# If you had to be executed, how would you like to be put to death? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [July 29, 2018, 10:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-had-to-be-executed-how-would-you-like-to-be-put-to-death/818782 "2018-07-29T22:26:37Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 6
**Author:** ![Velocity](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/velocity/32/18006_2.png) [@Velocity](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Velocity)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2018, 2:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-had-to-be-executed-how-would-you-like-to-be-put-to-death/818782/101 "2018-07-31T02:19:08Z")
> [@Mnemnosyne](#): > > I answered a question much like this before. > > It’s a little (okay, a lot, in fact, ridiculously so) extravagant, but my answer would definitely be ‘vaporized (or perhaps reduced to constituent atoms, even) by being at the heart of a nuclear explosion that can be seen from the Moon with the naked eye (in a space helmet, you goof, just no magnification aid).’ Fun trivia fact: When a nuclear explosion takes place on Earth, its flash is so bright that it can be seen reflecting off of the Moon. Wonder if a lunar nuke would be seen reflecting off of the Earth’s oceans; probably would, even more so. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Tooth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c67d28/32.png) [@The\_Tooth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Tooth)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2018, 2:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-had-to-be-executed-how-would-you-like-to-be-put-to-death/818782/102 "2018-07-31T02:28:01Z")
Poisoned over the course of decades by crab meat and melted butter. ---
**Author:** ![BobBitchin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7ea924/32.png) [@BobBitchin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BobBitchin)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2018, 2:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-had-to-be-executed-how-would-you-like-to-be-put-to-death/818782/103 "2018-07-31T02:32:37Z")
> [@Alessan](#): > > I think too many people here are focusing on the utter avoidance of pain. Call me sentimental, but you only die once. I’d be willing to endure the possibility of a moderate amount - say, up to 15 seconds - of severe pain, if it means going out in style. > > So burning at the stake or crucifixion, no. They may be metal as fuck, but they exceed the 15-second limit. But firing squad? Definitely. I’d also be willing to accept a public hanging or the headsman’s ax, so long as they’re administered by professionals; I’d also drink nightshade. You can’t beat the classics. > [@BobBitchin](#): > > C4 helmet. :D:dubious: UM,? C4 Helmet:cool: That’s metal as fuck:rolleyes::D:D ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2018, 1:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-had-to-be-executed-how-would-you-like-to-be-put-to-death/818782/104 "2018-07-31T13:27:55Z")
I once asked a coroner the least painful way to die. He said to get very drunk and then freeze to death. So give me a case of good wine and lock me in the freezer. In case you are interested, the most painful way to die is being burned alive. A cop once told me the worst thing he’d ever seen were the remains of a guy hit by a train. They were spread out over three city blocks. ---
**Author:** ![Mama\_Zappa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/71e660/32.png) [@Mama\_Zappa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mama_Zappa)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2018, 2:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-had-to-be-executed-how-would-you-like-to-be-put-to-death/818782/105 "2018-07-31T14:16:54Z")
> [@SmartAleq](#): > > Swap out that nitrogen bottle for nitrous oxide and I’m on board! Oh, nonononononono! Maybe with a combo of the two… or start with nitrous + oxygen then gradually trade oxygen for nitrogen, though the studies re nitrogen asphyxiation seem to deal with sudden immersion in nitrogen only, so I don’t know what would happen with any kind of mix. I’ve had nitrous for dental work and it’s a HUGE help, but the last couple of times I’ve felt like I couldn’t get enough oxygen (note to self, ask doc to turn up the O2 in the mix). It’s a bit distressing, feeling starved for oxygen - and what was especially frightening to me was that I wanted to raise my hand to pull the mask away ( this was before they started work, while I was in the “get loopy first” phase) and **couldn’t motivate myself to move a hand**. All I could force myself to do was deliberately breathe through my mouth. So - bottom line: too stoned to do anything about it, but aware and frightened - not the easiest way to go. Of course I’m an asthmatic and anything that leads to even the briefest perception of being unable to breathe is a trigger for me. The times I’ve had IV sedation for procedures, the first couple of seconds when that stuff starts kicking in, before lights-out, are kind of pleasant. I expect that if that phrase lasted more than a second or two it would be frightening - but if you were going to cack me humanely, I wouldn’t think I’d be at that stage for long - so that gets my vote. ---
**Author:** ![gracer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/8e7dd6/32.png) [@gracer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gracer)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2018, 3:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-had-to-be-executed-how-would-you-like-to-be-put-to-death/818782/106 "2018-07-31T15:09:52Z")
I’d rather like to help determine the LD50 of LSD. ---
**Author:** ![BobLibDem](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/boblibdem/32/3149_2.png) [@BobLibDem](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BobLibDem)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2018, 3:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-had-to-be-executed-how-would-you-like-to-be-put-to-death/818782/107 "2018-07-31T15:24:38Z")
I chose lethal injection, if done properly. I would prefer to be hugging an atomic bomb when it goes off. Or smothered by Jennifer Aniston’s thighs. ---
**Author:** ![RTFirefly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c77e96/32.png) [@RTFirefly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RTFirefly)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2018, 3:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-had-to-be-executed-how-would-you-like-to-be-put-to-death/818782/108 "2018-07-31T15:36:33Z")
> [@Mean\_Mr.Mustard](#): > > I choose watching ‘2001: A Space Odyssey’ on repeat. Shouldn’t take too long. So being bored to death, then. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![postpic200](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/54ee81/32.png) [@postpic200](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/postpic200)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2018, 4:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-had-to-be-executed-how-would-you-like-to-be-put-to-death/818782/109 "2018-07-31T16:24:15Z")
tactical nuclear weapon I’m taking a lot of people with me. ---
