# Idiots who Think Eating Pizza with a Fork and Knife is Gay

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/idiots-who-think-eating-pizza-with-a-fork-and-knife-is-gay/648250>\
**Category:** The BBQ Pit\
**Created:** [January 24, 2013, 8:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/idiots-who-think-eating-pizza-with-a-fork-and-knife-is-gay/648250 "2013-01-24T20:03:04Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 10

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**Author:** ![SCAdian](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/scadian/32/3292_2.png) [@SCAdian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SCAdian)\
**Post date:** [January 27, 2013, 5:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/idiots-who-think-eating-pizza-with-a-fork-and-knife-is-gay/648250/181 "2013-01-27T05:24:25Z")

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> [@zoid](#):
>
> How in the hell did my IP address get banned fron a site I’ve never been to?

Your reputation, it spreadeth…

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**Author:** ![billfish678](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7bcc69/32.png) [@billfish678](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/billfish678)\
**Post date:** [January 27, 2013, 5:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/idiots-who-think-eating-pizza-with-a-fork-and-knife-is-gay/648250/182 "2013-01-27T05:28:38Z")

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> [@Darth\_Panda](#):
>
> I eat pizza with a spoon and a melon baller. I think I might be bi.

Thats how Wilford Brimley ate his. Just sayin.

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**Author:** ![AClockworkMelon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aclockworkmelon/32/10803_2.png) [@AClockworkMelon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AClockworkMelon)\
**Post date:** [January 27, 2013, 5:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/idiots-who-think-eating-pizza-with-a-fork-and-knife-is-gay/648250/183 "2013-01-27T05:45:46Z")

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> [@Spud](#):
>
> Well, life handed me a real life opportunity to test this out. I currently have 7 15 year old freshmen in my basement (they are there voluntarily… one is my son). They wanted pizza and I asked what kind and they ordered two cheese and one supreme. Not a veggie pizza in the bunch. After I picked it up and called them up to “come and get it” I actually asked if anyone wanted a knife and fork… they looked at me like I had a third eye. Nobody took me up on it.
> 
> The sample consisted of four boys and three girls… the boys specifically invited these girls over so I’m pretty sure at least 6 of the 7 are not gay.
> 
> So, straight guys and girls don’t eat veggie pizza nor use a knife and fork. Even one who is questionable doesn’t do it either. So, based on this, eating veggie pizza with a knife and fork is not typical straight 15 year old behavior.
> 
> Science doesn’t lie… sorry, but you better let your Dad know you are gay.
> 
> Oh, and as I’m typing this, my son and one of the girls just came up and got a can of whipped cream from the fridge. Definitely not gay.

Good to know.

> [@Spud](#):
>
> (and yes, I’ll be heading down to check on things in a minute or two).

Good to know dad’s not gay either.

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**Author:** ![johnpost](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/f17d59/32.png) [@johnpost](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/johnpost)\
**Post date:** [January 27, 2013, 6:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/idiots-who-think-eating-pizza-with-a-fork-and-knife-is-gay/648250/184 "2013-01-27T06:17:46Z")

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> [@Spud](#):
>
> Oh, and as I’m typing this, my son and one of the girls just came up and got a can of whipped cream from the fridge. Definitely not gay. (and yes, I’ll be heading down to check on things in a minute or two).

they’re just licking cream off each other. good clean fun.

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**Author:** ![crowmanyclouds](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/crowmanyclouds/32/19884_2.png) [@crowmanyclouds](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/crowmanyclouds)\
**Post date:** [January 27, 2013, 6:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/idiots-who-think-eating-pizza-with-a-fork-and-knife-is-gay/648250/185 "2013-01-27T06:34:19Z")

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> [@Acsenray](#):
>
> … unless you specify, it is assumed that a hamburger has a bun.

Ernst Röhm’s last fatal, telling, mistake!  
(Few people know that the _Nacht-der Langen Messer (Night of the Long Knives)_ was originally the _Nacht der Langen Messer, der Gabeln, und der Löffel (Night of the Long Knives, the Forks, and the Spoons_). Which even the Germans thought was just too fucking long to say.)

