# If you could be... **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [February 15, 2005, 10:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-be/290271 "2005-02-15T22:36:31Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Ephemera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8baadc/32.png) [@Ephemera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ephemera)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2005, 3:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-be/290271/21 "2005-02-17T03:20:54Z")
> [@Anaamika](#): > > No, no, no! [Romulans and elves] are not the same thing. True, Rihannsu are about seventy-two times cooler but I just have a fetish for the pointy-eared and would just be happy to be either. ---
**Author:** ![klintypooh](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/3da27b/32.png) [@klintypooh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/klintypooh)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2005, 3:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-be/290271/22 "2005-02-17T03:24:36Z")
Can I be Thanos please? šŸ™‚ ---
**Author:** ![wolf\_meister](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wolf_meister/32/15202_2.png) [@wolf\_meister](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wolf_meister)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2005, 3:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-be/290271/23 "2005-02-17T03:29:20Z")
Well, if people want to take a wild-assed-guess, Iā€™ll put my choice in a spoiler box. Hint - my name just might have a correlation to my choice. A wolf of course !!! If I had a second choice, a Great Horned Owl would be nice. ---
**Author:** ![CynicalGabe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/3e96dc/32.png) [@CynicalGabe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CynicalGabe)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2005, 3:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-be/290271/24 "2005-02-17T03:32:45Z")
> [@Tracy Lord](#): > > Iā€™d be a liger. Itā€™s pretty much my favorite animal. Itā€™s like a lion and a tiger mixed, bred for its skills in magic. CRAP!! šŸ˜ƒ ---
**Author:** ![Stuffy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f17d59/32.png) [@Stuffy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stuffy)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2005, 4:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-be/290271/25 "2005-02-17T04:33:14Z")
Iā€™d be a Voidhawk, if youā€™re not awae of Peter F. Hamiltonā€™s Night Dawn Trilogy, this is basically a living starship. If I canā€™t have that, I wouldnā€™t mind being Dumbo, I could fly plusā€¦ Iā€™m an Elephant B@#ch!!! sorry, that Rick James joke has corrupted my psyche. ---
**Author:** ![Clothahump](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/51bf81/32.png) [@Clothahump](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Clothahump)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2005, 4:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-be/290271/26 "2005-02-17T16:43:49Z")
Iā€™d like to be the Death of the Discworld and speak IN CAPITAL LETTERS ALL THE TIME. šŸ˜ƒ ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2005, 4:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-be/290271/27 "2005-02-17T16:45:37Z")
> [@Aesiron](#): > > True, Rihannsu are about seventy-two times cooler but I just have a fetish for the pointy-eared and would just be happy to be either. Whatā€™s a Rihannsu? Some kind of Romulan? And I think Elves are cooler. ---
**Author:** ![AndyPolley](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/54ee81/32.png) [@AndyPolley](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AndyPolley)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2005, 4:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-be/290271/28 "2005-02-17T16:53:20Z")
> [@klintypooh](#): > > Can I be Thanos please? šŸ™‚ I donā€™t think Thanos would get invited to many partiesā€¦ Fantasy-wise Iā€™d love to be a shape-shifter. Feel like flyingā€¦letā€™s sprout some wings. Feel like looking meanā€¦Grrrā€“Now I look mean. For real animals, I always used to be facinated with squirlls. The way they leap from trees & telephone polesā€¦the way the chase each other aroundā€¦I always thought they were neat. Of course, now that Iā€™m grown up, I realize theyā€™re gloified rats and pretty icky. ---
**Author:** ![CandidGamera](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/candidgamera/32/2878_2.png) [@CandidGamera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CandidGamera)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2005, 5:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-be/290271/29 "2005-02-17T17:05:13Z")
Kryptonian would be nice. ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2005, 5:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-be/290271/30 "2005-02-17T17:24:22Z")
> [@CandidGamera](#): > > Kryptonian would be nice. Umā€¦ you want to be a rock that Superman is afraid of? (searches memory desperately) Oh, right. Supermanā€™s \*\*planet \*\* is named Krypton, right? ---
**Author:** ![CandidGamera](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/candidgamera/32/2878_2.png) [@CandidGamera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CandidGamera)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2005, 5:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-be/290271/31 "2005-02-17T17:32:25Z")
> [@Anaamika](#): > > Umā€¦ you want to be a rock that Superman is afraid of? > > (searches memory desperately) > > Oh, right. Supermanā€™s \*\*planet \*\* is named Krypton, right? Oh, dear. You desperately need basic comic education 101. šŸ˜‰ Yes. The planet was Krypton; and the people, Kryptonians. ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2005, 5:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-be/290271/32 "2005-02-17T17:36:37Z")
