# If a woman has a past relationship with a black man she's tainted forever. Why? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [July 5, 2013, 6:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-woman-has-a-past-relationship-with-a-black-man-shes-tainted-forever-why/662743 "2013-07-05T18:45:38Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 17
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2015, 8:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-woman-has-a-past-relationship-with-a-black-man-shes-tainted-forever-why/662743/321 "2015-03-23T20:45:51Z")
Ignoring the side discussion with our extremely racist friend, I had another thought about this. The couple of men whom I knew who had this viewpoint - that is, that women were tainted after they’d slept with a black man - didn’t really make it out to be a physical thing. In fact it was usually one of these: 1. She didn’t really like black men, she was just dating them to get revenge on Daddy. 2. She had low standards for what makes a good man, so she dated black men because she had poor self-esteem/was ignorant. 3. She was slutty, so she slept with anyone, including black men. 4. She was trying to make some kind of point about how inclusive she was (sorry, pun not intended), and how non-racist. That’s not to say that they didn’t also feel that she was tainted in some physical way, but those were the reasons they generally cited or felt. This is purely a musing post. I do not subscribe to any of the above views. ---
**Author:** ![wonky](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wonky/32/393_2.png) [@wonky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wonky)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2015, 9:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-woman-has-a-past-relationship-with-a-black-man-shes-tainted-forever-why/662743/322 "2015-03-23T21:00:54Z")
> [@Anaamika](#): > > That’s not to say that they didn’t also feel that she was tainted in some physical way, but those were the reasons they generally cited or felt. So, essentially “It’s inconceivable that a white woman would want to be with a black man because he’s a great person. Therefore, she must just be stupid/insane/PC/slutty/a bad person.” Whew! I guess I can cancel that Amazon order of “Taint-B-Gone.” ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2015, 9:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-woman-has-a-past-relationship-with-a-black-man-shes-tainted-forever-why/662743/323 "2015-03-23T21:51:26Z")
If anything, that’s _more_ offensive. Now it’s not only about how black men are inferior, or a “taint”, or whatever, but also about how women are incapable of making choices certain men don’t agree with unless they’re stupid, mentally ill, or trying to make a point. ---
**Author:** ![Lemur866](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lemur866/32/434_2.png) [@Lemur866](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lemur866)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2015, 10:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-woman-has-a-past-relationship-with-a-black-man-shes-tainted-forever-why/662743/324 "2015-03-23T22:49:19Z")
> [@Anaamika](#): > > Ignoring the side discussion with our extremely racist friend… [Your Racist Friend.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lHxEnQZi3Ow) ---
**Author:** ![Nawth\_Chucka](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/c57346/32.png) [@Nawth\_Chucka](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nawth_Chucka)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2015, 9:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-woman-has-a-past-relationship-with-a-black-man-shes-tainted-forever-why/662743/325 "2015-03-24T21:37:55Z")
> [@jsgoddess](#): > > So, essentially “It’s inconceivable that a white woman would want to be with a black man because he’s a great person. Therefore, she must just be stupid/insane/PC/slutty/a bad person.” > > Whew! **I guess I can cancel that Amazon order of “Taint-B-Gone.”** Thank you! I wondered why there was a sudden drop in price; now I can get a full case. :shakes her not-insignificant booty in delight: ---
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2015, 10:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-woman-has-a-past-relationship-with-a-black-man-shes-tainted-forever-why/662743/326 "2015-03-24T22:11:22Z")
Ulch - that dark meat was tainted! You feel deathly sick. ---
**Author:** ![piepiepie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/e47774/32.png) [@piepiepie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/piepiepie)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2015, 1:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-woman-has-a-past-relationship-with-a-black-man-shes-tainted-forever-why/662743/327 "2015-03-25T13:56:52Z")
> [@VinylTurnip](#): > > Ulch - that dark meat was tainted! You feel deathly sick. You used Taint-B-Gone. It’s super effective! ---
