# If you could change one line from a song **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [July 22, 2016, 6:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-change-one-line-from-a-song/760562 "2016-07-22T06:15:35Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 15\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Guest-starring\_Id](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guest-starring_id/32/21736_2.png) [@Guest-starring\_Id](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guest-starring_Id)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2016, 2:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-change-one-line-from-a-song/760562/41 "2016-07-29T02:39:04Z")
Just remembered. The worst fucking lyric of all time. ZZ Top “She’s got legs. She knows how to use them.” I think this might roll off the tongue a bit better: "She’s got legs. She knows how to put one foot in front of the fucking other in a manner resembling walk-ing. ---
**Author:** ![installLSC](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/54ee81/32.png) [@installLSC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/installLSC)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2016, 4:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-change-one-line-from-a-song/760562/42 "2016-07-29T04:08:26Z")
> [@gigi](#): > > A couple I have to hum to: > > You scumbag you maggot you cheap lousy HMM-HMM > > When you look into my eyes > And you see the crazy HMM-HMM in my soul > It always comes as a surprise > When I feel my withered roots begin to grow In the same vein, Oliver’s Army by Elvis Costello: > [@](#): > > All it takes is one itchy trigger > One more widow, one less white (hmm, what offensive word rhymes with “trigger”?) ---
**Author:** ![Sunshine\_and\_Smiles](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a5b964/32.png) [@Sunshine\_and\_Smiles](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunshine_and_Smiles)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2016, 4:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-change-one-line-from-a-song/760562/43 "2016-07-29T04:11:28Z")
I like this **Kiss** edit: “I want to rock and roll all night, and _probably_ every day.” ---
**Author:** ![ZipperJJ](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zipperjj/32/211_2.png) [@ZipperJJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZipperJJ)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2016, 4:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-change-one-line-from-a-song/760562/44 "2016-07-29T04:23:15Z")
> [@Eddie The Horrible](#): > > Just remembered. > > The worst fucking lyric of all time. > > ZZ Top > > "She’s got legs. > > She knows how to use them." > > I think this might roll off the tongue a bit better: > > "She’s got legs. > > She knows how to put one foot in front of the fucking other in a manner resembling walk-ing. You know they are not talking about using your legs to walk right? Are you being clever? 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2016, 8:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-change-one-line-from-a-song/760562/45 "2016-07-29T08:44:18Z")
The close of the song _Hey There_ goes: “Or are you not seeing things too clear? Are you just too far gone to hear? Is it all going in one ear and out the other?” I would change the penultimate line to: “Are you just too fucked-up to hear?” ---
**Author:** ![Guest-starring\_Id](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guest-starring_id/32/21736_2.png) [@Guest-starring\_Id](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guest-starring_Id)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2016, 2:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-change-one-line-from-a-song/760562/46 "2016-07-29T14:01:21Z")
> [@ZipperJJ](#): > > You know they are not talking about using your legs to walk right? Are you being clever? 🙂 Oh? She’s actually using them for attraction as opposed to a concerted effort at bipedal conveyance?:smack: The lyrics are impeachably turd-like, sorta like these Dr. John song titles: “Baby Makes Her Blue Jeans Talk” “You Make My Pants Want to Get Up and Dance” ---
**Author:** ![Dung\_Beetle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dung_beetle/32/7945_2.png) [@Dung\_Beetle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dung_Beetle)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2016, 3:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-change-one-line-from-a-song/760562/47 "2016-07-29T15:01:03Z")
Almost any line from [Too Much Time On My Hands](http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/styx/toomuchtimeonmyhands.html) that begins, “Is it any wonder”. Such as > [@Styx](#): > > Is it any wonder I’m not crazy? It would make more sense to say, “Is it any wonder I’m so crazy?” Why would you need to justify\* not \*being crazy? ---