> [@CandidGamera](#): > > Oh, dear. You desperately need basic comic education 101. šŸ˜‰ > > Yes. The planet was Krypton; and the people, Kryptonians. The only one that interests me at all are the X-Men! And theyā€™re fascinating. Superman is silly and has ridiculousy high morals and unfair advantages. Batmanā€™s cool, but heā€™s completely been superceded by X-Men. And I barely know any others. ---
**Author:** ![Kaitlyn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/73ab20/32.png) [@Kaitlyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kaitlyn)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2005, 5:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-be/290271/33 "2005-02-17T17:37:37Z")
A DCU Martian. Shapeshifting, invisibility, intangibility, telepathy, and all of Supermanā€™s powers. ---
**Author:** ![CandidGamera](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/candidgamera/32/2878_2.png) [@CandidGamera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CandidGamera)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2005, 5:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-be/290271/34 "2005-02-17T17:42:43Z")
> [@Kaitlyn](#): > > A DCU Martian. Shapeshifting, invisibility, intangibility, telepathy, and all of Supermanā€™s powers. See, I considered them, but Fire? Way too common in our world. Eliminated Daxamites because of the whole ā€˜leadā€™ thing. Briefly considered the Guardians, but a nigh-omnipotent smurf is still a smurf. ---
**Author:** ![Scarface\_Z](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/50afbb/32.png) [@Scarface\_Z](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scarface_Z)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2005, 6:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-be/290271/35 "2005-02-17T18:40:46Z")
Sadly, my initial reaction was that I wanted to be aids so that no one could kill me. However, further review of this answer sickened me and so I resorted to come up with an alternative. I would want to be snowy owl. That way I could fly around, shit on people, peck them, and chase wood peckers and no could do anything about it because I would be endangered. Also, I would fill peopleā€™s mailboxes with dead squirrels. Man! I want to an owl! šŸ˜ƒ ---
**Author:** ![Fiver](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e274bd/32.png) [@Fiver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fiver)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2005, 8:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-be/290271/36 "2005-02-17T20:05:10Z")
> [@Tracy Lord](#): > > Iā€™d be a liger. Itā€™s pretty much my favorite animal. Itā€™s like a lion and a tiger mixed, bred for its skills in magic. What are you talking about? A [liger](http://www.sierrasafarizoo.com/animals/liger.htm) is a real animal, just as is a [tigon](http://www.greenapple.com/~jorp/amzanim/cross02a.htm), and theyā€™re not really bred at all, since those few that do occur (in zoos) tend to be sterile. Theyā€™re certainly not bred for their ā€œskills in magic,ā€ since, again, they exist in the real world. ---
**Author:** ![slortar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/6bbea6/32.png) [@slortar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/slortar)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2005, 9:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-be/290271/37 "2005-02-17T21:06:19Z")
> [@Scarface Z](#): > > Also, I would fill peopleā€™s mailboxes with dead squirrels. Man! I want to an owl! šŸ˜ƒ _wild applause_ I wanna be one, too. We should start an owl gang and have a secret gang sign. ---
**Author:** ![Kaitlyn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/73ab20/32.png) [@Kaitlyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kaitlyn)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2005, 10:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-be/290271/38 "2005-02-17T22:36:35Z")
> [@CandidGamera](#): > > See, I considered them, but Fire? Way too common in our world. Eliminated Daxamites because of the whole ā€˜leadā€™ thing. > > Briefly considered the Guardians, but a nigh-omnipotent smurf is still a smurf. The fire weakness is psychological, at least in green Martians like Jā€™onn, so it wouldnā€™t affect me. Mythology: A Greek goddess. Athena would be goodā€“intelligence, beauty, prowess in battle, mastery of the female arts (ie, weaving and other domestic stuff, not necessarily sex). In the animal world, a dolphin. ---
**Author:** ![Scarface\_Z](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/50afbb/32.png) [@Scarface\_Z](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scarface_Z)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2005, 12:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-be/290271/39 "2005-02-18T00:28:03Z")
> [@slortar](#): > > I wanna be one, too. We should start an owl gang and have a secret gang sign. Two flaps + 3/4 head swivel = Friend One flap + two hoots and a screech = I see a squirrel:) PS: I hate to pop the bubble, but donā€™t ligers also suffer from joint/spinal problems because of their size? I seem to remember that they are too big for their own good and are rather slow or clumsy, but that sould be from captivity. ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2005, 12:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-be/290271/40 "2005-02-18T00:36:08Z")
> [@Scarface Z](#): > > Sadly, my initial reaction was that I wanted to be aids so that no one could kill me. However, further review of this answer sickened me and so I resorted to come up with an alternative. > > I would want to be snowy owl. That way I could fly around, shit on people, peck them, and chase wood peckers and no could do anything about it because I would be endangered. Also, I would fill peopleā€™s mailboxes with dead squirrels. Man! I want to an owl! šŸ˜ƒ **Scarface Z** , I would have thought you wanted to be a bear. šŸ˜ƒ [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-be/290271.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-be/290271.md?page=3)