# If a tree crashed into you **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [June 30, 2010, 4:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-tree-crashed-into-you/545034 "2010-06-30T04:38:39Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Punisher\_11B](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/9de0a6/32.png) [@Punisher\_11B](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Punisher_11B)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2010, 4:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-tree-crashed-into-you/545034/1 "2010-06-30T04:38:39Z")
I have had this question asked to me and I have asked it, and it has always ended up in a debate. If you were driving home late one night alone and a tree uprooted and jumped on the road in front of you, and you hit it demolishing your car. After, the tree climbed back into it’s hole the way it was before. Would You Tell Anybody Exactly What Happened, or Lie??? ---
**Author:** ![Try2B\_Comprehensive](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/try2b_comprehensive/32/65_2.png) [@Try2B\_Comprehensive](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Try2B_Comprehensive)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2010, 4:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-tree-crashed-into-you/545034/2 "2010-06-30T04:45:34Z")
Lie. ---
**Author:** ![Simplicio](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c37758/32.png) [@Simplicio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Simplicio)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2010, 4:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-tree-crashed-into-you/545034/3 "2010-06-30T04:50:01Z")
Assume I was hallucinating and go see a Dr. ---
**Author:** ![Alessan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alessan/32/465_2.png) [@Alessan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alessan)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2010, 4:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-tree-crashed-into-you/545034/4 "2010-06-30T04:52:55Z")
Tell no one. Kill the tree with fire. ---
**Author:** ![Duckster](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/duckster/32/1244_2.png) [@Duckster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Duckster)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2010, 5:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-tree-crashed-into-you/545034/5 "2010-06-30T05:16:48Z")
I think that plant with the rather strong trunk isn’t an oak burning in your fireplace. ---
**Author:** ![Der\_Trihs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/der_trihs/32/233_2.png) [@Der\_Trihs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Der_Trihs)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2010, 5:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-tree-crashed-into-you/545034/6 "2010-06-30T05:35:52Z")
I’d lie, and assume it was a hallucination; if nothing else equally bizarre “happened” I’d assume it was a one time thing. ---
**Author:** ![Malacandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Malacandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malacandra)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2010, 6:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-tree-crashed-into-you/545034/7 "2010-06-30T06:18:33Z")
That wouldn’t be a tree, just a bush.An ambush ---
**Author:** ![Sage\_Rat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sage_rat/32/399_2.png) [@Sage\_Rat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sage_Rat)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2010, 6:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-tree-crashed-into-you/545034/8 "2010-06-30T06:22:32Z")
I’d tell people what it “seemed” like I had seen – emphasizing that I didn’t believe it to be real – and go see the doctor to have my head examined. ---
**Author:** ![Kobal2](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kobal2/32/20_2.png) [@Kobal2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kobal2)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2010, 6:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-tree-crashed-into-you/545034/9 "2010-06-30T06:49:51Z")
The Ents ! The Ents are marching ! And… being rather petty, it seems. ---
**Author:** ![GIGObuster](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gigobuster/32/421_2.png) [@GIGObuster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GIGObuster)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2010, 6:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-tree-crashed-into-you/545034/10 "2010-06-30T06:52:57Z")
> [@Kobal2](#): > > The Ents ! The Ents are marching ! And… being rather petty, it seems. Darn it, beat me to it. ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2010, 10:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-tree-crashed-into-you/545034/11 "2010-06-30T10:53:36Z")
I think this is more of an IMHO topic. Moved from Great Debates. ---
**Author:** ![BrotherCadfael](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/977dab/32.png) [@BrotherCadfael](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrotherCadfael)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2010, 11:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-tree-crashed-into-you/545034/12 "2010-06-30T11:14:36Z")
> [@Malacandra](#): > > That wouldn’t be a tree, just a bush.An ambush It’s bush’s fault. ---
**Author:** ![Machine\_Elf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/82dd89/32.png) [@Machine\_Elf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Machine_Elf)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2010, 12:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-tree-crashed-into-you/545034/13 "2010-06-30T12:21:05Z")
> [@Kobal2](#): > > The Ents ! The Ents are marching ! And… being rather petty, it seems. Run, Forest, Run! ---
