# I wrote a novel **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Tags:** books-writing-myths\ **Created:** [October 8, 2025, 5:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-wrote-a-novel/1023789 "2025-10-08T17:47:39Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![RickJay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/bb73d2/32.png) [@RickJay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RickJay)\ **Post date:** [November 7, 2025, 5:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-wrote-a-novel/1023789/41 "2025-11-07T17:45:13Z")
There are a lot of online guides to this. Kindle prints books on demand, you needn’t worry about that, but you need professionals to design the cover, format the inside, and do your copy editing (that’s minimum to make it look like a real book. You may also want to invest in a developmental editor.) It’s not gonna be cheap but hey, you only live once. I’m already saving my money to do this if it turns out to be necessary. ---
**Author:** ![Mongoose3](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/3e96dc/32.png) [@Mongoose3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mongoose3)\ **Post date:** [November 7, 2025, 6:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-wrote-a-novel/1023789/42 "2025-11-07T18:04:36Z")
It’s worth pointing out, I’m published with a small press. I got zero advance, only royalties and money from selling the audi rights. And the publisher did well with the marketing, I think mostly advertising on Amazon. ---
**Author:** ![RickJay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/bb73d2/32.png) [@RickJay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RickJay)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2025, 2:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-wrote-a-novel/1023789/43 "2025-11-09T14:43:51Z")
Well I might come looking for advice someday. ---
**Author:** ![Spice\_Weasel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spice_weasel/32/5435_2.png) [@Spice\_Weasel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spice_Weasel)\ **Post date:** [November 11, 2025, 10:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-wrote-a-novel/1023789/44 "2025-11-11T22:41:59Z")
Good to know. If they would do marketing _for_ me, that’s a compelling reason to go small. ---
**Author:** ![RickJay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/bb73d2/32.png) [@RickJay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RickJay)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2025, 9:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-wrote-a-novel/1023789/45 "2025-12-09T21:46:04Z")
Got a second story actually published (three more have been accepted but are not yet out.) This is also a comedy. Actually most of my stories AREN’T comedies; it’s just a fluke the first two out were. > **[Connor the Magnificent by Richard Jones](https://www.fictionontheweb.co.uk/2025/12/connor-magnificent-by-richard-jones.html?fbclid=IwY2xjawOldzxleHRuA2FlbQIxMQBzcnRjBmFwcF9pZBAyMjIwMzkxNzg4MjAwODkyAAEer6RDEzsMUm_oJcXEIIdD9n7KAEFY4GAdPElb4FbmlaSYH6HA0LLM6IaYPQw_aem_tPsu2_s0LsebefUpWnwP-Q&brid=pmDFjet8cE4V2PTNkXIi2Q)** > > Short stories hand-picked from authors around the world. Submissions accepted. Humour, crime, sci-fi, fantasy, horror and everyday life. In other news, rejections for the novel are starting to roll in. I know the numbers game here. It’s still discouraging. ---
**Author:** ![Mongoose3](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/3e96dc/32.png) [@Mongoose3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mongoose3)\ **Post date:** [December 11, 2025, 6:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-wrote-a-novel/1023789/46 "2025-12-11T18:27:52Z")
Hilarious. Let me knownif you put anything else out! The rejections are rough. But you’re creating great stories. I hope you enjoy writing them, ---
**Author:** ![hajario](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hajario/32/171_2.png) [@hajario](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hajario)\ **Post date:** [December 11, 2025, 7:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-wrote-a-novel/1023789/47 "2025-12-11T19:07:45Z")
LOVED it. It’s very rare that writing makes me laugh out loud and that did several times. Great job. ---
**Author:** ![RickJay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/bb73d2/32.png) [@RickJay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RickJay)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2025, 7:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-wrote-a-novel/1023789/48 "2025-12-17T19:23:58Z")
Another comedy one will be out on Saturday. I’ll link to it then. Serious ones out next January and April, unless something happens before then. So far, submission statistics: NOVEL 0 for 18 with agents. STORIES (16 of them) - 141 submissions in total: 5 accepted 91 rejected or clearly passed on without notifications 45 no answer yet or passed without notification ---
**Author:** ![Lightnin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lightnin/32/180_2.png) [@Lightnin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lightnin)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2025, 6:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-wrote-a-novel/1023789/49 "2025-12-19T18:33:15Z")
I got my first acceptance! It’s going to be performed as a podcast. I made a cool 78 bucks, so I plan on quitting my day job. ---
**Author:** ![Spice\_Weasel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spice_weasel/32/5435_2.png) [@Spice\_Weasel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spice_Weasel)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2025, 7:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-wrote-a-novel/1023789/50 "2025-12-19T19:28:38Z")
Congratulations! ---
**Author:** ![RickJay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/bb73d2/32.png) [@RickJay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RickJay)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2025, 8:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-wrote-a-novel/1023789/51 "2025-12-19T20:10:09Z")
Nice! I’m sending a few things to the podcast sites too. Which one did you get in to? ---
**Author:** ![Atamasama](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/atamasama/32/12961_2.png) [@Atamasama](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Atamasama)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2025, 8:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-wrote-a-novel/1023789/52 "2025-12-19T20:16:18Z")
> [@RickJay](#): > > Another comedy one will be out on Saturday. I’m looking forward to it. That magician story was so freaking good. I could see it as a TV show on an anthology series. Now I’m a fan of at least 3 different authors who post on this board. ---
