# If an unmarried person dies in their house, how is their death discovered? **URL:** \ **Category:** Factual Questions\ **Created:** [December 1, 2018, 8:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-an-unmarried-person-dies-in-their-house-how-is-their-death-discovered/825410 "2018-12-01T20:22:55Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Teuton](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/teuton/32/3864_2.png) [@Teuton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Teuton)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2018, 5:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-an-unmarried-person-dies-in-their-house-how-is-their-death-discovered/825410/41 "2018-12-02T17:29:51Z")
> [@Quartz](#): > > This is a particular concern for me as I am retired, live alone, and have become perforce solitary by nature. Here in the UK the post workers notice if your mail is piling up. I mean, they might, but in my house at least you can’t see the mail piling up - there’s no glass in the door, and you could put an awful lot of mail through. Packages left might get noticed, but who’s ordering packages to you if you’re dead? ---
**Author:** ![edwardcoast](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/cab0a1/32.png) [@edwardcoast](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/edwardcoast)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2018, 5:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-an-unmarried-person-dies-in-their-house-how-is-their-death-discovered/825410/42 "2018-12-02T17:37:01Z")
> [@JessicaHoyt](#): > > Assume that they don’t have a live-in-boyfriend/girlfriend. And also that they don’t have any kids that live with them. (Either because their kids are grown or they never had any kids in the first place.) > > Since nobody else lives with them, it seems like a mystery how anybody would discover their death. > > How is such a person’s death discovered? And how long does discovering the death usually take? The postal carrier or someone from the utility company would likely see there is no activity there, mail isn’t being picked up, and there is no reply for unpaid utility bills. Unpaid utility bills usually cause the service to be cut-off and they would unlikely do that without contacting the owner. Especially during winter, I don’t think they would cut off utilities to deny someone heat because of an unpaid bill. The surroundings would get attention if the lawn isn’t being cared for someone might complain to the city and they would check things out. I read a story of a guy who lived alone and retired. He passed away in his home and it was about a week until the death was discovered. I think a family member was trying to get in touch with him and couldn’t. ---
**Author:** ![Dahu](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dahu/32/3416_2.png) [@Dahu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dahu)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2018, 5:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-an-unmarried-person-dies-in-their-house-how-is-their-death-discovered/825410/43 "2018-12-02T17:52:58Z")
You can’t always rely on the neighbours though. > **[Man spent dead neighbour's £6,000 on pizza](https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-northern-ireland-45837991)** > > A judge brands a Belfast man wicked for buying pepperoni pizzas on his dead neighbour's bank card. ---
**Author:** ![Irishman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/b487fb/32.png) [@Irishman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Irishman)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2018, 6:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-an-unmarried-person-dies-in-their-house-how-is-their-death-discovered/825410/44 "2018-12-02T18:00:29Z")
This happened with a guy from work. He failed to show up, they went to check on him and found him dead from a heart attack. It was a couple days (over a weekend). > [@ivylass](#): > > I worked with [Michelle Jones](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Charlie_Brandt). She had a _Sex and the City_ type friendship with her girlfriends…talking to them at least once a day. > > She didn’t show up at work. She didn’t meet her friends for a planned dinner. They stopped by the house and knocked on the door. When there was no answer, they went around to the garage and saw Charles Brandt’s body. They were the ones who called the police. Wow. That’s a wild six degrees kind of thing. > [@TSBG](#): > > My FIL, who is getting very frail, has an emergency device hanging around his neck that he can trigger with a single button push. This is in case he falls and can’t get up (yes, that’s really the risk). My parents’ elderly neighbor had one of those, and they were on the contact list from the company. They had to go over a few times and help her up. ---
