# If you can cook you know that.... **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [October 29, 2012, 10:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-can-cook-you-know-that/639268 "2012-10-29T22:25:48Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![pulykamell](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pulykamell/32/3166_2.png) [@pulykamell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pulykamell)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 2012, 7:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-can-cook-you-know-that/639268/61 "2012-10-30T19:57:11Z")
> [@amijane](#): > > And if you _really_ want flaky and are handling the pastry more than usual, repeatedly folding and rolling out, then refrigerate between folds to keep it cold so you don’t lose the integrity of your layers. Yes, that’s the key to making puff pastry. I’ve never done it myself, but I did work in a kitchen where they made their own, and between folds, they would stick the dough in the walk-in freezer (or maybe it was just a walk-in fridge–this was 15 years ago) for about a half-hour before making the next set of folds. ---
**Author:** ![TruCelt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/trucelt/32/523_2.png) [@TruCelt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TruCelt)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 2012, 7:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-can-cook-you-know-that/639268/62 "2012-10-30T19:58:59Z")
> [@Dogzilla](#): > > Okay, pie crust advisors. This is my plan. Please suggest tweaks, as I will be making a pie for the Thanksgiving luncheon at work soon. It will be a pumpkin pie with crushed pecans\* folded into the crust, and some sort of broken pecans tossed on top. > > 1. Use my metal or a glass bowl and freeze that fucker before I do anything else. > 2. Chill my Crisco (use something else, or is that best for pie crust?) in the fridge while the bowl is freezing. > 2a. Do a shot of ice-cold vanilla vodka. Use another couple shots in my pie dough instead of water.\*\* > 3. Using my pastry cutter (and NOT my warm hands), cut the Crisco into the flour and then put the bowl back in the fridge. > 4. A while later, remove bowl from fridge, roll out crust, quick like a bunny. > 5. Slap crust into pie pan quick like a bunny, poke holes in bottom, put back into fridge until guts of pie are ready. > 6. Remove cold crust from fridge, pour pie guts in, slap in oven before crust knows what hit it. > > How am I doing? It’s the simplest damn thing, and my pies turn out delicious, but I cannot get that flaky crust that Loretta Lynn was always going on about in the Crisco commercials. Nor does my crust _look_ like the one on the Crisco container. > > - I toss a half cup or so of pecans into a ziploc baggie and then roll it out to crush all the pecans to fine pecan dust. These pecans will be toasted first to add some depth to the nutty flavor that ends up in the crust. > > \*\* I cannot WAIT to try this part. If you want to make it really extraordinary, I wouldn’t recommend Crisco for pie crust. I like to use Irish or bakery butter. (Ask at the bakery counter in your local gocery store.) Basically these types have less water in them than the standard Land O’Lakes stuff. Freeze the butter and then put it in the mandoline and slice very thin. Place the pieces individually into the bowl and then fluff with flour so they don’t stick to each other. This way as you fold and roll it out the butter will stretch thin into tiny sheets between the flour bits without truly combining. And that’s where flakes come from. ---
**Author:** ![pulykamell](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pulykamell/32/3166_2.png) [@pulykamell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pulykamell)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 2012, 8:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-can-cook-you-know-that/639268/63 "2012-10-30T20:04:18Z")
> [@Dogzilla](#): > > Okay, pie crust advisors. This is my plan. Please suggest tweaks, as I will be making a pie for the Thanksgiving luncheon at work soon. It will be a pumpkin pie with crushed pecans\* folded into the crust, and some sort of broken pecans tossed on top. > > 1. Use my metal or a glass bowl and freeze that fucker before I do anything else. > 2. Chill my Crisco (use something else, or is that best for pie crust?) in the fridge while the bowl is freezing. > 2a. Do a shot of ice-cold vanilla vodka. Use another couple shots in my pie dough instead of water.