# Ideas for picketing Fred Phelps' funeral, when it eventually happens **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [April 8, 2005, 5:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ideas-for-picketing-fred-phelps-funeral-when-it-eventually-happens/298355 "2005-04-08T05:53:47Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 12\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Scott\_Plaid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/258eb7/32.png) [@Scott\_Plaid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scott_Plaid)\ **Post date:** [April 8, 2005, 4:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ideas-for-picketing-fred-phelps-funeral-when-it-eventually-happens/298355/21 "2005-04-08T16:16:36Z")
> [@Podkayne](#): > > I’m picturing a silent protest with nice big signs saying, “To Fred’s friends and loved ones: We are deeply sorry for your loss.” Podkayne, my mature side, as seen [here](http://teemingmillions.com/gallery/People), agrees with you, but :: he spins around, and suddenly an actor, playing a small kid version of him is standing there, wearing an oversized version of his clothing, like in those frosted mini-wheats commercials from the 80s:: but the immature side of me thinks that taunting his family, who seems to feel the same way he does, is a great idea. ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [April 8, 2005, 4:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ideas-for-picketing-fred-phelps-funeral-when-it-eventually-happens/298355/22 "2005-04-08T16:44:10Z")
> [@Left Hand of Dorkness](#): > > Couldn’t someone organize a broadway musical number with top hats and tails and dancing girls, all elaborately mourning his loss? I mean, it’s long past time that God Hates Fags got set to Rogers & Hammerstein. > > Daniel Oh I want to go simply when I go, And they’ll give me a simple funeral there I know. With a hundred strolling strings And topless dancers in golden wings Oh take me when I’m gone to Forest Lawn. While I don’t think that Tom Paxton\* was thinking guys when he wrote this song, I’m sure he wouldn’t mind using chorus boys. \*No, not John Denver. ---
**Author:** ![Larry\_Borgia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/larry_borgia/32/156_2.png) [@Larry\_Borgia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Borgia)\ **Post date:** [April 8, 2005, 4:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ideas-for-picketing-fred-phelps-funeral-when-it-eventually-happens/298355/23 "2005-04-08T16:54:54Z")
I have a feeling his family may do a Jonestown when he goes. Based on the article **Guinastasia** posted in [thread=310004]this thread[/thread], and comments by **Baker** , who seems to live in the same general vicinity, his family is so totally psychologically dependant on him, that they may not be able to continue living without him. ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [April 8, 2005, 5:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ideas-for-picketing-fred-phelps-funeral-when-it-eventually-happens/298355/24 "2005-04-08T17:06:50Z")
Fred’ll get his when he dies, goes up to heaven for judgement, looks up, and realizes God is wearing rouge and lipstick. ---
**Author:** ![Baker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bb73d2/32.png) [@Baker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Baker)\ **Post date:** [April 8, 2005, 5:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ideas-for-picketing-fred-phelps-funeral-when-it-eventually-happens/298355/25 "2005-04-08T17:53:53Z")
Yep, **Larry Borgia** , my house is within two miles of Phred’s. I see the WBC oh, about every other Sunday at my own church, and at other places in between. But I rather think that when Phred goes there will be an eventual breakup. And it will be messy, and that big property that several have their houses on will be a plum that they may fight over. I don’t know what current current financial arrangements they have though. And there could be a power struggle for control of WBC. My guess, and it’s only a guess, would be between a son-in-law of Fred, named Charles Hockenbarger, Jonathan Phelps(his third son), and, as a dark horse, Margie, his second oldest daughter. She may be the brightest of the older siblings, but as a woman she’s been held back from a leadership role. She does, however, act as a sort of family spokesperson, to the newspaper and the press. ---
**Author:** ![Ranchoth](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ranchoth/32/1066_2.png) [@Ranchoth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ranchoth)\ **Post date:** [April 8, 2005, 11:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ideas-for-picketing-fred-phelps-funeral-when-it-eventually-happens/298355/26 "2005-04-08T23:41:12Z")
> [@Scott\_plaid](#): > > Well, I think we should have signs pointing out the indesputable fact that [god hates figs](http://www.godhatesfigs.com/)." BAH! Everyone knows that [God hates **rags.**](http://www.godhatesrags.com/2index.html) ---
