Good point. So to the core question - why do conservatives think someone would willingly choose to be gay in a society where the benefits are outweighed by disadvantages. It is my opinion that for some people, deciding to have gay sex is not rational. This is not exclusive to gay sex. It is well known in many contexts that sex drives men and women to act against their own interests. Acting on lustful impulses have ruined many a marriage and I’m sure bisexual and gay people are not immune. For many people though, I believe the benefits outweigh the disadvantages, because people decide for themselves what is or isn’t important. It’s not for me to say how important your (generic “you”) sex life is to you, or what weight you give to publicly or even privately expressing your own identity. I may have opinions, of course, and my opinions may or may not affect yours, but it is ultimately not up to me to decide how important something is to you.
~Max