# If you could be any fictional character who would you be?
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-be-any-fictional-character-who-would-you-be/187409
**Category:** Cafe Society
**Created:** [July 10, 2003, 5:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-be-any-fictional-character-who-would-you-be/187409 "2003-07-10T05:45:11Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 1
### Author:  [@DaPearl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DaPearl)
#### Post date: [July 10, 2003, 5:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-be-any-fictional-character-who-would-you-be/187409/1 "2003-07-10T05:45:11Z")
Could be from a book, movie, Tv show, video game or whatever.
Me, I’d definately be Tony Soprano. He’s overweight, bald, and middle-aged, but still the coolest character ever.
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### Author:  [@Ephemera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ephemera)
#### Post date: [July 10, 2003, 5:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-be-any-fictional-character-who-would-you-be/187409/2 "2003-07-10T05:56:26Z")
Data from Star Trek: TNG.
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### Author:  [@Lyllyan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lyllyan)
#### Post date: [July 10, 2003, 6:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-be-any-fictional-character-who-would-you-be/187409/3 "2003-07-10T06:02:42Z")
Claire Fraser from the “Outlander” series.
mmmmm, Jamie Fraser goodness!
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### Author:  [@joyfool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/joyfool)
#### Post date: [July 10, 2003, 6:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-be-any-fictional-character-who-would-you-be/187409/4 "2003-07-10T06:03:04Z")
Without a moment’s hesitation… Pippi Longstocking! She was strong, fiercely independent, had a great sense of fashion ;), smart as a whip, ironically witty, lived alone and was friends with one very cool horse (who wouldn’t want that!!!). Oh, and street savy too.
Not to mention, her house was like a every kids’ dream come true. It was part jungle gym, part fort and part tree house, all rolled into one. She’s the absolutely freakin’ coolest. 😃 Besides, I love[d] the hair and freckles!
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### Author:  [@ElfWarriorFuzzy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ElfWarriorFuzzy)
#### Post date: [July 10, 2003, 6:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-be-any-fictional-character-who-would-you-be/187409/5 "2003-07-10T06:15:25Z")
Well, I’d say I wouldn’t mind being Brynda al Keylan in the 3rd book of the Rune Blade Trilogy…sword-wielding and yummy kilted Kenzie Catfoot…_puuuurrrrrrrrrrr_
I suppose I wouldn’t mind being Sorcia(sp?) in Willow either (Val Kilmer was a rather yummy Madmardigan(sp?)…)
Katt in Breath of Fire II is also pretty nifty since I’ve always kinda wanted to be a kitty creature…
I also have to say being Sarah in the Labrynth would be pretty nifty… I wouldn’t have to change my name, plus I’d get to confirm that goblin kings have crystal balls… 😉 LOL
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### Author:  [@Vlad\_Dracul](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Vlad_Dracul)
#### Post date: [July 10, 2003, 6:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-be-any-fictional-character-who-would-you-be/187409/6 "2003-07-10T06:29:59Z")
Bugs Bunny always seems to be having a good time. 🙂
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### Author:  [@Pixiesnix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pixiesnix)
#### Post date: [July 10, 2003, 6:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-be-any-fictional-character-who-would-you-be/187409/7 "2003-07-10T06:45:38Z")
Xena, Warrior Princess. I never get a chance to kick ass in real life, so this would be a welcome opportunity.
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### Author:  [@Odinoneeye](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Odinoneeye)
#### Post date: [July 10, 2003, 7:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-be-any-fictional-character-who-would-you-be/187409/8 "2003-07-10T07:57:21Z")
I was asked that question about 10 years ago and I said Hal Jordan (Green Lantern), but that was before the whole Parallax thing.
Hagbard Celine from Illuminatus.
Skeeve from the Myth Adventures books.
Johnny Rico from Cafe Flesh.
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### Author:  [@TeaRoses](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TeaRoses)
#### Post date: [July 10, 2003, 8:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-be-any-fictional-character-who-would-you-be/187409/9 "2003-07-10T08:03:19Z")
Well, as long as we don’t mean people we really think are like us, I’ll go for Integra Wingates Hellsing from the anime Hellsing. She’s gorgeous, kicks butt, shoots cool guns, and gets to hang out with the likes of Alucard and Walter. I’d give up the cigar habit though.
If it has be somebody we think we could actually pull off being… geez, I dunno, a grown-up Hermione Granger I guess. But she’s braver than I am too.
