# If life is a rock and the radio rolls me... **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [March 30, 2002, 10:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-is-a-rock-and-the-radio-rolls-me/100975 "2002-03-30T22:52:52Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 29
**Author:** ![flygirl99](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/46a35a/32.png) [@flygirl99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/flygirl99)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2002, 6:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-is-a-rock-and-the-radio-rolls-me/100975/561 "2002-05-02T18:35:47Z")
good one heathen - I’d agree anything by Frankie Lane or Enya should be uber dreck! What about that horrible Robert Mitchem abortion “The Legend of Thunder Road” or perhaps most (if not all) spoken records - pure crapulence! ---
**Author:** ![flygirl99](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/46a35a/32.png) [@flygirl99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/flygirl99)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2002, 6:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-is-a-rock-and-the-radio-rolls-me/100975/562 "2002-05-02T18:41:38Z")
Oohh You never close your eyes anymore when I kiss your lips. Well what I want to know is, how the hell would I know whether you were closing your eyes or not if my eyes were closed? ---
**Author:** ![happyheathen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b5e925/32.png) [@happyheathen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/happyheathen)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2002, 6:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-is-a-rock-and-the-radio-rolls-me/100975/563 "2002-05-02T18:49:37Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by flygirl99 \* > \*\*good one heathen - I’d agree anything by Frankie Lane or Enya should be uber dreck! > What about that horrible Robert Mitchem abortion > “The Legend of Thunder Road” or perhaps most (if not all) spoken records - pure crapulence! \*\* _ **Lyrics!** _ we must have _ **Lyrics!** _ [sub]Don’t it make you want to go home, now Don’t it make you want to go home. All God’s children get weary when they roam And don’t it make you want to go home…[/sub] p.s. that last one was “You’ve Lost That Loving Feeling” - borderline dreck at best… ---
**Author:** ![John\_Carter\_of\_Mars](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/2bfe46/32.png) [@John\_Carter\_of\_Mars](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Carter_of_Mars)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2002, 8:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-is-a-rock-and-the-radio-rolls-me/100975/564 "2002-05-02T20:52:54Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by happyheathen \* > \*\* > > ## Originally posted by flygirl99 What about that horrible Robert Mitchem abortion “The Legend of Thunder Road” > > _ **Lyrics!** _ we must have _ **Lyrics!** _ > > \*\* Comin’ to **flygirl99’s** aid here: Thunder, thunder over thunder road Thunder was his engine and white lightnin’ was his load Moonshine, moonshine to quench the devil’s thirst Lawmen swore to get him but the Devil got him first (IIRC) 🆒 ---
**Author:** ![happyheathen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b5e925/32.png) [@happyheathen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/happyheathen)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2002, 10:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-is-a-rock-and-the-radio-rolls-me/100975/565 "2002-05-02T22:07:36Z")
“A-robbin’ people with a six-gun I fought the law and the law won…” [sub]…I’m just a bit of a shade hungover Come on baby do a slow float You’re a good lookin’ riverboat And ain’t that sweet eyed blindness good to me… [/sub] ---
**Author:** ![Rico](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rico/32/3582_2.png) [@Rico](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rico)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2002, 11:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-is-a-rock-and-the-radio-rolls-me/100975/566 "2002-05-02T23:13:57Z")
The night was clear and the moon was yellow And the leaves came tumbling down I was standing on the corner when I heard my bulldog bark He was barkin’ at the two men who were gamblin’ in the dark It was Stagger Lee and Billy, two men who gambled late Stagger Lee threw seven, Billy swore that he threw eight Stagger Lee told Billy, “I can’t let you go with that” “You have won all my money and my brand new stetson hat” Stagger Lee started off goin’ down that railroad track He said “I can’t get you Billy but don’t be here when I come back” ---
**Author:** ![JohnM](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/848f3c/32.png) [@JohnM](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnM)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2002, 11:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-is-a-rock-and-the-radio-rolls-me/100975/567 "2002-05-02T23:30:49Z")
You are all responsible for me wasting valuable work time, because I just read the whole freaking thread. Just for that, I present: Turn on your heartlight Let it shine whereever you go Let it make a happy glow For all the world to see Turn on your heartlight In the middle of a young boy’s dream Don’t wake me up too soon Gonna take a ride across the moon You and me (Thank God this hasn’t been revived during the re-release of the movie which inspired it.) ---
**Author:** ![happyheathen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b5e925/32.png) [@happyheathen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/happyheathen)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2002, 12:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-is-a-rock-and-the-radio-rolls-me/100975/568 "2002-05-03T00:54:18Z")
“Danke schoen, darling, danke schoen…” ---
**Author:** ![JohnM](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/848f3c/32.png) [@JohnM](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnM)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2002, 12:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-is-a-rock-and-the-radio-rolls-me/100975/569 "2002-05-03T00:58:35Z")
Okay, how about: He hit me and it felt like a kiss He hit me but it didn’t hurt me He couldn’t stand to hear me say That I’d been with someone new And when I told him I had been untrue (Proof that even a good writer can produce dreck, and offensive dreck at that.) ---
**Author:** ![John\_Carter\_of\_Mars](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/2bfe46/32.png) [@John\_Carter\_of\_Mars](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Carter_of_Mars)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2002, 1:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-is-a-rock-and-the-radio-rolls-me/100975/570 "2002-05-03T01:05:07Z")
Bluejean baby, with your big blue eyes Don’t want you lookin’, at other guys Got to make you give me, one more chance I can’t keep still so baby let’s dance Well the bluejean bop is the bop for me It’s the bop that’s done in a dungaree You dip your hip, free your knee Squeal on your heal Baby, one-two three “Bluejean Bop” by Gene Vincent, 1959 ---
