# If you could rename any band, what would be a better name? **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [October 7, 2017, 4:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-rename-any-band-what-would-be-a-better-name/798167 "2017-10-07T04:29:36Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Mr\_Shine](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mr_shine/32/464_2.png) [@Mr\_Shine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr_Shine)\ **Post date:** [October 8, 2017, 8:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-rename-any-band-what-would-be-a-better-name/798167/21 "2017-10-08T20:09:43Z")
Fall Out Boy sticks out ad extreme idiocy in naming. Apparently they were asking for names from an audience and someone suggested “Fallout Boy” like the metafictional Simpsons character. Too stupid to realise that fallout is one word, they became Fall Out Boy, which only makes sense as an order, with punctuartion. “Fall out, boy!” ---
**Author:** ![Go\_Arachnid\_Laser\_1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/b2d939/32.png) [@Go\_Arachnid\_Laser\_1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Go_Arachnid_Laser_1)\ **Post date:** [October 8, 2017, 8:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-rename-any-band-what-would-be-a-better-name/798167/22 "2017-10-08T20:23:11Z")
What about “The Eagles of Death Metal”? The name is some inside joke I’ve heard several variations of (the most usual is that a friend described another band’s music as sounding like, well, that), and of course, how hilarious, they don’t actually sound at all like the Eagles and they don’t play Death Metal. They do bluegrass garage rock. Isn’t that the funniest thing ever? /s Jesus Christ, this “_I’m too cool to care about our name making sense_” attitude literally offends me. They should have gone for something like, I don’t know, “Hugues, Homme and the Bad News Band”. ---
**Author:** ![Ranger\_Jeff](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ranger_jeff/32/2065_2.png) [@Ranger\_Jeff](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ranger_Jeff)\ **Post date:** [October 8, 2017, 8:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-rename-any-band-what-would-be-a-better-name/798167/23 "2017-10-08T20:50:57Z")
Back in my days, there was a local band named “Rudy Baker And The Vegetables”. I thought that was a pretty good name. There was another band named “Icarus”, which I didn’t like much but it was better than “Nick B\_\_\_\_'s band.” I was half an acoustic duo with Gerry D, and we called ourselves “Rocco And The Four Speed Dual Quad Posi Traction 409s”, but for some reason, in the coffee house circles we performed in, the name never caught on. The last band I was in, they rejected both my name suggestions, “Four Jacks And A Jill” and “Half Fast”. And I even came up with a good logo for Half Fast. ---
**Author:** ![Trancephalic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/trancephalic/32/380_2.png) [@Trancephalic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trancephalic)\ **Post date:** [October 8, 2017, 9:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-rename-any-band-what-would-be-a-better-name/798167/24 "2017-10-08T21:40:00Z")
“The Buggles” is a really stupid name, but I cannot think of anything better. Apparently the name is derived from “The Beatles,” so it’s a stupid name inspired by a stupid name, making it stupid². ---
**Author:** ![Lamia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8e7dd6/32.png) [@Lamia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lamia)\ **Post date:** [October 8, 2017, 11:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-rename-any-band-what-would-be-a-better-name/798167/25 "2017-10-08T23:13:26Z")
> [@Go\_Arachnid\_Laser](#): > > For instance, Pearl Jam is a terrible name. They told a couple of unconvincing stories about the origin of the name (first something about Eddie Vedder’s grandma making jam, another about being called “Pearl” at first and adding “Jam” as in a music jam) > > But everybody knows it’s a childish, jokey way of calling their band “semen”. People have been making this claim for decades now, but few bands strike me as less likely to have deliberately given themselves a smutty joke name. I’ll grant that it _sounds_ like a smutty joke name, but although there certainly are bands that chose smutty joke names for themselves, in the case of Pearl Jam I believe this really was unintended. In an early promo video for the band Eddie Vedder claimed that their name was inspired by a family legend about his great-grandmother Pearl’s hallucinogenic peyote jam, but he admitted in a [2006 _Rolling Stone_ article](https://web.archive.org/web/20070524100715/http://www.rollingstone.com:80/news/coverstory/pearl_jam_the_second_coming/page/3) this was “total bullshit.” No cite, but I remember reading elsewhere that Vedder said “pearl” and “jam” were chosen more or less arbitrarily after brainstorming several possible band names, and that at the time he figured they’d think of something better later and change it. In the same article linked above, bandmate Jeff Ament tells a similar story, saying he suggested the “pearl” bit during a band name brainstorming session and that the “jam” bit was added later, inspired by a Neil Young concert that featured extended jamming. This (unlike the peyote jam story) is a boring enough explanation that I see no reason to doubt it. As for better names they could have chosen, I know that Vedder is (like me) a big fan of The Who, and so might plausibly have suggested something inspired by their music. They could have beaten the (IMHO inferior) band Lifehouse to being called “Lifehouse”. _Lifehouse_ was the working title of an aborted Who rock opera that was salvaged as the classic album _Who’s Next_, although according to their [Wikipedia entry](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lifehouse_(band)), this _isn’t_ where the actual band Lifehouse got their name. ---
