# If A Superhero Were To Appear IRL **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [July 11, 2003, 7:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-superhero-were-to-appear-irl/187666 "2003-07-11T07:09:58Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Tuckerfan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@Tuckerfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tuckerfan)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2003, 7:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-superhero-were-to-appear-irl/187666/1 "2003-07-11T07:09:58Z")
Inspired by this thread on[killing a superhero](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?s=&threadid=196734), I got to thinking about what would happen if someone with super powers (like Superman or Wonder Woman, not a gadget guru like Batman) appeared in the real world. How many people do you think would say that the superhero was the Anti-Christ? How many would say that he/she was the Messiah? How many would recognize the person for what they were and decided that _they_ had to be a supervillian to counteract the superhero? ---
**Author:** ![Vlad\_Dracul](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/50afbb/32.png) [@Vlad\_Dracul](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Vlad_Dracul)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2003, 8:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-superhero-were-to-appear-irl/187666/2 "2003-07-11T08:22:24Z")
Unless he was incredibly careful, the government would find out who he really was, and would hound him mercilessly in its quest to bring him under its control. Add in the cults devoted to him, the cults devoted to destroying him, the pending lawsuits (“Thanks for saving my life, Superman, but did you have to crash through my wall?”), the unauthorized tell-all biographies and so forth, and it appears his life would be pretty miserable. ---
**Author:** ![Odinoneeye](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/97f17d/32.png) [@Odinoneeye](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Odinoneeye)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2003, 10:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-superhero-were-to-appear-irl/187666/3 "2003-07-11T10:36:18Z")
Alan Moore once said that if a truly powerful superhero like Superman really existed, he would either become detached from humanity or he would set himself up as God. Dr. Manhattan of the Watchmen did the first, Miracleman did the second. There would probably be lots of people who would despise the hero just because the human race would no longer be the apex of life. Not that we necessarily are, but we like to think that way. ---
**Author:** ![E-Sabbath](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/e19adc/32.png) [@E-Sabbath](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/E-Sabbath)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2003, 11:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-superhero-were-to-appear-irl/187666/4 "2003-07-11T11:10:37Z")
A: 1 Million Dollars from Randi. B: Commercial Endorsements. C: REALLY in depth research to replicate his powers. ---
**Author:** ![One\_And\_Only\_Wanderers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/838e76/32.png) [@One\_And\_Only\_Wanderers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/One_And_Only_Wanderers)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2003, 1:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-superhero-were-to-appear-irl/187666/5 "2003-07-11T13:29:17Z")
Heh imagine the money whore super hero. “I’m either going to call myself Pepsiman or Cokeman… Let the bidding commence!” Or am i too cynical? 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Exapno\_Mapcase](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/exapno_mapcase/32/1051_2.png) [@Exapno\_Mapcase](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Exapno_Mapcase)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2003, 1:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-superhero-were-to-appear-irl/187666/6 "2003-07-11T13:56:00Z")
IRL, the bad guys wouldn’t set up elaborate traps to hold him while they explained their plans in great detail. They’d just kill him right off. From a distance. ---
**Author:** ![mobo85](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b19c9b/32.png) [@mobo85](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mobo85)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2003, 2:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-superhero-were-to-appear-irl/187666/7 "2003-07-11T14:11:23Z")
There was an American Express ad with Jerry Seinfeld and his favorite superhero, Superman, walking down the street. Superman explains to Jerry that he doesn’t usually sign autographs-“Usually, they ask me to bend stuff.” That’s what I’m thinking would happen. People know superheroes so well in the comic books, they’d ask them for the autograph or whatever (after asking “Are you really…?”) People would probably ask “Could you use your X-ray vision/spin your web/harness me in your lasso of truth/etc.?” since Americans are stupid and they’ll stop in their tracks for a celebrity. And what’s a superhero but a celebrity with heat vision? ---
**Author:** ![Electronic\_Chaos](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/bbe5ce/32.png) [@Electronic\_Chaos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Electronic_Chaos)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2003, 3:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-superhero-were-to-appear-irl/187666/8 "2003-07-11T15:19:44Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Carl\_A\_Norris \* > \*\*Heh imagine the money whore super hero. > > “I’m either going to call myself Pepsiman or Cokeman… Let the bidding commence!” > > Or am i too cynical? > > 🙂 \*\* Just go rent Mystery Men, that’s basically what happend to Captain Amazing. ---
**Author:** ![Hey\_It\_s\_That\_Guy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/6f9a4e/32.png) [@Hey\_It\_s\_That\_Guy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hey_It_s_That_Guy)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2003, 8:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-superhero-were-to-appear-irl/187666/9 "2003-07-11T20:28:21Z")
Or the Patriot from Rising Stars, or Booster Gold and the Conglomerate… ---