CMC

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**Author:** ![Lucas\_Jackson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lucas_jackson/32/303_2.png) [@Lucas\_Jackson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lucas_Jackson)\
**Post date:** [January 27, 2013, 8:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/idiots-who-think-eating-pizza-with-a-fork-and-knife-is-gay/648250/186 "2013-01-27T08:59:07Z")

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> [@Anonymous User](#):
>
> I meant to say “thick skinned”. Anyways, I’m a freshman in high school - 15 years old.

You’ve misspelled a word in about half of your posts and I was having a little fun with you but since you brought it up… Are saying you can’t spell because you are only 15?

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**Author:** ![Ms\_Boods](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/5e9695/32.png) [@Ms\_Boods](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ms_Boods)\
**Post date:** [January 27, 2013, 9:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/idiots-who-think-eating-pizza-with-a-fork-and-knife-is-gay/648250/187 "2013-01-27T09:05:17Z")

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> [@White SIFL](#):
>
> You’ve misspelled a word in about half of your posts and I was having a little fun with you but since you brought it up… Are saying you can’t spell because you are only 15?

No, he’s misspelling words because his hands are full of cultery. I get totally an Edward Scissorhands vibe here.

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**Author:** ![Malacandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Malacandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malacandra)\
**Post date:** [January 27, 2013, 2:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/idiots-who-think-eating-pizza-with-a-fork-and-knife-is-gay/648250/188 "2013-01-27T14:48:15Z")

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> [@Ms\_Boods](#):
>
> No, he’s misspelling words because his hands are full of cultery. I get totally an Edward Scissorhands vibe here.

You got to watch those cults.

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**Author:** ![Ms\_Boods](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/5e9695/32.png) [@Ms\_Boods](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ms_Boods)\
**Post date:** [January 27, 2013, 2:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/idiots-who-think-eating-pizza-with-a-fork-and-knife-is-gay/648250/189 "2013-01-27T14:59:11Z")

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> [@Malacandra](#):
>
> You got to watch those cults.

Which is why I didn’t get into MIT.

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**Author:** ![R3d\_Anonymous](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/aeb1de/32.png) [@R3d\_Anonymous](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/R3d_Anonymous)\
**Post date:** [January 27, 2013, 3:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/idiots-who-think-eating-pizza-with-a-fork-and-knife-is-gay/648250/190 "2013-01-27T15:01:46Z")

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> [@White SIFL](#):
>
> You’ve misspelled a word in about half of your posts and I was having a little fun with you but since you brought it up… Are saying you can’t spell because you are only 15?

No it is because I was on a phone. Nowadays, usually I don’t make mistakes like those, but in this thread I for a little careless since I was sometimes on my phone in a hurry.

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**Author:** ![Spud](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spud/32/347_2.png) [@Spud](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spud)\
**Post date:** [January 27, 2013, 3:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/idiots-who-think-eating-pizza-with-a-fork-and-knife-is-gay/648250/191 "2013-01-27T15:13:06Z")

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Are you in a hurry now?

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**Author:** ![Morgenstern](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Morgenstern](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morgenstern)\
**Post date:** [January 27, 2013, 3:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/idiots-who-think-eating-pizza-with-a-fork-and-knife-is-gay/648250/192 "2013-01-27T15:33:53Z")

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> [@Anonymous User](#):
>
> No it is because I was on a phone. Nowadays, usually I don’t make mistakes like those, but in this thread I for a little careless since I was sometimes on my phone in a hurry.

You know you’re lucky mayhem on a sentence isn’t a felony.

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**Author:** ![Ravenman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ravenman/32/2929_2.png) [@Ravenman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ravenman)\
**Post date:** [January 27, 2013, 4:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/idiots-who-think-eating-pizza-with-a-fork-and-knife-is-gay/648250/193 "2013-01-27T16:00:11Z")

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> [@Anonymous User](#):
>
> No it is because I was on a phone. Nowadays, usually I don’t make mistakes like those, but in this thread I for a little careless since I was sometimes on my phone in a hurry.