\*\* > 3. Using my pastry cutter (and NOT my warm hands), cut the Crisco into the flour and then put the bowl back in the fridge. > 4. A while later, remove bowl from fridge, roll out crust, quick like a bunny. > 5. Slap crust into pie pan quick like a bunny, poke holes in bottom, put back into fridge until guts of pie are ready. > 6. Remove cold crust from fridge, pour pie guts in, slap in oven before crust knows what hit it. > > How am I doing? It’s the simplest damn thing, and my pies turn out delicious, but I cannot get that flaky crust that Loretta Lynn was always going on about in the Crisco commercials. Nor does my crust _look_ like the one on the Crisco container. > > - I toss a half cup or so of pecans into a ziploc baggie and then roll it out to crush all the pecans to fine pecan dust. These pecans will be toasted first to add some depth to the nutty flavor that ends up in the crust. > > \*\* I cannot WAIT to try this part. You don’t have to be quite that fussy about it. I follow [this recipe](http://www.seriouseats.com/recipes/2007/11/cooks-illustrated-foolproof-pie-dough-recipe.html) on the very rare occasion I make pie dough. Works fine, but it uses a mix of butter and shortening. But if you’re just using your own recipe, start out with cold stuff, mix together until you get pea-like crumbles, use 1/2 vodka and 1/2 water for your liquid. Basically, you’re looking to create a dough that is lumpy and just begins to stick to itself. Those little pea-sized lumps of Crisco is what is creating the flakiness in your dough. It’s kinda like those pockets of fat create little spaces between the layers that give it flake. If you overmix or let the fat melt, you don’t have those pockets that will make the crust flake up properly. Me? I just usually cheat and do a simple crushed cookie or cracker crust. I’m lazy. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![scootergirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e99b99/32.png) [@scootergirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scootergirl)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 2012, 8:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-can-cook-you-know-that/639268/64 "2012-10-30T20:05:33Z")
When it comes to hummus, there **is** such a thing as too much garlic. Of course it is a matter of taste, but I have made hummus in which the raw garlic was the prominent flavor and I didn’t enjoy it nearly as much as batches in which the flavors are a culmination of everything. By the way if you have a food processor there is no reason not to make your own. I add chipotle powder to mine sometimes. ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 2012, 8:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-can-cook-you-know-that/639268/65 "2012-10-30T20:09:53Z")
> [@Dogzilla](#): > > Okay, pie crust advisors. This is my plan. Please suggest tweaks, as I will be making a pie for the Thanksgiving luncheon at work soon. It will be a pumpkin pie with crushed pecans\* folded into the crust, and some sort of broken pecans tossed on top. > > 1. Use my metal or a glass bowl and freeze that fucker before I do anything else. > 2. Chill my Crisco (use something else, or is that best for pie crust?) in the fridge while the bowl is freezing. > 2a. Do a shot of ice-cold vanilla vodka. Use another couple shots in my pie dough instead of water.\*\* > 3. Using my pastry cutter (and NOT my warm hands), cut the Crisco into the flour and then put the bowl back in the fridge. > 4. A while later, remove bowl from fridge, roll out crust, quick like a bunny. > 5. Slap crust into pie pan quick like a bunny, poke holes in bottom, put back into fridge until guts of pie are ready. > 6. Remove cold crust from fridge, pour pie guts in, slap in oven before crust knows what hit it. > > How am I doing? It’s the simplest damn thing, and my pies turn out delicious, but I cannot get that flaky crust that Loretta Lynn was always going on about in the Crisco commercials. Nor does my crust _look_ like the one on the Crisco container. > > - I toss a half cup or so of pecans into a ziploc baggie and then roll it out to crush all the pecans to fine pecan dust. These pecans will be toasted first to add some depth to the nutty flavor that ends up in the crust. > > \*\* I cannot WAIT to try this part. My mother taught my sister, and my sister taught me. Both of them made/make pie crusts that any food magazine would feature on the cover. They used a combination of Crisco and butter and make a “short” dough. The reason for the short dough is that if you use the full amount in the mixing, and then flour your board for rolling, you’ll add too much flour to the dough and it will suffer for it. Here is the recipe, which I’ve guarded jealously for many years: 2 cups flour 1/2 tsp salt 1/2 cup butter, chilled 1/3 cup Crisco, chilled 1/3 cup orange juice, chilled Sift flour and salt together; cut the butter and crisco into flour with a pastry cutter. Add orange juice a few drops at a time while mixing with a fork. when the dough starts to come together form into a ball with hands, then cut it in half. At this point, chill the dough. You may not need all the OJ, depending on weather, etc. Take one half and form into a ball. Put on a well-floured board (as much as a cup). Because it’s a short dough, it can stand to pick up flour when being rolled out. You want the crust to sort of “float” on top of the flour. Roll the crust three or four times. Flip, spread four out and roll out thin, using light pressure and working quickly. Roll the dough back onto the rolling pin, and roll into a pie pan. I’d refrigerate this part until you roll out the top crust in the same way, adding more flour to the board. When ready, put the filling into the pan, wet the edge with OJ, place the top crust on and crimp to the bottom crust. Brush the top lightly with milk, sprinkle with granulated sugar, and cut a few vents in the top. Put a strip of foil around the crimped edge to prevent over-browning. Bake at 450 for 1/2 hour, remove the foil and lower the heat to 350 for the remaining cooking time. Good pie crusts take practice. True works of art take a LOT of practice. ---