**Author:** ![Intaglio](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/71e660/32.png) [@Intaglio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Intaglio)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2003, 8:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-superhero-were-to-appear-irl/187666/10 "2003-07-11T20:34:28Z")
I would hope to meet Wonder Woman and ingratiate myself to her, be her friend become adopted by the Amazons and fight with her (Ala Wonder Girl) and get training/abilities and special weapons that would be cool. ---
**Author:** ![shy\_guy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a6a055/32.png) [@shy\_guy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/shy_guy)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2003, 10:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-superhero-were-to-appear-irl/187666/11 "2003-07-11T22:56:39Z")
> [@](#): > > I would hope to meet Wonder Woman and ingratiate myself to her, be her friend become adopted by the Amazons I dunno, becoming a member of the Wonder Woman supporting cast ensures that you will, in fact, die a grisly, pointless death at some point. Either that, or you completely fade into limbo. ---
**Author:** ![tracer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tracer/32/20578_2.png) [@tracer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tracer)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2003, 12:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-superhero-were-to-appear-irl/187666/12 "2003-07-12T00:48:31Z")
Yeah, but in the process, you might be able to convince Wonder Woman to, ahem, tie you up with her magic lasso. ( 😉 ;), nudge nudge) ---
**Author:** ![Ranchoth](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ranchoth/32/1066_2.png) [@Ranchoth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ranchoth)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2003, 12:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-superhero-were-to-appear-irl/187666/13 "2003-07-12T00:49:39Z")
Just think…what would happen if the Superhero appeared, but “alone”? That is, no counterpart supervillains, no “buddy” superheroes, no sidekicks, no extraterrestrial threats…Just him. I mean, if any one of “us” had Superman’s powers, how many of us would still stand by and let developing nations be run by corrupt dictators? Or murderers or sex offenders escape prosecution on a legal technicality? ---
**Author:** ![tracer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tracer/32/20578_2.png) [@tracer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tracer)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2003, 1:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-superhero-were-to-appear-irl/187666/14 "2003-07-12T01:05:30Z")
If anyone came along with Superman’s powers, every government on Earth would be scrambling to get its hands on some Kryptonite really really fast. ---
**Author:** ![Mockingbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c68b51/32.png) [@Mockingbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mockingbird)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2003, 1:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-superhero-were-to-appear-irl/187666/15 "2003-07-12T01:09:15Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by tracer \* > \*\*Yeah, but in the process, you might be able to convince Wonder Woman to, ahem, tie you up with her magic lasso. ( 😉 ;), nudge nudge) \*\* Yeah… that’s twice today that original fantasy has been laid out. :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![tracer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tracer/32/20578_2.png) [@tracer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tracer)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2003, 1:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-superhero-were-to-appear-irl/187666/16 "2003-07-12T01:12:47Z")
Hey, don’t knock it. On the History Channel’s 2-hour _Comic Book Superheroes_ show this week, they pretty much laid on the table the fact that Wonder Woman’s powers-don’t-work-when-her-hands-are-bound-by-men limitation was a bondage fantasy. ---
**Author:** ![tracer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tracer/32/20578_2.png) [@tracer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tracer)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2003, 1:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-superhero-were-to-appear-irl/187666/17 "2003-07-12T01:14:18Z")
… meaning that the authors of the early _Wonder Woman_ comics knew full well what they were doing, and realized that such things would slip past the naive sensibilities of the average reader who’d never heard of bondage fantasies. ---
**Author:** ![Tuckerfan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@Tuckerfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tuckerfan)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2003, 3:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-superhero-were-to-appear-irl/187666/18 "2003-07-12T03:40:49Z")
Or, as a friend of mine liked to point out: What was Wonder Woman’s main power? She tied men up and made them tell the truth. Now, what does _that_ remind you of? ---
**Author:** ![Ephemera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8baadc/32.png) [@Ephemera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ephemera)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2003, 4:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-superhero-were-to-appear-irl/187666/19 "2003-07-12T04:31:41Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Ranchoth \* > \*\*Just think…what would happen if the Superhero appeared, but “alone”? That is, no counterpart supervillains, no “buddy” superheroes, no sidekicks, no extraterrestrial threats…Just him. > > I mean, if any one of “us” had Superman’s powers, how many of us would still stand by and let developing nations be run by corrupt dictators? Or murderers or sex offenders escape prosecution on a legal technicality? \*\* Pfft! If I had his powers, I’d _be_ one of those dictators but it wouldn’t be in some third world country. I’m thinking either the US or a country or two in Western Europe would be ideal. ---
**Author:** ![Odinoneeye](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/97f17d/32.png) [@Odinoneeye](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Odinoneeye)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2003, 4:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-superhero-were-to-appear-irl/187666/20 "2003-07-12T04:38:02Z")
Why take over a country? I would take over one of the Hawaiian islands then tell the goverments of the earth what I wanted. If they didn’t bring them to me, I’d reduce them to ash. I would let them handle their own affairs. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-superhero-were-to-appear-irl/187666.md?page=2)