# If there's one thing I hate it's a dead Mexican Muslim litterbug, or I covet Sylvia Allen (R-AZ) **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [May 5, 2010, 9:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-theres-one-thing-i-hate-its-a-dead-mexican-muslim-litterbug-or-i-covet-sylvia-allen-r-az/538447 "2010-05-05T21:25:16Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 15\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![The\_Tao\_s\_Revenge](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/73ab20/32.png) [@The\_Tao\_s\_Revenge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Tao_s_Revenge)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2010, 2:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-theres-one-thing-i-hate-its-a-dead-mexican-muslim-litterbug-or-i-covet-sylvia-allen-r-az/538447/61 "2010-05-07T02:01:03Z")
> [@Sampiro](#): > > I wonder if those 300 to 1200 Mexicans that one guy sees everyday are the same Mexicans. Since Mexicans are Muslims and Muslims and Jews are connected, maybe it’s like the Israelites having to walk in circles and trapezoids through a desert for 40 years- this is some tribe that has to wander his land before they can enter the promised land of central Arizona. > > If not, then conservatively 100,000 people come across his property every year. If he were to install a turnstyle like they have on subways and charge $1 per head, he’d have a six figure income. Well the Aztec [Tenochtitlan](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tenochtitlan#History) was said to be founded by a tribe wondering about until they saw an eagle eating a snake on top of cactus. Maybe some of the Aztec didn’t get the memo back then and their decedents are still wondering about. Maybe if he goes out and tells them about Mexico city they’ll say “praise be to Allah” and go visit it. ---
**Author:** ![elelle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/f0a364/32.png) [@elelle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elelle)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2010, 2:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-theres-one-thing-i-hate-its-a-dead-mexican-muslim-litterbug-or-i-covet-sylvia-allen-r-az/538447/62 "2010-05-07T02:10:50Z")
OK, so here’s my solution: All them Mexicans with their Koran Bibbles and all rever many different types of gods than white ones, like this one [Santo](http://www.saint.org/images/blogger/rudolfo-guzman-el-santo-wrestler-745738.jpg). [Here’s some](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Santo) background. Them Mexicans love and respect Santo, so why not have a super special US border patrol dressed in Santo masks, patrolling and demanding respect and papers. It’d be a cincho. Nobody would mess with El Santo, right? ---
**Author:** ![SecretaryofEvil](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e95f7d/32.png) [@SecretaryofEvil](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SecretaryofEvil)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2010, 2:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-theres-one-thing-i-hate-its-a-dead-mexican-muslim-litterbug-or-i-covet-sylvia-allen-r-az/538447/63 "2010-05-07T02:19:02Z")
If they’re leaving their Korans at the border, doesn’t this mean the secularists are winning? The liberal media and their atheist agenda are so effective that Muslims discard their religion as soon as they step foot over the border. The issue she’s angry about isn’t that Muslims are sneaking into the country, it’s that people are being deceived into giving up their religion because it’s not legal to imprison adults for consenting homosexual activity. ---
**Author:** ![Sampiro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sampiro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sampiro)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2010, 2:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-theres-one-thing-i-hate-its-a-dead-mexican-muslim-litterbug-or-i-covet-sylvia-allen-r-az/538447/64 "2010-05-07T02:34:15Z")
> [@The\_Tao\_s\_Revenge](#): > > Well the Aztec [Tenochtitlan](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tenochtitlan#History) was said to be founded by a tribe wondering about until they saw an eagle eating a snake on top of cactus. > > Maybe some of the Aztec didn’t get the memo back then and their decedents are still wondering about. Maybe if he goes out and tells them about Mexico city they’ll say “praise be to Allah” and go visit it. Maybe it’s like the Jewish-Christian division over the Messiah: the ones on his property were waiting for an eagle, but not that eagle. They’ll know the eagle is the right one when they see him. ---