**Author:** ![Athena](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/35a633/32.png) [@Athena](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Athena)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 2012, 8:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-can-cook-you-know-that/639268/66 "2012-10-30T20:10:30Z")
re: piecrust. I do part Crisco and part high-fat butter (unless I’m using lard… 😃 ) - Plugra or equivalent. I think the high-fat butter makes a HUGE difference. Buy your Crisco in sticks and just keep one in the back of the fridge. Then you’ll always have cold Crisco. On the vodka thing: I’ve done it that way before. The big advantage is that it adds more liquid to the crust so that it’s easier to roll out, then as you bake, the vodka evaporates, leaving a flaky crust. I’ve never had trouble getting a flaky crust without vodka, and I think the no-vodka method tastes better, so I just do it normally. But I’m apparently a pie crust savant. I’ve never had problems with them, and to me, they seem super easy and quick. Which is a real stupid gift to have, because personally I don’t really like pie crust all that much. It’s the filling that’s the good part IMO. ---
**Author:** ![flight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/bbce88/32.png) [@flight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/flight)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 2012, 8:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-can-cook-you-know-that/639268/67 "2012-10-30T20:17:44Z")
> [@Smapti](#): > > Artificial vanilla isn’t worth the bottle it comes in. Not so. Artificial vanilla is as good if not better in baked goods (the subtle notes of the natural vanilla are lost). If you are not baking, then there is no substitute for the real thing. ---
**Author:** ![Astroboy14](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/df705f/32.png) [@Astroboy14](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Astroboy14)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 2012, 9:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-can-cook-you-know-that/639268/68 "2012-10-30T21:56:50Z")
An occasional slip of the hand and a loud-ish “Oops!” are greatly appreciated by the 4 footed members of the household. ---
**Author:** ![AnthonyElite](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b487fb/32.png) [@AnthonyElite](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AnthonyElite)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2012, 12:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-can-cook-you-know-that/639268/69 "2012-10-31T00:37:09Z")
I love it Astroboy, so true! So long as you have dogs you never have to clean WHILE your cooking! Great ideas everyone…some contradicting but that’s what makes Chefs, I suppose. I really like the Vodka in pastry dough idea…I guess the concept is that the alcohol can withstand much colder temps…? ---
**Author:** ![\_Olive](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/_/4af34b/32.png) [@\_Olive](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/_Olive)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2012, 1:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-can-cook-you-know-that/639268/70 "2012-10-31T01:12:04Z")
It’s all about presentation. ---
**Author:** ![Fatwater\_Fewl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/4491bb/32.png) [@Fatwater\_Fewl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fatwater_Fewl)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2012, 1:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-can-cook-you-know-that/639268/71 "2012-10-31T01:33:57Z")
> [@Ethilrist](#): > > Cheap knives aren’t worth owning. Even if you buy all the rest of your cooking gear at thrift stores, buy yourself a couple of really good knives and a steel and USE THE STEEL. > [@Grestarian](#): > > All right, I just had to tack a corollary onto this one: > > A safe knife is a sharp knife, but if you don’t know what you’re doing and don’t want to learn, take your blades to somebody who can do it properly. An untrained/unskilled person can do more damage to a blade when \*trying \*to sharpen it than he can when simply not sharpening that knife. > > —G! > . Tang Soo Do, Tai Chi, Iaido, Italian fencing…I can do a lot with a blade – even prepare food 😃 A steel does not sharpen knives, it is used to maintain the edge on a knife that is already sharp. To sharpen a knife, use a whetstone. ---
**Author:** ![babygoat666](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/2acd7d/32.png) [@babygoat666](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/babygoat666)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2012, 2:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-can-cook-you-know-that/639268/72 "2012-10-31T02:06:19Z")
> [@Chronos](#): > > Where do you live that you can get fresh tomatoes at a supermarket? All I ever see are red tomato-shaped objects that bear no culinary resemblance to the real thing. Wait. What happened to your tomatoes now? ---
