# If a stranger approached you in the locker room, and asked you to rub lotion on his/her back.... **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [March 18, 2016, 7:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-stranger-approached-you-in-the-locker-room-and-asked-you-to-rub-lotion-on-his-her-back/749441 "2016-03-18T19:58:32Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Doctor\_Jackson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doctor_jackson/32/32_2.png) [@Doctor\_Jackson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doctor_Jackson)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2016, 6:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-stranger-approached-you-in-the-locker-room-and-asked-you-to-rub-lotion-on-his-her-back/749441/41 "2016-03-21T18:35:02Z")
I voted “Other”. It’s all in the [strike]wrist[/strike] context. I can envision a few situations where it would not be an issue, but I can also envision many situations where it would. ---
**Author:** ![Oakminster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/77aa72/32.png) [@Oakminster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oakminster)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2016, 7:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-stranger-approached-you-in-the-locker-room-and-asked-you-to-rub-lotion-on-his-her-back/749441/42 "2016-03-21T19:03:47Z")
> [@John\_Mace](#): > > But what’s a woman doing in the men’s locker room? I have seen several 70s era documentaries where this seems to cause spontaneous affection and electric guitar riffs… That noted, I ain’t playing. Male or female. Way outta my comfort zone. Gotta go now. ---
**Author:** ![Lemur866](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lemur866/32/434_2.png) [@Lemur866](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lemur866)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2016, 7:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-stranger-approached-you-in-the-locker-room-and-asked-you-to-rub-lotion-on-his-her-back/749441/44 "2016-03-21T19:16:37Z")
> [@Drunky\_Smurf](#): > > I grow my own locker rooms at home and they are much tastier than what you can buy at the store. They keep setting em up, you keep knocking em down. ---
**Author:** ![kayT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayt/32/3633_2.png) [@kayT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayT)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2016, 7:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-stranger-approached-you-in-the-locker-room-and-asked-you-to-rub-lotion-on-his-her-back/749441/45 "2016-03-21T19:41:32Z")
I would not do it, but I can’t help wondering how we would turn the person down. As a “well brought up” woman I am constitutionally unable to say a flat no to anyone. Even with a beggar on the street, I will either pretend I didn’t see or hear the person, or I will say, “sorry, can’t help you” or something. Can’t just say no. So, person in the locker room: I am allergic to a lot of different products, especially sunscreen or fragrances, so I’d just say sorry, I’m allergic to that. It has the benefit of being less rude than plain no, plus it’s (mostly) true. Others: can you just say “no” and walk away? If so: why? Because the person is rude to ask and thus doesn’t deserve courtesy? or? ---
**Author:** ![TroutMan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/troutman/32/6721_2.png) [@TroutMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TroutMan)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2016, 7:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-stranger-approached-you-in-the-locker-room-and-asked-you-to-rub-lotion-on-his-her-back/749441/46 "2016-03-21T19:54:50Z")
I can courteously say “I’m sorry, I don’t feel comfortable doing that.” ---
**Author:** ![wolfpup](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wolfpup/32/10618_2.png) [@wolfpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wolfpup)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2016, 8:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-stranger-approached-you-in-the-locker-room-and-asked-you-to-rub-lotion-on-his-her-back/749441/47 "2016-03-21T20:12:16Z")
> [@John\_Mace](#): > > If it was a woman, yes. A guy, probably not. > > But what’s a woman doing in the men’s locker room? Perhaps it’s a locker room along the lines of the sauna our Swedish friend was once describing. 😉 Honestly, there’s always some exceptional circumstance, and I’m not averse to helping out a genuine need, but in most cases I suspect I would suddenly remember that I urgently need to be someplace. ---
