# If the USS Enterprise had been an actual military vessel... **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [July 7, 2015, 3:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-the-uss-enterprise-had-been-an-actual-military-vessel/724479 "2015-07-07T15:02:22Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2015, 2:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-the-uss-enterprise-had-been-an-actual-military-vessel/724479/61 "2015-07-08T02:17:43Z")
> [@Diceman](#): > > Seriously, wasn’t sodomy punishable by death in the Royal Navy, basically for this exact reason? Yeah, just try enforcing _that_ rule! :smack: ---
**Author:** ![Lumpy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lumpy/32/446_2.png) [@Lumpy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lumpy)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2015, 2:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-the-uss-enterprise-had-been-an-actual-military-vessel/724479/62 "2015-07-08T02:19:59Z")
> [@terentii](#): > > What about Master Bates? :dubious: And the first mate… Oh what the heck, let’s invite the whole Semen’s Flotilla aboard: Captain Hooker, Whore-ratio Hornyblower, “Long John” Silver, “Poopdeck” Pappy, and Moby Dick the Sperm Whale. ---
**Author:** ![tonyfop](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/85f322/32.png) [@tonyfop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tonyfop)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2015, 2:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-the-uss-enterprise-had-been-an-actual-military-vessel/724479/63 "2015-07-08T02:41:37Z")
Actually, to expound on my statement, since it did come off as snarky, the bridge team on a warship is made up of enlisted crew members, and one officer, the OOD. The captain doesn’t spend his whole day on the bridge. He(or she) has an office nearby, and checks in, but he(or she) lets everyone else do the jobs they were trained for. I believe that the TOS Enterprise crew complement falls somewhere in the 300’s. That is similar to a Navy Ticonderoga class Cruiser, which has a complement of 30 Officers and 300 Enlisted. I see no reason why a future outer space warship wouldn’t keep the same ratio. ---
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2015, 2:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-the-uss-enterprise-had-been-an-actual-military-vessel/724479/64 "2015-07-08T02:47:51Z")
> [@tonyfop](#): > > I believe that the TOS Enterprise crew complement falls somewhere in the 300’s. That is similar to a Navy Ticonderoga class Cruiser, which has a complement of 30 Officers and 300 Enlisted. I see no reason why a future outer space warship wouldn’t keep the same ratio. Four hundred and thirty, actually, one-third of which was female. But yeah, your point is well taken! ---
**Author:** ![burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/burpo_the_wonder_mutt/32/365_2.png) [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2015, 3:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-the-uss-enterprise-had-been-an-actual-military-vessel/724479/65 "2015-07-08T03:00:08Z")
> [@Lumpy](#): > > And the first mate… > > Oh what the heck, let’s invite the whole Semen’s Flotilla aboard: Captain Hooker, Whore-ratio Hornyblower, “Long John” Silver, “Poopdeck” Pappy, and Moby Dick the Sperm Whale. Smithers: I think women and seamen don’t mix. Burns: We know what you think. ---
**Author:** ![Voyager](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/voyager/32/133_2.png) [@Voyager](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Voyager)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2015, 10:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-the-uss-enterprise-had-been-an-actual-military-vessel/724479/66 "2015-07-08T22:50:33Z")
> [@Hail\_Ants](#): > > To be fair, in the original Shatner series (and the prequel series _Star Trek: Enterprise_) there were no families on board. That was only in \*TNG \* where it represented Roddenberry’s hope for an even more peaceful, civilian future (IOW when it kinda became _The Love Boat_ even including oh-so progressive [skirts for men!!](http://en.memory-alpha.wikia.com/wiki/Starfleet_uniform_%282350s-2370s%29#Skant)) 😃 > > Also in\* TOS \*I think Sulu _et al._ usually did repeat commands. > > Top officers leaving on landing party/away missions was just an unavoidable storytelling device… Plus whenever anything nasty got close, the shields would snap on automatically. A feature Picard probably overrode so as to not hurt the feelings of whatever they met. ---