**Author:** ![DesertDog](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/desertdog/32/11503_2.png) [@DesertDog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DesertDog)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2018, 6:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-an-unmarried-person-dies-in-their-house-how-is-their-death-discovered/825410/45 "2018-12-02T18:01:33Z")
> [@Beckdawrek](#): > > I worry about my pets too. I am afraid if I did the deadman switch thing it would send the message when I got myself locked in the laundry room, again. I just had to climb out of a shed window 2 days ago. I am a master at locking myself in or out of places. It’s the bain of my existence. I’m recalling a _Lake Woebegon_ story where a man, who’d been meaning to fix the latch on the inside, got stuck in a shed when the wind blew the door shut on him. His adult son opened the door and entered the shed to find out what the pounding was – and shut the door behind him. They busted out the small window in the door but couldn’t reach the outside latch. About then the wife/mother got in her car to go to work. One of them frantically waved through the window; she waved back and drove off. ---
**Author:** ![Loach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/loach/32/350_2.png) [@Loach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loach)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2018, 6:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-an-unmarried-person-dies-in-their-house-how-is-their-death-discovered/825410/46 "2018-12-02T18:06:19Z")
Like pkbites I’ve had multiple calls like this over the years. Its the logical things that most have mentioned. Mailman, Meals on Wheels, neighbor who realizes they haven’t seen neighbor in a while, family member not in the area calling it in, flies on the window… > [@GMANCANADA](#): > > I had a single co-worker with no relatives or significant other, die of a heart attack in his sleep. When he didn’t show up at work the next morning, his immediate co-workers became concerned. They drove to his house and his car was there so when he didn’t answer their knocks they called the police . > > The cops agreed there was reason for concern, but said he needed to be “missing” for a certain period of time before they could do anything official. So they couldn’t enter the house now _ **but** _ they did say they could enter the house and look around if someone spotted a sign of a potential crime, something like a broken window “for example”. > > My colleagues understood their message and when the police went out front to their car, they knocked out a back window and then reported to the cops in their car that they’d just spotted a broken window. The cops went in through the window, opened the door and searched and sadly found the guy dead. > > **Lastly, re: falling.** My wife & I were discussing the new Apple Watch Series 4. Its gyroscopes are so sensitive that they can detect not only a fall, but the type of fall you have, straight down, backwards or forwards. If the wearer doesn’t move for a minute, it will automatically call emergency services and/or your personal emergency contact. It also has an instant emergency contact call feature in case you fall and can’t get up. As another bonus it also has a built in Electro-cardiogram function. > > We’re thinking of getting one for her 83 year old dad who lives alone. We’re very worried about him falling and he has a bad heart. It’s expensive, but the costs of a single use & peace of mind justifies it somewhat. Plus, we’re told our doctor will accept the EKG from the unit at the same diagnostic validity as a lab one, so that also offsets the costs. > > Wrist sizes personal medical devices are certainly the future. There is no specific time limit. There just has to be enough exigent circumstances to make it an exception to the fourth amendment. At least as often, probably twice as often, instead of finding a dead body what we find is that they were out at the store, were visiting relatives for a week or in the hospital. We have to look at all the circumstances and not just kick in the door right away. ---
**Author:** ![pkbites](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pkbites/32/204_2.png) [@pkbites](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pkbites)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2018, 8:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-an-unmarried-person-dies-in-their-house-how-is-their-death-discovered/825410/47 "2018-12-02T20:49:13Z")
> [@Loach](#): > > At least as often, probably twice as often, instead of finding a dead body what we find is that they were out at the store, were visiting relatives for a week or in the hospital. We have to look at all the circumstances and not just kick in the door right away. Yeah, we’ve had a couple of times where things looked bad and it turned out to be something else. We went into a guys house where he didn’t show up for work or return calls for almost 2 weeks. He wasn’t there. Turned out someone screwed up and forgot that months prior he had requested and gotten approved vacation time. He actually came back from Hawaii while we were in his house. No joke. He was annoyed at us and his coworkers but it was still a happier ending than the several times we went in and the dude was dead from doing the c & s. People be surprised what a common form of accidental death that is. ---
**Author:** ![Dewey\_Finn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dewey_finn/32/4222_2.png) [@Dewey\_Finn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dewey_Finn)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2018, 9:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-an-unmarried-person-dies-in-their-house-how-is-their-death-discovered/825410/48 "2018-12-02T21:07:20Z")
What the heck is “the c & s”? ---
