# If gradeschool kids teased you about your username, they'd call you... **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [July 20, 2000, 6:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-gradeschool-kids-teased-you-about-your-username-theyd-call-you/26215 "2000-07-20T06:02:12Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Gazoo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/ce73a5/32.png) [@Gazoo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gazoo)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2000, 9:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-gradeschool-kids-teased-you-about-your-username-theyd-call-you/26215/41 "2000-07-20T21:32:07Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by techchick68 \* > \*\*I was thinking more along the lines of: > > **Icky Icky techchicky** That’s truly elementary school flavor 😉 \*\* Yeah, for grade school I guess **69** probably wouldn’t mean much! ---
**Author:** ![ponch](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/bcef8e/32.png) [@ponch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ponch)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2000, 9:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-gradeschool-kids-teased-you-about-your-username-theyd-call-you/26215/42 "2000-07-20T21:40:21Z")
still can’t get past poo-poo head and loser. hwy ponch, where’s jon? ---
**Author:** ![Larry\_Borgia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/larry_borgia/32/156_2.png) [@Larry\_Borgia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Borgia)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2000, 9:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-gradeschool-kids-teased-you-about-your-username-theyd-call-you/26215/43 "2000-07-20T21:44:38Z")
Whatever they’d call me they’d only call me it once, before wasting away with a mysterious fatal illness. ---
**Author:** ![wacky\_ninja](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/58956e/32.png) [@wacky\_ninja](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wacky_ninja)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2000, 9:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-gradeschool-kids-teased-you-about-your-username-theyd-call-you/26215/44 "2000-07-20T21:53:14Z")
what the hell can you do with Wacky Ninja? although i did used to be called berkob\*tch \ it stuck all the way to now, hence my website, berkobtch’s playground. ---
**Author:** ![nashiitashii](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/7c8e57/32.png) [@nashiitashii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nashiitashii)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2000, 9:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-gradeschool-kids-teased-you-about-your-username-theyd-call-you/26215/45 "2000-07-20T21:57:35Z")
well, first one that comes to mind is squeeegeeee. [thanks paddy.] ---
**Author:** ![Catrandom](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/7bcc69/32.png) [@Catrandom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Catrandom)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2000, 10:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-gradeschool-kids-teased-you-about-your-username-theyd-call-you/26215/46 "2000-07-20T22:16:25Z")
Too obvious… Fatrandom (sigh) ---
**Author:** ![Padeye](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/a9a28c/32.png) [@Padeye](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Padeye)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2000, 10:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-gradeschool-kids-teased-you-about-your-username-theyd-call-you/26215/47 "2000-07-20T22:30:47Z")
Pataco. The really crude kids, Padildo. ---
**Author:** ![ChrisP\_One\_Kenobe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e19b73/32.png) [@ChrisP\_One\_Kenobe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ChrisP_One_Kenobe)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2000, 10:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-gradeschool-kids-teased-you-about-your-username-theyd-call-you/26215/48 "2000-07-20T22:35:00Z")
Or, browneye! Sorry, I just thought you really missed your chance, and I would help you out. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![tubagirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b77776/32.png) [@tubagirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tubagirl)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2000, 12:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-gradeschool-kids-teased-you-about-your-username-theyd-call-you/26215/49 "2000-07-21T00:35:52Z")
Well I was going to have a licence plate made up with “tubagirl” on it. But then my sister pointed out most people will see it as tubbagirl. She loves calling me fat. Beotch! ---
**Author:** ![oldscratch](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ed655f/32.png) [@oldscratch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/oldscratch)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2000, 12:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-gradeschool-kids-teased-you-about-your-username-theyd-call-you/26215/50 "2000-07-21T00:41:13Z")
Scratchy Scratchy. I guess. Or maybe oldscroat. I don’t know. Who can know what evil lurks in the minds of kids. ---
**Author:** ![dougie\_monty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/439d5e/32.png) [@dougie\_monty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dougie_monty)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2000, 12:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-gradeschool-kids-teased-you-about-your-username-theyd-call-you/26215/51 "2000-07-21T00:42:00Z")
If I had a nickel for every time I was called “McGumballmachine…” (last name, Montgomery). Perhaps they would have jeered me with “Dougie’s Mommy.” ---
**Author:** ![silent\_rob](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e9a140/32.png) [@silent\_rob](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silent_rob)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2000, 8:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-gradeschool-kids-teased-you-about-your-username-theyd-call-you/26215/52 "2000-07-21T08:15:39Z")
Top ten names used by grade school kids to tease silent\_rob: 1. siren\_rob 2. tyrant\_snob 3. silent\_slob 4. silent\_blob 5. silen\_trob 6. loud\_rob 7. not\_so\_silent\_rob 8. pirate\_rob 9. silent\_corn\_on\_the\_cob And the # 1 name used by grade school kids to tease silent\_rob: 1. George W. Bush ---