**Author:** ![yellowjacketcoder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/4bbf92/32.png) [@yellowjacketcoder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/yellowjacketcoder)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2015, 11:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-the-uss-enterprise-had-been-an-actual-military-vessel/724479/67 "2015-07-08T23:57:14Z")
> [@Tamerlane](#): > > I think _you_ mean at least [twenty-three times over](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/HMS_Enterprise) including British warships ;). I mean no such thing at all. Those were _HMS_ Enterprise. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![D\_Odds](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/d_odds/32/2882_2.png) [@D\_Odds](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/D_Odds)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2015, 12:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-the-uss-enterprise-had-been-an-actual-military-vessel/724479/68 "2015-07-09T00:10:11Z")
> [@ElvisL1ves](#): > > The original Galactica didn’t do shit to defend itself until the Cylons were within _microns_. To the Galactica crew I would say, “_You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means._” ---
**Author:** ![msmith537](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d9b06d/32.png) [@msmith537](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/msmith537)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2015, 12:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-the-uss-enterprise-had-been-an-actual-military-vessel/724479/69 "2015-07-09T00:25:52Z")
> [@ElvisL1ves](#): > > The original Galactica didn’t do shit to defend itself until the Cylons were within _microns_. Why do you think the Colonial Fleet was destroyed? “All ships! Fire all batteries when the Cylons are within 30 microns!” “Sir…don’t you mean macrons?” “What?! SHIT!! A\*##…” ---
**Author:** ![msmith537](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d9b06d/32.png) [@msmith537](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/msmith537)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2015, 1:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-the-uss-enterprise-had-been-an-actual-military-vessel/724479/70 "2015-07-09T01:24:27Z")
> [@tonyfop](#): > > I believe that the TOS Enterprise crew complement falls somewhere in the 300’s. That is similar to a Navy Ticonderoga class Cruiser, which has a complement of 30 Officers and 300 Enlisted. I see no reason why a future outer space warship wouldn’t keep the same ratio. I suppose the same reason an aircraft doesn’t have a lot of enlisted personnel. A mostly automated starship doesn’t need a lot of deck monkeys. They would mostly be highly trained technicians and specialists. ---
**Author:** ![Lumpy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lumpy/32/446_2.png) [@Lumpy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lumpy)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2015, 2:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-the-uss-enterprise-had-been-an-actual-military-vessel/724479/71 "2015-07-09T02:14:19Z")
> [@msmith537](#): > > I suppose the same reason an aircraft doesn’t have a lot of enlisted personnel. A mostly automated starship doesn’t need a lot of deck monkeys. They would mostly be highly trained technicians and specialists. According to Memory Alpha, there are “crewmen” who are neither non-coms nor officers. Maybe they’re those guys you occasionally see in one-piece jump suits instead of the usual red and black. ---
**Author:** ![GusNSpot](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gusnspot/32/436_2.png) [@GusNSpot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GusNSpot)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2015, 5:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-the-uss-enterprise-had-been-an-actual-military-vessel/724479/72 "2015-07-09T05:33:58Z")
> [@Xema](#): > > Nitpick: She was - [twice](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/USS_Enterprise_%28CV-6%29) [over](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/USS_Enterprise_%28CVN-65%29). My Mom’s oldest brother was killed flying off the USS Enterprise (CV-6) at the start of the War in the Pacific. ---
**Author:** ![Leaffan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leaffan/32/299_2.png) [@Leaffan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leaffan)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2015, 5:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-the-uss-enterprise-had-been-an-actual-military-vessel/724479/73 "2015-07-09T05:53:27Z")
> [@Voyager](#): > > Plus whenever anything nasty got close, the shields would snap on automatically. A feature Picard probably overrode so as to not hurt the feelings of whatever they met. The shields didn’t snap on automatically since transporter beams could not be used with the shields on. Jeesh! ---