**Author:** ![orderfire](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/orderfire/32/10908_2.png) [@orderfire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/orderfire)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2012, 2:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-can-cook-you-know-that/639268/73 "2012-10-31T02:14:46Z")
I love this thread and the contributors, for so many reasons. Unfortunately I’m now kind of drunk and have the hiccups, so individual accolades will have to wait. If you’re curious, though, my hiccup cure is a tablespoon of cider vinegar. Works every time. ---
**Author:** ![flight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/bbce88/32.png) [@flight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/flight)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2012, 2:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-can-cook-you-know-that/639268/74 "2012-10-31T02:25:15Z")
A falling knife has no handle. Invaluable advice. ---
**Author:** ![Hershele\_Ostropoler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e47c2d/32.png) [@Hershele\_Ostropoler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hershele_Ostropoler)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2012, 3:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-can-cook-you-know-that/639268/75 "2012-10-31T03:50:28Z")
There is no actual reason for brownie mix to exist. ---
**Author:** ![Unintentionally\_Blank](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/unintentionally_blank/32/5418_2.png) [@Unintentionally\_Blank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Unintentionally_Blank)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2012, 4:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-can-cook-you-know-that/639268/76 "2012-10-31T04:47:09Z")
Food is cheap. Food poisoning? Not so much. If something is telling you the food ain’t right, pitch it. **TruCelt** Or Dear God I just discovered Irish butter (and Irish steelcut Oatmeal) Fan freeking tastic they are! Popcorn. In a popcorn pan. On the stove. **Cocanut Oil**. Temp just above medium high. When done popping, add a touch of butter and seasalt, then cover liberally in Parmesan Cheese. Do not attempt unless you have enough for a second batch. Nothing turns crap into wonderful like time. A slowcooker in the winter is a joyous thing. Pork Green Chili. Red Chili. Split Pea Soup. Pot roast. I was at a coffee shop and the sugar dispenser was the kind that is forever clogged and won’t pour. Unscrew the lid, decant two tsp into my hand, and into my coffee. The lady next to me looked like I’d grown a second head. I said “Don’t cook, do you?”, she said “no.” Use real butter. Eat Fatty Foods. Use Real Sugar. All in moderation. ---
**Author:** ![Becky2844](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/91b2a8/32.png) [@Becky2844](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Becky2844)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2012, 5:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-can-cook-you-know-that/639268/77 "2012-10-31T05:07:45Z")
When fixing a big meal, like Thanksgiving dinner, all the casseroles (broccoli, sweet potatoes, green bean etc.) will cook well in the same hot oven as long as you tweak the temp a bit and put the various dishes in at the appropriate time. ---
**Author:** ![TruCelt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/trucelt/32/523_2.png) [@TruCelt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TruCelt)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2012, 1:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-can-cook-you-know-that/639268/78 "2012-10-31T13:48:54Z")
Most of the recipes we Americans grew up on were altered in the 1950’s to include water or skim milk and margerine or oil to replace teh ebil cream and butter. If you substitute heavy cream and butter for the water/oil/margerine the recipe calls for, the results will be blow your mind good. ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2012, 2:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-can-cook-you-know-that/639268/79 "2012-10-31T14:05:10Z")
Nothing brightens up the flavors of a dish like a quick squeeze of lemon juice at the end. Brewing is like baking. Know your ratios and be über-sanitary and you’re good. Recipes are for dilettantes. ---
**Author:** ![Dogzilla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e480ec/32.png) [@Dogzilla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dogzilla)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2012, 2:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-can-cook-you-know-that/639268/80 "2012-10-31T14:07:14Z")
Alright, y’all have offered so many different pie crust techniques that I’m afraid I will be spending the week of Thanksgiving making about four different pies to test out your recipes and techniques. I will return and report. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-can-cook-you-know-that/639268.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-can-cook-you-know-that/639268.md?page=5)