**Author:** ![Loach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/loach/32/350_2.png) [@Loach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loach)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2018, 9:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-an-unmarried-person-dies-in-their-house-how-is-their-death-discovered/825410/49 "2018-12-02T21:34:36Z")
> [@Dewey\_Finn](#): > > What the heck is “the c & s”? I’m assuming autoerotic asphyxiation. ---
**Author:** ![pkbites](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pkbites/32/204_2.png) [@pkbites](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pkbites)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2018, 10:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-an-unmarried-person-dies-in-their-house-how-is-their-death-discovered/825410/50 "2018-12-02T22:05:27Z")
> [@Loach](#): > > I’m assuming autoerotic asphyxiation. Yep. Choke and Stroke. Whenever one sees an obit for a realitevly young guy who “passed away unexpectedly” it could be a heart attack or suicide. But sometimes the guy was found with a clothes line stretched across his bed posts and his junk in his hand. One guy had made a weird contraption with weights that was supposed to prevent his full weight from hanging himself. It failed. The lack of oxygen is supposed to heighten pleasure. Guess these guys never heard of poppers. And it’s always a guy. In 36+ years I’ve never been to one involving a woman. ---
**Author:** ![Kiwi\_Fruit](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kiwi_fruit/32/12_2.png) [@Kiwi\_Fruit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kiwi_Fruit)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2018, 11:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-an-unmarried-person-dies-in-their-house-how-is-their-death-discovered/825410/51 "2018-12-02T23:01:16Z")
My cousin’s husband was concerned about my aunt, who lived on her own. He made an autodialler triggered by the toilet cistern. If the toilet wasn’t used for over 12 hours, it would dial a programmed number and play a recorded message. I think he initially had it call their number so he could check on her if it was triggered. The call button on a lanyard is reasonable common around here. I believe there are several organisations who operate a service for people who may need it. As others have said, you need to still be aware to be able to use it, so mostly for falls or other reasons that you can’t get up. ---
**Author:** ![Spiderman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spiderman/32/230_2.png) [@Spiderman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spiderman)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2018, 1:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-an-unmarried-person-dies-in-their-house-how-is-their-death-discovered/825410/52 "2018-12-03T01:13:05Z")
> [@edwardcoast](#): > > The postal carrier or someone from the utility company would likely see there is no activity there, mail isn’t being picked up, and there is no reply for unpaid utility bills. Unpaid utility bills usually cause the service to be cut-off and they would unlikely do that without contacting the owner. Especially during winter, I don’t think they would cut off utilities to deny someone heat because of an unpaid bill. There’s a period of time in both the Spring & Fall where my HVAC is off as I need neither heat nor A/C. If one were to die either overnight or during the day (when no lights were on) I’d assume it would take some time for the utility bills to run up enough of a balance for anyone to notice. No one in the house would be using water or gas & there’s only minimal electrical usage from things like the stove/microwave clocks, the computer, etc. With more & more people doing electronic bills it would even take some time for the mailbox to overflow. We have one of those [community mailboxes](http://www.asaplocksmithaustin.com/images/2407/mailbox_community_cropped-51380.360.242.jpg) & it’s around the corner, I only get the (junk) mail about once a week; it would take the mailman a few weeks to notice something. ---
**Author:** ![Spiderman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spiderman/32/230_2.png) [@Spiderman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spiderman)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2018, 1:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-an-unmarried-person-dies-in-their-house-how-is-their-death-discovered/825410/53 "2018-12-03T01:25:22Z")
Just after I posted the above, I got an email from my Ye Olde House of Worship about a member who had died. The standard - funeral arrangements, next of kin, etc. While I don’t know who it was by name, it sounds like he was never married. Siblings living in other states & was old enough to have numerous grand nieces & nephews. Given the subject of this thread, one has to wonder how long until someone knew he was deceased. ---