**Author:** ![koeeoaddi](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/koeeoaddi/32/408_2.png) [@koeeoaddi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/koeeoaddi)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2016, 3:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-change-one-line-from-a-song/760562/48 "2016-07-29T15:12:38Z")
Mona Lisas and Mad Hatters _For unless they see the sky but they can’t and that is why they **know not** if it’s dark outside or light_ “Don’t know” would work rhythmically just as well. “Know not” is such a stilted, archaic, self consciously poetic construction. Annoys me every time I hear it. ---
**Author:** ![Son\_of\_a\_Rich](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/son_of_a_rich/32/5439_2.png) [@Son\_of\_a\_Rich](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Son_of_a_Rich)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2016, 4:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-change-one-line-from-a-song/760562/49 "2016-07-29T16:01:20Z")
Springsteen should change the lyrics from “Bonn in the USA” to “Born in the USA”. ---
**Author:** ![drad\_dog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/aeb1de/32.png) [@drad\_dog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drad_dog)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2016, 4:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-change-one-line-from-a-song/760562/50 "2016-07-29T16:16:35Z")
> [@koeeoaddi](#): > > Mona Lisas and Mad Hatters > > _For unless they see the sky > but they can’t and that is why > they **know not** if it’s dark outside or light_ > > “Don’t know” would work rhythmically just as well. “Know not” is such a stilted, archaic, self consciously poetic construction. Annoys me every time I hear it. A song shouldn’t be poetic? It’s not that unusual grammar. It sung better. Sometimes trust the pro. IMHO. ---
**Author:** ![Erik\_the\_Viking](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ce73a5/32.png) [@Erik\_the\_Viking](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Erik_the_Viking)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2016, 4:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-change-one-line-from-a-song/760562/51 "2016-07-29T16:20:24Z")
Of Monsters and Men, “Little Talks”: 'Cause though the truth may vary This ship will carry our bodies safe_ly_ to shore ---
**Author:** ![gigi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a587f6/32.png) [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2016, 7:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-change-one-line-from-a-song/760562/52 "2016-07-29T19:20:12Z")
> [@Sunshine\_and\_Smiles](#): > > I like this **Kiss** edit: > > “I want to rock and roll all night, > and _probably_ every day.” Or as in **Role Models** : Danny: Hey, don’t get me wrong, all right; I like to rock and roll all night. And part of every day. Wheeler: Party every day. Rock and roll all night and party every day. Danny: I like to rock and roll part of every day. Wheeler: Party every day. Danny: I usually have errands. I can rock and roll from like one to three. ---
**Author:** ![Memnon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f1d935/32.png) [@Memnon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Memnon)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2016, 7:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-change-one-line-from-a-song/760562/53 "2016-07-29T19:25:51Z")
In John Lennon’s ‘Imagine’, I’d change the line “And no religion, too” to “Walker told me I have AIDS”. ---
**Author:** ![Guest-starring\_Id](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guest-starring_id/32/21736_2.png) [@Guest-starring\_Id](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guest-starring_Id)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2016, 11:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-change-one-line-from-a-song/760562/54 "2016-07-29T23:29:31Z")
> [@Dung\_Beetle](#): > > Almost any line from [Too Much Time On My Hands](http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/styx/toomuchtimeonmyhands.html) that begins, “Is it any wonder”. > > Such as It would make more sense to say, “Is it any wonder I’m so crazy?” Why would you need to justify\* not \*being crazy? Yeah that and the Roboto song really _really_ made me want to dynamite Styx. Especially the dorky way he says “pres-i-deeennnnntt?” Or the way he joins “insanity-_I’ve_ got” “Is it any won-der I’ve got too much, [clap clap] spunk on my hands…” ---
**Author:** ![pohjonen](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pohjonen/32/423_2.png) [@pohjonen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pohjonen)\ **Post date:** [July 30, 2016, 1:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-change-one-line-from-a-song/760562/55 "2016-07-30T01:51:41Z")
Johnny Angel: I’m in heaven, I get carried away I dream of you and me and how it’s gonna be Other fellas call me up for a date - But I just sit and wait - I’d rather masturbate For Johnny Angel That and the Lionel Ritchie That’s why I’m queasy - queasy like Sunday morning [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-change-one-line-from-a-song/760562.md?page=2)