**Author:** ![JohnM](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/848f3c/32.png) [@JohnM](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnM)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2002, 1:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-is-a-rock-and-the-radio-rolls-me/100975/571 "2002-05-03T01:12:51Z")
Right back atcha: We are young, heartache to heartache we stand No promises, no demands, love is a battlefield ---
**Author:** ![JohnM](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/848f3c/32.png) [@JohnM](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnM)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2002, 1:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-is-a-rock-and-the-radio-rolls-me/100975/572 "2002-05-03T01:20:41Z")
One more, before I head out for a couple pints at Victory Brewing (shameless plug for anyone in the Philly suburbs): Relax don’t do it When you want to go to it Relax don’t do it When you want to come Relax don’t do it When you want to come When you want to come ---
**Author:** ![happyheathen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b5e925/32.png) [@happyheathen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/happyheathen)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2002, 1:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-is-a-rock-and-the-radio-rolls-me/100975/573 "2002-05-03T01:26:29Z")
“borrowing” songs from other threads is discouraged 😛 “And I’m proud to be a Okie from Muskogee A place where even squares can have a ball We still wave Ol’ Glory down at the courthouse And white lightnin’s still the biggest thrill of all…” ---
**Author:** ![JohnM](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/848f3c/32.png) [@JohnM](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnM)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2002, 1:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-is-a-rock-and-the-radio-rolls-me/100975/574 "2002-05-03T01:38:29Z")
**happyheathen** , No borrowing, I swear, officer! Just simple wracking of my brain followed by Googling. But, since you’ve gone all C&W on us, I have to give it one more shot before heading for that beer: Our D-I-V-O-R-C-E becomes final today Me and little J-O-E will be goin’ away I love you both and it will be pure H-E double L for me Oh, I wish that we could stop this D-I-V-O-R-C-E ---
**Author:** ![happyheathen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b5e925/32.png) [@happyheathen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/happyheathen)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2002, 1:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-is-a-rock-and-the-radio-rolls-me/100975/575 "2002-05-03T01:38:31Z")
(but it’s usually the newbie…) DRECK! we are looking for DRECK! ---
**Author:** ![JohnM](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/848f3c/32.png) [@JohnM](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnM)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2002, 1:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-is-a-rock-and-the-radio-rolls-me/100975/576 "2002-05-03T01:40:27Z")
Newbie though I be, I will defend my selection of “Relax” as purest dreck from beyond the eighth dimension with my dying breath. ---
**Author:** ![happyheathen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b5e925/32.png) [@happyheathen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/happyheathen)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2002, 2:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-is-a-rock-and-the-radio-rolls-me/100975/577 "2002-05-03T02:10:52Z")
If we give you “Relax”, you’re still batting .167! Try Harder! “You can gamble for match sticks You can gamble for gold The stakes may be heavy or small But if you haven’t gambled for love and lost Then you haven’t gambled at all…” Moonlight Gambler ---
**Author:** ![Rico](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rico/32/3582_2.png) [@Rico](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rico)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2002, 3:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-is-a-rock-and-the-radio-rolls-me/100975/578 "2002-05-03T03:40:17Z")
Jump on outta bed and I stumble to the kitchen Pour myself a cup of ambition And yawn and stretch and try to come to life Jump in the shower and the blood starts pumpin’ Out on the street the traffic starts jumpin’ With folks like me on the job from 9 to 5 Workin’ 9 to 5, what a way to make a livin’ Barely gettin’ by, it’s all takin’ and no givin’ They just use your mind and they never give you credit It’s enough to drive you crazy if you let it 9 to 5, for service and devotion You would think that I would deserve a fat promotion Want to move ahead but the boss won’t seem to let me I swear sometimes that man is out to get me! and before you scream “No Country!” I’ll point out that Dolly Parton held Number 1 on the Billboard Pop Charts with that song in 1980. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![happyheathen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b5e925/32.png) [@happyheathen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/happyheathen)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2002, 4:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-is-a-rock-and-the-radio-rolls-me/100975/579 "2002-05-03T04:22:57Z")
“Does she walk? Does she talk? Does she come complete? My homeroom homeroom angel Always pulled me from my seat She was pure like snowflakes No one could ever stain The memory of my angel Could never cause me pain Years go by I’m looking through a girlie magazine And there’s my homeroom angel on the pages in-between” [sub]Too fast to live, Too young to die, Bye-bye[/sub] ---
**Author:** ![Hometownboy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/5e9695/32.png) [@Hometownboy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hometownboy)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2002, 4:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-is-a-rock-and-the-radio-rolls-me/100975/580 "2002-05-03T04:40:08Z")
Dropping back in again for a short time with one of the odder corners of the oldies chart, compelete with straight-outta-Freud lyrics ::cue pictures of trains going into tunnels:: Some velvet morning when I’m straight I’m going to open up your gate And maybe tell you 'bout Phaedra And how she took me in [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-is-a-rock-and-the-radio-rolls-me/100975.md?page=28) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-life-is-a-rock-and-the-radio-rolls-me/100975.md?page=30)