# If I had have a bumper sticker... **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [November 23, 2001, 7:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-i-had-have-a-bumper-sticker/94937 "2001-11-23T19:29:02Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Zenster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/cdc98d/32.png) [@Zenster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zenster)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 2001, 1:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-i-had-have-a-bumper-sticker/94937/21 "2001-11-25T01:33:08Z")
> [@](#): > > _Originally posted by zenzelli78 \* > The **Dog is my Copilot** sticker of which Zenster writes was probably purchased from [http://www.bark.com](http://www.bark.com)_\* Let me know when you get to Oakland. We’ll have to organize a Dopefest. > [@](#): > > _Originally posted by Getimboys \* > (On a Red Sticker) “If this sticker appears blue, you’re driving too fast.”_\* Schweit! ---
**Author:** ![screech-owl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/82dd89/32.png) [@screech-owl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/screech-owl)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 2001, 12:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-i-had-have-a-bumper-sticker/94937/22 "2001-11-25T12:41:52Z")
“Honk if you hate noise pollution.” ---
**Author:** ![Mogwei22](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d78d45/32.png) [@Mogwei22](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mogwei22)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 2001, 5:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-i-had-have-a-bumper-sticker/94937/23 "2001-11-25T17:47:23Z")
I have only seen this one once and I’m in a constant search for it: Quityourrbitchin Just love the way it sounds. ---
**Author:** ![andygirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a9adbd/32.png) [@andygirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/andygirl)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 2001, 5:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-i-had-have-a-bumper-sticker/94937/24 "2001-11-25T17:51:39Z")
I love “I’m bisexual and I’m not attracted to you.” ---
**Author:** ![cornflakes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9d8465/32.png) [@cornflakes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cornflakes)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 2001, 6:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-i-had-have-a-bumper-sticker/94937/25 "2001-11-25T18:12:55Z")
**CAR BOMB** , courtesy of Negativeland. ---
**Author:** ![WEW](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/8edcca/32.png) [@WEW](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WEW)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 2001, 6:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-i-had-have-a-bumper-sticker/94937/26 "2001-11-25T18:33:41Z")
“Ban bumper stickers” ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e47c2d/32.png) [@Diogenes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2001, 12:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-i-had-have-a-bumper-sticker/94937/27 "2001-11-26T00:46:02Z")
“Scientists say 1 out of every 4 people is crazy, check 3 friends, if they are ok, your it” ---
**Author:** ![Fanny\_May](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/3be4f8/32.png) [@Fanny\_May](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fanny_May)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2001, 12:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-i-had-have-a-bumper-sticker/94937/28 "2001-11-26T00:52:33Z")
My bumper sticker says **The Best Cats In Life Are Free [sup]Visit your local animal shelter[/sup]** ---
**Author:** ![Lectricity](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/9d8465/32.png) [@Lectricity](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lectricity)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2001, 1:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-i-had-have-a-bumper-sticker/94937/29 "2001-11-26T01:29:22Z")
Three two one zero… I’d love to get my hands on the CAR BOMB sticker! Yep, thats the one for me, thanks Cornflakes. (There is no other possibility) ---
**Author:** ![Ell](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/e47774/32.png) [@Ell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ell)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2001, 2:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-i-had-have-a-bumper-sticker/94937/30 "2001-11-26T02:01:19Z")
I have a bumper sticker that says something like: xxx Pornstar xxx I make home movies I haven’t had the guts yet to put it on to my car. My grandparents see that car! ---
**Author:** ![Flymaster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/c4cdca/32.png) [@Flymaster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Flymaster)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2001, 5:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-i-had-have-a-bumper-sticker/94937/31 "2001-11-26T05:56:04Z")
Nice People Swallow (which, of course, is a different spin on the “Mean People Suck” sticker) ---
**Author:** ![Ferrous](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/8e7dd6/32.png) [@Ferrous](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ferrous)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2001, 8:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-i-had-have-a-bumper-sticker/94937/32 "2001-11-26T20:04:02Z")
“I’m trying to see things from your point of view, but I can’t get my head that far up my ass.” Hey, **Lectricity** : We’re 10-8! ---