Just to let you know how most adults read that sentiment: “I didn’t make mistakes because I’m stupid. I made mistakes because I didn’t supply any effort! So quit criticizing me!”

Solution: Just fucking pay attention to what you’re doing.

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**Author:** ![Acsenray](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/acsenray/32/4519_2.png) [@Acsenray](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Acsenray)\
**Post date:** [January 27, 2013, 4:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/idiots-who-think-eating-pizza-with-a-fork-and-knife-is-gay/648250/194 "2013-01-27T16:07:27Z")

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That’s not really fair. I’m a professional writer and editor and a stickler for spelling but autocorrect on my phone trips me up all the time.

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**Author:** ![R3d\_Anonymous](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/aeb1de/32.png) [@R3d\_Anonymous](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/R3d_Anonymous)\
**Post date:** [January 27, 2013, 4:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/idiots-who-think-eating-pizza-with-a-fork-and-knife-is-gay/648250/195 "2013-01-27T16:25:52Z")

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Alright alright. Fine, I will pay more attention to what I am doing when I am on mobile devices. It is just that sometimes I am in a rush to get things done, so I guess I just won’t post until I get a better time where I can pay attention to what I am writing.

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**Author:** ![Great\_Antibob](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/e47c2d/32.png) [@Great\_Antibob](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Great_Antibob)\
**Post date:** [January 27, 2013, 4:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/idiots-who-think-eating-pizza-with-a-fork-and-knife-is-gay/648250/196 "2013-01-27T16:57:23Z")

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> [@Anonymous User](#):
>
> It is just that sometimes I am in a rush to get things done, so I guess I just won’t post until I get a better time where I can pay attention to what I am writing.

Apply that to EVERYTHING you do. Half-assing things is a bad way to go through life. The fact you don’t understand that reflects poorly on you.

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**Author:** ![Lucas\_Jackson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lucas_jackson/32/303_2.png) [@Lucas\_Jackson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lucas_Jackson)\
**Post date:** [January 27, 2013, 4:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/idiots-who-think-eating-pizza-with-a-fork-and-knife-is-gay/648250/197 "2013-01-27T16:59:26Z")

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> [@Acsenray](#):
>
> That’s not really fair. I’m a professional writer and editor and a stickler for spelling but autocorrect on my phone trips me up all the time.

With all due respect did you read post #190? My own posts will probably show examples of my phone autocorrecting me but it never rearranges the word order or types grammatical gibberish.

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**Author:** ![Darth\_Panda](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ee7513/32.png) [@Darth\_Panda](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darth_Panda)\
**Post date:** [January 27, 2013, 5:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/idiots-who-think-eating-pizza-with-a-fork-and-knife-is-gay/648250/198 "2013-01-27T17:04:11Z")

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> [@Great\_Antibob](#):
>
> Half-assing things is a bad way to go through life.

[Not according to my spirit guide.](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0vbI-P6mFbg)

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**Author:** ![PandaBear77](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/edb3f5/32.png) [@PandaBear77](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PandaBear77)\
**Post date:** [January 27, 2013, 7:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/idiots-who-think-eating-pizza-with-a-fork-and-knife-is-gay/648250/199 "2013-01-27T19:02:55Z")

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Eating pizza with a fork and knife doesn’t make you gay. Just a pussy, is all.

😉

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**Author:** ![billfish678](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7bcc69/32.png) [@billfish678](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/billfish678)\
**Post date:** [January 27, 2013, 10:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/idiots-who-think-eating-pizza-with-a-fork-and-knife-is-gay/648250/200 "2013-01-27T22:21:43Z")

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> [@Great\_Antibob](#):
>
> Apply that to EVERYTHING you do. Half-assing things is a bad way to go through life. The fact you don’t understand that reflects poorly on you.

Yes, full-assing everything you do REALLY is the way to go. You’ll be amazed at how much free time you have and how rarely people ask you to do things for them.

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