# If a tree crashed into you **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [June 30, 2010, 4:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-tree-crashed-into-you/545034 "2010-06-30T04:38:39Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Nzinga\_Seated](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/b5ac83/32.png) [@Nzinga\_Seated](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nzinga_Seated)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2010, 2:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-tree-crashed-into-you/545034/21 "2010-06-30T14:23:52Z")
Pbbth, I’m getting the feeling this isn’t your first tree attack. ---
**Author:** ![Malleus\_Incus\_Stapes](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/malleus_incus_stapes/32/3293_2.png) [@Malleus\_Incus\_Stapes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malleus_Incus_Stapes)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2010, 2:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-tree-crashed-into-you/545034/22 "2010-06-30T14:24:22Z")
I’d call Durkon Thundershield for back-up. ---
**Author:** ![Asimovian](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/asimovian/32/172_2.png) [@Asimovian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Asimovian)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2010, 2:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-tree-crashed-into-you/545034/23 "2010-06-30T14:42:50Z")
Oh, c’mon. NO ONE is going to call the cops and get them out to the scene right away? You know, they’ve got forensics teams that can determine you weren’t drunk/high and that you hit _something_ in the middle of the road! Maybe they’d even be able to match the paint chips from your totaled vehicle to the damage on the bastard tree! Where are Mulder and Scully when you need them? ---
**Author:** ![Rhythmdvl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/85f322/32.png) [@Rhythmdvl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rhythmdvl)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2010, 2:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-tree-crashed-into-you/545034/24 "2010-06-30T14:44:15Z")
If you lied about it but no one was in the room at the time, would you have made a sound? ---
**Author:** ![MeanOldLady](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/meanoldlady/32/10737_2.png) [@MeanOldLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MeanOldLady)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2010, 2:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-tree-crashed-into-you/545034/25 "2010-06-30T14:44:49Z")
> [@Alessan](#): > > Tell no one. > > Kill the tree with fire. Bingo. Bastard tree. ---
**Author:** ![Punisher\_11B](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/9de0a6/32.png) [@Punisher\_11B](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Punisher_11B)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2010, 2:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-tree-crashed-into-you/545034/26 "2010-06-30T14:48:04Z")
> [@Rhythmdvl](#): > > If you lied about it but no one was in the room at the time, would you have made a sound? Yes, you would hear your self. ---
**Author:** ![pbbth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f9ae1b/32.png) [@pbbth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pbbth)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2010, 2:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-tree-crashed-into-you/545034/27 "2010-06-30T14:53:14Z")
> [@Asimovian](#): > > Oh, c’mon. NO ONE is going to call the cops and get them out to the scene right away? You know, they’ve got forensics teams that can determine you weren’t drunk/high and that you hit _something_ in the middle of the road! Maybe they’d even be able to match the paint chips from your totaled vehicle to the damage on the bastard tree! > > Where are Mulder and Scully when you need them? IMO this solution only works if you have a Mulder and Scully type of investigative team that works quickly, efficiently, and is inclined to believe you when you say something supernatural happened on that road. Otherwise this is an 8-10 week investigation that may end up going nowhere at all while that bastard tree is attacking other innocent people or, og forbid, determined to destroy you specifically and following you around. ---
**Author:** ![Punisher\_11B](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/9de0a6/32.png) [@Punisher\_11B](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Punisher_11B)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2010, 2:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-tree-crashed-into-you/545034/28 "2010-06-30T14:56:51Z")
> [@pbbth](#): > > IMO this solution only works if you have a Mulder and Scully type of investigative team that works quickly, efficiently, and is inclined to believe you when you say something supernatural happened on that road. Otherwise this is an 8-10 week investigation that may end up going nowhere at all while that bastard tree is attacking other innocent people or, og forbid, determined to destroy you specifically and following you around. Scully NEVER believes Mulder until she sees it for herself and then always tries to disprove it even after seeing it. ---
**Author:** ![aceplace57](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aceplace57/32/3500_2.png) [@aceplace57](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aceplace57)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2010, 3:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-tree-crashed-into-you/545034/29 "2010-06-30T15:08:42Z")
I have to ask, If a tree falls on you, crushes your skull and no one else is around. Does it make a sound? 😉 There’s no one around to hear it fall. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Ferret\_Herder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e47774/32.png) [@Ferret\_Herder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ferret_Herder)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2010, 3:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-tree-crashed-into-you/545034/30 "2010-06-30T15:09:36Z")
