# If Real Life Worked Like A Role Playing Game **URL:** \ **Category:** The Game Room\ **Created:** [October 21, 2012, 2:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-real-life-worked-like-a-role-playing-game/638418 "2012-10-21T14:39:35Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Lumpy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lumpy/32/446_2.png) [@Lumpy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lumpy)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2012, 2:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-real-life-worked-like-a-role-playing-game/638418/1 "2012-10-21T14:39:35Z")
On [Cracked.com](http://Cracked.com). Several of them were funny but this one made me LOL: [noparse][http://i.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/photoshop/6/6/8/59668\_slide.jpg?v=1[/noparse]](http://i.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/photoshop/6/6/8/59668_slide.jpg?v=1%5B/noparse%5D) Although I didn’t get two of them: The bathroom filled with cobwebs, and the tank column blocked by a large ice cube ---
**Author:** ![Jophiel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jophiel/32/66_2.png) [@Jophiel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jophiel)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2012, 2:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-real-life-worked-like-a-role-playing-game/638418/2 "2012-10-21T14:54:38Z")
[Article View](http://www.cracked.com/photoplasty_204_if-real-life-worked-like-role-playing-game/?view=article) for people who want to look at all the entries without the annoying slideshow aspect. In a rare instance, I agree with #1 being #1. Ice cube I assume is just him using some magical ice shield to protect him from the tanks. Dunno about the cobwebs unless there’s some trope of just throwing cobwebs into an otherwise clean environment to depict age. ---
**Author:** ![One\_And\_Only\_Wanderers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/838e76/32.png) [@One\_And\_Only\_Wanderers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/One_And_Only_Wanderers)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2012, 2:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-real-life-worked-like-a-role-playing-game/638418/3 "2012-10-21T14:59:39Z")
no one goes to the bathroom in role playing games, so it scovered in cobwebs etc ---
**Author:** ![Bill\_Door](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/50afbb/32.png) [@Bill\_Door](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bill_Door)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2012, 3:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-real-life-worked-like-a-role-playing-game/638418/4 "2012-10-21T15:04:50Z")
My guess on the cobwebs in the bathroom is they’re showing that no one in an RPG ever needs to take a dump. I don’t think that’s true however, I remember that in on of the Half-Life games you could pick up a couple of health points by using a toilet. ---
**Author:** ![Der\_Trihs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/der_trihs/32/233_2.png) [@Der\_Trihs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Der_Trihs)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2012, 3:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-real-life-worked-like-a-role-playing-game/638418/5 "2012-10-21T15:08:19Z")
I did especially like “the State holds a +9 in Incarceration”. > [@Bill\_Door](#): > > My guess on the cobwebs in the bathroom is they’re showing that no one in an RPG ever needs to take a dump. I don’t think that’s true however, I remember that in on of the Half-Life games you could pick up a couple of health points by using a toilet. Using a toilet can also heal you a bit in Fallout III as I recall; in Vault 101 at least. Elsewhere you get radiation. ---
**Author:** ![wolfman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/a8b319/32.png) [@wolfman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wolfman)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2012, 3:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-real-life-worked-like-a-role-playing-game/638418/6 "2012-10-21T15:29:01Z")
> [@Der\_Trihs](#): > > I did especially like “the State holds a +9 in Incarceration”. > > Using a toilet can also heal you a bit in Fallout III as I recall; in Vault 101 at least. Elsewhere you get radiation. Yeah, but you’re not “using” it. you’re drinking from it. just a water source, and food and drink heal, and radiate. ---
**Author:** ![Jophiel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jophiel/32/66_2.png) [@Jophiel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jophiel)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2012, 3:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-real-life-worked-like-a-role-playing-game/638418/7 "2012-10-21T15:29:50Z")
> [@One\_And\_Only\_Wanderers](#): > > no one goes to the bathroom in role playing games, so it scovered in cobwebs etc Ah, I guess the fact that it was otherwise pristine (aside from some MS Paint webbing) made that go past me. I thought the joke was in the juxtaposition of the clean/webs and not just the disuse. In other words, I thought about it too hard. ---
**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2012, 5:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-real-life-worked-like-a-role-playing-game/638418/8 "2012-10-21T17:15:43Z")
“Just remember, whenever you attempt anything, you always have a 1 in 20 chance to succeed fantastically or fail horribly.” ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2012, 6:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-real-life-worked-like-a-role-playing-game/638418/9 "2012-10-21T18:29:17Z")
> [@Jophiel](#): > > Ah, I guess the fact that it was otherwise pristine (aside from some MS Paint webbing) made that go past me. I thought the joke was in the juxtaposition of the clean/webs and not just the disuse. > > In other words, I thought about it too hard. In your defense, the picture was so crappy, it was easier to get the joke from your description of it, than by actually looking at the picture. ---
**Author:** ![Simplicio](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c37758/32.png) [@Simplicio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Simplicio)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2012, 8:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-real-life-worked-like-a-role-playing-game/638418/10 "2012-10-21T20:48:03Z")
That was pretty good. Usually those lists are one or two funny ideas and then twenty other entries of filler. But that one was pretty good throughout. (still not sure I get tank guy being a block of ice though) ---