**Author:** ![FreakFreely](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/48db29/32.png) [@FreakFreely](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FreakFreely)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2000, 7:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-gradeschool-kids-teased-you-about-your-username-theyd-call-you/26215/53 "2000-07-21T19:53:15Z")
FelchFreely ---
**Author:** ![ChrisP\_One\_Kenobe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e19b73/32.png) [@ChrisP\_One\_Kenobe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ChrisP_One_Kenobe)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2000, 7:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-gradeschool-kids-teased-you-about-your-username-theyd-call-you/26215/54 "2000-07-21T19:58:58Z")
I have held off long enough. I figured that I could have guessed what felching is, but I just can’t. So dammit what is it? Someone once reversed the letters in my name and called me Pis Chrayne (piss crane). I always got a kick out of that one. ---
**Author:** ![SqrlCub](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ea5d25/32.png) [@SqrlCub](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SqrlCub)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2000, 8:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-gradeschool-kids-teased-you-about-your-username-theyd-call-you/26215/55 "2000-07-21T20:08:59Z")
sGIRLcub Squickup (must be a cleaner of some sort) Hiccup (from Squickup) HUGS! Sqrl PS. You don’t want to know what feltching is, Chris. ---
**Author:** ![Trout\_Mask\_Replica](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a88e57/32.png) [@Trout\_Mask\_Replica](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trout_Mask_Replica)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2000, 8:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-gradeschool-kids-teased-you-about-your-username-theyd-call-you/26215/56 "2000-07-21T20:10:54Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by ChrisP One Kenobe \* > **I have held off long enough. I figured that I could have guessed what felching is, but I just can’t. So dammit what is it?** I ain’t gonna be the one who tells him. – Trout Ass Buttlicker. ---
**Author:** ![Maeglin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/8baadc/32.png) [@Maeglin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Maeglin)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2000, 9:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-gradeschool-kids-teased-you-about-your-username-theyd-call-you/26215/57 "2000-07-21T21:05:21Z")
These URLS explain much more eloquently than I ever could. [http://www.gayfelching.com](http://www.gayfelching.com) [http://www.dropsquad.com/messages/msgs16689.html](http://www.dropsquad.com/messages/msgs16689.html) [http://www.web-ster.com/jcarroll/felch.htm](http://www.web-ster.com/jcarroll/felch.htm) [http://www.humour-online.com/PlainJokes/AFelchingSession.htm](http://www.humour-online.com/PlainJokes/AFelchingSession.htm) [http://www.halcyon.com/elf/altsex/vocab.html](http://www.halcyon.com/elf/altsex/vocab.html) [http://www.adulteroticstories.com/felching.stories.backdoor.guys.5.html](http://www.adulteroticstories.com/felching.stories.backdoor.guys.5.html) [http://www.illuminated.co.uk/flat/explanation.html](http://www.illuminated.co.uk/flat/explanation.html) [This one even talks about squicking] These sites should provide a more than sufficient explanation. Regards, MR ---
**Author:** ![Balance](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ccd318/32.png) [@Balance](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Balance)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2000, 9:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-gradeschool-kids-teased-you-about-your-username-theyd-call-you/26215/58 "2000-07-21T21:05:45Z")
Chris, just pretend that “felching” is a generic term for “really disgusting deviant sexual activity”. You _will_ be happier not knowing the details. ---
**Author:** ![nashiitashii](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/7c8e57/32.png) [@nashiitashii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nashiitashii)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2000, 9:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-gradeschool-kids-teased-you-about-your-username-theyd-call-you/26215/59 "2000-07-21T21:45:52Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by ChrisP One Kenobe \* > **I have held off long enough. I figured that I could have guessed what felching is, but I just can’t. So dammit what is it?** You really want to know? Okay then, I’ll tell you. Felching is sucking freshly ejaculated semen out of someone’s anus, sometimes done with a straw. Would you like to know what squicking is also? ::grins knowingly:: ---
**Author:** ![SterlingNorth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/8dc957/32.png) [@SterlingNorth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SterlingNorth)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2000, 10:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-gradeschool-kids-teased-you-about-your-username-theyd-call-you/26215/60 "2000-07-21T22:22:49Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Maeglin \* > These URLS explain much more eloquently than I ever could. > > [followed by **seven** websites] > These sites should provide a more than sufficient explanation. > > Regards, > MR WOW! I don’t know what shocks me more, that there are _at least_ that many ‘feltching’ websites out there, or that **Maeglin** had ad some time gone and found them all. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-gradeschool-kids-teased-you-about-your-username-theyd-call-you/26215.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-gradeschool-kids-teased-you-about-your-username-theyd-call-you/26215.md?page=4)