**Author:** ![Lightnin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lightnin/32/180_2.png) [@Lightnin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lightnin)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2025, 8:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-wrote-a-novel/1023789/53 "2025-12-19T20:26:14Z")
> [@RickJay](#): > > Nice! I’m sending a few things to the podcast sites too. Which one did you get in to? [CreepyPod](https://www.creepypod.com/). My story will be “Rituals”, but I’m not very clear on when it’ll be out. ---
**Author:** ![RickJay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/bb73d2/32.png) [@RickJay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RickJay)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2025, 5:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-wrote-a-novel/1023789/54 "2025-12-20T05:54:51Z")
Another funny one published. Honestly, I mostly write serious ones, but these seem easier to get picked up. > **["Leon and the Zubman," by Rick Jones](https://www.defenestrationmag.net/2025/12/leon-and-the-zubman-by-rick-jones/)** > > It was nine in the morning, and Leon was well into the story mode of the latest Call of Duty. He had beaten all the Call of Dutys, or Calls of Duty, depending how you approached the pluralization. He didn't know what this one was fully called—Call of... ---
**Author:** ![stopnonstop](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/5f9b8f/32.png) [@stopnonstop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/stopnonstop)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 2025, 4:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-wrote-a-novel/1023789/55 "2025-12-25T04:31:38Z")
Any response on your novel RickJay? I just finished writing my first which took seven months which I thought was fast - not comparable to fourteen weeks! Have you submitted it to a bunch of agencies at once, or are you doing a few at a time? I’m new to the game and have read that when you submit to an agency they want to know about who else you submitted it to. Did you spend a fair amount of time polishing up your query like the first chapters of your book? This may all sounds overly anxious, and if it does, I apologise. Just want to sincerely congratulate you on your novel and am curious about the process from a completed work to eventually seeing it published. ---
**Author:** ![iamatractorboy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/iamatractorboy/32/21261_2.png) [@iamatractorboy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iamatractorboy)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 2025, 7:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-wrote-a-novel/1023789/56 "2025-12-25T07:58:26Z")
I really enjoyed _Dave is Dead._ Loved the deadpan nature of the humour; that was right up my street. It also kept me guessing as to how it was all going to climax. The story about the magician (sorry, the name escapes me now) was amusing and entertaining too, but a little too slapstick for me (no offence meant and hope honest feedback is what you need). The writing style between the two stories seemed quite different to me, which I think is a good thing as that is a nice skill to have. ---
**Author:** ![RickJay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/bb73d2/32.png) [@RickJay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RickJay)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2025, 1:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-wrote-a-novel/1023789/57 "2025-12-28T01:17:53Z")
> [@stopnonstop](#): > > Any response on your novel RickJay? I just finished writing my first which took seven months which I thought was fast - not comparable to fourteen weeks! Have you submitted it to a bunch of agencies at once, or are you doing a few at a time? Chunks of 15-20. Chunk 1 got no interest; I’ve since done some adjustments to my query letters and changed chapter 1 to make it start faster (probably to the detriment of the novel later, but whatever, I just need a few requests for the whole thing.) I’ll start more chunks after the new year. As to your question about agencies asking who else you’ve submitted to, NONE ‘ve ever encountered have asked for that. Maybe 2-3 out of the 75 I’ve identified specifically ask if you’re submitting elsewhere at all. The rest don’t ask (half use the QueryTracker system, which has fixed input fields; I’ve never seen that asked there, for sure.) They just assume you do. ---
**Author:** ![Lightnin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lightnin/32/180_2.png) [@Lightnin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lightnin)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2026, 8:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-wrote-a-novel/1023789/58 "2026-01-08T20:35:36Z")
I sold a second story to CreepyPod, so now I’ve got Rituals and Silent Treatment. Still no idea on when they’ll be published, but I think Silent Treatment will be in October as part of their “31 Days of Halloween” series. ---
**Author:** ![RickJay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/bb73d2/32.png) [@RickJay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RickJay)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2026, 3:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-wrote-a-novel/1023789/59 "2026-01-09T03:13:28Z")
I have to start targeting the podcast sites. I have some decent choices for them. It’s odd- my BEST stories don’t get picked up, and least not so far. ---
**Author:** ![stopnonstop](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/5f9b8f/32.png) [@stopnonstop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/stopnonstop)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2026, 10:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-wrote-a-novel/1023789/60 "2026-01-09T22:59:43Z")
It’s unfortunate that your best haven’t been picked up because I’d like to read them - your less than best are strong. I was recently speaking with my friend’s husband who makes a living as a writer. His collection of short stories which are solid and really good, took ten years to get published. They were too ‘literary’ , he was told. Other works, which he considers lesser, got published far quicker. He called literary agents gatekeepers, in that they think they know what the public wants. They want submissions to replicate previous successes. I think that people in the industry love art and good writing, but at the end of the day, business is business. I’m pulling for your success. Keep this thread going by letting us know about your struggles towards recognition. I, and I hope others who are interested in the process of getting published, will contribute to the conversation. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-wrote-a-novel/1023789.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-wrote-a-novel/1023789.md?page=4)