**Author:** ![randi25701](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/9fc348/32.png) [@randi25701](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/randi25701)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2015, 10:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-woman-has-a-past-relationship-with-a-black-man-shes-tainted-forever-why/662743/328 "2015-04-25T10:00:48Z")
> [@Amateur\_Barbarian](#): > > Let me approach an answer via a question. > > Can anyone point to a “first rate” (for lack of a better term) white woman who has publicly dated or married a black man? This may sound incredibly racist, but I sincerely don’t intend it to be. I just can’t think of a white woman who is attractive, self-confident and individually successful who has a black mate. The ones that come to mind are older, unattractive to some degree, have evident personal issues or bring nothing much to the relationship. > > Even if a counter-example or two can be found, especially in these (wonderfully) enlightened days, does anyone contend that I am wrong in a more general sense? > > So maybe subsequent lack of interest from white men is for other, pre-existing reasons. Wow! I am stunned by the (forgive me) degree of ignorance displayed in this question! I could name a ton of high profile white women who date (J Lo and Heidi Klum) and marry black men; My well educated cousin, and my mom amoung them. My black male friends tell me Iin Germany women line up to try them out. This I will say living in a redneck hotbed I do meet men who refer to women who have children by black men as having no respect for themselves. Knowing the women I would say these guys just don’t want to admit they are racist. Frankly I could care less who my girlfriend has dated. ---
**Author:** ![JustinC](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/justinc/32/8083_2.png) [@JustinC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JustinC)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2015, 1:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-woman-has-a-past-relationship-with-a-black-man-shes-tainted-forever-why/662743/329 "2015-04-25T13:06:08Z")
Well, this seems to be the thread where I can offer an unspoken theory and have it contradicted, without coming across as a racist asshole. The theory is thus; Guys who chase Asian women have small appendages Why do I have this theory? The size of prophylactics vary, depending on which country you’re in. ---
**Author:** ![HeXen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/c89c15/32.png) [@HeXen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HeXen)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2015, 1:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-woman-has-a-past-relationship-with-a-black-man-shes-tainted-forever-why/662743/330 "2015-04-25T13:53:34Z")
I knew a black guy years ago who hated mexicans and asians and considers any black woman tainted if been with either. Everyone’s different, nothing’s going to change. Reality is what it is so the often hypocritical justice league crowds might as well give it up. ---
**Author:** ![wonky](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wonky/32/393_2.png) [@wonky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wonky)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2015, 5:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-woman-has-a-past-relationship-with-a-black-man-shes-tainted-forever-why/662743/331 "2015-04-25T17:07:36Z")
> [@HeXen](#): > > I knew a black guy years ago who hated mexicans and asians and considers any black woman tainted if been with either. > Everyone’s different, nothing’s going to change. Reality is what it is so the often hypocritical justice league crowds might as well give it up. Things have changed a lot. Interracial relationships are becoming increasingly common. We’re winning. Racists are losing. They are losing slowly, but they are losing. “Nothing’s going to change” is demonstrably false. And you can’t insult me by saying I’m for justice. ---
**Author:** ![velomont](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/8491ac/32.png) [@velomont](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/velomont)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2015, 12:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-woman-has-a-past-relationship-with-a-black-man-shes-tainted-forever-why/662743/332 "2015-04-27T00:24:36Z")
> [@astro](#): > > In looking around the web and IRL there seems to be a number of white men who will not consider dating a white woman who has dated or had a past sexual relationship with a black man. In some cases if they find out about her interracial dating history only after they begin dating they will make something else up as to why they are bailing on the relationship. > > Obviously it’s racist on it’s face, but the strength of the attitude surprises me. Even fairly attractive and accomplished women are shunned as some sort of unclean trash if they have dated black men. I only see this attitude with respect to white men judging white women for dating black men. Possibly other scenarios exist, but this is the main one I see. This race centric judgment does not seem to be present for any other interracial hookups. > > Why does this extreme antipathy exist? While it’s obnoxiously racist it’s not just poor rednecks espousing this attitude. I’ve seen this attitude ranging from trailer parks to the executive suites. And oddly some people who have this attitude aren’t that overtly racist in real world behavior, it’s just that specific hookup scenario that makes them lock the doors on even considering women who have dated black men. > > Why the extreme attitude? I hate to say it but - cite? ---
