# If New York City is destroyed, what will the headlines say? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [December 21, 2021, 3:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-new-york-city-is-destroyed-what-will-the-headlines-say/956394 "2021-12-21T03:14:19Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2021, 3:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-new-york-city-is-destroyed-what-will-the-headlines-say/956394/1 "2021-12-21T03:14:19Z")
A meteor hits and all five boroughs are erased, population of 8,804,190 distributed over 300.46 square miles gone. What would be the headlines in various newspapers, magazines, and television networks etc.? Please give source, then imaginary headline. I’ll start with an easy one: _Variety_ - “SNL Cancelled!” ---
**Author:** ![burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/burpo_the_wonder_mutt/32/365_2.png) [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2021, 3:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-new-york-city-is-destroyed-what-will-the-headlines-say/956394/2 "2021-12-21T03:19:59Z")
“Big Apple Cored” ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2021, 3:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-new-york-city-is-destroyed-what-will-the-headlines-say/956394/3 "2021-12-21T03:21:46Z")
“Stock Market Crashes,Wall Street Craters” ---
**Author:** ![kenobi\_65](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kenobi_65/32/13178_2.png) [@kenobi\_65](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kenobi_65)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2021, 3:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-new-york-city-is-destroyed-what-will-the-headlines-say/956394/4 "2021-12-21T03:24:42Z")
“Billy Joel Was Right” [![](https://img.youtube.com/vi/Az1FSLfZxH4/maxresdefault.jpg "Miami 2017 (Seen The Lights Go Out On Broadway) - Billy Joel") ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Az1FSLfZxH4) ---
**Author:** ![Riemann](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/riemann/32/3133_2.png) [@Riemann](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Riemann)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2021, 3:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-new-york-city-is-destroyed-what-will-the-headlines-say/956394/5 "2021-12-21T03:25:41Z")
> [@Czarcasm](#): > > population of 8,804,190 8,704,190 non-lawyers killed in NY meteor tragedy ---
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2021, 3:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-new-york-city-is-destroyed-what-will-the-headlines-say/956394/6 "2021-12-21T03:26:22Z")
Please give the source for those imaginary headlines. ---
**Author:** ![lum\_s\_husband](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lum_s_husband/32/3698_2.png) [@lum\_s\_husband](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lum_s_husband)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2021, 3:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-new-york-city-is-destroyed-what-will-the-headlines-say/956394/7 "2021-12-21T03:29:39Z")
“Long National Nightmare Ends” ---
**Author:** ![flurb](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/51bf81/32.png) [@flurb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/flurb)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2021, 3:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-new-york-city-is-destroyed-what-will-the-headlines-say/956394/8 "2021-12-21T03:33:51Z")
New York _Daily News_: “GOD TO CITY: DROP DEAD” ---
**Author:** ![Riemann](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/riemann/32/3133_2.png) [@Riemann](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Riemann)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2021, 3:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-new-york-city-is-destroyed-what-will-the-headlines-say/956394/9 "2021-12-21T03:35:16Z")
_Children’s Health Defense newsletter_ - “Millions of vaccinated children die in New York” ---
**Author:** ![Riemann](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/riemann/32/3133_2.png) [@Riemann](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Riemann)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2021, 3:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-new-york-city-is-destroyed-what-will-the-headlines-say/956394/10 "2021-12-21T03:37:40Z")
_OANN_ - “Donald Trump won 2020 Presidential Election, evidence to be revealed in two weeks” ---
**Author:** ![Kent\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kent_clark/32/105_2.png) [@Kent\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kent_Clark)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2021, 3:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-new-york-city-is-destroyed-what-will-the-headlines-say/956394/11 "2021-12-21T03:44:23Z")
_New York Times_ - Manhattan, Other Boroughs Feel Strike Impact _New York Daily News_ - Mayor Calls for Meteor Study _New York Post_ - City Goes Boom! _Wall Street Journal_ - NYSE Delays Opening ---
**Author:** ![kenobi\_65](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kenobi_65/32/13178_2.png) [@kenobi\_65](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kenobi_65)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2021, 3:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-new-york-city-is-destroyed-what-will-the-headlines-say/956394/12 "2021-12-21T03:46:49Z")
> [@Czarcasm](#): > > Please give the source for those imaginary headlines. > [@kenobi\_65](#): > > “Billy Joel Was Right” Mine’s from _Rolling Stone_. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Riemann](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/riemann/32/3133_2.png) [@Riemann](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Riemann)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2021, 3:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-new-york-city-is-destroyed-what-will-the-headlines-say/956394/13 "2021-12-21T03:46:50Z")
_The Economist_ - “Uncertain outlook for interest rates as consumer spending drops sharply” ---
**Author:** ![Riemann](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/riemann/32/3133_2.png) [@Riemann](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Riemann)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2021, 3:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-new-york-city-is-destroyed-what-will-the-headlines-say/956394/14 "2021-12-21T03:57:29Z")
_WWG1WGA Weekly_ - “Storm begins as Trump moves against thousands of pizza parlors simultaneously” ---
**Author:** ![don\_t\_ask](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@don\_t\_ask](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/don_t_ask)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2021, 3:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-new-york-city-is-destroyed-what-will-the-headlines-say/956394/15 "2021-12-21T03:59:05Z")
_New York Daily News_ - There go the Knicks playoff hopes! ---
**Author:** ![Riemann](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/riemann/32/3133_2.png) [@Riemann](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Riemann)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2021, 4:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-new-york-city-is-destroyed-what-will-the-headlines-say/956394/16 "2021-12-21T04:11:06Z")
_Fox News_ - “Biden Infrastructure Plan In Tatters As Deficit Soars” ---
**Author:** ![Riemann](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/riemann/32/3133_2.png) [@Riemann](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Riemann)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2021, 4:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-new-york-city-is-destroyed-what-will-the-headlines-say/956394/17 "2021-12-21T04:18:56Z")
_NRA Monthly_ - “Unconstitutional Gun Legislation Left NY Populace Defenseless” ---
**Author:** ![Thing.Fish](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thing.fish/32/9168_2.png) [@Thing.Fish](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Thing.Fish)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2021, 4:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-new-york-city-is-destroyed-what-will-the-headlines-say/956394/18 "2021-12-21T04:34:52Z")
538: “NY Likely To Lose Multiple Congressional Seats at Next Reapportionment” ---
**Author:** ![Riemann](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/riemann/32/3133_2.png) [@Riemann](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Riemann)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2021, 4:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-new-york-city-is-destroyed-what-will-the-headlines-say/956394/19 "2021-12-21T04:46:50Z")
_US Weekly_ - “Kylie Jenner Debuts All-Black Fashion Line, Profits To Memorial Fund” ---
**Author:** ![superwombat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/superwombat/32/16616_2.png) [@superwombat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/superwombat)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2021, 4:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-new-york-city-is-destroyed-what-will-the-headlines-say/956394/20 "2021-12-21T04:48:12Z")
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