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### Author:  [@Mearl\_Dox](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mearl_Dox)
#### Post date: [July 10, 2003, 8:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-be-any-fictional-character-who-would-you-be/187409/10 "2003-07-10T08:21:42Z")
Ed from Cowboy Bebop. Although she was nearly the only part of Cowboy Bebop I really liked… Or, Captain Tylor from Irresponsible Captain Tylor.
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### Author:  [@The\_Seeker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Seeker)
#### Post date: [July 10, 2003, 9:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-be-any-fictional-character-who-would-you-be/187409/11 "2003-07-10T09:57:30Z")
I’d definitely be John Blackthorne from the novel Shogun. I think that living in 16th Century Japan would’ve been an awesome experience. His was an incredible story, going from a shipwrecked barbarian to Hatamoto (retainer of the Shogun) and enjoying the spoils of such an honour.
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### Author:  [@green\_bladder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/green_bladder)
#### Post date: [July 10, 2003, 10:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-be-any-fictional-character-who-would-you-be/187409/12 "2003-07-10T10:34:37Z")
Thought about this for about five minutes, 😉 and I must admit, Tony Soprano is a good choice there, **DaPearl**. He’s got money, family and friends (and singing fish) and he doesn’t seem to do much. I’ll pick either Tony or Frasier Crane. Frasier: Interesting job, sweet apartment and (what seems like) a pretty cool city.
Other honourable mentions:
James Bond - babes 'n gadgets
Bill Murray’s character in _Groundhog Day_ (maybe not for too long, though)
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### Author:  [@HDS](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HDS)
#### Post date: [July 10, 2003, 10:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-be-any-fictional-character-who-would-you-be/187409/13 "2003-07-10T10:44:33Z")
Nanny Ogg. Lots of husbands, kids, likes a drink, likes another drink, her daughters in law do all the work, flies around on a broomstick, has a wonderful sense of humour, and has a cat that turns into a very handsome naked man on occasion. Oh, and Casanundra. Definitely Casanundra.
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### Author:  [@Idlewild](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Idlewild)
#### Post date: [July 10, 2003, 11:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-be-any-fictional-character-who-would-you-be/187409/14 "2003-07-10T11:33:10Z")
It would involve a slight sex-reassignment, but it’s a small price to pay - I’d like to be Simon Templar, the Saint. Preferably from the earlier books, but I’d settle for ‘as played by Roger Moore.’ He never ages, he’s rich, handsome, smart, funny, and a whizz with a gun, and most of all, he divides his time between being on vacation in exotic locales and the world of high crime. Without ever being prosecuted. Where can I sign up?
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### Author:  [@Zeldar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zeldar)
#### Post date: [July 10, 2003, 11:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-be-any-fictional-character-who-would-you-be/187409/15 "2003-07-10T11:51:46Z")
Either Sherlock Holmes or James Bond. Holmes most likely.
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### Author:  [@summerbreeze](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/summerbreeze)
#### Post date: [July 10, 2003, 2:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-be-any-fictional-character-who-would-you-be/187409/16 "2003-07-10T14:14:40Z")
Scout Finch. Surely she grew up to be a remarkable woman, having a father like Atticus.
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### Author:  [@Philster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Philster)
#### Post date: [July 10, 2003, 2:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-be-any-fictional-character-who-would-you-be/187409/17 "2003-07-10T14:17:17Z")
Maybe Astronaut Major Anthony Nelson, Jeannie’s Master, from I Dream of Jeannie.
You give me a Genie like her, make me her Master and I’ll take it from there.
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### Author:  [@TelcontarStorm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TelcontarStorm)
#### Post date: [July 10, 2003, 2:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-be-any-fictional-character-who-would-you-be/187409/18 "2003-07-10T14:24:42Z")
Ghanima of Dune
Hawkeye Pierce of M_A_S\*H
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### Author:  [@Fretful\_Porpentine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fretful_Porpentine)
#### Post date: [July 10, 2003, 2:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-be-any-fictional-character-who-would-you-be/187409/19 "2003-07-10T14:33:22Z")
Professor McGonagall from the Harry Potter books. It would be such a neat world to live in, and she’s the sort of teacher I would like to be someday.
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### Author:  [@Retief](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Retief)
#### Post date: [July 10, 2003, 2:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-be-any-fictional-character-who-would-you-be/187409/20 "2003-07-10T14:45:49Z")
Why Keith Laumer’s Retief of course !
There has never been a cooler hero
Retief
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