**Author:** ![SurrenderDorothy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/surrenderdorothy/32/1221_2.png) [@SurrenderDorothy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SurrenderDorothy)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2016, 3:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-stranger-approached-you-in-the-locker-room-and-asked-you-to-rub-lotion-on-his-her-back/749441/48 "2016-03-22T03:47:48Z")
I really don’t think I’d have a problem with it at all, assuming everything was otherwise normal. I mean, if she was moaning or covered in scorpions or something, then I’d probably be a bit more wary of the situation, but otherwise… why not? ---
**Author:** ![outlierrn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/outlierrn/32/3005_2.png) [@outlierrn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/outlierrn)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2016, 6:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-stranger-approached-you-in-the-locker-room-and-asked-you-to-rub-lotion-on-his-her-back/749441/49 "2016-03-22T06:08:39Z")
> [@Hail\_Ants](#): > > Let me say what every guy is thinking: Not only would none of us do it, but all of us would be very put off just by being asked. It would be near impossible to not take that request as a sexual come-on. Ya know, it’s _checks forum_ a mistake to speak for every guy on the dope. ---
**Author:** ![Pantastic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/3bc359/32.png) [@Pantastic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pantastic)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2016, 2:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-stranger-approached-you-in-the-locker-room-and-asked-you-to-rub-lotion-on-his-her-back/749441/50 "2016-03-22T14:25:20Z")
> [@TroutMan](#): > > It’s not so much that I’d mind doing it; it’s that any normal person would know it wasn’t an appropriate request for a stranger, so something isn’t right with the guy or his reasons for asking. That’s my reason for being on guard. It’s just so wildly outside of normal bounds for a men’s locker room that it just screams ‘danger Will Robinson’. Either something is off with the guy, or he’s making a blatant sexual come-on (which also means something is probably off with him, as that’s pretty dangerous in this context). Also, I personally don’t spend any time just hanging around the locker room, so they’re going to be making the request either when I’m not fully clothed or when I’m directly on my way in/out, which makes it even more off-putting. Also, I don’t use lotion and don’t want to be feeling some random person’s lotion on MY skin for the next few hours. That stuff doesn’t usually wash off easily. Even at a basic ‘am I willing to do this ignoring the inappropriateness’ I’m inclined to say no. ---
**Author:** ![JustinC](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/justinc/32/8083_2.png) [@JustinC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JustinC)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2016, 5:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-stranger-approached-you-in-the-locker-room-and-asked-you-to-rub-lotion-on-his-her-back/749441/51 "2016-03-22T17:47:53Z")
If it’s so difficult to apply, why is this dude taking it with him to a locker room? Either it’s an ‘emergency’ dose of cream (yeah, _right_) or he anticipated asking someone. On a beach if he’s going lobster red it’s probably too late anyway and he should get in the shade and under a cool shower, if he’s obviously alone at the beach and asks nicely and apologetically… maybe. ---
**Author:** ![Scumpup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ce73a5/32.png) [@Scumpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scumpup)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2016, 5:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-stranger-approached-you-in-the-locker-room-and-asked-you-to-rub-lotion-on-his-her-back/749441/52 "2016-03-22T17:54:51Z")
I’m not rubbing anything on anybody in the locker room. ---
**Author:** ![filmore](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/7993a0/32.png) [@filmore](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/filmore)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2016, 5:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-stranger-approached-you-in-the-locker-room-and-asked-you-to-rub-lotion-on-his-her-back/749441/53 "2016-03-22T17:59:54Z")
Now that we’re on the second page… I’m dying to know the backstory of this thread. Did someone ask you to put lotion on their back? Did you ask someone to do it to you? ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2016, 6:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-stranger-approached-you-in-the-locker-room-and-asked-you-to-rub-lotion-on-his-her-back/749441/54 "2016-03-22T18:01:01Z")
My gf occasionally asks that I rub moisturizer on her back. I always scrub my hands immediately afterwards. She once asked me why and I explained that I’m already too moist. ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2016, 6:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-stranger-approached-you-in-the-locker-room-and-asked-you-to-rub-lotion-on-his-her-back/749441/55 "2016-03-22T18:03:51Z")