**Author:** ![buddha\_david](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ee7513/32.png) [@buddha\_david](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buddha_david)\ **Post date:** [October 8, 2017, 11:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-rename-any-band-what-would-be-a-better-name/798167/26 "2017-10-08T23:58:45Z")
**The Guess Who** sounds like a name chosen for an Abbott & Costello routine: “Hey, Guess Who’s playing tonight.” “Umm, I dunno. Seals & Croft?” “No, Guess Who.” “Geez, why don’t you just tell me – Badfinger?” “No, Guess Who.” “I don’t like these games. Is it the Bay City Rollers?” “I already told you. Guess Who.” “No, you didn’t! Who is it? Steely Dan?” “Nope. Why do you keep mentioning random band names?” “AAARRRGGH!!!” ---
**Author:** ![Kropotkin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kropotkin/32/18045_2.png) [@Kropotkin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kropotkin)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2017, 12:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-rename-any-band-what-would-be-a-better-name/798167/27 "2017-10-09T00:25:09Z")
I would rename “Kansas” to “Oz.” ---
**Author:** ![ZipperJJ](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zipperjj/32/211_2.png) [@ZipperJJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZipperJJ)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2017, 1:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-rename-any-band-what-would-be-a-better-name/798167/28 "2017-10-09T01:45:41Z")
Barenaked Ladies was probably funny once. Not sure why they stuck with it. Not sure what a good replacement would be. Pretty much anything. ---
**Author:** ![Go\_Arachnid\_Laser\_1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/b2d939/32.png) [@Go\_Arachnid\_Laser\_1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Go_Arachnid_Laser_1)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2017, 4:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-rename-any-band-what-would-be-a-better-name/798167/29 "2017-10-09T04:09:25Z")
> [@Lamia](#): > > People have been making this claim for decades now, but few bands strike me as less likely to have deliberately given themselves a smutty joke name. I’ll grant that it _sounds_ like a smutty joke name, but although there certainly are bands that chose smutty joke names for themselves, in the case of Pearl Jam I believe this really was unintended. > > In an early promo video for the band Eddie Vedder claimed that their name was inspired by a family legend about his great-grandmother Pearl’s hallucinogenic peyote jam, but he admitted in a [2006 _Rolling Stone_ article](https://web.archive.org/web/20070524100715/http://www.rollingstone.com:80/news/coverstory/pearl_jam_the_second_coming/page/3) this was “total bullshit.” No cite, but I remember reading elsewhere that Vedder said “pearl” and “jam” were chosen more or less arbitrarily after brainstorming several possible band names, and that at the time he figured they’d think of something better later and change it. In the same article linked above, bandmate Jeff Ament tells a similar story, saying he suggested the “pearl” bit during a band name brainstorming session and that the “jam” bit was added later, inspired by a Neil Young concert that featured extended jamming. This (unlike the peyote jam story) is a boring enough explanation that I see no reason to doubt it. They really aren’t above smutty jokes at all. The name I suggested, the one from their album “versus”, comes from the refrain Vedder sings in the intro to Animal\* “one, two, three, four, five… against one”\*, which is, itself, a masturbation joke. I’m fine with that. I’m not fine with Pearl Jam for a rock band. That’s a terrible name. ---
**Author:** ![pulykamell](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pulykamell/32/3166_2.png) [@pulykamell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pulykamell)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2017, 4:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-rename-any-band-what-would-be-a-better-name/798167/30 "2017-10-09T04:13:12Z")
I’m with the Pearl Jam is fine crowd. I was in high school when the band broke through. Never heard a single masturbation or semen reference about their name. The Animal stuff is completely new to me as well. Freshman in college. Never heard anything about that, either. Seems to me to just be anything can be a sexual (or drug) reference if you want it to be. ---
**Author:** ![Covfefe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ee7513/32.png) [@Covfefe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Covfefe)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2017, 4:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-rename-any-band-what-would-be-a-better-name/798167/31 "2017-10-09T04:41:49Z")
I had always had the impression Pearl Jam was at least partially basketball related because they originally called themselves Mookie Blaylock, and jam is another word for slam dunk. It makes me think of an early basketball video game where the ball appeared smaller and silver for a second if you timed the release of your shot right, though I’m thinking of a game released in '93 or '94, I have no knowledge if earlier games had such a feature. ---
**Author:** ![zoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zoid/32/336_2.png) [@zoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/zoid)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2017, 4:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-rename-any-band-what-would-be-a-better-name/798167/32 "2017-10-09T04:52:40Z")
The Doors should be renamed "Don’t Remotely Live Up To The Hype’ ---