**Author:** ![PatrickLondon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/patricklondon/32/4422_2.png) [@PatrickLondon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PatrickLondon)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2018, 6:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-an-unmarried-person-dies-in-their-house-how-is-their-death-discovered/825410/54 "2018-12-03T06:38:58Z")
As it happens, the French mail service is now offering a regular check on isolated elderly people (for a subscription): > **[Care package: the French postal workers helping lonely older people](https://www.google.co.uk/amp/s/amp.theguardian.com/world/2018/nov/23/care-package-french-postal-workers-helping-lonely-older-people)** > > New service allows customers to pay for postal workers to check on their elderly relatives Though one does wonder whether the concerned relatives mightn’t just pick up the phone once in a while. ---
**Author:** ![Broomstick](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/broomstick/32/246_2.png) [@Broomstick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Broomstick)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2018, 8:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-an-unmarried-person-dies-in-their-house-how-is-their-death-discovered/825410/55 "2018-12-03T08:42:43Z")
Not everyone has relatives. Not everyone’s relatives give a damn. ---
**Author:** ![Dewey\_Finn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dewey_finn/32/4222_2.png) [@Dewey\_Finn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dewey_Finn)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2018, 1:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-an-unmarried-person-dies-in-their-house-how-is-their-death-discovered/825410/56 "2018-12-03T13:21:03Z")
Also, the in-person postal employee might see things (particularly if they actually interact with the elderly) that a distant relative may not pick up on. ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2018, 1:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-an-unmarried-person-dies-in-their-house-how-is-their-death-discovered/825410/57 "2018-12-03T13:40:04Z")
The bar I frequent would notice a drastic fall in sales. ---
**Author:** ![Emergency911](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/43a26b/32.png) [@Emergency911](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Emergency911)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2018, 2:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-an-unmarried-person-dies-in-their-house-how-is-their-death-discovered/825410/58 "2018-12-03T14:25:36Z")
> [@Enola\_Gay](#): > > Years ago I had an elderly neighbor who was discovered dead inside his home after a neighbor called police to do a wellness check. The neighbor was suspicious because she hadn’t seen him in a while & the windows of his home were all covered with flies (on the inside). He had apparently been dead for a couple of weeks before his body was discovered. I’ve had calls like this as well. One thing I have noticed is that neighbors don’t always talk and get to know each other like they did years ago. Even though they don’t talk, people still seem to notice their neighbors habits and will call when those habits aren’t happening. A couple of years ago we had a person call because their neighbor hadn’t put out their trash for several weeks. The callers concern was that the smell of un-picked up trash would attract vermin. Fortunately, the person in question had called the dispatch center and told us they were visiting family for a month, (PD provides an out of town watch service) so nothing was wrong. The thing that got me was that the caller noticed no trash can at the street for three weeks, but didn’t notice a police car stopping by and walking around their neighbors house three times a day. We also get a lot of calls from the Post Office when they notice mail piling up, some of them have been dead, but we have had several where they have fallen and we were able to save them. We have given awards to the mail carriers for their efforts. In this area, word seems to spread and all of the mail carriers do a great job of paying attention. ---
**Author:** ![cochrane](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cochrane/32/10441_2.png) [@cochrane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cochrane)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2018, 2:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-an-unmarried-person-dies-in-their-house-how-is-their-death-discovered/825410/59 "2018-12-03T14:31:36Z")
I go to dialysis three times a week. If I were to miss a session, the staff would become _extremely_ concerned and undoubtedly would call the Sheriff’s Office to do a welfare check. I wouldn’t wish dialysis on anybody, but they do take it seriously if you don’t show up. ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2018, 2:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-an-unmarried-person-dies-in-their-house-how-is-their-death-discovered/825410/60 "2018-12-03T14:51:26Z")
When I worked in real estate, we got a call from the daughter of the owner of a house we had listed. She hadn’t heard from her father in a week, and could we check on him. The agent and I took the key, opened the front door, and got an unbelievable stench. He closed the door, and asked me what to do. I called the police, and they came over and went into the house. It turned out the owner had been dead for about a week, during a July heat wave. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-an-unmarried-person-dies-in-their-house-how-is-their-death-discovered/825410.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-an-unmarried-person-dies-in-their-house-how-is-their-death-discovered/825410.md?page=4)