**Author:** ![Nonsuch](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/nonsuch/32/2922_2.png) [@Nonsuch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nonsuch)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2015, 3:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-the-uss-enterprise-had-been-an-actual-military-vessel/724479/74 "2015-07-09T15:27:07Z")
> [@Lumpy](#): > > According to Memory Alpha, there are “crewmen” who are neither non-coms nor officers. Maybe they’re those guys you occasionally see in one-piece jump suits instead of the usual red and black. Simon Tarses, the half-Vulcan, half-Romulan in “The Drumhead,” was one. He told Captain Picard he enlisted in Starfleet directly without enrolling in the Academy, so he can’t become an officer. ---
**Author:** ![Ethilrist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ethilrist/32/4604_2.png) [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2015, 3:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-the-uss-enterprise-had-been-an-actual-military-vessel/724479/75 "2015-07-09T15:31:43Z")
> [@Nonsuch](#): > > Simon Tarses, the half-Vulcan, half-Romulan in “The Drumhead,” was one. He told Captain Picard he enlisted in Starfleet directly without enrolling in the Academy, so he can’t become an officer. That’s odd, seeing as how Picard promoted Wesley directly to Ensign in recognition of his performance of duties while Acting Ensign… ---
**Author:** ![G0sp3l](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/c68b51/32.png) [@G0sp3l](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/G0sp3l)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2015, 3:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-the-uss-enterprise-had-been-an-actual-military-vessel/724479/76 "2015-07-09T15:42:43Z")
There wouldn’t be enough elbow room to swing a dead cat, let alone go strolling down a corridor four abreast like they’re off to see the wizard. ---
**Author:** ![Sitnam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Sitnam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sitnam)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2015, 4:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-the-uss-enterprise-had-been-an-actual-military-vessel/724479/77 "2015-07-09T16:06:29Z")
> [@ElvisL1ves](#): > > “The traditions of the Royal Navy are three in number: Rum, sodomy and the lash.” - Churchill Says a cavalry man, I don’t even want to know what the traditions were in his outfit. ---
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2015, 4:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-the-uss-enterprise-had-been-an-actual-military-vessel/724479/78 "2015-07-09T16:13:52Z")
> [@Ethilrist](#): > > That’s odd, seeing as how Picard promoted Wesley directly to Ensign in recognition of his performance of duties while Acting Ensign… Yeah, it definitely helps if you have connections. :mad: ---
**Author:** ![burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/burpo_the_wonder_mutt/32/365_2.png) [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2015, 4:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-the-uss-enterprise-had-been-an-actual-military-vessel/724479/79 "2015-07-09T16:22:25Z")
> [@Sitnam](#): > > Says a cavalry man, I don’t even want to know what the traditions were in his outfit. “Usually we ride them into town.” 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Jim\_s\_Son](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e19adc/32.png) [@Jim\_s\_Son](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jim_s_Son)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2015, 6:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-the-uss-enterprise-had-been-an-actual-military-vessel/724479/80 "2015-07-09T18:58:14Z")
> [@Nars\_Glinley](#): > > There wouldn’t have been whole families on board. > > The helmsman would repeat navigation changes. > > The high ranking officers wouldn’t leave on “away missions”. Are away missions even a real thing? > > Please continue. Is there any record as to how often Navy captains in the Age of Discovery were on away missions? Both Ferdinand Magellan and James Cook were killed in clashes with natives. From what I remember about William Bligh’s mission to Tahiti to get breadfruit trees so Great Britain would have a cheap source of food for its Caribbean slaves (ultimately the slaves refused to eat it), he didn’t ask the chieftains for breadfruit. He gave them gifts from King George III and when the Tahitians mentioned several reciprocal gifts, told them breadfruit was a good idea. Seems to me he was directly negotiating a deal. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-the-uss-enterprise-had-been-an-actual-military-vessel/724479.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-the-uss-enterprise-had-been-an-actual-military-vessel/724479.md?page=5)