**Author:** ![Shot\_From\_Guns](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ccd318/32.png) [@Shot\_From\_Guns](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shot_From_Guns)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2010, 3:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-theres-one-thing-i-hate-its-a-dead-mexican-muslim-litterbug-or-i-covet-sylvia-allen-r-az/538447/65 "2010-05-07T15:30:01Z")
> [@Sampiro](#): > > I wonder if those 300 to 1200 Mexicans that one guy sees everyday are the same Mexicans. No way to tell without marking them somehow. Those people all look alike. Maybe when we [chip them](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=561355), we could also give them identifying tattoos? Perhaps with their chip serial numbers? Inside the forearm should be a convenient spot. ---
**Author:** ![Unauthorized\_Cinnamon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/bc8723/32.png) [@Unauthorized\_Cinnamon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Unauthorized_Cinnamon)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2010, 12:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-theres-one-thing-i-hate-its-a-dead-mexican-muslim-litterbug-or-i-covet-sylvia-allen-r-az/538447/66 "2010-05-08T00:06:35Z")
> [@Sampiro](#): > > If not, then conservatively 100,000 people come across his property every year. If he were to install a turnstyle like they have on subways and charge $1 per head, he’d have a six figure income. [Somebody’s gotta go back and get a shitload of dimes!](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SbWg-mozGsU) ---
**Author:** ![jayjay](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jayjay/32/6765_2.png) [@jayjay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jayjay)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2010, 4:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-theres-one-thing-i-hate-its-a-dead-mexican-muslim-litterbug-or-i-covet-sylvia-allen-r-az/538447/67 "2010-05-08T04:10:42Z")
> [@Tapioca\_Dextrin](#): > > They’re packing artillery? Really, really thin artillery. ---
**Author:** ![NinjaChick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/71c47a/32.png) [@NinjaChick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NinjaChick)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2010, 5:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-theres-one-thing-i-hate-its-a-dead-mexican-muslim-litterbug-or-i-covet-sylvia-allen-r-az/538447/68 "2010-05-08T05:25:12Z")
> [@](#): > > One Rancher testified that 300 to 1200 people a DAY come across his ranch vandalizing his property, stealing his vehicles and property, cutting down his fences, and leaving trash. In the last two years he has found 17 dead bodies and two Koran bibles. Well, _obviously_ the worst part about this is finding a Koran bible not just once but _twice_. But, uh, assuming the illegals take a standard two weeks of vacation time, and politely limit themselves to 300 people per day, and we discount the average 8.5 guys who die on his property per year, then he’s got at least an average of 105,391 (and a half) illegals crossing his property per year. Which, uh, strikes me as possibly not strictly and entirely true, because that’s actually a fairly large number. Then again, I also have to question the competency of whatever police jurisdiction(s) who are called out eight or nine times a year to collect dead bodies from one property but don’t see that as worth investigating, so, y’know, whatever. And I bet those koran bibles are pretty distracting, what with the sulfur and thick smoke and disembodied evil cackling. > [@](#): > > We have already lost our language, everything must be printed in Spanish. We have already lost our history, it is no longer taught in our schools, and we have lost our borders. Ah, yes, those things where we don’t speak English anymore, and we, uh, don’t teach history in our schools, and just went ahead and assimilated Mexico (and apparently all those other Latin American countries like Canada) and no longer have any borders. All because of the 105,391.5+ illegal immigrants per year and their koran bibles. ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2010, 2:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-theres-one-thing-i-hate-its-a-dead-mexican-muslim-litterbug-or-i-covet-sylvia-allen-r-az/538447/69 "2010-05-08T14:07:09Z")
> [@](#): > > we have lost our borders Do the math. 34,096,000 Canadians. 111,212,000 Mexicans. 309,218,000 Americans. If the borders have disappeared it’s not Americans who have a problem. ---
