# If life gives you lemons... **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [June 24, 2004, 2:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931 "2004-06-24T02:27:35Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 27
**Author:** ![Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ac8455/32.png) [@Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bippy_the_Beardless)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2004, 12:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/521 "2004-07-17T00:09:34Z")
> [@ZombiesAteMyBrain](#): > > Every good boy deserves … … to get head from the Olsen twins. Thank god it’s … ---
**Author:** ![ZombiesAteMyBrain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/b4bc9f/32.png) [@ZombiesAteMyBrain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZombiesAteMyBrain)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2004, 12:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/522 "2004-07-17T00:26:25Z")
> [@Bippy the Beardless](#): > > … to get head from the Olsen twins. > > Thank god it’s … them [the Olsen twins] and not me!!! If you sow the wind, you … ---
**Author:** ![Ale](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/f19dbf/32.png) [@Ale](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ale)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2004, 1:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/523 "2004-07-17T01:12:47Z")
> [@ZombiesAteMyBrain](#): > > them [the Olsen twins] and not me!!! > > If you sow the wind, you … …you´ll be sent to the nut-house by your nighbouring farmers. The path to Hell is paved… ---
**Author:** ![buttonjockey308](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bcef8e/32.png) [@buttonjockey308](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buttonjockey308)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2004, 2:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/524 "2004-07-17T02:06:55Z")
…souls of those who use their cell phones in public places. An ounce of prevention is worth… ---
**Author:** ![buttonjockey308](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bcef8e/32.png) [@buttonjockey308](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buttonjockey308)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2004, 2:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/525 "2004-07-17T02:08:39Z")
:smack: WITH the souls of people who use their cell phones, and I meant in quite places… ---
**Author:** ![buttonjockey308](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bcef8e/32.png) [@buttonjockey308](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buttonjockey308)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2004, 2:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/526 "2004-07-17T02:10:12Z")
QUIET, places… :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![Rufus\_Xavier](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/eada6e/32.png) [@Rufus\_Xavier](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rufus_Xavier)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2004, 2:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/527 "2004-07-17T02:49:30Z")
> [@buttonjockey308](#): > > …souls of those who use their cell phones in public places. > > An ounce of prevention is worth… …about $150 if it’s really good stuff. There was a farmer who had a dog and… ---
**Author:** ![buttonjockey308](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bcef8e/32.png) [@buttonjockey308](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buttonjockey308)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2004, 2:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/528 "2004-07-17T02:54:03Z")
> [@Rufus Xavier](#): > > There was a farmer who had a dog and… …accidentally sucked him up in the combine. Here I sit, broken hearted… ---
**Author:** ![matt\_mcl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2004, 3:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/529 "2004-07-17T03:18:27Z")
because my BC Bud’s bogarted. Hark the Herald Angels Sing… ---
**Author:** ![ZombiesAteMyBrain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/b4bc9f/32.png) [@ZombiesAteMyBrain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZombiesAteMyBrain)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2004, 2:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/530 "2004-07-17T14:03:02Z")
> [@matt\_mcl](#): > > Hark the Herald Angels Sing… Don’t to Bush’s doctrines cling!!! Truth is always the first casualty… ---
**Author:** ![Governor\_Quinn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/d26b3c/32.png) [@Governor\_Quinn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Governor_Quinn)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2004, 2:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/531 "2004-07-17T14:59:59Z")
…because Truth always darts ahead, making itself a target of snipers and enemy artillery fire. Half a league, half a league… ---
**Author:** ![ZombiesAteMyBrain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/b4bc9f/32.png) [@ZombiesAteMyBrain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZombiesAteMyBrain)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2004, 5:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/532 "2004-07-17T17:22:46Z")
> [@Governor Quinn](#): > > …Half a league, half a league… Dammit, I mighta known that those ‘Seven League Boots’ wouldn’t perform as advertised. That lousy giant will be hearing from my lawyer!! Full fathom five thy father … ---
**Author:** ![Governor\_Quinn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/d26b3c/32.png) [@Governor\_Quinn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Governor_Quinn)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2004, 9:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/533 "2004-07-17T21:22:28Z")
…Because heaven knows full fathom four is useless! Now is the winter of our… ---
**Author:** ![vexinvixen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/df705f/32.png) [@vexinvixen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vexinvixen)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2004, 1:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/534 "2004-07-18T01:21:54Z")
> [@matt\_mcl](#): > > you don’t use a high enough SPF. > > Ceci n’est pas… …le plat que j’ai commande. I know you think you understand what you thought I meant, but I wonder if you realize… ---
**Author:** ![vexinvixen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/df705f/32.png) [@vexinvixen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vexinvixen)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2004, 1:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/535 "2004-07-18T01:34:18Z")
> [@LeeshaJoy](#): > > …dictionary between “loutish” and “lowbrow.” > > I never met a man… …who knew how to put the toilet seat down! :mad: ---
**Author:** ![vexinvixen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/df705f/32.png) [@vexinvixen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vexinvixen)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2004, 1:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/536 "2004-07-18T01:38:52Z")
> [@matt\_mcl](#): > > …a decorative montage of my enemies’ testicles. > > Plus ça change… …plus on est perdu. 😛 Oh say, can you… ---
**Author:** ![vexinvixen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/df705f/32.png) [@vexinvixen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vexinvixen)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2004, 1:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/537 "2004-07-18T01:53:30Z")
> [@nocturnal\_tick](#): > > …LSD. > > …it’s because you’re blind. > Men are from Mars… Let’s send 'em back! One potato, two potato… ---
**Author:** ![emekthian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ecae2f/32.png) [@emekthian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/emekthian)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2004, 4:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/538 "2004-07-18T04:14:28Z")
up the tailpipes of two Camaros. I have come. But I do not now choose to do what I came to do. I will not… ---
**Author:** ![Governor\_Quinn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/d26b3c/32.png) [@Governor\_Quinn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Governor_Quinn)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2004, 2:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/539 "2004-07-18T14:30:34Z")
…stop posting these lines until someone responds to these lines! Ask me no questions, I’ll tell you… ---
**Author:** ![ZombiesAteMyBrain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/b4bc9f/32.png) [@ZombiesAteMyBrain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZombiesAteMyBrain)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2004, 2:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/540 "2004-07-18T14:53:37Z")
> [@Governor Quinn](#): > > Ask me no questions, I’ll tell you… a load of codswallop. Those who do not remember History … [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931.md?page=26) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931.md?page=28)