Anyone else coming to the conclusion that echo6160 is in a relationship with someone he shouldn’t be and just doesn’t know it?
(or am I just stating the blatantly obvious)
I think it’s: If I unload the dishwasher and there is a bowl that needs another washing and I continue to insist that the way I loaded the dishwasher is The True Correct Way: FAIL! (and dumped)
I think so too. I am always amazed when couples bring up issues like which way the toilet paper should hang or how the dishwasher should be loaded. There is only two ways this can go:
- The complaint is a proxy for much larger issues
OR
- One of the people in the relationship has never been exposed to real problems like a life threatening health problems, the death of a child, loss of home through natural disaster, or job loss.
I have been through all of #2 and I am divorced partially because of those. I have no respect whatsoever for people that harp on the trivial bullshit.Those aren’t that important in the overall scheme of things. It may be a proxy for bigger problems but do everyone a favor including yourself and address those rather than nagging about something that isn’t that big a deal. Your patner may have to change your diapers ten times a day someday when you get Alzheimers. That is what each of you signed up for. I am sure your partner takes care of things that you barely even know exist. That is the way all decent relationships work. If you don’t have one of those, don’t blame it on a household appliance.
Did anyone else immediately imagine a vampire-staking, demon-hunter SAHM? Someone get me AMC on the line!
If you don’t agree with why I won’t wear diamonds, then we can’t be together.
If you are completely anal about how I load the dishwasher we can still be together as long as you are hot but lighten the fuck up.
If you live in a black and white world of ultimatums, we can’t be together.
If you’re so proud, as to boast, of your immaturity, we can’t be together.
If you can’t understand that, I am not you, and am not interested in doing everything, the way you deem best, we can’t be together.
If you enjoy pointing out the flaws of the person you love, we can’t be together.
That sounds bad because itis but it does make a great point. People value different things differently. Females tend to focus on household chores that we see little value in. Many of them are just pointless from my perspective. OTOH, plenty of men want their wife to stay hot and they don’t do it. It is considered heartless to criticize them for that.
I say we all make deal. Husbands do household chores in a 1:1 ratio for every minute that their wives hit the treadmill (high intensity only). Everybody wins in that arrangement.
If you can’t pick your battles and simply rewash a dish, by hand, in the sink…
If you don’t know that’s not butter, then we can’t be together.
I seriously cannot wrap my head around adults being obsessed with bodies. Are people truly this shallow? If you/she were horribly disfigured in an accident, your body altered, no longer ‘hot’, you’d be out the door with a clear conscience?
Because you’re either all about the ‘hotness’ or you’re not. No ‘but it’s not an accident she got heavy!’ That’s a hairsplitting difference that reflects badly on you. Always.
Were you raised by wolves? Does anyone, making this complaint, have a moments reflection on the life lesson they are begging to have rain down upon them?
Do you simply not care a whit that you sound like the ultimate in shallow douchebags when you go on about this? I never hear these sorts of remarks that it doesn’t absolutely astound me.
Colour me amazed, yet again. Oh, and sorry for the hijack.
Being obsessed with how someone looks is marginally less dumb that being obsessed with how someone loads the dishwasher.
If you make lists of why we can’t be together, and it contains mostly petty shit that you can’t let go of, then we can’t be together.
If you live more than 500 miles away, then we can’t be together.
If you are currently in prison, then we can’t be together.
If you are dead, then we can’t be together.
Several years ago a woman ended a relationship with me because she was not happy with the direction in which I hung toilet paper and with how the pots and pans were stacked inside my kitchen cabinets.
I never pay attention to how toilet paper is hung, or how pots and pans are stacked, so if she had just asked to to do it a different way I would not have cared.
Anyway, she insisted that it was all just too disturbing for her, and it really was the reason as to why she wanted to end the relationship.
Her own house was spotless, so I do believe it is something that is very important to her.
My mistake for putting my ___ in the crazy…
.
If you don’t know that my ultimatums are almost always negotiable, we can’t be together.
If the dishes come out of the dishwasher still unclean, someone has to wash them by hand. If you load the dishwasher incorrectly and the dishes come out dirty over and over, and you have to wash them by hand over and over, it only makes sense to find another way to load the dishwasher.
Of course, it’s very rarely the man who loads the dishwasher wrongly and won’t learn the right way who has to worry about rewashing the dishes, because he “values it differently” which is to say, he doesn’t care. But the dishes still have to be clean before they’re put away, so guess who has to do it?
Now here’s mine:
If you refer to women as “females” we can’t be together. We’re possibly not the same species.
And why is that? Is housework beneath you? Is it “woman’s” work? You know, 1955 has come and gone. Welcome to the new era, when everybody gets to to everything.
Just think, if she nags and you leave, you’ll have to do your own damn dishes/housework. 
I was nearing the end of my 1.5 year relationship, and my dad told me that he’d broken up with the girlfriend before my mom because they passed a sign that said, “Spirit of '76”, and she didn’t know what it referenced. This was probably 1963.
He thought, “I can’t do this all my life.”
At that point it hit me that just because I’d been dating someone, it didn’t mean we were meant to be together. If I can’t respect my partner’s thoughts and knowledge base, I can’t truly respect them. There’s ignorant, and there’s “I don’t care about things outside my interests”.
I can’t do that.
I’ll simplify all of this: We can’t be together. It really is much better this way.
…oh and get a cat.