**Author:** ![Kobal2](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kobal2/32/20_2.png) [@Kobal2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kobal2)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2010, 12:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-theres-one-thing-i-hate-its-a-dead-mexican-muslim-litterbug-or-i-covet-sylvia-allen-r-az/538447/70 "2010-05-09T00:16:40Z")
> [@Sampiro](#): > > I wonder if those 300 to 1200 Mexicans that one guy sees everyday are the same Mexicans. Actually, the guy’s just hosting the Mexican Ozzfest once a year. On that one day, half a million dudes show up and tear the place up. But _on average_ that’s 1200 Mexicans a day over the entire year ! ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2010, 1:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-theres-one-thing-i-hate-its-a-dead-mexican-muslim-litterbug-or-i-covet-sylvia-allen-r-az/538447/71 "2010-05-09T01:12:38Z")
> [@Kyla](#): > > Note to self: never vote for anyone who either a. can’t use apostrophes correctly or b. can’t at least get someone on staff who can use apostrophes correctly to proofread their screeds. Seriously, this woman is an elected official? After James Inhofe and Sarah Palin and Michelle Bachmann, does anything surprise you in this regard? ---
**Author:** ![Sampiro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sampiro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sampiro)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2010, 5:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-theres-one-thing-i-hate-its-a-dead-mexican-muslim-litterbug-or-i-covet-sylvia-allen-r-az/538447/72 "2010-05-09T05:48:44Z")
Alabama’s gubernatorial race includes a man named Tim James, best known as the son of our former governor Fob James (who served once as a Democrat and once as a Republican) who in turn is best known as the governor who walked around a stage acting like a chimp to protest the teaching of evolution in public schools. The biggest issues James has addressed so far are the fact Alabama offers drivers license exams in languages other than English, the fact his Republican opponent (James is Republican) was once a Democrat (like Tim’s father) and once said teaching evolution should be taught in public schools and that parts of the Bible should be taken literally, and that if he’s elected he’ll require sex offenders to go register in person every 90 days “in spite of some liberals saying it inconveniences them”. (No asswipe, it’s not that anybody minds inconveniencing sex offenders so much as a] it’s a completely unnecessary noserubbing and b] it inconveniences state workers who have to process them every 90 days for pointless re-registration when nothing has changed in their status.) So I’m serving warning Arizona: you might feel you’re in the catbird’s seat now, but come November Tim James may well restore us to our former glory as the most talked about and popular state in the nation with The Daily Show and Colbert Report! We’ll see your Sylvia Allen and raise you a 2nd generation chimpersonator! (Just for Magnolias and Melodrama value I’ll share some quite true and verified info: Tim’s uncle Bob [Fob’s lookalike brother] is a queerer-than-a-4-legged-French-speaking-duck uncle who lives in Auburn because he likes the “BPQ” [boy pussy quotient] and manages the family sporting goods empire.) ---
**Author:** ![digs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/digs/32/14889_2.png) [@digs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/digs)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2010, 2:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-theres-one-thing-i-hate-its-a-dead-mexican-muslim-litterbug-or-i-covet-sylvia-allen-r-az/538447/73 "2010-05-10T02:06:59Z")
> [@Sampiro](#): > > I only know it from the postcard I got that read > > Regards, > Sudan I got a postcard like that, and immediately assumed that Sudan was a douche. ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2010, 2:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-theres-one-thing-i-hate-its-a-dead-mexican-muslim-litterbug-or-i-covet-sylvia-allen-r-az/538447/74 "2010-05-10T02:39:23Z")
> [@digs](#): > > I got a postcard like that, and immediately assumed that Sudan was a douche. Why? Sudan is a desert. Or was that dessert? I forget. ---
**Author:** ![digs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/digs/32/14889_2.png) [@digs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/digs)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2010, 3:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-theres-one-thing-i-hate-its-a-dead-mexican-muslim-litterbug-or-i-covet-sylvia-allen-r-az/538447/75 "2010-05-10T03:28:36Z")
> [@](#): > > Sudan is a dessert. > Sudan is a douche. > It’s. A. Dessert. > No! It’s a douche! Oh, come on, you two, and stop your fighting… it’s both! > [@](#): > > Both? Sure, it’s totally new – the first tasty strawberrylicious dessert that’s ALSO effective as a douche! > [@](#): > > Golly! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-theres-one-thing-i-hate-its-a-dead-mexican-muslim-litterbug-or-i-covet-sylvia-allen-r-az/538447.md?page=3)