> [@Nzinga\_Seated](#): > > Pbbth, I’m getting the feeling this isn’t your first tree attack. Or is writing the next “Worse Case Scenario” handbook - if it has “car is ambushed by tree” as an entry, we’ll know! ---
**Author:** ![Oakminster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/77aa72/32.png) [@Oakminster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oakminster)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2010, 3:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-tree-crashed-into-you/545034/31 "2010-06-30T15:10:45Z")
Being a semi-druidic atheist, I’ll be checking out Treebeard. If he’ll talk to me, I’ll tell him I reckon the orcs are on the march, and he oughta do something useful. Meanwhile, I got to go chunk my high school graduation ring in a volcano, just to be safe… ---
**Author:** ![Punisher\_11B](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/9de0a6/32.png) [@Punisher\_11B](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Punisher_11B)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2010, 3:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-tree-crashed-into-you/545034/32 "2010-06-30T15:16:17Z")
> [@aceplace57](#): > > I have to ask, > > If a tree falls on you, crushes your skull and no one else is around. Does it make a sound? 😉 > > There’s no one around to hear it fall. 😉 Hmmm, Scratches head… ---
**Author:** ![Attack\_from\_the\_3rd\_dimension](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b38774/32.png) [@Attack\_from\_the\_3rd\_dimension](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Attack_from_the_3rd_dimension)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2010, 3:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-tree-crashed-into-you/545034/33 "2010-06-30T15:21:59Z")
> [@Nzinga\_Seated](#): > > I wouldn’t tell anyone, but I would go home and google to see if anyone else had such a thing happen with a tree. What if I found an online community dedicated to those who have been attacked by trees?? Do I join the community of wackjobs? Of course now all you would find would be this thread…and you’ve already joined this community of wackjobs. ---
**Author:** ![Asimovian](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/asimovian/32/172_2.png) [@Asimovian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Asimovian)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2010, 3:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-tree-crashed-into-you/545034/34 "2010-06-30T15:27:37Z")
> [@pbbth](#): > > Otherwise this is an 8-10 week investigation that may end up going nowhere at all while that bastard tree is attacking other innocent people or, og forbid, determined to destroy you specifically and following you around. A tree with a vendetta. I like it. Very Hollywood. What’s the tree’s motivation? ---
**Author:** ![aceplace57](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aceplace57/32/3500_2.png) [@aceplace57](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aceplace57)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2010, 3:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-tree-crashed-into-you/545034/35 "2010-06-30T15:28:34Z")
I remember this story from a few years ago. > [@](#): > > A tall Redwood tree struck and killed a woman and her small Chihuahua mix when it split about 100 feet above ground in high winds and tumbled down on the pair Monday night in Boulder Creek, Santa Cruz County Coroner Sgt. Larry Roland said. [http://www.ktvu.com/news/7473195/detail.html](http://www.ktvu.com/news/7473195/detail.html) Poor woman takes her dog out for a walk and gets killed. ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2010, 3:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-tree-crashed-into-you/545034/36 "2010-06-30T15:36:02Z")
> [@Nzinga\_Seated](#): > > I wouldn’t tell anyone, but I would go home and google to see if anyone else had such a thing happen with a tree. What if I found an online community dedicated to those who have been attacked by trees?? Do I join the community of wackjobs? You already have. And I understand that their having a discussion on this very topic right now. ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2010, 8:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-tree-crashed-into-you/545034/37 "2010-06-30T20:10:04Z")
> [@aceplace57](#): > > I remember this story from a few years ago. > > [http://www.ktvu.com/news/7473195/detail.html](http://www.ktvu.com/news/7473195/detail.html) > > Poor woman takes her dog out for a walk and gets killed. Why, in the old days that’d be material for _Ripley’s Be-leaf It or Not!_ ---
**Author:** ![moldybread](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ea924/32.png) [@moldybread](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/moldybread)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2010, 8:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-tree-crashed-into-you/545034/38 "2010-06-30T20:35:15Z")
I’d wonder if I looked like sarumon that day. “There is no curse in elvish, entish, or the tongues of men for this treachery!” ---
**Author:** ![Malacandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Malacandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malacandra)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2010, 9:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-tree-crashed-into-you/545034/39 "2010-06-30T21:38:34Z")
I’d sic the copse on it. ---
**Author:** ![FloatyGimpy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/floatygimpy/32/7750_2.png) [@FloatyGimpy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FloatyGimpy)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2010, 9:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-tree-crashed-into-you/545034/40 "2010-06-30T21:48:29Z")
With a story like that, I think I’d be pretty poplar. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-tree-crashed-into-you/545034.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-tree-crashed-into-you/545034.md?page=3)