**Author:** ![nearwildheaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/90db22/32.png) [@nearwildheaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nearwildheaven)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2017, 5:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-rename-any-band-what-would-be-a-better-name/798167/33 "2017-10-09T05:41:12Z")
> [@buddha\_david](#): > > **The Guess Who** sounds like a name chosen for an Abbott & Costello routine: > > “Hey, Guess Who’s playing tonight.” > “Umm, I dunno. Seals & Croft?” > “No, Guess Who.” > “Geez, why don’t you just tell me – Badfinger?” > “No, Guess Who.” > “I don’t like these games. Is it the Bay City Rollers?” > “I already told you. Guess Who.” > “No, you didn’t! Who is it? Steely Dan?” > “Nope. Why do you keep mentioning random band names?” > “AAARRRGGH!!!” Somewhere out there is a “Who’s On First?” parody where they’re promoting a triple bill featuring the Who, the Guess Who, and Yes. 😛 I remember hearing it and telling my parents about it, and wondering how they knew what I was talking about. Turns out they really didn’t, but they were familiar with “Who’s On First?” As for the OP, there was a band that achieved middling success in the early 1990s called Come. :o They had a female singer and denied that the name was intended to be sexual in any way. Yeah, right. p.s. Where do you think 10cc and the Lovin’ Spoonful got their names? ---
**Author:** ![Go\_Arachnid\_Laser\_1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/b2d939/32.png) [@Go\_Arachnid\_Laser\_1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Go_Arachnid_Laser_1)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2017, 6:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-rename-any-band-what-would-be-a-better-name/798167/34 "2017-10-09T06:58:07Z")
> [@nearwildheaven](#): > > Somewhere out there is a “Who’s On First?” parody where they’re promoting a triple bill featuring the Who, the Guess Who, and Yes. 😛 I remember hearing it and telling my parents about it, and wondering how they knew what I was talking about. Turns out they really didn’t, but they were familiar with “Who’s On First?” It was[The Who, The Band and Yes.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mdqv5xIsFLM) Animaniacs was pure genius sometimes. ---
**Author:** ![MrDibble](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mrdibble/32/114_2.png) [@MrDibble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrDibble)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2017, 8:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-rename-any-band-what-would-be-a-better-name/798167/35 "2017-10-09T08:06:16Z")
> [@Ranger\_Jeff](#): > > The last band I was in, they rejected both my name suggestions, “Four Jacks And A Jill” [Already taken](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A0WvXpyufT8)… ---
**Author:** ![MrDibble](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mrdibble/32/114_2.png) [@MrDibble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrDibble)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2017, 8:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-rename-any-band-what-would-be-a-better-name/798167/36 "2017-10-09T08:14:31Z")
> [@nearwildheaven](#): > > I thought Joy Division was a cool band name, until I found out what it really was. > > If you don’t know, it was a Nazi brothel, and no, the women were not there voluntarily. They were [well aware](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=10W07JBtzvc). They took the name from the novella House of Dolls. It was not celebratory at all. Personally, I think **New Order** should have chosen a different, non-Nazi-related name, though, just to distance themselves more from JD. ---
**Author:** ![WordMan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e8c25b/32.png) [@WordMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WordMan)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2017, 10:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-rename-any-band-what-would-be-a-better-name/798167/37 "2017-10-09T10:26:57Z")
Hijack for a stupid band name anecdote: at one point, my last band had me, two Brits and a Kiwi (New Zealander). When we had to come up with a band name, we had to take into account the fact that we’d be playing family events in town, otherwise we would’ve gone with \*Just One Yank. \*😉 ---
**Author:** ![I\_Love\_Me\_Vol.I](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/i_love_me_vol.i/32/521_2.png) [@I\_Love\_Me\_Vol.I](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/I_Love_Me_Vol.I)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2017, 10:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-rename-any-band-what-would-be-a-better-name/798167/38 "2017-10-09T10:54:22Z")
> [@EinsteinsHund](#): > > [The The](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_The), Matt Johnson’s band, had an unfortunate name, especially for today (though he couldn’t foresee that): it’s ungoogleable. I propose “The Definite Articles” instead. Hey! **The The** is, by a long shot, the single best band name ever. There is really no other name that can beat that other than perhaps something like “ **I** ” or “ **\_** ”, or " ". ETA: **The The** is quite Googleable. ---
**Author:** ![I\_Love\_Me\_Vol.I](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/i_love_me_vol.i/32/521_2.png) [@I\_Love\_Me\_Vol.I](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/I_Love_Me_Vol.I)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2017, 11:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-rename-any-band-what-would-be-a-better-name/798167/39 "2017-10-09T11:04:19Z")
Oh… two random hi-jacky thoughts… I always liked the name of an Indiana band from a while ago: _Jif and the Choosy Mothers_ Also, one I just thought up: _The Adjective Nouns_ ---
**Author:** ![Don\_Draper](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b2d939/32.png) [@Don\_Draper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Don_Draper)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2017, 1:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-rename-any-band-what-would-be-a-better-name/798167/40 "2017-10-09T13:07:01Z")
Wasn’t there a band a few years back called “!!!” or something? “10,000 Maniacs” always struck me as a poor fit for the band that used the name. The name itself conjures up the idea of a thrash/speed metal or punk band, instead of a quiet, ponderous folk rock combo. “? and the Mysterian” always struck me as a supremely dumb name. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-rename-any-band-what-would-be-a-better-name/798167.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-could-rename-any-band-what-would-be-a-better-name/798167.md?page=3)