**Author:** ![Marvin\_the\_Martian](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/marvin_the_martian/32/2898_2.png) [@Marvin\_the\_Martian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marvin_the_Martian)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2018, 5:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-had-to-be-executed-how-would-you-like-to-be-put-to-death/818782/110 "2018-07-31T17:03:50Z")
> [@BobLibDem](#): > > I would prefer to be hugging an atomic bomb when it goes off. The Slim Pickens/Major Kong method… ---
**Author:** ![Pardel-Lux](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pardel-lux/32/20182_2.png) [@Pardel-Lux](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pardel-Lux)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2018, 7:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-had-to-be-executed-how-would-you-like-to-be-put-to-death/818782/111 "2018-07-31T19:51:02Z")
I’d choose heroin overdose. I like things that blow my mind and I am told it is not unpleasant. I also hope the executioner screws it up a couple of times before he hits the right dose but there is not enough time to get cold turkey. ---
**Author:** ![jasg](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/f0a364/32.png) [@jasg](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jasg)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2018, 9:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-had-to-be-executed-how-would-you-like-to-be-put-to-death/818782/112 "2018-07-31T21:01:30Z")
Something else Anticipation of death is probably a greater punishment than death itself. So, I would choose a painless, slow acting poison - sixty or seventy years sounds about right… ---
**Author:** ![DavidwithanR](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/3bc359/32.png) [@DavidwithanR](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DavidwithanR)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2018, 9:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-had-to-be-executed-how-would-you-like-to-be-put-to-death/818782/113 "2018-07-31T21:24:29Z")
> [@Majestic\_Lee](#): > > Death by mau mau 😃 Death by anti-British Kenyan rebels doesn’t sound necessarily fun. Did you mean “mau mau” a different way? ---
**Author:** ![XT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/xt/32/456_2.png) [@XT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/XT)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2018, 9:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-had-to-be-executed-how-would-you-like-to-be-put-to-death/818782/114 "2018-07-31T21:32:56Z")
> [@MindsEye\_Watering](#): > > Something else: **nitrogen asphyxiation.** I figured gas chamber covers this, since presumably I could choose the gas. I think that this would be the easiest and most painless way. ---
**Author:** ![Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mean_mr.mustard/32/3865_2.png) [@Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mean_Mr.Mustard)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2018, 10:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-had-to-be-executed-how-would-you-like-to-be-put-to-death/818782/115 "2018-07-31T22:13:10Z")
> [@Mean\_Mr.Mustard](#): > > I choose watching ‘2001: A Space Odyssey’ on repeat. Shouldn’t take too long. > mmm > [@RTFirefly](#): > > So being bored to death, then. 🙂 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![MindsEye\_Watering](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mindseye_watering/32/3619_2.png) [@MindsEye\_Watering](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MindsEye_Watering)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2018, 11:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-had-to-be-executed-how-would-you-like-to-be-put-to-death/818782/116 "2018-07-31T23:18:21Z")
> [@XT](#): > > I figured gas chamber covers this, since presumably I could choose the gas. I think that this would be the easiest and most painless way. When I chose “Other” for nitrogen asphyxiation, it didn’t occur to me that “The Gas Chamber” could be anything other than cyanide gas. ---
**Author:** ![snfaulkner](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/snfaulkner/32/433_2.png) [@snfaulkner](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/snfaulkner)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2018, 11:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-had-to-be-executed-how-would-you-like-to-be-put-to-death/818782/117 "2018-07-31T23:28:34Z")
> [@BobBitchin](#): > > :D:dubious: UM,? C4 Helmet:cool: That’s metal as fuck:rolleyes::D:D ``` Skwisgaar: You cans try, instead of doings drugs, jackings off while yous chokes yourselfs with a leather belts around your throats, close to the points of death. Nathan: Yeah, that's a natural high. Murderface: Yeah, that's good clean fun. I do it every morning. Charles: Okay, guys. I really, really don't want to promote auto-erotic asphyxiation, okay? Murderface: God! Live a little bit, Grandma! Charles: I'm trying... it's an embarrassing death. You always have to color it differently in the media. Murderface: I think it's an awesome death. Nathan: Fucking bad-ass death. Toki: Yeah, it's better than blowing up in the space shuttle ``` ---
**Author:** ![zamboniracer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/e9a140/32.png) [@zamboniracer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/zamboniracer)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2018, 12:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-had-to-be-executed-how-would-you-like-to-be-put-to-death/818782/118 "2018-08-01T00:51:17Z")
> [@](#): > > Mudd: Do you know what the penalty for fraud is on Deneb V? > Spock: The guilty party has his choice: death by electrocution, death by gas, death by phaser, death by hanging… > Mudd: The key word in your entire peroration, Mr. Spock, was: “death.” Barbarians. I’ll take death by phaser. ---
**Author:** ![RickJay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/bb73d2/32.png) [@RickJay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RickJay)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2018, 3:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-had-to-be-executed-how-would-you-like-to-be-put-to-death/818782/119 "2018-08-01T03:24:34Z")
> [@jasg](#): > > Something else > > Anticipation of death is probably a greater punishment than death itself. So, I would choose a painless, slow acting poison - sixty or seventy years sounds about right… It’s the hornets for you, sorry, you’ve violated the rules. ---
**Author:** ![Wesley\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wesley_clark/32/20581_2.png) [@Wesley\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wesley_Clark)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2018, 4:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-had-to-be-executed-how-would-you-like-to-be-put-to-death/818782/120 "2018-08-01T04:19:26Z")
given a dose of MDMA and LSD, then knocked out with heroin, then shot in the head. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-had-to-be-executed-how-would-you-like-to-be-put-to-death/818782.md?page=5) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-had-to-be-executed-how-would-you-like-to-be-put-to-death/818782.md?page=7)