# If only there had been a comma... (Man killed by alligator) **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [July 6, 2015, 6:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-only-there-had-been-a-comma-man-killed-by-alligator/724406 "2015-07-06T18:05:59Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 14\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2015, 1:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-only-there-had-been-a-comma-man-killed-by-alligator/724406/81 "2015-07-09T13:57:54Z")
> [@Colibri](#): > > [Photos](https://metrouk2.files.wordpress.com/2015/07/ad_174375425.jpg?quality=80&strip=all&strip=all&w=768&h=576&crop=1) of the [victim,](http://d.ibtimes.co.uk/en/full/1446932/tommie-woodward-alligator-attack-victim.jpg?w=368) [Tommie Woodward](http://ww4.hdnux.com/photos/37/37/57/8256467/3/920x920.jpg), make it less surprising that he met his fate in this way. Yes, the Force of redneck is strong in that one I fear. ---
**Author:** ![Malthus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/85f322/32.png) [@Malthus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malthus)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2015, 2:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-only-there-had-been-a-comma-man-killed-by-alligator/724406/82 "2015-07-09T14:02:20Z")
> [@Boyo\_Jim](#): > > He’s pretty much exactly how I imagined him, right down to the key chain dangling from his ear. Surely a fishing lure would have been more appropriate. ---
**Author:** ![kopek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kopek/32/337_2.png) [@kopek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kopek)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2015, 2:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-only-there-had-been-a-comma-man-killed-by-alligator/724406/83 "2015-07-09T14:53:59Z")
> [@Malthus](#): > > Surely a fishing lure would have been more appropriate. Or a toe-tag. Looking at him you just know he was going to need it one way or another. ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2015, 3:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-only-there-had-been-a-comma-man-killed-by-alligator/724406/84 "2015-07-09T15:43:21Z")
From his pictures, they may as well have put a toe tag on him the moment he was able to walk far enough to be out of sight of his mom. After that it was just a matter of time. ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2015, 3:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-only-there-had-been-a-comma-man-killed-by-alligator/724406/85 "2015-07-09T15:44:22Z")
> [@PlainJain](#): > > This is easily one of the funniest things I’ve read on these boards in a good long while. Remember, I provided the setup line. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2015, 3:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-only-there-had-been-a-comma-man-killed-by-alligator/724406/86 "2015-07-09T15:53:44Z")
> [@RivkahChaya](#): > > It demonstrates that he was aware of the sign and didn’t give a fuck, not that he didn’t see the sign, or didn’t understand it. Yup, that’s a very typical attitude for an alligator. ---
**Author:** ![Spiderman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spiderman/32/230_2.png) [@Spiderman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spiderman)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2015, 5:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-only-there-had-been-a-comma-man-killed-by-alligator/724406/87 "2015-07-09T17:32:11Z")
> [@Colibri](#): > > [Photos](https://metrouk2.files.wordpress.com/2015/07/ad_174375425.jpg?quality=80&strip=all&strip=all&w=768&h=576&crop=1) of the [victim,](http://d.ibtimes.co.uk/en/full/1446932/tommie-woodward-alligator-attack-victim.jpg?w=368) **[Tommie Woodward](http://ww4.hdnux.com/photos/37/37/57/8256467/3/920x920.jpg)**, make it less surprising that he met his fate in this way. > [@Boyo\_Jim](#): > > He’s pretty much exactly how I imagined him, right down to the key chain dangling from his ear. I have ears, which I only use for hearing. On occasion, I misplace my keys. This guy’s a freakin’ genius for realizing there’s multiple uses for one’s ears besides hearing; they can also be used to prevent lost keys while at the same time storing a handy-dandy ear scratcher just inches from where one needs it. Could be the first person in history to end up with both a Darwin & a Nobel! 🆒 ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2015, 5:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-only-there-had-been-a-comma-man-killed-by-alligator/724406/88 "2015-07-09T17:38:27Z")
Maybe an IgNobel too, for a dembest experiment. And maybe even a Razzie. I understand his death throes weren’t especially convincing, even followed by a genuine death. ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2015, 5:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-only-there-had-been-a-comma-man-killed-by-alligator/724406/89 "2015-07-09T17:49:06Z")
> [@Colibri](#): > > Photos of the victim,[Tommie Woodward](http://ww4.hdnux.com/photos/37/37/57/8256467/3/920x920.jpg), make it less surprising that he met his fate in this way. Honestly, which came first, Tommie or the yard lamp? ---
**Author:** ![Wile\_E](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c37758/32.png) [@Wile\_E](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wile_E)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2015, 6:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-only-there-had-been-a-comma-man-killed-by-alligator/724406/90 "2015-07-09T18:55:45Z")
> [@FXMastermind](#): > > For those who don’t follow stories, the gator was killed. Police are sure it was a revenge killing, since the dead gator was left on the boat ramp. And the good old boys who killed it said it was for revenge. Great, then the gators are going to want to retaliate for Chomper who was simply minding his own business when someone threw a tasty redneck in front of him. What was he supposed to do? It looks like this will be the start of an all-out Gator-Redneck war. ---
**Author:** ![Doctor\_Jackson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doctor_jackson/32/32_2.png) [@Doctor\_Jackson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doctor_Jackson)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2015, 7:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-only-there-had-been-a-comma-man-killed-by-alligator/724406/91 "2015-07-09T19:09:13Z")
> [@Mollie\_Magill](#): > > This is why Texas needs to outlaw bestiality. > [@Czarcasm](#): > > Let’s not be hasty, here. Every day people die in flagrante delicto with other human(s), but one alligator gets involved and folk want laws… ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2015, 7:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-only-there-had-been-a-comma-man-killed-by-alligator/724406/92 "2015-07-09T19:32:45Z")
> [@Doctor\_Jackson](#): > > Every day people die in flagrante delicto with other human(s), but one alligator gets involved and folk want laws… In flagrante _delectable?_ ---
**Author:** ![Malthus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/85f322/32.png) [@Malthus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malthus)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2015, 7:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-only-there-had-been-a-comma-man-killed-by-alligator/724406/93 "2015-07-09T19:33:33Z")
> [@Johnny\_L.A](#): > > In flagrante _delectable?_ Do not ask for oral. ---
**Author:** ![Enright3](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/enright3/32/2897_2.png) [@Enright3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enright3)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2015, 7:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-only-there-had-been-a-comma-man-killed-by-alligator/724406/94 "2015-07-09T19:54:18Z")
> [@Colibri](#): > > [Photos](https://metrouk2.files.wordpress.com/2015/07/ad_174375425.jpg?quality=80&strip=all&strip=all&w=768&h=576&crop=1) of the [victim,](http://d.ibtimes.co.uk/en/full/1446932/tommie-woodward-alligator-attack-victim.jpg?w=368) [Tommie Woodward](http://ww4.hdnux.com/photos/37/37/57/8256467/3/920x920.jpg), make it less surprising that he met his fate in this way. > [@Boyo\_Jim](#): > > He’s pretty much exactly how I imagined him, right down to the key chain dangling from his ear. > [@LSLGuy](#): > > Yes, the Force of redneck is strong in that one I fear. > [@Boyo\_Jim](#): > > From his pictures, they may as well have put a toe tag on him the moment he was able to walk far enough to be out of sight of his mom. After that it was just a matter of time. I came in here to ask if anyone besides me Googled this guys name after reading the article. It’s the first thing I did after read the article because I wanted to see if his pictures fit the profile. I wasn’t disappointed [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-only-there-had-been-a-comma-man-killed-by-alligator/724406.md?page=4)