**Author:** ![Larry\_Borgia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/larry_borgia/32/156_2.png) [@Larry\_Borgia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Borgia)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2005, 2:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ideas-for-picketing-fred-phelps-funeral-when-it-eventually-happens/298355/27 "2005-04-09T02:20:40Z")
> [@Baker](#): > > Yep, **Larry Borgia** , my house is within two miles of Phred’s. I see the WBC oh, about every other Sunday at my own church, and at other places in between. > > But I rather think that when Phred goes there will be an eventual breakup. And it will be messy, and that big property that several have their houses on will be a plum that they may fight over. I don’t know what current current financial arrangements they have though. And there could be a power struggle for control of WBC. My guess, and it’s only a guess, would be between a son-in-law of Fred, named Charles Hockenbarger, Jonathan Phelps(his third son), and, as a dark horse, Margie, his second oldest daughter. She may be the brightest of the older siblings, but as a woman she’s been held back from a leadership role. She does, however, act as a sort of family spokesperson, to the newspaper and the press. Well, you know more than I do. Did you read “Addicted to Hate,” **Baker**? I’m curious if it jibes with your experiences and knowledge of the Phelps brood. ---
**Author:** ![astorian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ad7895/32.png) [@astorian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astorian)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2005, 2:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ideas-for-picketing-fred-phelps-funeral-when-it-eventually-happens/298355/28 "2005-04-09T02:45:23Z")
Never mind what happens AT his funeral- here’s an idea to HASTEN the day of his funeral. I think we need a letter-writing campaign to appeal to 1. his ego 2. his supposedly high moral standards 3. the usual fear of being called a wussy It could go something like this: Dear Freddie: ``` We Christians are REALLLY freaking impressed by the way you intrude on the grieving families of dead homosexuals. But surely, your courage and willingness to "tell it like it is" are being wasted on such petty sinners. We think a man of your stature owes it to the Christian community to make a stand where it really counts. As you are doubtlessly aware, most leading Mafia dons are devout Catholics. And when they die (or are "rubbed out" or "whacked," toi use their parlance) their friends and families like holding gaudy funerals and elaborate burial services at which everyone says confidently that the deceased- a scummy, lifelong thief and murderer- is now in Heaven. Is this right? Is this fair? We think not. And this is where a brave, principled soul like yourself comes in. The next time a member of the Genovese or Gambino crime family is killed, we want, no, we **demand** your presence at his funeral and his burial service. We want to see you and your noble followers standing at a Brookly gravesite holding up ROCCO 'THE NECK' GRAZIANO BURNS IN HELL posters. And, the next time some of L.A.'s Crips gun down a few few Bllods in a drive by over drug turf, we **expect** to see you at the cemetery holding up JAMAL WASHINGTON BURNS IN Hell banners. You've made your point about the Sodomites admirably. It's time you moved on to bigger fish. You don't have a problem with that, do you? Yours in Christ's Love, The Dopers ``` ---
**Author:** ![tomndebb](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b9e5f3/32.png) [@tomndebb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tomndebb)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2005, 5:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ideas-for-picketing-fred-phelps-funeral-when-it-eventually-happens/298355/29 "2005-04-09T05:18:01Z")
I’m not sure why anyone want s to picket his funeral. I would think most folks, here, would turn out to celebrate it. (I also think that the act that would most upset his family/followers would be to show up and demonstrate Christian compassion, but a celebration comes in a good second.) ---
**Author:** ![TJdude825](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/dec6dc/32.png) [@TJdude825](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TJdude825)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2005, 6:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ideas-for-picketing-fred-phelps-funeral-when-it-eventually-happens/298355/30 "2005-04-09T18:05:39Z")
Yeah, I certainly don’t intend to go out to Kansas for that. It’s just fun to talk about. I’m sure someone will do something at the funeral, and there’s no need to add to that too much. So this is really more of a “What if” thread than a planning thread. ---
**Author:** ![Polycarp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/82dd89/32.png) [@Polycarp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Polycarp)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2005, 6:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ideas-for-picketing-fred-phelps-funeral-when-it-eventually-happens/298355/31 "2005-04-09T18:52:14Z")
**Baker** has the right attitude. But if you do picket anyway, I can’t think of a better thing to put on the signs than a stark Bible quote, specifically Matthew 7:1-2 > [@](#): > > Judge not, that ye be not judged. For with what judgment ye judge, ye shall be judged: and with what measure ye mete, it shall be measured to you again. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2005, 8:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ideas-for-picketing-fred-phelps-funeral-when-it-eventually-happens/298355/32 "2005-04-09T20:00:12Z")
> [@Polycarp](#): > > **Baker** has the right attitude. > > But if you do picket anyway, I can’t think of a better thing to put on the signs than a stark Bible quote, specifically Matthew 7:1-2 Or better yet: “Forgive him, Father, he knows not what he does.” [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ideas-for-picketing-fred-phelps-funeral-when-it-eventually-happens/298355.md?page=1)