# Ideas for office mischief **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [August 14, 2003, 8:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ideas-for-office-mischief/195236 "2003-08-14T20:47:14Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Lobsang](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lobsang/32/4067_2.png) [@Lobsang](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lobsang)\ **Post date:** [August 15, 2003, 8:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ideas-for-office-mischief/195236/41 "2003-08-15T20:15:31Z")
Just remembered another of my step-dad’s. They used to work at the ‘citizen’s advice beauro’. There was this drunk who kept asking for the key to some community centre where he can sleep or something. the cmty cntr never agreed to this so my step-dad compromised and gave the phone number of the centre to the drunk, so that he could ring up and say he’s coming, so that they would be ready with the door open (they wouldn’t, they just ignore the call and wait for him to knock). Thing is, the number he gave wasn’t the cmty centre’s, it was his friend’s house. His friend would come into work desheveled, and when asked what’s wrong he’d say "I am worried, this rough-sounding guy keeps ringing us up in the middle of the night and saying ‘get ready, I’m coming in’ " ---
**Author:** ![MissTake](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/misstake/32/3189_2.png) [@MissTake](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MissTake)\ **Post date:** [August 15, 2003, 8:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ideas-for-office-mischief/195236/42 "2003-08-15T20:35:51Z")
Let’s see- I’ve taped a partially opened can of sardines under a cow-orkers desk. Painfully smelly, but funny. One of my cow-orkers has a menagerie of Winnie-the-Pooh characters at her desk. Akin to froggie, I like to rearrange them. Put them X-rated positions. Pooh doing Eeyore just isn’t right. Flip desk drawers upside down. Stolen from an episode of Drew Carey, but it works beautifully. And a bad one I have done on occasion: One of my dear friends is VERY stressed with his job. So I prank call him. Act like a client who cannot understand him. Add an obscure accent. Ask questions that have nothing to do with anything. I enjoy it. ---
**Author:** ![emmaliminal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7bcc69/32.png) [@emmaliminal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/emmaliminal)\ **Post date:** [August 15, 2003, 8:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ideas-for-office-mischief/195236/43 "2003-08-15T20:39:42Z")
You people are all very, very nasty. I’m taking notes. I once did a NICE mischief. I worked in a small office with all men except me and my friend – we’ll call her, um, Beth. Beth was very shy and self-effacing around most people; the guys owned the company and we were their only employees, and they were boisterous award-winning creative software types, etc. etc., and she was always apologizing for being so stupid or slow or prone to mistakes (none of which she was; she’s a genius). But they let her work like a slave whenever it was convenient for them – all the time, basically, since they were lousy at planning and deadlines. She spent a lot of time huddled at her desk in the corner with earphones on, working her butt off for these guys and getting no credit for it. We were on Macs, which make it easy to replace “system event” sounds… one day I replaced her “error alert” beep tone with the first line of the chorus from Lyle Lovett’s “I Love Everybody, Especially You”. Yay! ---
**Author:** ![ENugent](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/4af34b/32.png) [@ENugent](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ENugent)\ **Post date:** [August 15, 2003, 8:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ideas-for-office-mischief/195236/44 "2003-08-15T20:55:17Z")
Oh, that reminds me of a relatively nice one that I pulled. For reasons that would take a while to explain, everyone in our department bought Barbie dolls recently, except one ex-Navy guy who got a GI Joe instead. He was out for a couple of weeks due to a death in the family. When he returned, GI Joe was in the middle of his desk, with four Barbies hugging him. He left the tableau for a week or so, and then returned our Barbies along with some very cute stuffed animals. ---
**Author:** ![kputt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/f475e1/32.png) [@kputt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kputt)\ **Post date:** [August 15, 2003, 9:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ideas-for-office-mischief/195236/45 "2003-08-15T21:04:16Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Lobsang \* > \*\*I am often tempted to move the keys around on the keyboards, or mess about with MS word’s autocorrect feature so that ‘the’ is replaced with ‘teh’ (or ‘I am watchingg youoo’) > > Those would probably backfire though. > > What small but clever ideas do you have for mischief? Nothing erm, silly like replace the water in the water cooler with parrafin. Just things that will make a few people laugh (and hopefully my boss lose his mind) \*\* How do you mess with MS word’s autocorrect feature to do that? ---
**Author:** ![emmaliminal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7bcc69/32.png) [@emmaliminal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/emmaliminal)\ **Post date:** [August 15, 2003, 9:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ideas-for-office-mischief/195236/46 "2003-08-15T21:08:16Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by ENugent \* > \*\*…everyone in our department bought Barbie dolls recently, except one ex-Navy guy who got a GI Joe instead. He was out for a couple of weeks due to a death in the family. When he returned, GI Joe was in the middle of his desk, with four Barbies hugging him… \*\* Aw, geez. I’m all verklempt here. Dang, that’s a really good one. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![DeVena](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/dec6dc/32.png) [@DeVena](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DeVena)\ **Post date:** [August 15, 2003, 9:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ideas-for-office-mischief/195236/47 "2003-08-15T21:33:59Z")
All our desks are exactly the same. I once switched out my center drawer and file drawer with someone else’s desk and locked them. At least an hour of trying to get in the desk before she admitted she needed help. Then I gave her the key. ---
**Author:** ![3.885AM](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/3/58956e/32.png) [@3.885AM](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/3.885AM)\ **Post date:** [August 15, 2003, 10:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ideas-for-office-mischief/195236/48 "2003-08-15T22:44:40Z")
A former boss once had a stuffed frog on his credenza. One Friday night I abducted it and took a picture of it, blindfolded and being held at gun point. The next Monday I sent the picture and a ransom note by interoffice mail. Had great fun for the next couple of weeks negotiating payment and the return of the captive, he never could prove who was responsible. ---