> [@kayT](#): > > I would not do it, but I can’t help wondering how we would turn the person down. As a “well brought up” woman I am constitutionally unable to say a flat no to anyone. Even with a beggar on the street, I will either pretend I didn’t see or hear the person, or I will say, “sorry, can’t help you” or something. Can’t just say no. So, person in the locker room: I am allergic to a lot of different products, especially sunscreen or fragrances, so I’d just say sorry, I’m allergic to that. It has the benefit of being less rude than plain no, plus it’s (mostly) true. > > Others: can you just say “no” and walk away? If so: why? Because the person is rude to ask and thus doesn’t deserve courtesy? or? “No, I’m sorry, I’m not comfortable doing that.” Everyone must learn to say no, it’s the most valuable skill! ---
**Author:** ![kayT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayt/32/3633_2.png) [@kayT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayT)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2016, 7:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-stranger-approached-you-in-the-locker-room-and-asked-you-to-rub-lotion-on-his-her-back/749441/56 "2016-03-22T19:30:36Z")
Yes, and I can say no, I have xxx reason. What I can’t do is just say “no.” There are those who can and I sort of envy them! ---
**Author:** ![VunderBob](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/839c29/32.png) [@VunderBob](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VunderBob)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2016, 7:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-stranger-approached-you-in-the-locker-room-and-asked-you-to-rub-lotion-on-his-her-back/749441/57 "2016-03-22T19:37:01Z")
If what he wanted spread is something I could identify as a topical medication, yes. Moisturizer or sun screen? **BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!** ---
**Author:** ![Helena330](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/helena330/32/531_2.png) [@Helena330](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Helena330)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2016, 8:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-stranger-approached-you-in-the-locker-room-and-asked-you-to-rub-lotion-on-his-her-back/749441/58 "2016-03-22T20:56:29Z")
I’m a woman. Yes. It’s not a big deal. ---
**Author:** ![Grrr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grrr/32/146_2.png) [@Grrr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grrr)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2016, 9:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-stranger-approached-you-in-the-locker-room-and-asked-you-to-rub-lotion-on-his-her-back/749441/59 "2016-03-22T21:23:46Z")
> [@filmore](#): > > Now that we’re on the second page… I’m dying to know the backstory of this thread. Did someone ask you to put lotion on their back? Did you ask someone to do it to you? No nothing like that. I was just curious as to what degree, women are more comfortable with touching each other than men. It’s interesting to note, that women have more or less been tied from the start of this thread. ---
**Author:** ![CarnalK](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnalk/32/486_2.png) [@CarnalK](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CarnalK)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2016, 9:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-stranger-approached-you-in-the-locker-room-and-asked-you-to-rub-lotion-on-his-her-back/749441/60 "2016-03-22T21:50:49Z")
> [@outlierrn](#): > > Ya know, it’s _checks forum_ a mistake to speak for every guy on the dope. Yeah! _checks poll results_ He’s only speaking for 90% of the guys! ---
**Author:** ![Hail\_Ants](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/dc4da7/32.png) [@Hail\_Ants](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hail_Ants)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2016, 11:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-stranger-approached-you-in-the-locker-room-and-asked-you-to-rub-lotion-on-his-her-back/749441/61 "2016-03-22T23:01:49Z")
> [@outlierrn](#): > > Ya know, it’s _checks forum_ a mistake to speak for every guy on the dope. > [@CarnalK](#): > > Yeah! _checks poll results_ He’s only speaking for 90% of the guys! Yeah I know, I meant to write ‘every straight guy’ but since the OP didn’t specify sexual preference I took it as read… [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-stranger-approached-you-in-the-locker-room-and-asked-you-to-rub-lotion-on-his-her-back/749441.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-stranger-approached-you-in-the-locker-room-and-asked-you-to-rub-lotion-on-his-her-back/749441.md?page=4)