**Author:** ![Superhal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b4bc9f/32.png) [@Superhal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Superhal)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2010, 12:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-tree-crashed-into-you/545034/14 "2010-06-30T12:51:03Z")
I’m not sure if I’d tell anybody, but you can be damn sure I’ll be buying a chainsaw the next day. ---
**Author:** ![badbadrubberpiggy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/57b2e6/32.png) [@badbadrubberpiggy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/badbadrubberpiggy)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2010, 1:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-tree-crashed-into-you/545034/15 "2010-06-30T13:22:20Z")
Get to the nearest emergency room and tell the doctor what I thought I had seen. Maybe I really saw it, but telling people that would just be a great way to end up in an asylum. And if I didn’t see it, but it seemed so real I thought it really happened, then it’s probably a good time for a CAT scan. ---
**Author:** ![Smeghead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f1d935/32.png) [@Smeghead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Smeghead)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2010, 1:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-tree-crashed-into-you/545034/16 "2010-06-30T13:34:53Z")
I don’t know what I’d do, but I do know this: I’ve have my PhD project figured out in a damn hurry. ---
**Author:** ![Nzinga\_Seated](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/b5ac83/32.png) [@Nzinga\_Seated](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nzinga_Seated)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2010, 1:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-tree-crashed-into-you/545034/17 "2010-06-30T13:40:23Z")
I wouldn’t tell anyone, but I would go home and google to see if anyone else had such a thing happen with a tree. What if I found an online community dedicated to those who have been attacked by trees?? Do I join the community of wackjobs? ---
**Author:** ![Punisher\_11B](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/9de0a6/32.png) [@Punisher\_11B](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Punisher_11B)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2010, 1:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-tree-crashed-into-you/545034/18 "2010-06-30T13:45:12Z")
> [@Nzinga\_Seated](#): > > I wouldn’t tell anyone, but I would go home and google to see if anyone else had such a thing happen with a tree. What if I found an online community dedicated to those who have been attacked by trees?? Do I join the community of wackjobs? I guess it would be like the groups of people that Swear that they have been abducted by Aliens, we all think they are wacked. Good point. I would maybe make an anonymous username, tell my story and see what they say. ---
**Author:** ![FordTaurusSHO94](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/f07891/32.png) [@FordTaurusSHO94](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FordTaurusSHO94)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2010, 1:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-tree-crashed-into-you/545034/19 "2010-06-30T13:47:02Z")
A tree jumped out in front of the car in front of me once. It was one of those times that I wish I could have recorded for the future. What started out as a possible serious situation got more and more hillbilly as the minutes went by. When my friend and I left, we had to pull over we were laughing and crying so hard. Here’s some of the memorable quotes: “I was just takin my boy down the road a sam-mitch.” “Hell, I ramped the sumbitch!” When I asked if he wanted to use my phone - “We… don’t… do… that.” “It’s my brother’s car!” ---
**Author:** ![pbbth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f9ae1b/32.png) [@pbbth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pbbth)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2010, 2:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-tree-crashed-into-you/545034/20 "2010-06-30T14:14:53Z")
Once I determined that I was not dying from the accident the first thing I would do is get a good distance away from that tree (as far as I could drive while still within sight of the tree) and start going through my glove box, trunk, under my seats, etc. looking for things that seem out of place. If there is all of the sudden a weapon there that wasn’t there before or a map that I had never seen previously I would assume I was supposed to go on a quest of some kind and keep an eye out for other people who appeared to have been attacked by trees recently so we could join forces. If, after searching, everything seems normal except the tree that can run around causing destruction but has not moved again since I pulled over I would mark my spot on the road somehow and check myself in the hospital and tell them I believe I was hallucinating. If my hospital tests come back clean and I don’t show anything that would indicate I should be hallucinating moving trees then I go back to that same spot with a chainsaw and check out the tree to see what is going on with it. If it seems normal and doesn’t appear to have been uprooted in the last couple of days I’ll leave it alone, but if the roots are exposed or if I have another reason to believe it really did uproot itself and attack me for no apparent reason I hack it to kindling and make a bonfire out of it. Either way I don’t admit to anyone that the tree moved out in front of me unless it appears to be an epidemic of some kind. Except my fiance, I would tell him about it so he could either help me in my defense against trees or keep an eye on me for other signs of insanity. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-tree-crashed-into-you/545034.md?page=2)