**Author:** ![Charlie\_Tan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/charlie_tan/32/12582_2.png) [@Charlie\_Tan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Charlie_Tan)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2015, 11:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-woman-has-a-past-relationship-with-a-black-man-shes-tainted-forever-why/662743/333 "2015-07-18T23:33:05Z")
> [@Amateur\_Barbarian](#): > > If you think I’m wrong, fine… but I’m still waiting to meet such a couple that includes a woman I’d hit on. It all depends on the stock, right? I mean a young buck might wear out a good prospect for your ambitions. ---
**Author:** ![tnetennba](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/7993a0/32.png) [@tnetennba](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tnetennba)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2015, 11:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-woman-has-a-past-relationship-with-a-black-man-shes-tainted-forever-why/662743/334 "2015-07-18T23:51:10Z")
Has anybody ever known a woman who was remotely interested in an overweight, melon-headed, self-published sci-fi geek, if she wasn’t morally, spiritually, and economically broken, possibly meth-addicted, and definitely uglier than what my cat left in the bathtub? ---
**Author:** ![Inna\_Minnit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/5f8ce5/32.png) [@Inna\_Minnit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inna_Minnit)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2015, 12:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-woman-has-a-past-relationship-with-a-black-man-shes-tainted-forever-why/662743/335 "2015-07-19T00:51:44Z")
A man who thought this way might be racist. Or very insecure. Since “all” black dudes are hung (yes, I know, another stereotype) they probably fear they could never, ahem, _measure up._ ---
**Author:** ![Urbanredneck](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/ea5d25/32.png) [@Urbanredneck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Urbanredneck)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2015, 4:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-woman-has-a-past-relationship-with-a-black-man-shes-tainted-forever-why/662743/336 "2015-07-19T04:42:00Z")
I think it would depend on WHY she was dating him. It she was into “bling” and one of those nightclub girls who liked to hit on rap stars and athletes. Yeah. Or maybe she was just into him for the sex then yes. She is tainted. Now if she just found the guy to be good looking, funny, clever, interesting or whatever and they developed a good friendship from that, then I say no. He was just another guy. ---
**Author:** ![iiandyiiii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/iiandyiiii/32/7924_2.png) [@iiandyiiii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iiandyiiii)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2015, 12:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-woman-has-a-past-relationship-with-a-black-man-shes-tainted-forever-why/662743/337 "2015-07-19T12:31:31Z")
> [@Urbanredneck](#): > > Or maybe she was just into him for the sex then yes. She is tainted. Of course – who wants to be with a woman who is interested in sex, enjoys having sex, and (gasp!) sometimes has that great evil _casual sex_? :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![cmyk](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cmyk/32/3353_2.png) [@cmyk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cmyk)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2015, 5:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-woman-has-a-past-relationship-with-a-black-man-shes-tainted-forever-why/662743/338 "2015-07-19T17:14:08Z")
> [@Urbanredneck](#): > > I think it would depend on WHY she was dating him. It she was into “bling” and one of those nightclub girls who liked to hit on rap stars and athletes. Yeah. Or maybe she was just into him for the sex then yes. She is tainted. > > Now if she just found the guy to be good looking, funny, clever, interesting or whatever and they developed a good friendship from that, then I say no. He was just another guy. The International Consortium of the Study of Irrational Thought and Bigotry wants to know if you’d like to be a test subject, perhaps as one of their controls. They asked **drifter777** first, but his cloak and hood were held up at the dry cleaners. ---
**Author:** ![Urbanredneck](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/ea5d25/32.png) [@Urbanredneck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Urbanredneck)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2015, 10:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-woman-has-a-past-relationship-with-a-black-man-shes-tainted-forever-why/662743/339 "2015-07-19T22:03:40Z")
> [@cmyk](#): > > The International Consortium of the Study of Irrational Thought and Bigotry wants to know if you’d like to be a test subject, perhaps as one of their controls. > > They asked **drifter777** first, but his cloak and hood were held up at the dry cleaners. Your implying I’m a racist. Why? ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2015, 10:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-woman-has-a-past-relationship-with-a-black-man-shes-tainted-forever-why/662743/340 "2015-07-19T22:43:08Z")
Because you said a racist thing. I know, totally unfair, right? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-woman-has-a-past-relationship-with-a-black-man-shes-tainted-forever-why/662743.md?page=16) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-a-woman-has-a-past-relationship-with-a-black-man-shes-tainted-forever-why/662743.md?page=18)