# If you had to rate your ass on a scale of one to ten... **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [October 21, 2008, 11:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-had-to-rate-your-ass-on-a-scale-of-one-to-ten/468872 "2008-10-21T11:19:12Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 19\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![photopat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/e95f7d/32.png) [@photopat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/photopat)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2008, 8:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-had-to-rate-your-ass-on-a-scale-of-one-to-ten/468872/41 "2008-10-21T20:18:03Z")
I dunno, based on a few compliments, I’d guess a 7. ---
**Author:** ![kittenlm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ce7236/32.png) [@kittenlm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kittenlm)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2008, 8:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-had-to-rate-your-ass-on-a-scale-of-one-to-ten/468872/42 "2008-10-21T20:21:26Z")
> [@wheresgeorge04](#): > > How YOU doin’? > > Joe Ha! I assure you, my ass is the only thing I have in common with J-Lo. ---
**Author:** ![Jackknifed\_Juggernaut](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/9de053/32.png) [@Jackknifed\_Juggernaut](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackknifed_Juggernaut)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2008, 8:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-had-to-rate-your-ass-on-a-scale-of-one-to-ten/468872/43 "2008-10-21T20:21:44Z")
When I’m working out regularly, it’s probably an 8. I’m thin, but do free weight squats, which makes it “bubbly” pretty quickly. The problem is that I wear baggy pants for comfort, so most people can’t tell. When I’m not working out, like now, it’s probably a 6-7. On women, I like them big and round. Of course, the key to the butt is really the waist. With a small enough waist, most butts can look good. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Second\_Stone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/bbe5ce/32.png) [@The\_Second\_Stone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Second_Stone)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2008, 8:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-had-to-rate-your-ass-on-a-scale-of-one-to-ten/468872/44 "2008-10-21T20:29:50Z")
I’ve got a big butt And I cannot lie It’s in style and Will catch your eye It goes the distance Everyday It’ll please my mistress In every way I’ve got a big butt And I cannot lie It’s in style and Will catch your eye It’s got two cheeky cheeks And a crack for the freaky freaks I sit on it all day long It’s on the other side Of my schlong I’ve got a big butt And I cannot lie It’s in style and Will catch your eye I wear size 40 It isn’t small There’s a fat guy Store at the mall It can fart a smelly fart Or in distress Make a mess My pooper’s a real trooper It’s look is Super dooper I’ve got a big butt And I cannot lie It’s in style and Will catch your eye ---
**Author:** ![control-z](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/eada6e/32.png) [@control-z](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/control-z)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2008, 8:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-had-to-rate-your-ass-on-a-scale-of-one-to-ten/468872/45 "2008-10-21T20:58:27Z")
Male here, mine is small but I do have one, I think it’s probably a 6 or 7. This thread is useless without pics. Of the females that is. ---
**Author:** ![Hal\_Briston](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a9a28c/32.png) [@Hal\_Briston](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hal_Briston)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2008, 9:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-had-to-rate-your-ass-on-a-scale-of-one-to-ten/468872/46 "2008-10-21T21:04:57Z")
> [@kittenlm](#): > > I personally don’t like my ass, however every guy who ever whistles at me has to yell some comment about my ass. :rolleyes: I even have girls that I work with tell me my ass is great. I’ve been called J-Lo many, many times. I dunno what it is but people like it. I would give it a 4 or so but most other people would probably say an 8. So, let’s split the difference and make it a 6. Might I just note: It’s magnificent. ---
**Author:** ![Stauderhorse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ce7236/32.png) [@Stauderhorse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stauderhorse)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2008, 10:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-had-to-rate-your-ass-on-a-scale-of-one-to-ten/468872/47 "2008-10-21T22:11:17Z")
> [@pantheon](#): > > [SNL Transcripts: Glenn Close: 02/25/89: Glenn Close's Monologue - SNL Transcripts Tonight](http://snltranscripts.jt.org/88/88nupdate.phtml) > > Scroll down for Weekend Update > > Ah, when SNL was still kinda funny… 🙂 Much obliged. ---
**Author:** ![CAT\_1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9dc877/32.png) [@CAT\_1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CAT_1)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2008, 10:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-had-to-rate-your-ass-on-a-scale-of-one-to-ten/468872/48 "2008-10-21T22:22:54Z")
My ass was the last thing to go…but alas it has gone. Well not gone so much as quadrupled in size. I will give it a 2. I suppose there are a few people out there who like em big, that might rate it higher. I have yet to meet one. ---
