends, worked an after school job her entire senior year. She was saving every bit of money to go on a Senior trip with her friends. A dream trip, but a dream trip that has ended in… tragedy” trumps them all. Only if Jennifer XXXXXX is attractive. ---
**Author:** ![Trunk](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/87869e/32.png) [@Trunk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trunk)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2005, 1:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-wont-leave-aruba-without-her/307261/16 "2005-06-07T13:48:46Z")
> [@Cunctator](#): > > So you don’t think this woman is entitled to be concerned about her daughter’s disappearance? 😕 Of course she does. The OP is just betting that she leaves Aruba without her, despite her assertion to the contrary. ---
**Author:** ![John\_Carter\_of\_Mars](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/2bfe46/32.png) [@John\_Carter\_of\_Mars](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Carter_of_Mars)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2005, 2:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-wont-leave-aruba-without-her/307261/17 "2005-06-07T14:01:25Z")
> [@Fionn](#): > > Only if Jennifer XXXXXX is attractive. And not to single out **Fionn** , as others have expressed similar opinions, but: The little nine-year old girl that was killed by the sex offender north of Tampa was cute and white, but certainly not sexy or rich. She got plenty of attention. The 13 year-old girl that was killed by her mom’s ex, somewhere south of Tampa, was a latina, lived in a trailer and was not physically attractive. She got plenty of attention. Currently, a 60 year old case of the murder of a black Mississippi teenager is being re-opened and is recieving plenty of attention. I believe it’s the circumstances, more than the other factors of beauty, social status and race that determine the amount of coverage. It’s a given that the media is going to show pictures. If the victim is attractive, maybe a few more pictures, sure. Claims in this thread that attractive, wealthy, white people’s cases get all the attention don’t hold water, IMHO. ---
**Author:** ![Rysto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ecccb3/32.png) [@Rysto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rysto)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2005, 3:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-wont-leave-aruba-without-her/307261/18 "2005-06-07T15:14:13Z")
> [@belladonna](#): > > FTR, this was not a “class trip” in the sense that it was sponsored by the school. It was a group of students who’d gone together, and the location was chosen by the group. The adults were not really chaperones from what I’ve read, more like traveling companions. So the level of supervision was not high, but everyone knew that going into it. When I graduated 2 years ago, the grad trip to Cuba was completely unchaperoned. I don’t know how our school’s administration was involved, but I have a feeling that it was something along the lines of, “We disavow all knowledge of this trip, so don’t sue us if something goes wrong.” ---
**Author:** ![Mehitabel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/8797f3/32.png) [@Mehitabel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mehitabel)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2005, 4:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-wont-leave-aruba-without-her/307261/19 "2005-06-07T16:12:28Z")
To be fair, I think part of the issue is that African-American or Latino families are often mistrustful of the media. I often see mothers of missing black children sending out a ‘family spokesman’ or Jesse Jackson, whoever’s closest, to ask for prayers but also to say that they’d like to be left alone now. Often the fathers are absent and the aunts, uncles, and classmates don’t run for the cameras either. No press conferences, no fundraisers, no prayer vigils, no articulate family members with the resources to take off work and fly to other states let alone countries, little coverage. Also, to be terribly blunt, the lives of poor families of all colors are often confused and filled with domestic violence and people moving without notice, and there’s no “hook” to grab the media. ---
**Author:** ![archmichael](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/bb73d2/32.png) [@archmichael](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/archmichael)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2005, 4:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-wont-leave-aruba-without-her/307261/20 "2005-06-07T16:32:45Z")
> [@John Carter of Mars](#): > > Claims in this thread that attractive, wealthy, white people’s cases get all the attention don’t hold water, IMHO. I don’t think that NATIONAL news producers sit around hoping for a story with a checklist of white, wealthy and attractive. I do think they are looking for people that are attractive or think will be attractive to Middle America. Being white gives you a bump up, just by standards of beauty. Even within white victims, blondes seem to win out a lot more than brunettes. And being wealthy will generally mean you can afford to visits to the dermatologist to have great looking skin. The hair stylist to give you that great looking $100 haircut. The plastic surgeon to maximize your ‘assets’. The last time I was scratching my head in confusion as to why it made the National news was Schapelle Corby, who was sentenced to jail time by an Indonesian court for having quantities of marijuana in her suitcase. I am sure she is not the first Australian to be charged for this crime. So why did the Australian press choose to pick up on it? Why did the American press decide to make it part of our national news? The only reason I could figure out is that she was attractive [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-wont-leave-aruba-without-her/307261.md?page=2)