# If life gives you lemons... **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [June 24, 2004, 2:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931 "2004-06-24T02:27:35Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 30
**Author:** ![Governor\_Quinn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/d26b3c/32.png) [@Governor\_Quinn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Governor_Quinn)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2004, 8:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/581 "2004-07-21T20:11:01Z")
… and we all know how that’ll go. Wink wink, nudge nudge, say… ---
**Author:** ![Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ac8455/32.png) [@Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bippy_the_Beardless)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2004, 8:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/582 "2004-07-21T20:24:38Z")
> [@Governor Quinn](#): > > Wink wink, nudge nudge, say… … is that an elephant in your pajamas, or are you just happy to see me. Two’s company, but three’s a … ---
**Author:** ![Governor\_Quinn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/d26b3c/32.png) [@Governor\_Quinn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Governor_Quinn)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2004, 9:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/583 "2004-07-21T21:13:44Z")
…bit too many to live in that closet. Farewell and adieu to you fair… ---
**Author:** ![ZombiesAteMyBrain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/b4bc9f/32.png) [@ZombiesAteMyBrain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZombiesAteMyBrain)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2004, 12:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/584 "2004-07-22T00:47:53Z")
> [@Governor Quinn](#): > > … > Farewell and adieu to you fair… politicians - the government has a plan to get rid of you, and sharpish! _ **Fair politicians** _ is a sort of oxymoron nowadays, anyhow. He went after it like … ---
**Author:** ![emekthian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ecae2f/32.png) [@emekthian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/emekthian)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2004, 3:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/585 "2004-07-22T03:39:18Z")
… it was a combination vagina/ ultrapowerful electromagnet, and he was a combination desperately horny man/ large ball of iron The girl who overcame time and the boy who was… ---
**Author:** ![BJMoose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/5fc32e/32.png) [@BJMoose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BJMoose)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2004, 2:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/586 "2004-07-22T14:44:08Z")
. . . happy that she finally came, over time. Don’t change horses . . . ---
**Author:** ![Governor\_Quinn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/d26b3c/32.png) [@Governor\_Quinn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Governor_Quinn)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2004, 2:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/587 "2004-07-22T14:55:09Z")
…in the middle of a race. My old Kentucky… ---
**Author:** ![photopat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/e95f7d/32.png) [@photopat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/photopat)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2004, 3:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/588 "2004-07-22T15:13:15Z")
> [@Governor Quinn](#): > > …in the middle of a race. > > My old Kentucky… Fried Chicken is now “kitchen fresh chicken,” whatever the hell that means. As if it’ll fool people into thinking it’s good for them all of a sudden. If I was the Colonel I’d be taking my cane to the PR person who came up with that one. Little Miss Muffet sat on a… ---
**Author:** ![Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ac8455/32.png) [@Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bippy_the_Beardless)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2004, 3:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/589 "2004-07-22T15:31:17Z")
Little Miss Muffet sat on a… … [18"DHIBJD](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=266235) Don’t step on my blue … ---
**Author:** ![ZombiesAteMyBrain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/b4bc9f/32.png) [@ZombiesAteMyBrain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZombiesAteMyBrain)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2004, 3:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/590 "2004-07-22T15:35:29Z")
> [@photopat](#): > > Little Miss Muffet sat on a… anthill - got covered in ants, and had to rip all her clothes off PDQ. Some days you’re the dog… ---
**Author:** ![Rufus\_Xavier](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/eada6e/32.png) [@Rufus\_Xavier](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rufus_Xavier)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2004, 3:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/591 "2004-07-22T15:49:34Z")
> [@Bippy the Beardless](#): > > Little Miss Muffet sat on a… > > … [18"DHIBJD](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=266235) > Don’t step on my blue … …jelly dong. Some days you’re the dog… …all days in Russia, dog is you. The secret of joy in work is contained in one word: ---
**Author:** ![Rock\_n\_Roach](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Rock\_n\_Roach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rock_n_Roach)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2004, 5:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/592 "2004-07-22T17:00:27Z")
> [@Rufus Xavier](#): > > The secret of joy in work is contained in one word: Payday !! (but shhhh, don’t tell anybody) If it weren’t for bad luck… ---
**Author:** ![emekthian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ecae2f/32.png) [@emekthian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/emekthian)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2004, 5:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/593 "2004-07-22T17:18:50Z")
…I would’ve turned right at the intersection on that fateful day, and never encountered the evil frog. Beer is proof that God… ---
**Author:** ![Governor\_Quinn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/d26b3c/32.png) [@Governor\_Quinn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Governor_Quinn)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2004, 9:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/594 "2004-07-22T21:28:01Z")
…is out to get you all. Don’t shoot until you see… ---
**Author:** ![buttonjockey308](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bcef8e/32.png) [@buttonjockey308](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buttonjockey308)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2004, 9:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/595 "2004-07-22T21:52:19Z")
…whether or not I’m a politician. Good things come to those… ---
**Author:** ![Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ac8455/32.png) [@Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bippy_the_Beardless)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2004, 10:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/596 "2004-07-22T22:06:52Z")
> [@buttonjockey308](#): > > Good things come to those… … who cheat most. It’s like the pot calling the kettle … ---
**Author:** ![Lobsang](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lobsang/32/4067_2.png) [@Lobsang](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lobsang)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2004, 10:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/597 "2004-07-22T22:13:39Z")
> [@Bippy the Beardless](#): > > It’s like the pot calling the kettle … …on the phone and saying “This guy’s being a hypocrit, kettle.” With great responsibility comes… ---
**Author:** ![Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ac8455/32.png) [@Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bippy_the_Beardless)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2004, 10:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/598 "2004-07-22T22:22:19Z")
> [@buttonjockey308](#): > > Good things come to those… … who cheat most. It’s like the pot calling the kettle … ---
**Author:** ![ZombiesAteMyBrain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/b4bc9f/32.png) [@ZombiesAteMyBrain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZombiesAteMyBrain)\ **Post date:** [July 23, 2004, 1:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/599 "2004-07-23T01:12:52Z")
> [@Lobsang](#): > > … > With great responsibility comes… gynormous headaches, anxiety, panic attacks, and premature baldness. Is the glass half full or … ---
**Author:** ![buttonjockey308](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bcef8e/32.png) [@buttonjockey308](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buttonjockey308)\ **Post date:** [July 23, 2004, 2:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931/600 "2004-07-23T02:11:15Z")
It’s like the pot calling the kettle … …And cancelling for saturday with a serious handle ache. Is the glass half full or… …Am I too drunk to care? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931.md?page=29) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-gives-you-lemons/251931.md?page=31)