**Author:** ![alice\_in\_wonderland](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alice_in_wonderland/32/176_2.png) [@alice\_in\_wonderland](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/alice_in_wonderland)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2008, 10:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-had-to-rate-your-ass-on-a-scale-of-one-to-ten/468872/49 "2008-10-21T22:27:42Z")
Humm, my ass is both round and juicy. For some people, that is a good thing. I’m going to say it’s a solid 8 as far as round, juicy asses go. If you prefer a smaller, trimmer ass, then it falls to about a 1. 'Cus baby got back. ---
**Author:** ![discodancer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e9c0ed/32.png) [@discodancer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/discodancer)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2008, 10:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-had-to-rate-your-ass-on-a-scale-of-one-to-ten/468872/50 "2008-10-21T22:28:24Z")
I’d give it a 7. It’s not huge, but it looks nice in proportion to my body. I’ve gotten many compliments on it. The last one was a guy saying it looked nice and plump. ---
**Author:** ![cmyk](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cmyk/32/3353_2.png) [@cmyk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cmyk)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2008, 10:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-had-to-rate-your-ass-on-a-scale-of-one-to-ten/468872/51 "2008-10-21T22:37:49Z")
Well, I dunno… you tell [me.](http://i213.photobucket.com/albums/cc290/ChelseagirlinDC/donkey20oatie20image.jpg) ---
**Author:** ![thirdname](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/d07c76/32.png) [@thirdname](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/thirdname)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2008, 10:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-had-to-rate-your-ass-on-a-scale-of-one-to-ten/468872/52 "2008-10-21T22:43:08Z")
This one goes to eleven. ---
**Author:** ![Darth\_Sensitive](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/58956e/32.png) [@Darth\_Sensitive](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darth_Sensitive)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2008, 12:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-had-to-rate-your-ass-on-a-scale-of-one-to-ten/468872/53 "2008-10-22T00:08:18Z")
> [@cmyk](#): > > Well, I dunno… you tell [me.](http://i213.photobucket.com/albums/cc290/ChelseagirlinDC/donkey20oatie20image.jpg) Jackass 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Sublight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/439d5e/32.png) [@Sublight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sublight)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2008, 2:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-had-to-rate-your-ass-on-a-scale-of-one-to-ten/468872/54 "2008-10-22T02:48:35Z")
If you’re into cyclist butt, then I give myself a solid 7. ---
**Author:** ![pendgwen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/3da27b/32.png) [@pendgwen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pendgwen)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2008, 5:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-had-to-rate-your-ass-on-a-scale-of-one-to-ten/468872/55 "2008-10-22T05:04:02Z")
Right now it’s about a 6. Back when I was fencing it was about an 8. I have got to start doing lunges again. ---
**Author:** ![SuntanTigerTamer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e5b9ba/32.png) [@SuntanTigerTamer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SuntanTigerTamer)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2008, 6:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-had-to-rate-your-ass-on-a-scale-of-one-to-ten/468872/56 "2008-10-22T06:14:14Z")
I polled (heh) the ladies i was out with tonight and they scored it, respectively a 4, an 7, and a 8. That East German judge was particularly harsh ☹ They also all agreed that females don’t care as much about asses as men seem to. Me, I wouldn’t mine cozying up to each and every lady in here who described theirs as big, round, sticking out, and/or J-Lo-esque. I blame rap music during my cognitive years. Thank you, rap music 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Isamu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/7c8e57/32.png) [@Isamu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Isamu)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2008, 6:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-had-to-rate-your-ass-on-a-scale-of-one-to-ten/468872/57 "2008-10-22T06:48:58Z")
Form: Like two cantaloupes wrasslin’ for their very lives Function: Very reliable Bouquet: Unspeakable Versatility: Exit only Spankability: Dangerously high Overall: 6.5 ---
**Author:** ![Bam\_Boo\_Gut](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/8c91f0/32.png) [@Bam\_Boo\_Gut](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bam_Boo_Gut)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2008, 2:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-had-to-rate-your-ass-on-a-scale-of-one-to-ten/468872/58 "2008-10-22T14:54:54Z")
Mine has caused at least two accidents that I can think of off-hand. Leering bloke crashed into a stack of orange crates … kerb crawler crashes into stationary motorbike. It’s got this fertility goddess fetish thing going on back there. I’d give it a 6 because of the difficulty finding jeans/pants that don’t gap at the waist. ---
**Author:** ![drm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a88e57/32.png) [@drm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drm)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2008, 3:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-had-to-rate-your-ass-on-a-scale-of-one-to-ten/468872/59 "2008-10-22T15:02:56Z")
That’s a fine ass… Mine’s more generic. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-had-to-rate-your-ass-on-a-scale-of-one-to-ten/468872.md?page=2)