**Author:** ![mighty\_maxx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/2acd7d/32.png) [@mighty\_maxx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mighty_maxx)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2001, 8:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-i-had-have-a-bumper-sticker/94937/33 "2001-11-26T20:16:58Z")
I have a bumper sticker that says “Keep honking, I’m reloading”…I’ve been looking for one that says “Nuke the whales” I seen it a long time ago, and have wanted it ever since. ---
**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2001, 10:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-i-had-have-a-bumper-sticker/94937/34 "2001-11-26T22:02:44Z")
my wife has two from northern sun: “God was my co-pilot, but we crashed in the mountains and I had to eat him” and “ISIS ISIS, RA RA RA!”, which nobody seems to understand around these parts. my jeep has a local meat packers sticker that says “you can lick out chops, but you cant beat our meat!” and one upside down that says “if you can read this, roll me over!” i haven’t found a good spot for the “Jesus was in a coma” sticker yet… ---
**Author:** ![Lectricity](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/9d8465/32.png) [@Lectricity](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lectricity)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2001, 12:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-i-had-have-a-bumper-sticker/94937/35 "2001-11-27T00:08:35Z")
I forgot this one- “DYSLEXICS OF THE WORLD - UNTIE!” ---
**Author:** ![ModernRonin2](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c37758/32.png) [@ModernRonin2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ModernRonin2)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2001, 12:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-i-had-have-a-bumper-sticker/94937/36 "2001-11-27T00:27:20Z")
Gotta love [Unamerican.com](http://Unamerican.com). I’m seriously considering getting the plates on my penis-compensation sports car changed to “Twenty-nothing” and putting an “I’m destroying the environment!” sticker on the thing, thanks to them. My friend has great “Wage-slave” and “Your ad here” t-shirts from them that I seriously need to get. **Mighty\_Maxx** , that almost sounds like a [Nurwhibsco.com](http://Nurwhibsco.com) bumper-sticker. Pity they went out of business - they had some hilarious ones. I think my favorites were “Shave the whales” and “Give piece a chance”. That last had a picture of a pistol on it. The offensiveness factor of their stuff was just amazing, and I for one found it hilariously funny because of that. I used to have a “He died in AD 33 - Get over it!” sticker on my car. (Want one? [http://www.pegasuspublishing.com](http://www.pegasuspublishing.com)) Unfortunately it was too subtle. I kept getting people looking at me puzzled, asking, “Who died in AD 33?” At that point I pretty much figured that my mission had been accomplished, so I took it off. ;] Not sure what I’ll do next. Maybe some Unamerican stickers. The Pegasus Publishing site mentioned above has some kinda fun ones: “Vote: REPUBLICAN, it’s easier than THINKING; DEMOCRAT, it’s easier than WORKING; LIBERTARIAN, it’s cheaper than paying TAXES”. Heh. Maybe one of those “Linux” fish/sharks. Or a “Keep music evil” or “Kinky sex makes the world go 'round” sticker from Unamerican. Or maybe I’ll just get that one I saw once: “I HAVE NO OPINIONS ON ANYTHING WHATSOEVER - LEAVE ME THE HELL ALONE.” Hehehhe. Or maybe all of the above, plus the obligatory “My other car has NO bumper stickers!” sticker. ;] -Ben ---
**Author:** ![Eonwe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eonwe/32/240_2.png) [@Eonwe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eonwe)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2001, 2:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-i-had-have-a-bumper-sticker/94937/37 "2001-11-27T14:11:45Z")
If I had a bumper sticker, I’d bumper sticker in the morning… ---
**Author:** ![swampbear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampbear/32/467_2.png) [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2001, 2:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-i-had-have-a-bumper-sticker/94937/38 "2001-11-27T14:33:48Z")
One of my neighbors is a mail carrier. His bumper sticker: **BACK OFF! I’M A POSTAL WORKER** ---
**Author:** ![TelcontarStorm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/3ab097/32.png) [@TelcontarStorm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TelcontarStorm)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2001, 4:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-i-had-have-a-bumper-sticker/94937/39 "2001-11-27T16:41:47Z")
My Godess can beat up your God My other car is a broom I don’t care who you are,what you are driving or where You’d rather be! Knights are good. Especialy with ketchup (A Dragon Thing) ---
**Author:** ![yanceylebeef](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yanceylebeef/32/12290_2.png) [@yanceylebeef](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/yanceylebeef)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2001, 5:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-i-had-have-a-bumper-sticker/94937/40 "2001-11-27T17:00:44Z")
It’d have to be the one I saw last year: 667 The Neighbor of the Beast especially funny in Christian Right Colorado springs. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-i-had-have-a-bumper-sticker/94937.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-i-had-have-a-bumper-sticker/94937.md?page=3)