# If life gives you lemons... **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [June 24, 2004, 2:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931 "2004-06-24T02:27:35Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Lobsang](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lobsang/32/4067_2.png) [@Lobsang](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lobsang)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2004, 2:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/1 "2004-06-24T02:27:35Z")
Put them in your trousers and pretend you have oversized testicles. Better to be thought a fool than… ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2004, 2:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/2 "2004-06-24T02:35:03Z")
Better to be thought a fool than… to vote Democrat! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![rjk](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ed655f/32.png) [@rjk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rjk)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2004, 2:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/3 "2004-06-24T02:36:39Z")
> [@](#): > > Better to be thought a fool than… …be caught f\*\*\*ing a fowl. He who laughs last… ---
**Author:** ![IrreverentTone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/b487fb/32.png) [@IrreverentTone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/IrreverentTone)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2004, 2:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/4 "2004-06-24T02:40:50Z")
…failed to get the joke. Birds of a feather… ---
**Author:** ![unclviny](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/e274bd/32.png) [@unclviny](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/unclviny)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2004, 2:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/5 "2004-06-24T02:43:32Z")
“Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don’t” Unclviny ---
**Author:** ![unclviny](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/e274bd/32.png) [@unclviny](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/unclviny)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2004, 2:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/6 "2004-06-24T02:46:24Z")
Sorry, brainfart, I forgot what I was doing, Birds of a feather… Are mighty tasty The pen is… ---
**Author:** ![matt\_mcl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2004, 2:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/7 "2004-06-24T02:50:48Z")
> [@IrreverentTone](#): > > …failed to get the joke. > Birds of a feather… give you Good maneuverability and +1 to dexterity checks. Speak fitly or… ---
**Author:** ![Dragwyr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dragwyr/32/2855_2.png) [@Dragwyr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dragwyr)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2004, 3:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/8 "2004-06-24T03:08:10Z")
> [@unclviny](#): > > The pen is… …$0.39 each if you buy a dozen of them at K-Mart. “A penny saved…” ---
**Author:** ![verbenabeast](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/c4cdca/32.png) [@verbenabeast](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/verbenabeast)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2004, 3:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/9 "2004-06-24T03:29:47Z")
> [@](#): > > Speak fitly or… Shut the f\*ck up! > [@](#): > > “A penny saved…” ain’t worth 2 drops of pee in the Indian Ocean call me captain obvious on those… When in Rome… ---
**Author:** ![fishbicycle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/aeb1de/32.png) [@fishbicycle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fishbicycle)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2004, 3:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/10 "2004-06-24T03:30:12Z")
…still won’t buy you a piece of bubblegum. Children should be… ---
**Author:** ![Cinnamon\_Girl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9d8465/32.png) [@Cinnamon\_Girl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cinnamon_Girl)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2004, 3:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/11 "2004-06-24T03:36:06Z")
> [@](#): > > When in Rome… …do a Roman. A bird in the hand… ---
**Author:** ![msmith537](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d9b06d/32.png) [@msmith537](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/msmith537)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2004, 3:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/12 "2004-06-24T03:43:35Z")
> [@Cinnamon Girl](#): > > …do a Roman. > > A bird in the hand… Is great for using to beat my boss to death with. Ask not what you can do for your country… ---
**Author:** ![ZebraShaSha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/eada6e/32.png) [@ZebraShaSha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZebraShaSha)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2004, 3:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/13 "2004-06-24T03:49:47Z")
> [@msmith537](#): > > Is great for using to beat my boss to death with. > > Ask not what you can do for your country… …Please deposit 25 cents. You have nothing to fear except… ---
**Author:** ![Lathe\_of\_Heaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Lathe\_of\_Heaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lathe_of_Heaven)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2004, 3:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/14 "2004-06-24T03:50:01Z")
Ask not what you can do for your country… [/QUOTE] Ask _who_ you can do for your country! All roads lead… ---
**Author:** ![emekthian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ecae2f/32.png) [@emekthian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/emekthian)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2004, 4:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/15 "2004-06-24T04:04:36Z")
> [@](#): > > All roads lead… …to Rome, unless they’re on the Americas, Antarctica, or Austrailia. > [@](#): > > You have nothing to fear except… … homicidal psycho jungle cats. A stitch in time… ---
**Author:** ![Cinnamon\_Girl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9d8465/32.png) [@Cinnamon\_Girl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cinnamon_Girl)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2004, 4:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/16 "2004-06-24T04:10:14Z")
> [@emekthian](#): > > A stitch in time… …may one day save you from bleeding to death. Good things… ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2004, 4:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/17 "2004-06-24T04:19:17Z")
> [@Cinnamon Girl](#): > > Good things… …are never on sale. One swallow… ---
**Author:** ![matt\_mcl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2004, 4:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/18 "2004-06-24T04:25:18Z")
> [@silenus](#): > > …are never on sale. > > One swallow… can ruin a good bukkake video. This above all: to thine own self… ---
**Author:** ![flamingbananas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/f4b2a3/32.png) [@flamingbananas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/flamingbananas)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2004, 4:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/19 "2004-06-24T04:47:02Z")
> [@](#): > > You have nothing to fear except Hobos with knives -credits to my brother When in doubt… ---
**Author:** ![Happy\_Scrappy\_Hero\_Pup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/ea5d25/32.png) [@Happy\_Scrappy\_Hero\_Pup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Happy_Scrappy_Hero_Pup)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2004, 4:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/20 "2004-06-24T04:47:20Z")
…point the super-soaker full of tequila. If you hav enothing good to say… [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931.md?page=2)