good one heathen - I’d agree anything by Frankie Lane or Enya should be uber dreck!
What about that horrible Robert Mitchem abortion
“The Legend of Thunder Road” or perhaps most (if not all) spoken records - pure crapulence!
Oohh
You never close your eyes anymore when I kiss your lips.
Well what I want to know is, how the hell would I know whether you were closing your eyes or not if my eyes were closed?
Lyrics! we must have Lyrics!
[sub]Don’t it make you want to go home, now
Don’t it make you want to go home.
All God’s children get weary when they roam
And don’t it make you want to go home…[/sub]
p.s. that last one was “You’ve Lost That Loving Feeling” - borderline dreck at best…
Comin’ to flygirl99’s aid here:
Thunder, thunder over thunder road
Thunder was his engine and white lightnin’ was his load
Moonshine, moonshine to quench the devil’s thirst
Lawmen swore to get him but the Devil got him first
(IIRC) 
“A-robbin’ people with a six-gun
I fought the law and the law won…”
[sub]…I’m just a bit of a shade hungover
Come on baby do a slow float
You’re a good lookin’ riverboat
And ain’t that sweet eyed blindness good to me…
[/sub]
The night was clear and the moon was yellow
And the leaves came tumbling down
I was standing on the corner when I heard my bulldog bark
He was barkin’ at the two men who were gamblin’ in the dark
It was Stagger Lee and Billy, two men who gambled late
Stagger Lee threw seven, Billy swore that he threw eight
Stagger Lee told Billy, “I can’t let you go with that”
“You have won all my money and my brand new stetson hat”
Stagger Lee started off goin’ down that railroad track
He said “I can’t get you Billy but don’t be here when I come back”
You are all responsible for me wasting valuable work time, because I just read the whole freaking thread. Just for that, I present:
Turn on your heartlight
Let it shine whereever you go
Let it make a happy glow
For all the world to see
Turn on your heartlight
In the middle of a young boy’s dream
Don’t wake me up too soon
Gonna take a ride across the moon
You and me
(Thank God this hasn’t been revived during the re-release of the movie which inspired it.)
“Danke schoen, darling, danke schoen…”
Okay, how about:
He hit me and it felt like a kiss
He hit me but it didn’t hurt me
He couldn’t stand to hear me say
That I’d been with someone new
And when I told him
I had been untrue
(Proof that even a good writer can produce dreck, and offensive dreck at that.)
Bluejean baby, with your big blue eyes
Don’t want you lookin’, at other guys
Got to make you give me, one more chance
I can’t keep still so baby let’s dance
Well the bluejean bop is the bop for me
It’s the bop that’s done in a dungaree
You dip your hip, free your knee
Squeal on your heal Baby, one-two three
“Bluejean Bop” by Gene Vincent, 1959
Right back atcha:
We are young, heartache to heartache we stand
No promises, no demands, love is a battlefield
One more, before I head out for a couple pints at Victory Brewing (shameless plug for anyone in the Philly suburbs):
Relax don’t do it
When you want to go to it
Relax don’t do it
When you want to come
Relax don’t do it
When you want to come
When you want to come
“borrowing” songs from other threads is discouraged 
“And I’m proud to be a Okie from Muskogee
A place where even squares can have a ball
We still wave Ol’ Glory down at the courthouse
And white lightnin’s still the biggest thrill of all…”
happyheathen,
No borrowing, I swear, officer! Just simple wracking of my brain followed by Googling.
But, since you’ve gone all C&W on us, I have to give it one more shot before heading for that beer:
Our D-I-V-O-R-C-E becomes final today
Me and little J-O-E will be goin’ away
I love you both and it will be pure H-E double L for me
Oh, I wish that we could stop this D-I-V-O-R-C-E
(but it’s usually the newbie…)
DRECK! we are looking for DRECK!
Newbie though I be, I will defend my selection of “Relax” as purest dreck from beyond the eighth dimension with my dying breath.
If we give you “Relax”, you’re still batting .167! Try Harder!
“You can gamble for match sticks
You can gamble for gold
The stakes may be heavy or small
But if you haven’t gambled for love and lost
Then you haven’t gambled at all…”
Moonlight Gambler
Jump on outta bed and I stumble to the kitchen
Pour myself a cup of ambition
And yawn and stretch and try to come to life
Jump in the shower and the blood starts pumpin’
Out on the street the traffic starts jumpin’
With folks like me on the job from 9 to 5
Workin’ 9 to 5, what a way to make a livin’
Barely gettin’ by, it’s all takin’ and no givin’
They just use your mind and they never give you credit
It’s enough to drive you crazy if you let it
9 to 5, for service and devotion
You would think that I would deserve a fat promotion
Want to move ahead but the boss won’t seem to let me
I swear sometimes that man is out to get me!
and before you scream “No Country!” I’ll point out that Dolly Parton held Number 1 on the Billboard Pop Charts with that song in 1980.
“Does she walk? Does she talk?
Does she come complete?
My homeroom homeroom angel
Always pulled me from my seat
She was pure like snowflakes
No one could ever stain
The memory of my angel
Could never cause me pain
Years go by I’m looking through a girlie magazine
And there’s my homeroom angel on the pages in-between”
[sub]Too fast to live, Too young to die, Bye-bye[/sub]
Dropping back in again for a short time with one of the odder corners of the oldies chart, compelete with straight-outta-Freud lyrics
::cue pictures of trains going into tunnels::
Some velvet morning when I’m straight
I’m going to open up your gate
And maybe tell you 'bout Phaedra
And how she took me in