# If I Were To Drink A Glass Of Mercury, Would It Squirt Out Of My Anus? **URL:** \ **Category:** Factual Questions\ **Created:** [May 26, 2005, 2:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-i-were-to-drink-a-glass-of-mercury-would-it-squirt-out-of-my-anus/305608 "2005-05-26T14:54:22Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 12\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\ **Post date:** [June 1, 2005, 7:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-i-were-to-drink-a-glass-of-mercury-would-it-squirt-out-of-my-anus/305608/41 "2005-06-01T19:11:22Z")
Well, it just depends where you put the light source. ---
**Author:** ![istara](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/e79b87/32.png) [@istara](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/istara)\ **Post date:** [June 1, 2005, 7:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-i-were-to-drink-a-glass-of-mercury-would-it-squirt-out-of-my-anus/305608/42 "2005-06-01T19:19:57Z")
> [@Chronos](#): > > …your anus has no great difficulty holding water in. Not “brown water”, it doesn’t. =\>anal Niagara Falls ---
**Author:** ![Saltire](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/saltire/32/553_2.png) [@Saltire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Saltire)\ **Post date:** [June 1, 2005, 7:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-i-were-to-drink-a-glass-of-mercury-would-it-squirt-out-of-my-anus/305608/43 "2005-06-01T19:52:22Z")
> [@Chronos](#): > > Well, it just depends where you put the light source. But wait, ain’t that where the sun don’t shine? ---
**Author:** ![Pez](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/5e9695/32.png) [@Pez](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pez)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2005, 1:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-i-were-to-drink-a-glass-of-mercury-would-it-squirt-out-of-my-anus/305608/44 "2005-06-02T01:01:24Z")
> [@Askia](#): > > Yeah, you don’t wanna let Klingons probe Uranus. It’s improctocal and Mogh trouble than ncessary. Have you got cling-ons from around the ring of Uranus? Mad as hatter, I’d say. ---
**Author:** ![tracer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tracer/32/20578_2.png) [@tracer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tracer)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2005, 1:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-i-were-to-drink-a-glass-of-mercury-would-it-squirt-out-of-my-anus/305608/45 "2005-06-03T01:58:01Z")
> [@spingears](#): > > IIRC mercury wil lodge in the bottom of the stomach and low places in the intestines IF it get that far. It is likely to perferote the stomach also. The legend I heard at summer camp while growing up was that, if you drank mercury, its weight (13.6 times the density of water) would be so great that it would slam its way down your esophagus, smash through the bottom of your stomach, and pool inside your poor ruptured abdomen. Then again, these were the same kids who believed that Mikey the Life Cereal Kid dies from eating Pop Rocks. ---
**Author:** ![tracer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tracer/32/20578_2.png) [@tracer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tracer)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2005, 2:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-i-were-to-drink-a-glass-of-mercury-would-it-squirt-out-of-my-anus/305608/46 "2005-06-03T02:00:16Z")
> [@The Sausage Creature](#): > > I believe mercuric ore (cinnabar) was used as a treatment for syphilis back in the days of yore. Indeed. According to one film I had to see in High School about S.T.D.s, the old saying about syphilis was “A night with Venus, a lifetime with Mercury.” (Those wacky Renaissance punsters!) ---
**Author:** ![tracer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tracer/32/20578_2.png) [@tracer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tracer)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2005, 2:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-i-were-to-drink-a-glass-of-mercury-would-it-squirt-out-of-my-anus/305608/47 "2005-06-03T02:03:11Z")
Oh, and before I forget: What do you call a bunch of holes in the ground that contain mercury? Hg wells Thank you, thank you! I’ll bee here all week! Tip your waitstaff! ---
**Author:** ![Omniscient](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/omniscient/32/3290_2.png) [@Omniscient](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Omniscient)\ **Post date:** [December 6, 2005, 8:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-i-were-to-drink-a-glass-of-mercury-would-it-squirt-out-of-my-anus/305608/48 "2005-12-06T20:10:25Z")
> [@Chronos](#): > > Consider that it’s also pretty hard to keep water from slipping through your hands, but your anus has no great difficulty holding water in. A good sphincter muscle produces a much better seal than do fingers. Spoken like a man who knows his anuses. ---
**Author:** ![ouryL](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ouryl/32/6067_2.png) [@ouryL](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ouryL)\ **Post date:** [December 7, 2005, 11:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-i-were-to-drink-a-glass-of-mercury-would-it-squirt-out-of-my-anus/305608/49 "2005-12-07T23:33:32Z")
> [@Diogenes the Cynic](#): > > On a related note, what happens if you get drops of Jupiter in your hair? Hey! Where is the obligatory Uranus pun? :smack: ---
**Author:** ![ouryL](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ouryl/32/6067_2.png) [@ouryL](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ouryL)\ **Post date:** [December 7, 2005, 11:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-i-were-to-drink-a-glass-of-mercury-would-it-squirt-out-of-my-anus/305608/50 "2005-12-07T23:35:23Z")
> [@ouryL](#): > > Hey! Where is the obligatory Uranus pun? :smack: You know, about finding Mercury in Uranus? Maybe we can get an astrologer to explain? ---
**Author:** ![Merijeek](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f05b48/32.png) [@Merijeek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Merijeek)\ **Post date:** [December 7, 2005, 11:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-i-were-to-drink-a-glass-of-mercury-would-it-squirt-out-of-my-anus/305608/51 "2005-12-07T23:47:28Z")
> [@Diogenes the Cynic](#): > > On a related note, what happens if you get drops of Jupiter in your hair? It means you’ve (mostly) dodged a bullet and will not give birth to a demi-god. -Joe ---
**Author:** ![samclem](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a9a28c/32.png) [@samclem](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/samclem)\ **Post date:** [December 8, 2005, 1:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-i-were-to-drink-a-glass-of-mercury-would-it-squirt-out-of-my-anus/305608/52 "2005-12-08T01:12:58Z")
Closed. Old thread. I hate it when we experience mercury rising. **samclem** GQ moderator [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-i-were-to-drink-a-glass-of-mercury-would-it-squirt-out-of-my-anus/305608.md?page=2)