# If I were a dictator, where would be the safest country to stow my ill-gotten loot? **URL:** \ **Category:** Great Debates\ **Created:** [March 9, 2011, 3:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-i-were-a-dictator-where-would-be-the-safest-country-to-stow-my-ill-gotten-loot/574059 "2011-03-09T15:48:38Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 14\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![joebuck20](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/74df32/32.png) [@joebuck20](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/joebuck20)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2011, 3:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-i-were-a-dictator-where-would-be-the-safest-country-to-stow-my-ill-gotten-loot/574059/1 "2011-03-09T15:48:38Z")
In the wake of the revolutions in the Arab world, a lot of western countries have taken steps to freeze the bank accounts of Mubarak and Gadhafi. Even Switzerland, which has traditionally been seen as a safe haven, has in recent years taken a hard line toward corrupt leaders banking there. So if I had a few billion dollars that I looted from my country’s treasury and wanted to put it away for a rainy day, where I could do so without worrying about the local government asking too many questions or wanting too big a cut, especially when the shit hits the fan? Keep in mind, also that it would have to be a place with a fairly secure and stable banking system, otherwise it would kind of defeat the purpose. How about the Caribbean or South America? Any places in the Far East, perhaps? ---
**Author:** ![Tom\_Scud](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/f08c70/32.png) [@Tom\_Scud](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tom_Scud)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2011, 3:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-i-were-a-dictator-where-would-be-the-safest-country-to-stow-my-ill-gotten-loot/574059/2 "2011-03-09T15:55:25Z")
Dubai seems like a decent bet. Possibly Russia, assuming you’re willing to be a pro-Putin zombie in any public statements you make, which really isn’t much of a sacrifice. ---
**Author:** ![gonzomax](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/e8c25b/32.png) [@gonzomax](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gonzomax)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2011, 3:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-i-were-a-dictator-where-would-be-the-safest-country-to-stow-my-ill-gotten-loot/574059/3 "2011-03-09T15:59:30Z")
The Cayman Island banks will hide your money. They allow dummy corporations to avoid taxes too. The weather is good too. ---
**Author:** ![Tom\_Tildrum](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e95f7d/32.png) [@Tom\_Tildrum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tom_Tildrum)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2011, 4:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-i-were-a-dictator-where-would-be-the-safest-country-to-stow-my-ill-gotten-loot/574059/4 "2011-03-09T16:56:50Z")
Mauritius? ---
**Author:** ![tagos](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/bbe5ce/32.png) [@tagos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tagos)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2011, 4:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-i-were-a-dictator-where-would-be-the-safest-country-to-stow-my-ill-gotten-loot/574059/5 "2011-03-09T16:59:34Z")
> [@Tom\_Tildrum](#): > > Mauritius? Whatever one Commissar ends up running? ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2011, 5:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-i-were-a-dictator-where-would-be-the-safest-country-to-stow-my-ill-gotten-loot/574059/6 "2011-03-09T17:10:05Z")
You might be better off investing it back in your own country, mollifying the people with bread and circuses and whatnot, thus eliminating the need for a sudden departure. ---
**Author:** ![Dick\_Dastardly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/c4cdca/32.png) [@Dick\_Dastardly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dick_Dastardly)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2011, 6:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-i-were-a-dictator-where-would-be-the-safest-country-to-stow-my-ill-gotten-loot/574059/7 "2011-03-09T18:06:54Z")
The offshore banking system in Britain. Jersey etc. Once the money goes through there and is directed round the world a few times it’s impossible to trace. ---
**Author:** ![TravisFromOR](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/cc9497/32.png) [@TravisFromOR](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TravisFromOR)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2011, 7:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-i-were-a-dictator-where-would-be-the-safest-country-to-stow-my-ill-gotten-loot/574059/8 "2011-03-09T19:51:28Z")
You should divide it up into chunks, and send off e-mails to Americans, letting them keep the interest if they allow you to make deposits into their bank accounts. ---
**Author:** ![Kobal2](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kobal2/32/20_2.png) [@Kobal2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kobal2)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2011, 8:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-i-were-a-dictator-where-would-be-the-safest-country-to-stow-my-ill-gotten-loot/574059/9 "2011-03-09T20:31:28Z")
> [@TravisFromOR](#): > > You should divide it up into chunks, and send off e-mails to Americans, letting them keep the interest if they allow you to make deposits into their bank accounts. How would you ever get the money back ? ---
**Author:** ![Frodo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/frodo/32/302_2.png) [@Frodo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frodo)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2011, 9:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-i-were-a-dictator-where-would-be-the-safest-country-to-stow-my-ill-gotten-loot/574059/10 "2011-03-09T21:04:30Z")
Need answer fast? ---
**Author:** ![Markxxx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/5daacb/32.png) [@Markxxx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Markxxx)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2011, 9:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-i-were-a-dictator-where-would-be-the-safest-country-to-stow-my-ill-gotten-loot/574059/11 "2011-03-09T21:38:31Z")
The best way is to divide it up. That way the “good guys” will go after the evil dictator’s money and get it. Well some of it. They think they get most of it, and after awhile everyone forgets about him and he can then keep what’s stashed. Also putting it in the names of people you think will be loyal. Idi Amin was one of the most notorious dictators and it didn’t take long for most of the world to forget about him. You could also do a transfer. Let’s say Mr Evil Dictator has a few billion, he keeps enough of it to live a basic life and transfers the rest to the dictator of another country that will let him stay. That dictator agrees to “put him up in comfort” for life. Of course, that too, depends on trust. ---
**Author:** ![joebuck20](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/74df32/32.png) [@joebuck20](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/joebuck20)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2011, 9:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-i-were-a-dictator-where-would-be-the-safest-country-to-stow-my-ill-gotten-loot/574059/12 "2011-03-09T21:46:28Z")
> [@Frodo](#): > > Need answer fast? Depends, but I’ll keep you abreast on things in the Buck household. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![sisu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/df705f/32.png) [@sisu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sisu)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2011, 11:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-i-were-a-dictator-where-would-be-the-safest-country-to-stow-my-ill-gotten-loot/574059/13 "2011-03-09T23:41:34Z")
Well I know a guy in Nigeria that has promised to help me out, maybe he can help you? ---
**Author:** ![Stranger\_On\_A\_Train](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/13edae/32.png) [@Stranger\_On\_A\_Train](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stranger_On_A_Train)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2011, 11:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-i-were-a-dictator-where-would-be-the-safest-country-to-stow-my-ill-gotten-loot/574059/14 "2011-03-09T23:44:29Z")
You should probably not invest it with the one-eyed self-proclaimed mathematical genius with a gambling problem and a tenuous connection to a secretive globe-spanning organization dedicated to financing terrorism and toppling governments for its own ends. At least, not if Vauxhall Cross is taking an interest. Stranger