# If life gives you lemons... **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [June 24, 2004, 2:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931 "2004-06-24T02:27:35Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 19
**Author:** ![ZombiesAteMyBrain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/b4bc9f/32.png) [@ZombiesAteMyBrain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZombiesAteMyBrain)\ **Post date:** [July 2, 2004, 12:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/361 "2004-07-02T00:52:22Z")
> [@Chastain86](#): > > If you always do what you’ve always done, you’ll always… find yourself at the wrong end of the queue. Good fences make… ---
**Author:** ![buttonjockey308](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bcef8e/32.png) [@buttonjockey308](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buttonjockey308)\ **Post date:** [July 2, 2004, 1:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/362 "2004-07-02T01:06:09Z")
> [@](#): > > Good fences make… …hating your neighbors that much easier. What light through yonder window breaks… ---
**Author:** ![ZombiesAteMyBrain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/b4bc9f/32.png) [@ZombiesAteMyBrain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZombiesAteMyBrain)\ **Post date:** [July 2, 2004, 2:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/363 "2004-07-02T02:16:51Z")
> [@buttonjockey308](#): > > … > What light through yonder window breaks… Bloody kids with fireworks!! If wishes were horses… ---
**Author:** ![Rufus\_Xavier](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/eada6e/32.png) [@Rufus\_Xavier](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rufus_Xavier)\ **Post date:** [July 2, 2004, 2:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/364 "2004-07-02T02:45:32Z")
> [@ZombiesAteMyBrain](#): > > Bloody kids with fireworks!! > > If wishes were horses… …I would wish for oats a lot more often. Absence makes the heart… ---
**Author:** ![Syntropy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/65b543/32.png) [@Syntropy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Syntropy)\ **Post date:** [July 2, 2004, 3:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/365 "2004-07-02T03:42:04Z")
> [@Rufus Xavier](#): > > Absence makes the heart… …go yonder. Laugh, and the world laughs with you… ---
**Author:** ![Chastain86](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Chastain86](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chastain86)\ **Post date:** [July 2, 2004, 2:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/366 "2004-07-02T14:44:13Z")
> [@Maureen](#): > > Laugh, and the world laughs with you… but cry, and I’ll **give** you something to cry about. Just wait until your father… ---
**Author:** ![swampbear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampbear/32/467_2.png) [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)\ **Post date:** [July 2, 2004, 2:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/367 "2004-07-02T14:50:48Z")
> [@Chastain86](#): > > but cry, and I’ll **give** you something to cry about. > Just wait until your father… comes home late, drunk after having spent his paycheck at the horse track, then you’ll see a fight. When you give someone a smile… ---
**Author:** ![Governor\_Quinn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/d26b3c/32.png) [@Governor\_Quinn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Governor_Quinn)\ **Post date:** [July 2, 2004, 3:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/368 "2004-07-02T15:53:57Z")
…you usually do not expect to be assulted with a tire iron. When in Rome… ---
**Author:** ![nocturnal\_tick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/3d9bf3/32.png) [@nocturnal\_tick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nocturnal_tick)\ **Post date:** [July 2, 2004, 4:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/369 "2004-07-02T16:22:25Z")
> [@Governor Quinn](#): > > When in Rome… …Do not ask for directions to the Eiffel Tower. In space, no-one can hear you… ---
**Author:** ![Governor\_Quinn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/d26b3c/32.png) [@Governor\_Quinn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Governor_Quinn)\ **Post date:** [July 2, 2004, 4:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/370 "2004-07-02T16:34:27Z")
…which make it the perfect place to take up the accordian. I shot an elephant in my pajamas… ---
**Author:** ![Rufus\_Xavier](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/eada6e/32.png) [@Rufus\_Xavier](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rufus_Xavier)\ **Post date:** [July 2, 2004, 5:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/371 "2004-07-02T17:46:21Z")
> [@Governor Quinn](#): > > …which make it the perfect place to take up the accordian. > > I shot an elephant in my pajamas… …but I still got the stain out with new, improved BRAGH! fabric cleanser! Clothes make the… ---
**Author:** ![BJMoose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/5fc32e/32.png) [@BJMoose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BJMoose)\ **Post date:** [July 2, 2004, 6:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/372 "2004-07-02T18:22:59Z")
. . . mannequin. A fool and his money . . . ---
**Author:** ![nocturnal\_tick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/3d9bf3/32.png) [@nocturnal\_tick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nocturnal_tick)\ **Post date:** [July 2, 2004, 6:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/373 "2004-07-02T18:25:32Z")
> [@Rufus Xavier](#): > > Clothes make the… …man able to walk down the street without getting arrested. > [@BJMoose](#): > > A fool and his money . . . …are often seen in Las Vegas. In one hand, and out… ---
**Author:** ![swampbear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampbear/32/467_2.png) [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)\ **Post date:** [July 2, 2004, 6:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/374 "2004-07-02T18:41:43Z")
> [@nocturnal\_tick](#): > > …man able to walk down the street without getting arrested. > > …are often seen in Las Vegas. > In one hand, and out… in one hand, and out, in one hand, and out, in one hand and out, ooooh yeeeeaaaaaaaaah…ummmmmmmm ummmmmmmmm ahhhhhhhhhhhhh!!! The words of a wise man… ---
**Author:** ![Governor\_Quinn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/d26b3c/32.png) [@Governor\_Quinn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Governor_Quinn)\ **Post date:** [July 2, 2004, 8:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/375 "2004-07-02T20:15:08Z")
…are frequently useless to the situation that you’re in. It don’t mean a thing if it ain’t got that… ---
**Author:** ![Chastain86](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Chastain86](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chastain86)\ **Post date:** [July 2, 2004, 8:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/376 "2004-07-02T20:26:22Z")
> [@Governor Quinn](#): > > It don’t mean a thing if it ain’t got that… …little something I like to call “Tequila happy-juice.” Is it happy hour time yet? Two roads diverged in a wood, and I took… ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [July 2, 2004, 9:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/377 "2004-07-02T21:01:32Z")
> [@Chastain86](#): > > …little something I like to call “Tequila happy-juice.” > > Is it happy hour time yet? > Two roads diverged in a wood, and I took… …my neighbor’s El Camino. Remember Pearl… ---
**Author:** ![Rufus\_Xavier](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/eada6e/32.png) [@Rufus\_Xavier](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rufus_Xavier)\ **Post date:** [July 2, 2004, 9:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/378 "2004-07-02T21:42:10Z")
> [@Bosda Di'Chi of Tricor](#): > > …my neighbor’s El Camino. > Remember Pearl… …she was the girl with the curl. Forgive me, father… ---
**Author:** ![Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ac8455/32.png) [@Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bippy_the_Beardless)\ **Post date:** [July 2, 2004, 11:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/379 "2004-07-02T23:11:55Z")
Forgive me father, for I know just what I’m doing. But it feeeeels sooooooo gooooood. It was twenty years ago today, Sgt. Pepper taught a band to … ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [July 2, 2004, 11:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/380 "2004-07-02T23:28:26Z")
> [@Bippy the Beardless](#): > > Forgive me father, for I know just what I’m doing. But it feeeeels sooooooo gooooood. > > It was twenty years ago today, Sgt. Pepper taught a band to … …invest wisely in negotiable debentures. VIVA EL SUPREMO! VIVA GENERALISSIMO BLANKA! VIVA… [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931.md?page=18) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931.md?page=20)