**Author:** ![kidchameleon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/898d66/32.png) [@kidchameleon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kidchameleon)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2012, 9:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-real-life-worked-like-a-role-playing-game/638418/11 "2012-10-21T21:14:39Z")
Is that a Gelatinous Cube? ---
**Author:** ![Jragon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e19b73/32.png) [@Jragon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jragon)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2012, 9:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-real-life-worked-like-a-role-playing-game/638418/12 "2012-10-21T21:22:20Z")
I think it’s a reference to the spell Ice Block in World of Warcraft, which immobilizes the caster and prevents him from casting spells, but makes him impervious to oncoming damage. In other words, he was blocking the tanks but making it so they couldn’t hurt him. ---
**Author:** ![Arrogance\_Ex\_Machina](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/arrogance_ex_machina/32/192_2.png) [@Arrogance\_Ex\_Machina](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Arrogance_Ex_Machina)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2012, 9:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-real-life-worked-like-a-role-playing-game/638418/13 "2012-10-21T21:56:48Z")
> [@Jragon](#): > > I think it’s a reference to the spell Ice Block in World of Warcraft, which immobilizes the caster and prevents him from casting spells, but makes him impervious to oncoming damage. In other words, he was blocking the tanks but making it so they couldn’t hurt him. I was wondering if that was it as well, but if he had just used the Ice Block graphics from WoW it would’ve been instantly recognizable (well, at least to any WoW player) - now you can’t tell if it is a gelatinous cube or an ice cube or what. ---
**Author:** ![Drain\_Bead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e47774/32.png) [@Drain\_Bead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Drain_Bead)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2012, 11:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-real-life-worked-like-a-role-playing-game/638418/14 "2012-10-21T23:04:33Z")
What was with the Starbucks one? I was looking at it on a tiny screen on my phone and totally didn’t get it. ---
**Author:** ![Jragon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e19b73/32.png) [@Jragon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jragon)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2012, 11:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-real-life-worked-like-a-role-playing-game/638418/15 "2012-10-21T23:23:34Z")
> [@Drain\_Bead](#): > > What was with the Starbucks one? I was looking at it on a tiny screen on my phone and totally didn’t get it. On the menu it has a section for “Potions”, with stuff like “Holy Protection” under it. ---
**Author:** ![Ferret\_Herder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e47774/32.png) [@Ferret\_Herder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ferret_Herder)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2012, 11:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-real-life-worked-like-a-role-playing-game/638418/16 "2012-10-21T23:44:35Z")
> [@Jragon](#): > > On the menu it has a section for “Potions”, with stuff like “Holy Protection” under it. The logo also has “Starbucks: Coffee Tea Potions” on it. ---
**Author:** ![Der\_Trihs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/der_trihs/32/233_2.png) [@Der\_Trihs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Der_Trihs)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2012, 11:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-real-life-worked-like-a-role-playing-game/638418/17 "2012-10-21T23:48:10Z")
> [@kidchameleon](#): > > Is that a Gelatinous Cube? > [@Arrogance\_Ex\_Machina](#): > > I was wondering if that was it as well, but if he had just used the Ice Block graphics from WoW it would’ve been instantly recognizable (well, at least to any WoW player) - now you can’t tell if it is a gelatinous cube or an ice cube or what. “Gelatinous Cube” was my first thought. I think that picture fails because it’s too game-specific; I’ve never played WoW, so had no way to recognize the reference. ---
**Author:** ![Broomstick](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/broomstick/32/246_2.png) [@Broomstick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Broomstick)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2012, 12:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-real-life-worked-like-a-role-playing-game/638418/18 "2012-10-22T00:03:52Z")
I’ve been playing WoW since about 6 months after it came out and I didn’t get the reference until it was explained here. Well, I might have, eventually, but it didn’t jump out at me. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_Angel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/d26b3c/32.png) [@Johnny\_Angel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_Angel)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2012, 5:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-real-life-worked-like-a-role-playing-game/638418/19 "2012-10-22T05:13:36Z")
> [@Der\_Trihs](#): > > “Gelatinous Cube” was my first thought. I think that picture fails because it’s too game-specific; I’ve never played WoW, so had no way to recognize the reference. They should have made an Otiluke’s Resiliant Sphere. ---
**Author:** ![Telperion](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/telperion/32/509_2.png) [@Telperion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Telperion)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2012, 10:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-real-life-worked-like-a-role-playing-game/638418/20 "2012-10-22T10:53:07Z")
Bicycle helmet: $50 Motorcycle helmet: $500 Football helmet: $5,000 Riot police helmet: $50,000 [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-real-life-worked-like-a-role-playing-game/638418.md?page=2)