**Author:** ![Lobsang](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lobsang/32/4067_2.png) [@Lobsang](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lobsang)\ **Post date:** [August 15, 2003, 11:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ideas-for-office-mischief/195236/49 "2003-08-15T23:02:34Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by kputt \* > \*\*How do you mess with MS word’s autocorrect feature to do that? \*\* Go to tools menu, then autocorrect options (you might need to hover over the arrow at the bottom of the menu to show hidden menu items) You should have a ‘Replace’ box and a ‘with’ box. That bit’s self explanatory. ---
**Author:** ![Iteki](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/eada6e/32.png) [@Iteki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Iteki)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2003, 12:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ideas-for-office-mischief/195236/50 "2003-08-17T00:29:58Z")
A simple enough one is to lower the arm-rests on somones chair, shove the chair under the desk as one one when leaving at the end of the day, and then raise the arm-rests again. Most desks have a metal bar around the edge underneath. I have seen somone screw apart their chair to get it out… They weren’t much good at thinking “outside the box”. ---
**Author:** ![Lobsang](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lobsang/32/4067_2.png) [@Lobsang](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lobsang)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2003, 12:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ideas-for-office-mischief/195236/51 "2003-08-17T00:32:31Z")
Do you think it would be possible to re-wire a mouse so that left=right and vice versa? That would be fun to watch. ---
**Author:** ![AbbySthrnAccent](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/eb9ed0/32.png) [@AbbySthrnAccent](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AbbySthrnAccent)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2003, 12:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ideas-for-office-mischief/195236/52 "2003-08-17T00:49:41Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by jormundgondir \* > -Raise all the chairs in the office a little bit too high This one sends on of my office mates into fits of frustration and anger. She has a special chair because of a weak back and any time people sit in it they adjust the height. The depth of her displeasure when this happens, would ruin any fun one might think they would get out of a prank. ---
**Author:** ![BuckleberryFerry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/5f9b8f/32.png) [@BuckleberryFerry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BuckleberryFerry)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2003, 12:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ideas-for-office-mischief/195236/53 "2003-08-17T00:52:59Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Lobsang \* > \*\*Do you think it would be possible to re-wire a mouse so that left=right and vice versa? That would be fun to watch. \*\* Can’t you change that in the control panel? Or is that too short-term for you? ---
**Author:** ![Lobsang](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lobsang/32/4067_2.png) [@Lobsang](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lobsang)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2003, 1:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ideas-for-office-mischief/195236/54 "2003-08-17T01:16:17Z")
I mean - when you move the mouse to the left - the pointer moves to the right. I am not refering to the buttons. ---
**Author:** ![BuckleberryFerry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/5f9b8f/32.png) [@BuckleberryFerry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BuckleberryFerry)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2003, 1:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ideas-for-office-mischief/195236/55 "2003-08-17T01:21:34Z")
Oh. :putz: I just figured that changing it in the control panel would be to easy to find and change back for your liking. Forgive me! ---
**Author:** ![Beryl\_Mooncalf\_1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/9f8e36/32.png) [@Beryl\_Mooncalf\_1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beryl_Mooncalf_1)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2003, 2:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ideas-for-office-mischief/195236/56 "2003-08-17T02:16:18Z")
> [@](#): > > _Lobsang posted_ I mean - when you move the mouse to the left - the pointer moves to the right. I am not referring to the buttons. All you should have to do is go to the ctrl pnl and access the mouse setup. Depending on the kind of mouse there is typically a setup feature, that has you follow the instructions, move up, move left, etc. You do the opposite. Also go to the button setup and reverse the buttons. We have done this many times, it is the funniest thing seeing the user using both hands on the mouse and leaning as s/he tries to get it to go where it is suppose to. If you have to reset it, you’ll appreciate how strange it is. ---
**Author:** ![Etherman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/958977/32.png) [@Etherman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Etherman)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2003, 2:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ideas-for-office-mischief/195236/57 "2003-08-17T02:18:30Z")
There is a “hack” utility out there that allows you to put your own messages on the readouts of HP printers. I use this to annoy cow-orkers. Change the message to read something like “stop that” or “don’t touch me.” I suppose you could get obscene too, but why? The look of confusion on everyone else’s face when someone asks “Why is the printer telling me to leave it alone?” is priceless. Some of the models have 3 lines available to use. Anybody got any good printer Haiku I can use? ---
**Author:** ![Lobsang](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lobsang/32/4067_2.png) [@Lobsang](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lobsang)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2003, 2:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ideas-for-office-mischief/195236/58 "2003-08-17T02:21:46Z")
What you describe sounds like calibration. I have never seen a calibration feature (outside of a game) for the mouse. Only for joysticks. I just went to the crrl panel and didn’t find anything. ---
**Author:** ![Ephemera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8baadc/32.png) [@Ephemera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ephemera)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2003, 3:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ideas-for-office-mischief/195236/59 "2003-08-17T03:49:53Z")
Maybe set the double click feature to its fastest setting? It’s next to impossible to use it while set that high and most people would never think to check the settings and would instead assume their mouse is FUBAR. ---
**Author:** ![Monstre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e274bd/32.png) [@Monstre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Monstre)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2003, 8:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ideas-for-office-mischief/195236/60 "2003-08-19T20:42:17Z")
At a former job, the systems guys pulled on one my supervisor – they set up her computer to beep incessantly when she started up. When she called Systems for support, they told her she needed to “count the beeps” – saying that the number of beeps would tell them what the error was. She lost count around 49 or 50… [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ideas-for-office-mischief/195236.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ideas-for-office-mischief/195236.md?page=4)